So far you guys have suggested I send Deadpool to the NCIS world, the Regular show and The Sonic Universe. All good and keep em coming. BTW, some of you are a little confused about how Deadpool's personalities work.

*Any text that's in between the Asterisks is personality #1*

(Parentheses is the #2 personality)

If you see the ** in the dialogue it describes someone's action

Keep in mind these are Deadpool's alternate personalities that talk to him inside his head. If you're familiar with the work of Daniel Way, then you know these are usually written in the form of thought bubbles.

_Weasels Workshop_

Weasel: Ohhhh, I can't wait to oil you up baby."

Door bursts open

Deadpool:" HEY OOHHHH, Sup Weasel?"

Weasel:" DAMMIT DEADPOOL, Don't you ever knock?"

Deadpool:" And what, miss you playing "Whack a mole" on your "Wii U". "

Weasel:" Pfft, whack a mole? That game's so easy to beat, just use your hands."

Deadpool:" *snicker* I can*snicker* I Can't*resists* oh who am I kidding ,HAHAHAHAHAHAHHA, Whack a mole is easy to beat on your Wii U because you use your hands. You've been down here so long you forget that they invented this word called INNUENDO. "

Weasel:" Yes I get it , masturbation , hahahaha, I'm kind of busy right now."

Deadpool:" Yeah me too, I gotta kill a mob boss, remember , that's why I asked you to modify my M16. "

Weasel:" *sigh, stands up* Fine, let me get it before you make any "extend" jokes. *Grabs high polymer case* Here you Go *slams on table* modified 18 inch barrel , muzzle brake, and free float tube."

Deadpool:" Free float tube?"

Weasel:" A little something extra. Helps take the pressure of when you fire. Makes it all the more accurate baby."

Deadpol:" Weasel….will you marry me?"

Weasel:" Get in line, now how about my payment?"

Deadpool:" I wanna Divorce."

Weasel:" *Grrrr* I can't do this with you again Wade. I don't do Pro-bono work."

Deadpool:" Look, I can't do this without the gun. It's either that , or kidnap Mark McGuire and shoot him up with steroids."

Weasel:" How does that even help. That's like giving meth to a kid on Adderall."

Deadpool:" I throw the bullet at him, he swings and hits said bullet hard enough to go through my targets fat garlic infused head."

Weasel:" You do know that there's 1 in 10,000 chance of being hit by a baseball, do you know the odds of even hitting the bullet are? Forget it dude."

Deadpool:*I'll pay you after I get the job done. Scouts honor.

Weasel:" You were a scout when you were a kid?

Deadpool:" More like a lookout. If you can't do it for me, do it for the community , do it for the children."

Weasel:" Woah wait, this guy's traffic kids!?

Deadpool:" Nope.

Weasel:" Is he beating his own kids?

DeadPool:" Nope."

Weasel:" Then what kids are you talking about dingleberry ?"

Deadpool:" Dude, who do you think hired me."

Weasel:" *facepalm*

_Marceline's House_

With the Candy Kingdom now soaked to the candied bones (Dem Bones, remember those, whatever) Marceline and Deadpool high tailed it back to her cave. While walking in wieth Deadpool, Marceline realized that she was smiling the entire time. From when she dropped Deadpool to this moment in time. Baring her fangs was something she tried to avoid, conditioning herse;f to smile with both lips still closed. Now she looked like she was ready to suck the blood of a standup comic that just told her a dead baby joke. Regardeles , she followed Deadpool in the kitchen and sat down at her table.

Deadpool:" Yo can I boggart one of your Soda's?"

Marceline:" *still laughing* Defs bro, I only have diet though."

Deadpool:" No Prob..

*bends over to grab soda in fridge,

gotta keep my girlish figure *smacks butt*"

Marceline:" Whatever you say sugar tits. So tell me , who taught you that trick?"

Deadpool:" *Sits down and opens soda can* " Heh, everybody on my planet know it. It's like an urban myth that every idiot kid with a bath tub wants to try."

Marceline :" You got some bunked up people dude. "

Deadpool:" *chuckle and sip* You're tellin me. The guy that use to make guns got involved in a cult that worshiped the Helix Fossil?"

Marceline:" Uhh, I'm drawing a black."

Deadpool:" It's from a video game."

Marceline:" HAH! For real?"

Deadpool:" Oh yeah."

Marceline:" *chucke* *sigh* But, everything else was so funny, do you do that with every job?"

Deadpool:" I think the legendary porn star Ron Jeremy said it best " Work can be fun if you make." Except his job was fun. Plus my healing factor is like a safety net. I can concentrate better without having to worry about dying."

Marceline:" Oh that's right , I broke your neck. What's the limit on that baby anyway?

Deadpool:" Never been anxious to find out. Thing is, it works "too well." *sip*

Marceline:" *gets up to grab a glass* Too well? Oh I gots to hear dis."

Deadpool:" *sets can down* I'll show you."

With a yank from his sheath and a flick of the wrist, Deadpool sliced off his middle finger. Something countless people wanted to do.

Marceline:" DUDE, YOU LOPPED OFF YOUR SILIENT CAR HORN. WHAT THE FLIP?"

Deadpool:" Wait for iiiiiiiiittttttt. Allow me.

Deadpool lets his blood drain into her glass

Deadpool:" Heh, talk about popping the cork .

He tucked his other fingers in just to make sure it would stick out once again to its former glory. In record time the finger that raises eyebrows in one flip has been erected.

Marceline:" Woah. "

Deadpool:" Sometimes I make a joke about it. Like "Dude , my fist wants to hit you so bad it's getting a boner." "

Marceline:" Well don't make it a habit of getting a boner in lair."

*DAMN, Perfect time for a joke*

(I'm not that enthusiastic about getting a hard on with someone who can drain our blood dry(

*THAT'S THE JOKE, *hint* *hint*

Deadpool:" heh, don't fret none. I'm not a necrophiliac. Come to think of it…are there any humans on Ooo."

Marceline:" *swirls glass* Oh just one."

Deadpool:" YESSSSSSSSSSSSSS"

Marceline:" It's 15."

Deadpool:" Nooooooo"

Marceline:" But it's not like the po po's are gonna get ya. Laws are different in everykingdom."

Deadpool:" YESSSSSSS."

Marceline :" Sadly the human's a girl lover boy."

Deadpool:" Nooooooo. You're showing no mercy for my prostate, Coitus Inter-up-tus."

Marceleine:" Your welcome *Drinks whole Glass* *BELCH* and that's the single that the tank is full. Ok *stands up* Sleeping arraignments….

Deadpool:" I prefer whatever side the door's on, in case I needs a good exit strategy. Oh and please tell me you've got a mirror on the ceiling. I have a vampire fantasy theory to test."

Marceline:" Not a chance in Nightoshpere. I have a couch that…

Deadpoool:" Naw it's cool, I already set myself up with a sleeping bag outside."

Marceline:" Outside?"

Deadpool:" No offense , but I'm taking precautions in case you decide to get a late night snack."

Marceline:" Hmmff , You think that once I peeps your bod when I got munchies, I'll just help myself?"

Deadpool:" Nope, just my morning erection."

*Nailed it*

( It rises with the sun , how convenient)

Marceline: Gross Dude, can we skip talking about your junk and go to bed. I actually need sleep."

Deadpool:" Heh, I'll have plenty of time for that when I'm….oh yeah , the whole immortal thing . What i-evs. "

Marceline:" *heading upstairs * Wait , that healing crap, makes you immortal?"

Deadpool:" *Heading towards the patio* Yuppers, So I gots time to kill, Sleep tight, don't bite the bed bugs. *closes patio door."

Marceline:" I see…"

Marceline tried her best, but couldn't get a lick of sleep. She kept thinking about what Deadpool said. His healing factor, like Wolverine, made him practically immortal. She could count the creatures and people that were immortal on one hand, in this case Deadpool was no the thumb on the other hand.

She knew what it meant to be immortal. Living over 1,000 can take it's toll on any individual. Marceline had her own war in her mind just to accept that fact. To her it was more of a curse than a gift. The one question she had, was how can Deadpool be so happy, knowing the price of immortality?

_Deadpool's Head_

Deadpool:WHAM "Hi-dy HO WEASEL!"

Weasel:" Sup DP , how's tricks."

Deadpool:" It's all good brother. Watcha working on?

Weasel: My finest hour. I can make the biggest frkin gun on the planet , but this…..this is not a gun….this is art."

Deadpool:" Uhh nope, It's a rifle, with a wood finish? I told you not to watch The Home & Garden network after Sons of Guns.

Weasel:" This is a custom weight rifle. Fully calibrated to meet the requirments for a certain person who lost two finger. "

Deadpool:" Let me guess, a Yakuza gang member with "no-no's" on his record?"

Weasel:" Nope this is for "Johnny " tres" finger."

Deadpool:" Uhh, you mean "Johnny dos."

Weasel:" No, he only has three finger, why would you call him dos?"

Deadpool:" Cause, he lost two fingers."

Weasel:" He doesn't need his name to be a remind ding-bat."

Deadpool:" Whatever, can I try that out?"

Weasel:" *sigh* Go ahead."

Deadpool:" *grabs gun* hmm, how very James Bond-ish, you should put a handicap sticker on this. "

Weasel:" *sarcasm* Ha ha."

Deadpool:" Stand over at the shooting range. I want to see how off this thing is."

Weasel:" What? Dude no way."

Deadpool:" Come on, what if Johnny get a prosthetic and ya have to re-calibrate it. Dontcha wanna know how off it is.?"

Weasel:" It should be about an inch or two, let me set up some targets. That's actually a good idea."

Weasel grabs a few target and puts them up on what he calls his "Firing range." It was just the newspapers he collected covering the basement wall with a black tarp. He puts the last one up high so…..

BANG

Weasel:" WHAAA….*freezes* *turns around."

Deadpool:" DON'T MOVE* runs over with a tape measurer* Hmm let's see…two inches off."

Weasel:" *Huff puff* Do *Huff* I wanna know *Puff* what you were aiming for?"

Deadpool:" While you had your sweet little butt staring me in the face with it's brown eye, I tuned it into a target. Good thing you "bag of treats" retreated. "

Weasel:" *turns around* Next time you use my butt as a target, I'll use yours as a silencer!"

Deadpool:" 1. It ain' t *FART* that silent. 2. No interest in your butt unless you're a coke mule."

Ring

Ring

Weasel:" Get that would ya, I;m still working on getting my balls out of my throat."

Deadpool:" What am I your secretary? *walks to phone* Dats sexual harassment motha F***"

Ring?

Deadpool:" *picks up phone* Home of the Whopper what's your beef?...Oh hey Johnny , yeah it's Wade…..uh huh….uh huh…Oh…ok I'll tell him*hangs up*"

Weasel:" Was that Johnny "tres?"

Deadpool:" Yes …...aaaaaand no."

Weasel:" Spill it Wade."

Deadpool:" Let's just say, he now has a reason to be called Johnny "dos."

Weasel:" He…lost another?"

Deadpool:" Not so much lost. You know that knife game you where you get F***ing plastered and you try to stab in between your fingers."

Weasel:" Yes?"

Deadpool:" Yeah, someone dared him to use a gun and he shot one off, and not in the good way."

_Next day:Candy Kingdom_-

Cinnamon was surprisingly could at cleaning up messes, not ones that he made, because he's usually unaware of them. The Great hall of the Candy Kingdom castle were scrubbed clean and every citizen had to report for a mandatory shower ( Not what you think). At this point the Princess was furious. Despite Root Beer Guys monotone voice putting the entire crowd in a boredom induced coma, Deadpools arrival dispelled all thoughts of RBG's book, and went directly to the wanted posters.

Finn and Jake entered the great hall with grossed out faces. Every step they took inside was met with a peculiar sound. Princess Bubblegum descended the staircase when their arrival was announced by a worn down version of peppermint butler.

Princess Bubblegum:" Thank you guys for coming, I know it…

Jake:" Hold it, *lifts foot* your floor sticking on my doggy feet. *step* *step* it's kind a annoying.:

Finn:" Totes P-bubs, need any help de-sticking up the place."

Princess Bubblegum:" *sigh* After what that D-list clown did to my castle, it's been a non-stop cleaning spree."

Jake:" *step* I think I stepped on a bug, no wait….it was already stuck on the floor."

Finn:" Jake, that's harsh dude."

Bug:" YOU REPLACE YOUR FLY PAPER WITH A STICKY FLOOR, I SHALL DIE KNOWING MY ENEMY OUTSMARTED…."

Jake:" You hear something?"

Princess Bubblegum: " AHEM!, as I was saying, the antics of the aforementioned BUTT….I'm ordering my banana guards to do house searches within the candy kingdom, however you two will search for him everywhere else. "

Finn:" Um, cool beans. Any leads?"

Princess Bubblegum:" Nope."

Jake:" Any clues?"

Princess Bubblegum:" Zilch."

Finn:" We're going in this blind aren't we?"

Princess Bubblegum:" As a bat wearing bifocals."

Finn:" Oh Wads!"

Princess Bubblegum:" It is your sworn duty to protect Ooo form any threat that may befall on it. I'm counting on you Finn. I honestly don't know who he is or why he did this. Please, help me"

Finn couldn't resist that face. That smooth pale pink face with come hither eyes.

Finn:" Yes milady. Come on Jake, let's get the skadow outa here and go find ourselves a clown."

Jake:" Oh, now you wanna find a clown….hehe duty."

Both of Ooo's heroes had been given their mission. Seek out the red and black clown, and kick em in the boingloings. Once they were out of the castle, a figure appeared right next to princess bubblegum. He's presence made a sort of rattle that Bubblegum was all too familiar with.

Princess Bubblegum:" Follow them."

?:" Yes my Princess."

_Marceline's house _

Deadpool:" *opens patio door* AHH, I feel good. "

*How you sleep on wood is beyond me*

(He slept on his back, how could….OH you meant the wood patio)

Deadpool:" Hey Marcy, you up yet? "

Marceline:" AHHHYAAA"

Marceline tried a different tactic this time. She remained invisible when she woke up, and hovered near the patio door to deliver an axe kick to Deadpools head. Too bad he already put on his straps with his katanas. Instinct took over when he pulled one out far enough for her boot to land on, cutting the heel portion in half. Now it was personal.

Marceline:"*reappeared* those were my new boots. WHAT THE MATH?"

Deadpool:" Tsk tsk tsk, those create so much drag I could feel the breeze go by when you flew over me."

*When did vampires where designer clothes?"

(Interview with a Vampire, how they came to sparkles I'll never know)

Marceline:" *floated in front of Deadpool* Fine, next time you get the steel toed boots, and I'll turn your family jewels into buried treasure. "

*Is she coming on to us…nice*

Deadpool:" Whatever *cuts wrist* Come and get it!"

Marceline:" Eeew, get a glass dude."

Deadpool:" Ohhh *walks over to kitchen* too good to bite my wrist huh? *grabs wine glass and drains blood* Breakfast is served."

Marceline:" *floats over and grabs glass* *sniff* I don't know if it's that healing factor , or whatever you called it, *sips* but it's like adding vodka to a bloody mary.''

*Hey, that means they have booze here*

(Bloody mary, did she just give us the corniest response or am I drunk)

Deadpool:" Couldn't tell ya, I don't suck blood, or anything beyond a …heh, theirs actually a list am making in my head of things I suck. Go figure, but lets get to the task at hand. I'm pumped up and ready for the next one. Ya got me back in my groove so lets go to some place really uptight."

Marceline:" *sip* Oh that's easy."

Marcy grabbed a map of Ooo that she had been updating after the Mushroom war.

Marceline:" Take a look at this *points finger on map*"

Deadpool:" Castle Lemongrab? Holy crap, why did draw so much on this …it's like a Rorschach test."

*I see…a huge $$ lemon dropped in the middle of a hoard of Titans*

( I see a P**** with a C*** in the middle , using Tes**** as shields , it's like an Erotic coat of arms)

*Ok , in the name of Basement Jaxx, Where's your head at dude*

Marceline:" *sip* Princess B built it in a high altitude area, after that there was a power struggle among the Lemon People, so now it's in the desert and looks more like a prison. "

Deadpool:" Lemon people, okay?"

Marceline:" No dude, listen..this guy is the most annoying , loud, and completely bunked up creature you'll ever see. He wigs out over didly squat, and the way he yells…Freddy Kruger nails on a chalkboard."

Deadpool:" And we're going after him ….why exactly?"

Marceline:" He's just a spaz, he treats all the lemon people like cattle in a prison.I'll show you. Let me get dressed and we'll leave."

Knock Knock

Finn:" YO MARCY, It's Finn and Jake."

Marceline:" Oh glob. "

Deadpool:" What? It sounds like some kid. Probably sellin cookies or something."

*That's the girl scouts*

( Boy scouts sell popcorn covered in sugar)

Marceline:" Remember when I told you about the Hero of Ooo being tight with the princess."

Deadpool:" Nope, I was thinking about ponies."

Macreline:" *grr* that's is the hero of Ooo. "

Deadpool:" Ummm Girp."

Marceline:" I'll stall em, just…hide or something."

On that note, Deadpool high tailed it out of the kitchen. He ran upstairs in Marceline's bedroom, looking for any place that could conceal his big butt.

Deadpool:" HEY, MY BUTT IS AS HARD AS CHINESE ALGEBRA WRITER"

Sorry, his rock hard butt. Deadpools head was in full tunnel vision , everything was a blur and all he saw was her closet. He ran over while opening it , closing it behind him, and hid in the farthest corner.

_Marceline's Door_

Marceline:" Yo…Who's knockin ?"

Finn:" Hey Marcy, it's Finn?"

Jake:" I'm here too ya know."

Finn:" We popped by to ask ya a few things."

Marceline:" uhh, sure, let me change and I'll let you guys in."

Marceline turned around to see if Deadpool actually obeyed an order. He was nowhere to be found on the 1st floor , good enough. Deadpool ran upstairs as fast as he could, and went into the only room with a door already open. The last thing he wanted to happen was have the Princesses errand boy. A closet was to his right , so he figured this is basic hide and seek rules and he was the only one playing. He opened it and quickly tucked in the corner, just far enough to where he can see what was going on.

*Phew, running from a kid, we've hit a new low. Now we're in a closet*

(Really, I don't see Nick and Joe Jonas)

Deadpool:" *whisper voice* not a good time guys. I really don't know what to do if this Finn dude finds me. "

To this day, Deadpool has never killed a child before. Regardless of wither it was a meta human or an evil genius, it wasn't going to happen. Perfect example was when he was a part of the X-Force. They managed to defeat Apocalypse, the oldest and most powerful mutant. Trained by an Egyptian Warlord, 5 generations worth of experience and powers that would almost be labeled "Omnipotence."

When he was defeated, he was cloned as a child named Evan, with no memory of his dark past. The X-force were sent to retrieve him after he was kidnapped by Wolverine's son Daken. Their intent was to stick him back in his original armor, where he would return to his all-powerful self. However, Deadpool spent some time with reminded Even that even though he was a clone, he still had a choice when it came to who he wanted to be. He got the chance for a clean slate. After the ordeal, he managed to join the "Jean Grey School for Higher Learning." While Even was studying , Deadpool talked with him since he found out who he was. Deadpool told him that he should never call himself Apolalypse, and anytime he was feeling down, he would always be there him. He went so far to say that if he had a son half as cool as Evan, he'd be the proudest father. This, and this alone, was the only instance when Deadpool was called a hero.

Door closed

*Not good*

Deadpool glances through the closet screen.

Deadpool:" It's just Marcy."

*SHHHH , kid might be with her.*

And on that note Deadpool kept his mouth shut, well it was open, but he didn't speak. The cause was Marceline looping her thumbs inside her jeans, and pulling them down to her ankles. From Deadpool's view, he got a look at the grey skinned beauty's red and black striped panties that fit perfectly an her ample round butt. Next, she grabbed the hem of her shirt and pulled it off over her head , tossing her hair out of her flawless face and exposing her matching bra. Both articles of clothing went in the hamper near her nightstand. Now she needed some clean clothes...uh oh.

*DAMN RIGHT "UH OH" WRITER. Thanks to you were screwed*

Writer:" Ahem, I didn't hear any complaints when she was stripping."

Marceline walked over to the closet and opened both doors.

Marceline:" …Deadpool."

Deadpool:" umm, no, I'm a pair of your red and black panties."

Marceline:" Get my jean shorts and wife beater, there should be a stack right next to you."

Deadpool:" Ummm, *looks around* oh here they are*hands her clothes*"

Marceline:" Thanks, stay here while I get rid of Finn.*closes closet*"

*….wow, no slap in the face*

(Or verbal thrashing)

Deadpool:" or threat of a restraining order….how the F*** do we interpret that?"

*You're talking with yourself about social cues*

(Not really a good start)

_Downstairs_

Now Marceline is sporting a grey wife beater and jean shorts. She was walking down the stair while getting her hair out of the inside of her shirt.

Marceline:" Much better, thanks guys, I was starting to stank up something nasty. So what's up?"

Finn:" Eh not much, Peebs sent us to find some dingus that trashed Root Beer Guys Book reading thing."

Marceline:" *clears throat* Really? What happened exactly?"

Jake:" Long story short, some guy in a red/black outfit tossed mints in RBG's dome. After that, it gets kind of fizzy."

Marceline:" You mean fuzzy?"

Finn:" Nope. It got fizzy. RBG shot out like a fire trick hose. So the dude was all " I'm gonna grab you." RBG was all " Whhaattt" and the dude started sprayin everbody and was "MENTOS!."

Finn was reenacting the whole scene. Trying his best to mimic Deadpool's movements, but failed. Even Deadpool wasn't that bombastic.

Jake:" Bro, I think got it, chill-ax."

Marceline:" So that's all he did?"

Finn:" He made a few jokes, turned Peppermint Butler small enough to put on a sundae."

Jake:" Who puts a peppermint on ice cream? "

Finn:" Yo mamma, which is my mamma, and my mamma gave me peppermint ice cream fool. Right now peebs is pretty peeved. At this point we're only chasing one lead. Someone said they heard you playing your guitar."

Jake:" When did you start playing guitar?"

Finn:" Why are you asking random questions."

Marceline:' Yeah Jake, kind of makes you look like un underfoot character."

Jake:" Hey, back to you missy. "

Marceline :" HISSSS"

Jake:" *hides behind Finn* I meant that in the nicest way, I think, not really."

Finn:" *sigh* What ivs , so marcy, were you near the Candy Kingdom at all."

Marceline:" Actually I was, I flew by to jam out with Bonnie, then I found out she was doing some "book thing." I didn't want to get bored so I set up my amp on the roof. Then I heard someone singing about Mentos, and it was catchy , so I strummed a few chords. Gave it that rock edge. Other than that I didn't see bunk."

Finn:" I thought so , guess we're going in blind again Jake."

Jake:" Can we at least where the sunglasses."

Finn:" Jake…*puts in sunglasses* you read my mind."

This was the perfect time for a CSI: Miami pun, but are merc was still in the closet trying to figure out what just happed. Jake went into "Crime drama" mode and turned into huge makeshift cop car with his sunglasses as the headlights. Finn jumped in like a Duke and grabbed the wheel.

Finn:" Blare the sirens bro!"

Jake:" WEE OOO WEE OOO wee ooo wee oo"

Finn:" I said siren not banana guard."

After that they were gone. Marceline shut the door and let out a huge sigh. She can usually lie through her teeth, but when the perp is in the closet 10 feet away from the guys looking for him , Marcy got a little tense. She went to the kitchen and opened the fridge. After a few seconds of rummaging she found a basket of strawberries and de-pigmenting the heck out of em.

_30 minutes later_

Cabin fever started to set in. Usually time that's spent not moving is saved exclusively for naps, but being awake , hiding , bunched up.

*And were not talking about his "Johnson " *

Deadpool:" That's it *stands up* I'm outta here."

Deadpool opens the door and makes his way out of Marceline's bedroom. If the kid saw him, whatever. Boredom does not exist in the mind of Deadpool, and that's freaky. He made his way down the stairs and spotted Marceline floating above her couch napping with a basket of grey strawberries on her stomach. Was she just messing with him, that's what Deadpool was going through his mind, plus he hadn't had breakfast so those strawberries looked good. Now the name of the game was "Steal Marceline's Cherry" uhhh I mean strawberries. Inching his hand further towards the basket, Deadpool was near his target , until Marceline grabbed his wrist. She flew in the opposite direction while still holding Deadpool's wrist, flipping him over and landing on his back. The strawberries followed with a splat sound when it landed on Deadpool's face.

Marceline:" Hahaha, gotcha this time."

Deadpool:" *pulling mask up a bit* Munch munch Hmm, not bad. You can tell the difference without the red. Are they gone?"

Marceline:" Yup, there off your trail for now. Going after Lemon gran would be a good step now."

Deadpool:" *mouth full* Because no one really gives a horses $$."

Marceline:" Uh huh."

Deadpool:" Very nice, Let me finish these off and you can take me to …where ever this lemon dude is."

Marceline:" Heh, do you need some time to yourself?"

Deadpool:" What?"

*Huh*

(Oh glob no)

Marceline:" You were pretty zonked out back there. I just figured you needed some aloe time to handle yourself after seeing my drop dead un-dead bod."

Deadpool:" *stands up* Nope, I'm cool. Actually I'm relieved."

Marceline:" Say what?"

Deadpool:" In my experience , this usually falls under three things happening, 1. I get slapped.

*Thank you Siryn*

Deadpool:" 2. I get shot."

(Domino totally overreacted)

Deadpool:" 3. I need to get a lawer. It's nice to change things around. You actually remind me of this woman named Domino, except you're not pointing a gun at me* pulls gun out of holster* here."

Marceline:" Uhh what am I supposed to do with this."

Deadpool:" Point it right at me."

Marceline was curious about why Deadpool would give her a loaded gun. Curiosity set in, and she pointed it right at his skull.

Deadpool:" Ohh yeah, this is totally working for me."

Marceline:" We'll get going after you wake up"

Deadpool:" Wake up from wh…"

BANG

Marceline:" After you heal from that, *grabs glass* but not before I get some blood fresh from the source.

_Outside the Lemongrab Castle_

Still groggy, but otherwise ok to travel, Deadpool was being flown by Marceline just outside of Lemon Castle. Its location changed a few times, presently it resides in a deslote area surrounded by sand dunes. From the outside it did look like a prison, because of the search lights added to the towers. A large brick wall was built around the perimeter of the castle, with the main building that housed the current incarnation of Lemongrab. Marceline heard Princess Bubblegum conversation with other royal dignitaries about the totalitarian rule that the new Lemongrab still enforces.

She let go of Deadpool, dropping him at one of the larger sand dunes. She followed suite until they both were lying on their bellies so the search lights won't spot them.

Deadpool:" Ya know , the way you keep dropping me …"

Marceline:" Let me guess , reminds you of another chick you use to peep on?"

Deadpool:" Nope, my employer. You'd like her. "

*I could totally see that happening*

Deadpool:" You said this guy just turned his castle into a prison, or whatever. "

Marceline:" One difference, they're not exactly caged. They can roam within the walls, but if they try and escape, Lemongrab brings them to his dungeon. A whole lot of messed up junk happens in there.

_Deadpool Flashback_-

Medical Quarters of "Butler"

Butler:" Mr. Wilson, I understand you wish to be released from my program. "

Wade:" *Vomit* Does it look like we're making progress Doc?"

Butler:" From my end…yes..yes we are making progress. You just lack the big picture."

Wade:" *cough* *cough* kiss the fattest part of my ass you dick. Look at me. I'm a huge wad of scar tissue, wrapped in bandages, *cough* sprinkled with chemo drugs, AND I STILL HAVE CANCER. "

Butler:" Wade, you know I can't let you go."

Wade:" F*** THAT, I F***ING VOLUNTEERED FOR THIS S***. Either let me go, or let me die."

Butler:" Nurse?"

Nurse #1:" Yes doctor?"

Butler:" Schedule Mr. Wilson for a full nerve biopsy, fine needle aspiration. Then start with the ECT. I want him to forget this conversation. "

Nurse:" Yes Doctor, come on pizza face."

Wade:" When this is over….*vomit* you're gonna wish you killed me."

Butler:" Why would I do that Mr. Wilson. You're the breeding pit for organ harvesting, a little side job I've been working on."

Wade:" YOU SON OF A …

_Back to Ooo_-

Marceline:" Yo, *snaps fingers* Deadpool, you awake in there? "

Deadpool:" You said he's just one big lemon right?"

Marceline:" Pretty much."

Deadpool:" Well, when life hands you a lemongrab, Grab his lemons"

Deadpool pulled out his swords and ran towards the colossal wall.

Macreline: " DEADPOOL, You ding a ling. "

Marceline took flight, and hovered above him. He actually made it to the wall without the search lights following him. One started to follow him after Deadpool stopped running when sand started to kick up. He pressed himself against the wall , allowing the light to go by. The brick wall, from what Deadpool could feel, was also made from some kind of hard candy, so he plunged both of his katanas in , and climbed up all the way to the wall. He knew he was making too much noise, but that wouldn't matter in a bit. One search lite was heading towards him, that's when he drew his pistol out and put one round right in the center. The guard was distracted by the shattering glass, giving Deadpool the edge. He ran along the wall , dove in the guard tower with a flying side kick upside the lemon guards head. This went on for the remaining lights and guards. Marceline flew down after watching Deadpool being awesome.

Marceline:" Totes dude. *punches Deadpool's shoulder* good job, hey…hey.. *shakes Deadpool* are you ok."

Deadpool:" -"

She was now concerned , until she looked at what Deadpool was eyeing. Lemon people were struggling, struggling just to keep moving. Each one of them looked like they haven't eaten in months. Once they all look unique from one another, just like the day the former Lemongrab brothers birthed them from the candy they were denied. From what Deadpool saw, they all looked the same. Skinny, bound with a shock collar, some were walking with every ounce of strength, others resorted to crawling , wounded from the rocks and cement that covered the sand puncturing their skin. Marceline was right , they were cattle.

Marceline:" Wha…I didn't know it was this bad…..

_Marceline's Flashback_

996 years ago.

?:" Marceline , stay in the car. "

Marceline:" *crying* but, you can't do it, please don't"

?:" It's ok Marcy, I'll protect you. I know you don't want me to use the crown, but I can't fight a horde of zombies by myself."

Marceline:" but, *sniff* I don't want you to go, that crown turns you into something mean. *crying* I love you the way you are, please don't use it."

?:" I love you too Marceline. You'll understand when you get older, that sometimes we have make sacrifices and difficult decisions to protect the ones we love. Remember, if there Is no struggle, there Is no progress"

Marceline:" NOO!"

?:" *cups Marceline's face* I will always be here, to make those sacrifices. No matter what happens to me, I will always be here for you."

The mystery man gave Marceline a hug that any father would give his daughter. A bond stronger than blood. When the hug ended. The mystery man put on a golden crown that was covered in red jewels. Suddenly his skin turned a darker shade of blue, his hair went from sienna brown to snow white. Gusts of wind and snow surrounded him. He was lifted into the air , surrounded by ice crystals that gathered around his hands. One swipe of his hand sent large ice spears towards the oncoming zombie horde, piercing them and pinning them where they stood. The skies were now covered in dark clouds, stronger winds went against the horde , with shards of ice slicing them piece by piece. This was the power of the Ice King.

?:" COME AT ME !"

Marceline:" SIMON!"

_Back in Ooo_

Marceline snapped back in time to watch Deadpool unsheathe his blades again, except he handed one to Marceline.

Marceline:" No, No way. You can't be serious."

Deadpool:" Chaos comes in many unspeakable forms. After living for 1000 years I thought you would've seen something like this."

Marceline:" I have, but would never do a mercy killing. This may not even look like…"

Deadpool:" *takes off mask* Look at my face Marceline."

Marceline:" Woah, how did that happen."

Deadpool:" This is what happens when you hit rock bottom and desperate. When you give up your freedom for even a small sliver of hope, when people turn a blind eye to what they don't want to know about and let it fester and grow, but *puts mask back on* this is what you get for your freedom. I don't care how old you are, if there's no struggle in how you live your life, then progress becomes nothing but words."

Deadpool's words echoed in Marcelines head. It's true, she was a child of the Mushroom War, but spent most of her immortal life traveling around Ooo. From Simon to Finn, she was protected. She never asked for it, she might not even have wanted it. Marceline was not weak by any means. Over 1,000 of seeing friends die , bad upbringing, social outcasting, she is one of the strongest women in Ooo.

Marceline:" *wipes tears* Give me you little pocket knife."

Deadpool unsheathed his other sword again, tossing it to Marceline. She grabbed it without even looking towards Deadpool, her eyes were busy on the task at hand.

Deadpool:" It's not the size that counts."

Marceline:" Keep telling yourself that."

Deadpool:" Heh, want a few tips on how to handle that thing."

SWISH

Marceline swung Deadpool's katana with such precision that it sliced through his mask around his neck, but only cut through the fabric.

Deadpool:" Not bad, make sure you go for the gold, don't hesitate."

Marceline:" Same goes to you. "

They both dropped down into the enclosed yard. Both of them went separate ways to cover more ground , at least that what they told themselves. Each suffering Lemon person was met with a quick and painless death. Marceline chose to look at each one of them, and tell them that it'll be over soon. While cradling their head, she would cut their throats, letting the lemon juice bleed out. They were just about done. Marceline was about to finish , when one of the lemon people spoke to her.

Plop Top:" Th..th…thank you."

SLICE

Deadpool:" Like I said , chaos comes in unspeakable forms, but at the same time, it's ultimately up to the person witnessing it, whether it's good or bad. "

Marceline:" Shut up, I don't need you to explain something I already know. "

Deadpool:" Fair enough. If it make you feel any better , I've got a little surprise for ol lemon drop."

Marceline:" He should be at the top room in the castle.*points* right where that poor excuse for a lemon structure is."

Deadpool:"* Looks up* Heh, your right. Looks more like a Jack O Lantern carved by a dude having a seizure."

Marceline:" *chuckle*"

Deadpool:" There's that fang riddle smile."

The two of them headed straight for the castle doors. When they opened them , they went straight for the staircase, but not before engaging in a little conversation.

Marceline:" Hey , I got something better than "Lemon Drop."

Deadpool:" Lay it on me."

Marceline:" The Earl of Lemon Grope."

Both: *chuckle*

Deadpool:" Ok, wait. …Lemon "turd""

Marceline:" HAH!"

_Lemon Grab's Private Quarters_-

Lemongrab:" Hmmmmmmm, It's toooooo Silent. Theyyy ummmm must be playing the Si..sSSSSSSILENT GAME. I said nnnooo GAMESS WHEN I'M AWAKE! Guards, 7 year dungeon , for all players….except the winner, they get 7..mmmmmMILLION YEARS DUNGEON. Hello…Guardsss. You better not be playing too.

Lemongrab stood up and walked out of his room. He was wearing the grey body suit , boots, belt, and sound sword his previous forms had. His boots were the only sound he could hear while walking the corridors of the castle, until he saw a blank piece of paper in front of one if the hallways lanterns.

Lemongrab: "WA WA WAISTING…..STATIONARY , I sentence you to my private toilet paper roll…this second, well not now….but youuuuuuuuu just waot till I've had dinner. What are you doing paper, stop it."

The paper in questioned was now showing a hidden message that just appeared in black.

Lemongrab:" What are you trying to tell me. *grabd glasses* Shhaaawshhhhhank Reeeedempttttttion. Shawshank Redemption. You've now upgraded to GRAFFITI LITTLE PAPER!"

He noticed that other lanterns along the hallway had the same paper on it. Every time he found one, he stopped and waited for another message.

Lemongrab:" Longest Yard *walking* Escape From Alcatraz *walking* The Deer Hunter. "

Lemongrab went further downstairs, following the trail of papers. He didn't even noticed that his castle was completely empty. After a few more steps and hallways, he made his way towards the "Reconditioning Chamber," where the last piece of paper hung, and just lije the rest , right in front of the lantern.

Lemongrab:" Hmm…..hmmmmmmm. HMMMMMWAAAAAAA. What is taking you so long paper, TALK TO ME NOW , I COMMAND IT. *the message appeared* "O Brother Where Art Thou"….I ate him, are you questioning my judgment paper…..thhhhhis was a complete waste of my time, which is by law uuuuuuuuuuuuUUUNNNNNNN-ACEPTABLEEEEEEEEEEEEE."

WHACK

Lemongrab:" I'VE BEEN STRICKEN, Iiiiiii I'm going to pass out NOWWWW.

_Inside the Reconditioning Chamber_

Deadpool:" Wake up. Lemon bar."

Marceline:" Pfft, you'll have to do more than that."

Deadpool:" Far enough."

Deadpool puts his mouth near what he guessed was Lemongrabs ear.

Deadpool:"Lemongrab *whisper* I just wanted to let you know that this is *loud* UUUNNNAACCCCEEEEPPPPTAAAABLLEEEE!"

LemonGrab:" WOOOOOOOOOOOOHHHHHHHHH. Who are you….two..the two of you?"

Deadpool:" Well her you might know her."

Marceline:" Nope, this guy's got poo brain from eating himself, his brother, his people."

Lemongrab noticed that he was inside his own "torture chamber." Staring at Deadpool who was bent over looking right at him with Marceline in the background still holding Deadpool's katana over her shoulder. Plus he noticed the torture chamber…

Lemongrab:" It's not a torture chamber it's the Reconditioning Chamber, For you writer, 2 YEARS IN THE…

SLAP

Deadpool:" Hey, only I can do that. Besides I'd be more worried about the position you're in.

Lemongrab could see feel that he was bound to the seat he had used on projects that failed, something Deadpool can sympathize with. He used the same knots when he tied up Billy Numerous.

Deadpool:" Ya see Lemon Butt, I'm a big fan of science."

Marceleine:" Dork."

Deadpool:" The papers you were reading , were actually written in Lemon juice, I thought you'd appreciate the irony."

Marceline:" Drama queen"

Deadpool:" When held to a heat source, the acid weakens the paper releasing CO2 , and turning it into a black brown color. It's a little trick I used while hunting down a vampire. *looks back * Not you Marcy. "

Marceline:" I'm half Demon, no probs. "

Deadpool:" Really? We will geek out about it later over virgin's blood."

Marceline:" Oh so that wasn't virgin's blood you were handing out."

Deadpool:" Nice, but back to you Lemon balm. *chuckle* You should see yourself now."

Deadpool pulls out a mirror to show Lemongrab what he had done. 4 rods were embedded in Lemongrabs head, almost like alien antennae.

Deadpool:" With the help from your copper wire from your TV cable and the steel wire generously donated from Marceline's bra…

Marceline:" Dude, not flippin cool!"

Deadpool:" Don't question greatness. At this point you must have questions."

Lemongrab:" Stop SPOUTING WITCHCRAFT YOU OVER ZELOUS JESTER!"

Marceline:" I can totes see you wearing the hat."

Lemongrab:" SILENCE HARLOT!"

PUNCH

Deadpool:" Pay attention, or I won't bring out the food."

Marceline:" I'll get it."

Marceline exited the chamber and brought a couple of plates wrapped in parchment paper. She gave one to Deadpool, and set one on a stand up tray right in front of Lemongrab. Marceline and Deadpool took their parchment off, and what was revealed was heaven wrapped in a tortilla.

Deadpool:" Whoops, let me adjust our Lemon box here. Hehe, I miss my Apple Iphone right now, do guys have apple people. "

Marceline:" We got an elephant that makes a mean apple pie."

Deadpool:" Pie , Iphone. Either way I'll be a fruit ninja. Anyway, hold still Lemon grope, hey you're right , it does roll right off the tongue. I'm sticking with it.

Deadpool coiled the metal sticking out of Lemongrab's head. Two were placed near his bottom lip and the others bent above his upper lip. From there , Deadpool removed the parchment on Lemongrabs plate. Another slice of heaven.

Deadpool:" All metal has electricity , or electrons if you will. It just needs a little push. The Juice in your dome provides electrolytes and moisture to where…

ZAP

Lemongrab:' OWWWW,

ZAP

Lemongrab:" PAIN

ZAP

Deadpool:" Can I get back to my awesomeness…."

ZAP

Deadpool:" Ok I've lost him. HEY! Bottom line …When you open your mouth to I can only guess scare away bats, your lips touch the electrodes. Usually 1 lemon doesn't produce enough to hurt that bad, but at this point you're a dead ringer for the new Energizer wind up Bunny, the metal even looks like ears. With you , at least 30 volts, not enough to kill you but just enough to keep you from biting into one of my guilty pleasures."

Marceline:" *bite* Now THIS IS FOOD. What do you call this and how can I replace my blood with it."

Deadpool:" I tried that, doesn't work. It's called a Chimichanga with Salsa Verde. "

Deadpool takes a bite out of his.

Deadpool:" Ohhhhhh , *chew* I have missed these. Forget what I said , I don't feel guilty about these at all."

ZAP

Lemongrab:" OOWWW"

Marceline:''Not even for that?"

Deadpool:" Only for him not being able to eat it. "

Marcy and Deadpool ate the rest of their Chimichangas right in front of Lemongrab. Every bite they tool was another tease for the Earl. It took about 10 zaps before he became silent and hungry. Afterwards, they left the chamber, leaving the door closed but left a stick in the room, giving Lemongrab a chance to get out if he could get a hand out of the chair restraints.

The Vampire Queen and our Mercenary went to the balcony in the Earls private quarters. They both stood silent. Thinking back to all that happened in the last few hours.

Deadpool:" *sigh*"

Marceline:" Do you enjoy taking it to this level?

Deadpool:" What?"

Marceline:" I've been screwing with people's heads for centuries, but I've never taken things this far. But you still make jokes, laugh, and goof off. I just have to know that you're not getting kicks watching people suffer."

Deadpool:" Let me tell you a story."

Marceline:" Glob it, you're worse than Lemongrab, at least he kept it simple, like 7 words a sentence."

Deadpool:" Do you want an answer, this is the only way I can explain it."

Marceline:" Sure, have at it Jester."

Deadpool:" Remember when I said you reminded me of Domino?"

Marceline:''Was she like your girlfriend?"

Deadpool:" We hooked up a couple of times, but mostly we did jobs together when the money was good. One time…I wanted to join this group called the X-men. I was doing it for them because , well , I'm me. They let me on as a "probationary member." Domino and I stopped a television broadcast that would've painted a target on our backs for no good reason. After we were done, she invited for drinks in her hotel room. Next thing I knew, I was tied to the bed and passed out."

Marceline:" Is this fantasy of yours going anywhere."

Deadpool:" Pfft , Jealous much?"

Marceline:" Maybe from the farthest region of my butt."

Deadpool:" You guys have the coolest slang. So….when I woke up , she was standing over me with a look that confirmed my suspicions. Cyclops, the leader of the X-men, not the ones you got here, he told Domino to keep me under control. The X-men didn't want anything to do with me, used Domino to lure me, she ended up drugging me, and sent Wolverine, the shortest dude I've ever met in my life. They sent him to ask me to do a mission in China, because it's not something they would do. Then Domino untied me, and pushed me out of the window and I landed on the side walk from five floors. "

Marceline:" Let me get this straight, you wanted to work for a group that basically hates you. Only uses you for their dirty work. Got what I'm guessing is the closest thing to a friend you have to betray you. What does that have to do with anything?"

Deadpool:" Wouldn't you be asking the questions and giving the whole "I thought you were my bosom buddy" speech in that bed while already plotting for revenge?"

Marceline:" Is that what you did."

Deadpool:" Nope, I kept bitching about how creep me out. Then I got Domino to tell me that she's scared of chickens. So when they went on the mission without me. I found out that they were going to find our target in a local station , going through the AC vents."

Marceline:" And..?"

Deadpool:" I stopped them, by putting a chicken in that air vent. And I went on the mission alone."

Marceeline:" Wha..Hah hAHAHHAHAHHA , You mean HAHAHHA , that actually worked. "

Deadpool:" Yup, and that right there is my point. Yeah, I'm great at doing all of jobs that now one else wants to do, because that's what I'm good at. I've accepted that. Laughing is the best way around that drama crap. It's the best medicine , that I always prescribe to everyone, even without their consent."

Marceline:" Good story, very corny, but funny."

Deadpool:" It's what I'm good at."

Marceline:" Hmm, can I tell you what my medicine is. "

Deadpool:" We've gone down this far in the rabbit hole, might as well find the rabbit."

Marceline:" Music. When I jam, nothing else matters."

Deadpool:" Wanna head back and have a jam session."

Marceline: "Really , what axe do you play?"

Deadpool;' A choice between the Guitar , or me burping me ABC's."

On that final joke, Marceline laughed and grabbed Deadpool's hand and flew towards Marceline's cave. Without even realizing it , Marceline had a moment of clarity. What they did, was not making the best out of a bad situation. It was living in the present. When life hands you Lemons….Make a Tom Collins.

*That's got gin in it, it's a drink if ya haven't googled it.*

(Where were we in this moment)

*I WANNA HAVE A MOMENT WITH MARCY*

(Whatever, see ya next chapter)

*Nee ya Sext time*

(Dude!)