"May, what are you doing, it's six am - oh," Coulson sounded surprised as she wandered into the kitchen to find May, her face reddened by the steam emitting from the stove. "Are you boiling bamboo leaves?" He looked hopeful. "Tell me this means I get to have joong," he said excitedly. "I haven't had those since the Academy."
"My mother always did wonder who was eating them," she said wryly as she lifted another batch of leaves from the stove to the sink. "As she put it, 'you're certainly not getting any fatter, Melinda, so someone has to be eating them'. I never told her it was you."
"Anything I can do to help?" he asked, suddenly awake. May nodded towards the stove, then towards the pile of bamboo leaves that was sitting on the island.
"Get those into the stove, will you? And see the Chinese sausage on the counter? Eight pieces from each length." Coulson nodded, humming as he set to work. For a while, the two of them worked in companionable silence, broken sometimes only by the scrubbing of a brush against the leaves.
"Are you making joong?" Lincoln asked sleepily, poking his head into the kitchen. May and Coulson nodded from their respective positions, and Lincoln perked up instantly. "Want me to get the pork belly?" May waved a hand, and Lincoln immediately went to wash his hands, dousing down the meat.
The three of them worked until the sun was well into the air, filtering through the only window in the base onto the kitchen island. Coulson had finished cutting the sausage, and was busy mixing beans and sticky rice together.
"Simmons, the tea bags are on the other end of the counter," May told her when the scientist wandered in, looking thoroughly confused. "I want you to make yourself, Fitz and Bobbi some, then go get some sleep. Yes, I know you've been working all night," she said without even looking up. "Tea. Sleep."
"Yes, Agent May," Simmons sighed, leaning past her to set the teakettle onto the stove. "But if I may ask, what are you doing?"
"That's for you to know after you've slept. And if you could, get Fitz to bed, too. We're going to need all hands on deck for this later."
"You said you were going to go to the bathroom," Skye accused sleepily later as she meandered into the kitchen, where Lincoln, Coulson and May were assembling ingredients into bowls on the table. "You never came back."
"Sorry," Lincoln said apologetically. "But May and Coulson were making joong. I used to make it during the new year at Afterlife." Skye's face scrunched up in confusion.
"Wha's that?"
"It's rice, wrapped in leaves, basically," May answered as she set a bowl of chinese sausage onto the table. "You're all going to learn how to make it later," Skye brightened, clapping her hands in delight.
"Wait, why not now?"
"Because certain agents," May raised her voice to the point where she knew Fitz, Simmons and Bobbi could all hear. "haven't had sleep yet, and we're not doing anything until they have,"
"Loud and clear, May," Bobbi yelled back sleepily, and the four of them turned to see the three scientists stumble from the lab, Bobbi carrying Simmons in her arms. Hunter emerged not soon after, Fitz slumbering in his embrace.
"Hold it right there," Skye ordered, lifting her phone to take a picture. "Okay. You can go now. I'll just bring this up at your weddings."
"Shut up, Skye," Bobbi muttered, ducking to hide her face in Simmons' hair.
"You know, even the zodiac ships it,"
"Shut up!"
"Oh my god, tiny scientists sleep forever," Skye exclaimed impatiently later that afternoon as she lounged on the couch with Lincoln, waiting for the rest of them get up. "I know a part of me should be glad that the tiny ones are sleeping, for one, but at the same time, they could at least have some caffeine!"
"What year is it?" Bobbi muttered as she emerged, rubbing sleep from her eyes. "Did I pull a Rogers or something?" She stumbled towards the kitchen, muttering something about 'damn experiments' and 'damn Jemma' as she went.
Lincoln turned to Skye, whose mouth was open. "Don't," he said warningly as her eyes geared up to make a quip towards the kitchen.
But she was already there. "Betcha got s'more of that Smorse, Morse!" she called cheerfully. The tinkering of dishes in the kitchen went silent, and Skye got a sinking feeling in her stomach. "Oh, shit..."
"I told you so" was all Lincoln got out before Skye had to leap out of the chair like a woman possessed, shrieking as Bobbi peeled out of the kitchen with a knife in her hand. The ensuing chase could be heard all around the base as it made two laps before coming to a stop right outside the kitchen, Skye muttering prayers to Thor.
"What in the heavens is going on?" Simmons exclaimed as she came to a stop in front of the kitchen. "Bobbi, what in the world are you doing with that knife?" She turned to Skye. "And Skye, what are you doing in the kitchen? Frankly, I'm surprised."
"Well, Bobbi here was just telling me how much she wanted s'more of - okay, okay, I'll stop!" Skye threw her hands in the air as Bobbi waved the knife threateningly. "I won't say anything, alright?" Bobbi glowered as she stepped into the kitchen, tossing the knife back into the drawer. Skye ran back towards Lincoln, cowering behind him with a whimper.
"Is everyone awake?" May asked, striding in. Bobbi shook her head.
"Hunter and Fitz are still out. They'll be a few hours."
"It's been long enough," Simmons said decisively, grabbing a water bottle and heading towards Fitz's bunk.
"OI, JEM, WHAT THE BLOODY HELL -" There was the slamming of a door before Simmons stepped out, a grin on her face.
"They'll be out in a moment."
"So this is joong. It's a traditional food made during the new year." Lincoln held up the finished wrapped leaves. "Usually, what's in it varies with the culture, but all of them have some form of rice and leaves in them. Today, we'll be using the Cantonese kind, with peanuts, eggs, pork belly, Chinese sausage, and tiny shrimp."
"You do as follows," May said, stepping in front of Lincoln. She set two leaves in front of each other, one overlapping the other. "Three spoonfuls of rice and peanuts onto the leaves. Add egg, belly, sausage and shrimp as so." She placed one of each on the rice. "Tuck two inches of the leaves. Fold. Roll. Tie with string." With one yank of the knot, the joong was completed to ooh's and aah's, mostly from Skye and Hunter.
"Normally, there's an exchange among families after they're done, but that's really not happening, so we dyed your strings," Coulson reeled off surprisingly, causing everyone to look at him. "What? I did the reading. Plus, I set the Academy record for most of these eaten in an hour. They had to drag me off of the couch."
"Now, I'm not expecting these to be as pretty as mine," May smirked, pointing to her finished product. "But as long as nothing ends up falling out, I'll still eat it nonetheless."
The agents set to work, Fitz and Simmons taking up the tasks like true try-hards. They precisely measured the rice, lined up the extras in linear form, and were nearly short of getting a ruler to make sure they'd folded exactly two inches. Over their heads, Hunter and Bobbi exchanged glances, silently communicating.
"Jem, you know it doesn't have to be so meticulous," Bobbi pointed out as Simmons carefully eyed the string before cutting it. "It's the thought of making it that counts." She gestured to her own small pile, where several joong laid tied in navy blue string. On her other side, Hunter was gently taking Fitz aside, encouraging him to have a little fun with his form.
"Bu' it's gotta be perfect," Simmons murmured, still carefully folding her leaves. Several folds later, she was satisfied, reaching for her string with a smile. Bobbi made a face, but said nothing, turning back to her own pile of leaves and string.
She didn't notice how Simmons slyly stole one of her own colored strings, combining it with one of her own.
"Did you see that?" Skye whispered from two seats over as she folded her leaves wrong for what seemed like the hundredth time. She made a small noise as she re-folded them, turning the package over in her hands. "Simmons totally just grabbed one of Bobbi's strings to use with hers!" She squealed quietly. "That's so cute!"
Lincoln sighed as he placed another completed joong into the pile. "I need to get you a T-shirt that says 'number one shipper'," he said. "But I gotta admit, what she did was a cute idea." Skye turned to look at him, confusion in her eyes. He reached for two more leaves, setting them onto the table. "Make one together?"
She grinned happily, and together, their combined hands scooped the rice in, lining up the extras before his hands carefully guided hers through the folds. Finally, when it was wrapped, she reached for one of her strings while he reached for his, and together, they wrapped it around the leaves, tying off the final knot. Still holding it, Lincoln leaned in for a light peck on the lips, still grinning.
"Oh, get a room, you two," Hunter scoffed without even looking up. "Any more and I'll throw rice at you two." Skye raised an eyebrow as she caught sight of Simmons nudging Fitz with her elbow, gesturing towards Hunter's strings. Lincoln followed her motions, grinning when Fitz managed to steal one of Hunter's strings to tie with his own.
"Alright, first batches in," May called, and each of them grabbed their trays, walking over to the stove to tip them in. The pots of joong boiled happily on the stove as May slipped covers on them, going back to her own wrappings. "I'm missing a few strings."
"Funny," Bobbi remarked, looking through her own pile. "So am I." Simmons and Coulson determinedly didn't look up, although the former did seem to start wrapping her leaves a little more messily.
"Coulson," May deadpanned, and when he looked up, she smooshed a bit of rice onto his face. "That's what you get for stealing my strings," she retorted, and was promptly met with her own handful of rice.
"You've started a war, May," he said, scooping up some more rice for ammo. "I intend to win this one." The handful of rice flew, but May ducked, hitting Hunter in the shoulder instead.
"Well, now, that's just insulting," he scoffed, grabbing his own handful and letting it fly at the Director. Unfortunately, he hit Lincoln, who joined in. Soon, all of them were throwing rice at each other, gaining new enemies as they seemed to miss.
Simmons had crawled under the tablecloth to hopefully escape the carnage, giggling a little as she found that Fitz had done the same thing. "Did you steal a few?" she asked him, and he shrugged.
"A couple," he said shortly, and Simmons glowed. "Doesn't mean anythin, though."
"Oh, Fitz," she scoffed gently, placing a hand on his shoulder seriously. "It means everything." They sat there for a while, absorbing the sounds of shouts and splattering rice, nearly jumping out of their skins when Joey crawled under the table, presumably to find shelter.
"Wow, you two were smart," he huffed, trying to wipe rice off of his face. "Apparently, being bulletproof doesn't equate to being riceproof. Especially when your assailant's the tallest one in the room."
"How's it look out there?" Simmons asked, and Joey shuddered.
"Skye and Lincoln have declared war on the director and May. Right now, I think it's Inhumans, 3, SHIELD 0." There was the sound of a splat, followed by a shout. "Better make that 3-1." A war cry sounded through the air. "Oh, right, and Hunter and Morse are looking for you two."
Fitz shot Simmons a scared look. "Uh, Jem..."
"They can't find us," Simmons reassured him. "After all, the least logical place to look is closest to the battle, right?"
Suddenly, there was silence. "Don't. Breathe," Joey said quietly to FitzSimmons, whose eyes were wide with terror. Without warning, the tablecloth lifted, and several handfuls of rice were splatted onto the three of them, causing the scientists to shout out in horror.
"Come on guys, come out," Bobbi called tantalizingly. "It's no fun when there's no new targets."
"Yeah, let us have a few shots at you," Hunter added. Fitz sighed, muttering something like 'never can say no to him' before crawling out, letting loose a girly scream as Hunter chased after him, a handful of rice ready.
"And then there were two," Joey said quietly.
"C'mon, Jem, truce?" Bobbi called, sticking her head into their 'fortress'. "I promise not to splatter you!"
"Promise?" Simmons asked.
"Promise."
Of course, Bobbi broke that as soon as Simmons was standing. "You promised!" Simmons shrieked in horror as the rice stuck to her forehead. She scooped up another handful of rice. "I will end you, Barbara Morse!" Bobbi went pale and dashed off, followed by Simmons' war cries.
"Hell hath no fury like a tiny British woman," Skye chortled. Just then, the timer dinged, and just like that, all grudges were forgotten as everyone scrambled to pick out a joong that wasn't their color. Even Bobbi, Simmons, Hunter and Fitz returned, the taller SHIELD agents with rice in their hair.
"And the first one out of the pot is...Lincoln," May announced as she plopped his onto a plate. "Let's hope you live up to my mother's," she said warningly as she untied it, grabbing a knife and slicing the rice straight down the middle. Hunter was next, frowning as he drew out a double-stringed one.
"Who tied one with mine and Fitz's on it?" Fitz turned an odd shade of purple and looked away hurriedly. "Huh. Don't really know whose it is, then, do we?" He turned to Fitz. "Guess we'd have to share, mate."
"Oh," Fitz blurted, surprised. "O-okay. That's fine."
"Huh. I got a double, too," Bobbi murmured, drawing the still-dripping leaves out of the pot. "With mine and Jem's." She raised an eyebrow to the back of the line at Simmons, who blushed and looked at the floor. "You up to sharing, Dr. Simmons?"
"Damn," Coulson announced as he drew one of Skye's, and automatically dug in sans fork. "Skye, I think you may have given Mrs. May a run for her money. This is amazing." Skye blushed uncharacteristically at the comment, stuffing more rice into her mouth to compensate.
May snorted. "You can call my mother to tell her that. I'm sure she'll take it fine that her own granddaughter makes joong better than she does."
Skye choked on her rice.
Leave a review! Or I'll come after you with rice and peanuts!