Sorry if this confuses you, hopefully it wont, but if it does it will all become clear soon (I hope XD)

also I am fairly certain there is no such thing as a 'confessionalist' but for the sake of the story i am going to pretend there is lol please to the same ^_^

hope you enjoy the chapter feel free to review xxx

Dean had finished reading about a life that belonged to him, a life he couldn't remember and really did not want. In a state of confusion, anger and desperate denial Dean grabbed the metal rusty frame of his bed and flung it to the side of the room, screamed and watched as it screeched across the floor. This did help his anger but did nothing for the desperate denial he was clinging onto, that this was all somehow a dream. The package fell to the floor and papers scattered by his feet. Dean rolled his eyes as he reluctantly bent down to pick them up. The first one he came to was the picture of his dad. His mug shot, record and prison details were in deans hands filling him with sadness. His father looked full of hatred in the picture and his eyes, they gave Dean shivers, his eyes were dead. Dean stared at this picture and got lost in the thoughts of this dad, about his bravery and selflessness that apparently were not traits of the 'real' John Winchester. When Dean heard the door open he looked up eyes beginning to fill with tears but Dean fought them away. He watched as a head appeared from behind the door. It was a slim man with dark messy hair and deep azure blue eyes. Dean overwhelmed with happiness stood up and hugged Castiel thanking god he found him to take him back to the motel room.

"Thank god you're here Cas. It's Gabriel its like fucking T.V. land again. You need to get holy oil and"

"Dean, Dr. Weston is here to help you, we all are and please call me Jimmy"

Dean stared at the angel, completely bewildered. He noticed Cas really didn't look like Cas; here the hell was his trench coat? He was wearing black jeans, a shirt with all the buttons undone and a white vest underneath, he looked odd.

"Cas?"

"Jimmy"

"Castiel"

"Dean please, if we are going to talk I insist you call me by my name"

"Alright fine! Ill dance to your song, ill play your little game, but I'm telling you Cas I want out."

Jimmy didn't respond

"Okay! Jimmy"

"That wasn't so hard was it?"

Dean scolded Jimmy, for talking to him like an infant.

"Now, shall we talk?"

Jimmy spoke calmly and politely, it sounded the complete opposite to Castiel and didn't suit him at all. Dean was used to deep rusty gravely talk from his angel. Jimmy gestured to the out of place bed for him to sit down, Dean did so and Jimmy took the chair.

"Jimmy, don't take this the wring way, but who the hell are you?"

"I'm your confessionalist Dean, I have been since Alistair, you didn't respond well to him, so they assigned me to you, that's how we met and we meet and talk after you wake from your reality"

"No we met when you pulled me from hell"

"Alistair isn't bad Dean, you just didn't respond to his methods"

Dean stared at Jimmy, searching his eyes for truth, which he regrettably found

"You have an answer for everything don't you, you cocky son of a bitch, where's Sam?"

"He'll be here on Wednesday"

"Everyone keeps saying that, why?"

"Because he always comes on Wednesday, whether conscious or not, you lucky to have him"

"Once a week, yeah great"

"Dean, he has to travel a whole state to get here"
"we've travelled further for less"

"No Dean you haven't, it's a lot for Sam to do every week, considering"

Not liking being out of the loop one bit especially as it concerned his baby brother, so he snapped at Jimmy

"Considering what?"

"Considering his wife Jessica is going to have the baby anytime now, but he still comes to see you"

"What?"

Sam was with Jessica, living an apple pie life. Dean didn't understand but at least Sam seemed like he was okay, there were more pressing matters to discuss anyway

"What about my father"

Dean shouted shoving John's mug shot in Jimmy's face

"My dad is dead"

"No Dean, he's alive. You know I'm telling the truth, you now your dads a bad man and well screwed with your head from a very early age."

Dean was not going to accept this information anytime soon and was certainly not going to allow this guy to insult his dad, Dean was angry no one offends his family. He got up and bent down so he looked Jimmy dead in the eye, faces inches apart.

"Don't talk like that about my father"

Jimmy was strangely comfortable with his and Deans positioning, even though he was being threatened, he was probably used to it. Jimmy simply looked at Dean and raised his hand to cup Dean's tense stressed face; it was strangely intimate and worryingly familiar. Dean felt Jimmy's hand and wanted to pull away, but the softness of his skin and gentleness of his touch had it impossible for Dean to do so. Instead he closed his eyes and lent into his touch, trying to feel the most from this as possible.

"I'm sorry Dean"

Jimmy spoke quiet and slowly, it was soothing and made Dean tingle. Suddenly coming to his senses Dean pulled away snapping back from whatever place Jimmy's voice sent him.

"What the fuck?"

"Dean its okay, I'm here for you. It's okay"

Jimmy put his hand onto Dean's shoulder and gripped it tightly; Dean felt reassured and sat back down on the bed as it let out a huge creek, showing its age. He had many questions, but one he simply had to get straight in his mind;

"So, he killed my mother?"

"Yes and countless others"

Dean shook his head, he couldn't believe it he wouldn't, yellow eyes had killed her and tore his family apart.

"My dad was an obsessed basted, that devoted his life to hunting the god damn demon that killed my mother and saved hundreds of lives along the way. He was not a killer"

"I'm sorry Dean, but that was his excuse for killing innocent people, like your mother. You've read the report and we've talked about this many times before. He claimed demons, vampires, were wolfs, and ghosts. But in the end it was just a twisted mind on a killing spree, morphing and brain washing his children"

Dean couldn't take anymore he could listen to this shit, he boiled over and couldn't control himself, getting to Jimmy in two strides pulled back his hand and punched him in the side of the face, knocking him to the ground

"If you've told me this before, you should have fucking seen that coming"

Nursing his face, Jimmy stood up right in Dean's personal space looking dean in the eye;

"I did. guys!"

Two men came in and held Deans arms.

"Dean if you calm down I'll be happy to talk and you can tell me all about your reality and we can try to decipher a meaning"

Dean struggled against the two men's weight

"Fuck off Cas"

"Jimmy"

He men calmly added. Dean was so annoyed at this guy's insistence Dean couldn't help but shout it in his face

"JIMMY!"

"Dean if you don't calm down these men will put you under"

"Good, I said I wanted to go home, back to where it makes sense and you're not such a douche"

Dean struggled violently with the men to prove his point, after a nod from Jimmy the men strapped dean to the bed again and left the room at Jimmy's insistence. After moving the chair next to the bed, Jimmy sat. He was silent for a while as he was making little circles on Dean's left hand.

"I don't want to do this; it kills me to let you go back"

"Jimmy, I want to go back"

"And I want you here with me"

"Jimmy, how professional is our relationship?"

Dean asked worryingly after noticing the circling on his hand. Jimmy smiled, stood and kissed Dean on the forehead and spoke into his ear, breathing the words into his skin giving him Goosebumps;

"I will get you better baby, and we can get out of here together. You're coming out of that reality of yours"

Jimmy ran his hand through Dean's hair, which completely answered Dean's earlier question, Jimmy continued talking in a hushed whisper;

"And you're going to be happy, I'll make you happy. I promise"

Jimmy's voice was so full of love; it was strange to hear that in the voice that is identical to the angels who such the vocal and emotional range of a spade. Dean closed his eyes and felt Jimmy's breathe

"Sweet dreams"

Jimmy spoke through a kiss he gave Dean on the check. Dean felt a sharp pain in his arm from the needle, which was thankfully but disturbingly masked by the warmth he got from the kiss. Dean's body relaxed and was limp Jimmy sat on the chair and watched Dean drift into his mind once more.