All the Pieces of You
The homecoming was happy, but there were some things that weren't entirely.
Soda admitted that the false leg, which he called a 'dummy' leg, didn't fit that well and actually hurt to use after a while. That's why he had the cane, too. He said once he got one that fit, he wouldn't need the cane anymore.
"They kind of just gave me this one to get me back to America, but there's supposed to be papers in the letter they're sendin' to get one that does fit."
So I called Darry and only told him that I needed to come over, because even though Soda said he would be okay walking the few blocks to the Curtis house, I could see the exhaustion around his eyes. Soda was still smiling and his brown eyes still shined, but I knew he was too tired to walk.
"I'm sorry Ponyboy won't be here," I told him, walking back into the living room after calling Darry. Soda smiled at me from the couch and pulled me down to sit in his lap. "He'll be here this weekend, though. Pony still gets homesick."
Ponyboy was at Oklahoma State University, in Stillwater, about an hour away from Tulsa.
"He's only been there a month!" Soda said, laughing. Ponyboy had just started college in August.
It didn't take long before we heard Darry's knock on the door.
"You want me to answer it?" I asked, but Soda shook his head so I moved off of his lap so he could get up. It took him a moment, just like sitting down had. Even though it was just a second, it made me sad to see him have a hard time with something that should have been easy.
I wasn't trying to be nosy, but from the couch I could see the door perfectly. Soda didn't even have it open all the way when Darry barged in and scooped him up into a hug that lifted Soda off of his feet.
Darry was crying, which I hadn't ever seen before. Not even when his parents died. But he was crying now, and holding on to Sodapop so tight that he was complaining.
"You're gonna bust my ribs, Dare," Soda teased him, but there was still a huge smile on his face. When Darry set Soda down, I watched Soda put all of his weight on his right leg until he had the cane on the floor again.
Darry noticed the cane faster than I did.
"What's this?" He asked. "Did the war make you old, baby brother?"
At the least, the Vietnam War had taken Soda from eighteen to twenty. Soda shook his head at his brother and smirked.
"Wanna fill him in, Brookie?" I reckoned explaining his new situation in life took a lot out of Soda.
"He's got a robot leg," I told Darry. "The left one, below the knee. A landmine took it off."
Soda lifted his pant leg to show Darry, just like he had for me. New tears built up in Darry's eyes. I was glad I wasn't the only one who wanted to cry about Soda's lost leg, even if Soda seemed okay with it.
While Soda and Darry sat in the living room and talked, I cooked some dinner for the three of us. I think we all agreed without saying anything that there would be time enough to tell Two-Bit, plus Pony was coming for the weekend. The news would be out soon enough.
From the kitchen, I could still hear some of their talk. Soda told Darry about being in the jungle in Vietnam and about animals they'd only seen in books. Darry caught Soda up on the happenings in Tulsa: Two-Bit's job at the Coca-Cola factory, Darry's promotion, that Tim Shepard was still in and out of jail, but Curly Shepard was doing pretty okay.
And then I heard Darry say this in a choked voice, and my heart just about broke to a million pieces: "I guess I didn't do a very good job, huh? Pony got wrapped up in a murder and you lost a leg."
After we ate and Darry left, I told Soda I thought he ought to go to bed even though it was only eight o'clock.
"You look like you could fall asleep sittin' there," I told him. And he did. His eyelids were heavy over his eyes, which had gone hazy.
"I think you might be right," Sodapop admitted, his sentence swallowed by a yawn. I was tired, too. It had been a day. I was thankful I had the next day off—the dentist office I worked at was only open Monday through Thursday.
In my bedroom, Soda showed me how to remove the false leg and unwrap the bandages he had to wear around what was left of his leg.
"It's healed," Soda said when my eyes widened in surprise. There was an X-shape across the part where his leg ended, and it was red and angry looking. "It's just a scar now."
"Does it hurt?" I asked, reaching a hand out. I wanted to touch it. If I touched it, then it would be real.
"No," he said. "Well, what's left doesn't hurt. You can touch it. Wanna hear something wild, though, Brookie?"
I ran my fingertip carefully over the red scar while Soda told me about 'phantom leg pain', which he said happened a lot the first few days after the surgery to remove the lower part of his leg.
"Oh, Darry has a girlfriend, by the way." Her name was Charlotte, and I knew Darry hadn't told Soda about her yet. Mostly because they had only started dating the week before Soda came home.
"Why didn't you tell me earlier?! I would have grilled him about it." I smiled, because I knew Soda would have just about twisted his older brother's arm to get information out of him.
Once he had removed the false leg and laid down, Soda was asleep within minutes. I stayed up a little longer, playing with his short hair. It was soft, free of the grease he used to wear in it.
I still couldn't believe that he was back. Even feeling his warm skin under my hand…it was just so crazy to me that he was here.
I traced the line of his shoulder and noticed there was a scar there that hadn't been there two years ago. It was a raised line, maybe an inch long, and already silver. An old scar, not a new on like on his leg.
I ran my thumb over it, but it didn't bother Soda at all. He was dead asleep.
Soda was only twenty then, but across his forehead I could see the faintest of wrinkles. I placed a kiss on them.
My husband, the beautiful boy I had married when I was barely seventeen, had come back to me so different.
I turned out my bedside lamp and laid my head on his chest, where I could hear Soda's heart. This, at least, had not changed. Underneath it all, he was still Sodapop, my Sodapop.