In this next chapter our friends get a new special item that makes them who they are. Also you've probably noticed that I am saying "John's log" now, it is just to save time. No enjoy.

Chapter 3

John's log 6/6/117:

Dr. Hasley, the "scientist", wants us for something. Commander Humbugnessnessness says it is a "wondeful suppwise" for all of us.

Later that day:

Wow, sarcasm, what a wonderful thing this is. They gave us white suits right out of Star Wars. I feel like a clone. Now all we need is a Jedi to lead us.

Commander Humbugnessnessness's log:

Damn he figured out my surprise. I shouldn't have bought this Jedi uniform and genuine Lightsaber.

And no I haven't been looking at John's log every night after dinner while he's in the bathroom.

John's log 6/18/117:

I got a great gift today from my parents. It's a personal computer. I'm online now.

John's Computer:

Page: SPARTANprogram.Earth…popup…a popup popping up on a popup that was popping up after a deleted popup on a home page…l-o-a-d-I-n-g- -m-I-s-s-I-o-n- -s-p-e-c-s- -e-x-t-r-e-m-e-l-y- -s-l-o-w-..popup…loading restart.-.-.-.-.popup… popup while loading after restarting a load after deleting a popup that popped up on a popup, which popped up on a home page-popup.

John's log 6/18/117 (10 minutes later):

Should've gotten popup blocker when they asked. Only an extra five bucks they said. But no John, you had to think it was another scam.

I have to go.Sam just set Ellen's slowly decaying body on fire. I take back what I said about him being smart.

Sam's log 6/18/117:

Fire on Ellen's body very good. Sam like fire.

Sam has to go now I'm being sent on a special mission to the firing range. yay, fire and a range to burn things in.

John's log 6/19/117

We're down to thirteen now, Sam is gone. He went to the firing range, that's all I have to say.

Now we're getting these new suits again. They said that their better than the old ones.

Later:

There just the same suits painted black and there is a gas mask on it. What now, Darth Vader's going to lead us.

Commander Humbugnessnessness's log:

Damn not again. I just wasted more money.

John's log 9/8/117:

It has been three years since my last log. We were sent out on a huge mission to stop these aliens in the deep reaches of space. There are only two teams of us left.

This is what happened:

We were sent to this planet called Cote de Azur. The word was that it had been overrun. First we met a team of lazy grunts. They were so high on methane that they thought we were trees. Since no one else on my team felt like killing them, I did the dirty work. Next we found an outpost of marines. There were only about seven left so we stayed. But we had to go and nuke a city. Of course, my team didn't want to go. I had to drag them into the Warthog. I stupidly left them to guard the car while I set the bomb. I set the bomb, killed two hunters, and booked to the car, which was circling around me. I better get promoted.

John's log 9/10/117

I didn't get promoted. I killed those friggin' dumbass elites for nothing. Gotta go, I'm being briefed on a new mission.

Commander Humbugnessnessness:

You, red and blue team, are going on a mission to attack the covenant. Now go.

John's log that night:

My life just got so great. Both red and blue teams are dead except for me and a semi-dead sniper.

Just as we shipped out we had to go back to help REACH which was under attack. I was sent on recon with my team of two while blue was sent to help out on REACH. Paul got picked off right away. Me and Loise were left to fight. We had to get the info on earth before the other side did. To make a long story short, I got the disk, Loise got shot and I fought to the Pillar of Autumn. Then I put her into a cryotube. Man, those things are hard to figure out. After that I got thrown into one.

WTF!

If john is in the cryotube, who's writing in his log… gunshots …that's for us to know and you to find out in the next chapter.

So that's chapter 3 and I'm going kind of slow with the chapters. Sorry if there wasn't too much comedy in the end there. Okay now that that's done ch4 will be along soon.