NARUTO A/U ADVENTURES

Pre-pre-chapter note:Had a few different moments of random directional inspiration, before the chapter was over. It started out decent, then it got kind of... juvenile, and took an angsty turn at the end, there. At least Arashi got some humor in there, on a positive note.

Pre-chapter note: I'm a lazy SOB.

If you haven't guessed, and I think most people who have added me as a favorite author, or this as a favorite story have, I'm lazy. And forgetful. And, for the past while, plagued by writer's block. For the above reasons, I haven't been updating like I hoped I would. Sorry about that. I'll try being more constant, from this point on. Also, I'm skipping the part where Naruto and Hinata teach the hellions. Saving it for a filler, should I not be able to come up with a decent idea. This chapter begins on the evening of the same day. Also, as a side-note, although Naruto's father's name has been revealed in the manga, officially, I'll continue to use Arashi as his name, because I don't feel like editing the previous chapter, although I might in future.

If one counted conception, Naruto had been in existence sixteen years. In those sixteen years, he had met his arch-rival, and fought him twice. He had fought S-ranked criminals, in places that one had to travel for days to arrive at. He had been trained to the point of near-death, several times, and the fights he had gotten into had brought him even closer. That was just his time as a genin. In those sixteen years, he had still never faced a challenge quite as insurmountable as teaching. He didn't quite know whether to respect, or hate Shikamaru for going off for a few days. Arashi walked into the living room, where Naruto lay on the couch, the daily newspaper draped over his face. Arashi sat in his armchair, which he had promised Naruto could sit in the day hell froze over. That day had yet to arrive. "Teaching troubles?" Arashi asked, hiding a chuckle.

Naruto pulled the newspaper off his face, and looked at his father, bleakly. "I friggin' hate Shikamaru", the teen grumbled "I'm gonna kick his ass when I next see him, just so you know. If the cops drag me off, will you post bail?"

"Nope. You know the rules. If you kill someone, or get a girl pregnant, you're on your own." Arashi chuckled, and said "either situation, you'll accept what comes next, in the way you know I would handle it."

"So, I would potentially be on the next train to Yukigakure, then?" Naruto asked, innocently.

"Smartass" Arashi replied, picking up his book.

Naruto looked over at what his father was reading, and groaned. "Oh god, not that ecchi crap… It's bad enough that my godfather writes porn, but my father reading it right in front of his son is just bad parenting…" he complained.

Arashi raised his eyebrow, and looked at Naruto. "What kind of healthy teenage boy doesn't like porn? If my father had left porn lying around when I was your age.." he trailed off, wistfully.

"If grandpa had left porno lying around, you'd be just like ero-sennin" Naruto interjected.

The father and son would have gotten into an argument, had the doorbell not rung at that moment. Arashi looked balefully at the door, as whoever was on the other side buzzed repeatedly. Naruto sighed, and got up to answer it. It was Sasuke, Kiba, Chouji, Neji, Itachi, and Lee. "Hey, Naruto" Kiba said, grinning "you feel like hanging out?"

"Shit is what I feel like" Naruto replied "but I don't feel like being in the house when dad's reading his porn books, so what the hell…"

Kiba sighed. "I wish my dad left porn lying around the house. Naruto, you're lucky."

Naruto rolled his eyes, and shut the door behind him. "Okay" Sasuke said, eyeing the street, to make sure it was empty. "Here's the plan. It's 6:30 now. We've got a free half-hour before the new 'Capo' movie is on. After that, we'll see what we feel like doing."

"Nothing illegal this time." Neji said, out of the blue "Hinata's coming with us tonight, and before we pick her up, I feel obligated to tell each and every one of you this: You are all my friends. I'm alive today mostly because all of you have saved me on more than one occasion, and I've returned the favor. However, camaraderie aside, I will not hesitate for a second to rip anybody who I catch hitting on my cousin into tiny pieces. Are we all perfectly clear?"

Everybody nodded, and Naruto said "I also feel obligated to say something: Neji, that is the sappiest thing I've ever heard. Ever. Unnecessary, and sappy. We all agreed that we save corny camaraderie speeches for when we're damn sure we're about to die, and nobody can make fun of you for it later. In light of that, who votes that everyone takes ten free shots on Neji's right arm, for being a wimp?"

Six hands went up. Only Neji didn't vote. He got his shots, and took them with a forced smile, as per the unspoken code. After that, they made their way to the Hyuuga compound. Neji rubbed his arm, gingerly, thinking nobody noticed. Naruto caught it. "Two more rounds for rubbing the wound!" he laughed. Motion made, motion passed.

Afterwards, they made their way to a vacant field, for a short game of football, before the movie. No chakra use allowed. Naruto and Sasuke were captains. "I get Lee" Naruto said, quickly.

"I got Itachi" (Sasuke)

"I got Kiba" (Naruto)

"Chouji, for the line." (Sasuke)

"I want Hinata." Naruto said, knowing it would be embarrassing to be picked last for anyone.

"Don't we all know it!" Kiba joked

Both Naruto and Neji gave him a shot on the arm, for that line. About three plays in, Naruto pulled Sasuke down by the back of the shirt, and got the dropped ball. Sasuke, hungry for revenge, and ever the dirty player, clothes lined Naruto in the throat. Naruto flipped over. He was up fast, and he punched Sasuke in the mouth. The game quickly became a fight. Itachi, Lee, Neji and Kiba separated the duelists. "Now I remember why we don't play games with Naruto and Sasuke... Way too competitive" Itachi pointed out.

Afterwards, they went into the theatre. Naruto and Sasuke still weren't on speaking terms, although everyone knew the animosity would be gone in about an hour. Halfway through the movie, Naruto called down the row "Pass the popcorn."

Sasuke had the popcorn, and told him to get his own. Naruto didn't want to. Thus, the spark began to spread. After, Sasuke needed his popcorn back, and Naruto wasn't quite done. They didn't take it outside, to the annoyance of the usher. So, one or the other had to be kicked out. Naruto opted to leave. He sat on the step, outside, and Hinata followed him out. "If it's Sasuke behind me, fuck off." Naruto commented.

He turned, and saw Hinata. "Sorry" he commented, looking grumpy.

"A-are you okay?" she asked, looking somewhat concerned.

"I'm kind of pissed, but other than that, I'm okay. It's not even Sasuke, really. Well, he's a prick, but that isn't it. It's the stress, really. I mean, I've been doing a lot lately. Trying to perfect rasengan, helping Kakashi patrol on day shifts, taking my jounin qualification courses, AND filling in for Shikamaru on top of that. It would get to anybody, right?" he sighed.

"This…um…This whole thing was Sasuke's idea, y-you know" Hinata quietly told him.

"What was?" Naruto asked, turning to look at the shy kunoichi.

"Tonight. He knew what you were going through, so he and Itachi set it up."

"…"

"N-Naruto…?"

"….I feel like an asshole."

He got up, thanked Hinata, and walked back into the theatre. He pulled Sasuke out of the dark room, and into the lobby. "Hey, jackass." He said "thanks!"

With that, he punched Sasuke in the arm, and walked out the door. "Hey, Hinata!" he called.

"Y---yes, Naruto?"

"Do you want to go home now?"

"um…"

"Yes, or no? I feel like going home. I'll walk you home if you want."

"O--okay"

It was about eight, when they began the short walk. Neither talked. There was nothing to say. Naruto was tired, pissed, thankful, and guilty, all at once. It hurt the head. He didn't feel like talking. He knew he'd say something he didn't mean, if he did speak. He'd start yelling at Hinata, who had done nothing to deserve it, and get Neji mad at him, too, if he opened his mouth. Hinata was just being Hinata. They got to the compound, and Naruto nodded to her. "Night" he said, gruffly, before turning around. Hinata's heart skipped a beat. She grabbed his shoulder, turned him around, and kissed his cheek. Her own cheeks burned, and she ran into the compound, before his senses could react. He stood, stunned. "Good night…" said, awkwardly, as if she could still hear him. He walked back home, silent, and still burdened by what happened to be going through his head, but now he had a new issue. He didn't know whether or not he was attracted to Hinata, or Sakura.

He got through the door, to his home, at nine. His father was still reading his porn. Naruto passed the living room. "Fun night?" his father asked.

"…"

"Ah. I get it, teen angst. See you in the morning, kiddo." Arashi called.

"…"

Naruto walked upstairs, into his room, and flopped onto his bed. He didn't bother undressing. He was exhausted. He hoped a bit of sleep would straighten everything out. Life isn't that simple.