Neal put the laptop down and glanced towards the kitchen where Peter was sitting at the table, making plans for the transplant and Neal's admittance in a week.

Neal wasn't ready but the doctors felt he was and they had to move fast; he knew the longer they waited the better chance of a relapse and that decreased his odds immensely.

"Neal, you ok?"

"Tired" the ex-con admitted.

"Not surprising. They just called with your counts."

"Let me guess" Neal glumly said. "I need to go in for more blood."

Peter nodded. "They said they'll be ready for us in two hours..."

"And the transfusion will take 4 hours" Neal muttered with a deep sigh.

"Bring your laptop. I know Mozzie put enough on there to keep you busy for a year."

"Peter this seems so surreal..."

"I know." Peter sat down next to Neal. "You're going to beat this."

"And if I don't?"

"Neal, the odds are in your favor."

"Someone has to bring those odds down. How do you know it won't be me?"

"Don't." Peter patted Neal's leg before standing.

"Peter, if I die there are things you need to know. Things you'll need to find" Neal added as he looked away.

"So tell me."

"If I do you'll have to arrest me. If things go south I won't have time..." Neal paused with a weary smile. "My deathbed confession could take hours."

Peter shook his head as he walked to the kitchen, returning with paper and an envelope.

"Here." He handed it to Neal. "Write everything down today and seal the envelope. I won't read it unless you..." Peter refused to go on.

"Unless I die" Neal finished for him. "Peter you sure you can ignore the temptation?"

"I think I'll have other things to worry about. Now put your mask on."

"Peter..."

"You know the rules. You wear that in public. If we go now we can stop by the apartment and see how Elizabeth is doing."

"Peter, what are you doing back here?" They had just left an hour ago for Neal's transfusion.

"He kicked me out" Peter said as he glanced around the small apartment. "Did everyone leave already?"

"Yeah, we're pretty much done here. It's as clean as it's going to get."

"And small" Peter added. "I was hoping to talk to Diana and Clinton. I was going to invite them to our place for dinner."

"Miss them, don't you?"

Peter nodded. "I just want this to start so we can get it over with."

Elizabeth neared Peter and wrapped her arms around his waist, holding tight. "We still have our plan in place?"

"Oh yeah" Peter whispered as he held her. "Once Neal is doing better and out of the hospital, we get Mozzie to babysit and I sneak home." It could be months but at least it was something to look forward to.

"Can't wait" Elizabeth said as she wriggled free. "Shouldn't you go back to the hospital?"

"Neal is fine. He's writing his memoirs and doesn't want me hovering. Besides I can think of something better to do with my time." He reached for Elizabeth but she easily avoided his hands. "Peter, not here. This is Neal's place to get well."

Sighing Peter rolled his eyes. "OK, let's go get something to eat."

"His memoirs?" Elizabeth suddenly asked.

Peter smiled. "He's writing everything down he wants me to know in case he dies."

"And you're letting him? Peter, he shouldn't be talking like that."

"One, I can't stop him and two...it keeps him busy so I can spend time with my wife. Let's go. We're wasting precious time." Peter retrieved Elizabeth's jacket from the closet and guided her out of the apartment.

Peter grabbed his robe before shuffling downstairs in his bare feet. He thought he heard the TV on and knew that Neal must be up. His partner had been staying with them for the past week; it was Peter's idea so he could keep an eye on his friend and when Neal didn't protest he knew the younger man didn't want to be alone.

The week had been busy with last minute tests and more paperwork and meetings with doctors and therapists to ensure that Neal was physically and mentally able to go through the arduous process that would begin tomorrow.

Neal had passed with flying colors; though Peter was concerned about his emotional well being. Each day Neal seemed to be slipping away a little more, as if preparing himself and those around him for what could happen. Peter and Elizabeth had spent the week reeling Neal back in with a quick hug or an arm around his shoulder and just talking about the future and ensuring Neal that he would be a part of it.

"Can't sleep?" Peter asked as he strolled towards the sofa.

"No" Neal answered as he flipped stations again. "Sorry if I woke you."

"You didn't." Peter sat down next to him. "I couldn't sleep either."

After watching Neal flip through stations at a rapid speed, Peter grabbed the remote and turned the TV off.

"It's ok to be scared" Peter quietly commented as Neal pulled his legs up and rested his face against his knees.

"I know I am" Peter continued as he gently cupped Neal's neck.

"It was nice of everyone to come to dinner tonight."

"Felt like a funeral" Neal whispered in a thick voice.

"Did Mozzie ever call back?"

"No." He hadn't shown up for dinner and Peter knew Neal was worried about him.

"Hey, come here." Peter pulled Neal back until the younger man was leaning on him. When Neal didn't protest Peter went a little further and wrapped his arm around Neal, holding him tight as Neal rested his head against Peter.

"Mozzie will be fine and so will you" Peter quietly soothed.

"I am scared" Neal admitted between deep breaths.

"I know." Peter ran a hand through Neal's hair, knowing with the next round of chemo it would be gone. He knew Neal wasn't looking forward to that but he also knew June had a few caps made for when it did happen.

"Neal, do you think you can sleep?"

"Can we stay here?" Neal countered.

"Sure" Peter said as he turned the TV back on, allowing some noise to filter in.

Peter didn't think any day could move slower. The night had dragged and neither man had slept. Elizabeth's demeanor when she came downstairs spoke for how little sleep she had gotten.

Elizabeth made breakfast and no one ate. Quietly they got dressed and put Neal's hospital suitcase in the car. All of Peter's things were at the apartment and he planned to go back and forth to take a shower when possible.

Elizabeth tried to hold the tears back but it was impossible when she hugged Neal goodbye. He remained stoic as he pulled away and quietly got into the car.

"Let me know when I can visit" Elizabeth said as Peter tried to console her.

"I will. I'll call you later." After a quick kiss Peter got into the car and drove away. Elizabeth watched after them with the tears flowing freely down her face.

After a quiet car ride Peter parked and they headed towards the hospital. Even Peter couldn't muster any more encouragement; he was as scared and anxious as Neal was and there was nothing left to say.

"Suit."

Both men stopped with the familiar voice and waited for Mozzie to appear from the shadows.

"Neal, I think a black mask would work better. More mysterious."

Neal smiled as he removed the mask.

"I'll see if they have any."

Mozzie approached them.

"You better take care of him" Mozzie addressed Peter.

"I will."

"Neal, you call me."

Neal nodded.

"Mozzie you'll be able to visit once Neal has engrafted."

"In there." Mozzie pointed towards the building.

"Yes, in there and I expect you to show up when I call" Peter remarked.

"Neal, we need to go." Peter grasped his shoulder and gently pushed him forward.

They passed by the quirky man and Neal smiled with a slight shrug. Mozzie showing up meant a lot.

At the door of the hospital Neal stopped and stared up at the sun, knowing he might never feel it again.