Chapter Three

Jasper

I had been given another chance and I knew it was a choice, take it or die. When I realised I wanted to live it was almost a surprise, even more so than the huge man's offer. I hated the thought of killing Zeus but I understood the necessity and I vowed his death would not be in vain. I would make a new life, be a new person. The Major was dead and a new man stood in his place although how I would survive I had no idea. My first inclination was to find Peter and his mate but then I had second thoughts. It would be too reminiscent of my old life, Peter knew me only as The Major and there was no Major any longer, besides which it was just too dangerous. If I were seen or Peter said anything then both Maria and the Volturi would know I had survived and then it would be a fight to the death, my death. I needed to find this Carlisle Cullen, if he was as the Volturi guard had told me then perhaps he could help me but where would I find him?

I lived a solitary life, hiding from humans and vampires alike and hunting only when the thirst was making me crazy. I feared The Major might take over again if I became too thirsty so I forced myself to hunt taking only those I deemed worthy to lose their lives, thieves, drug dealers, those who preyed on their fellow man became in turn my prey. Something drew me on, as if I were iron feeling the draw of a strong magnet and although I had no way of knowing if the pull were good or evil I felt I had to follow and that was how I met Alice Brandon, a nomad also looking for a new way to live. A pretty pixie like female with her own tragic history although she claimed she remembered nothing before waking as a vampire.

She too had heard of Carlisle Cullen and she'd seen me coming. Alice's gift was that of a seer, she saw the future as it was but as she warned me, "things change and so does the future so don't rely on my visions Jasper". She knew who I was but she only ever called me Jasper and we agreed to keep my past a secret unless it was absolutely necessary to tell anyone. We moved slowly northwards until we reached Boston, taking our time and talking, always talking. She never asked me about my past, she'd seen enough of it in her visions, even my escape, but we came to an understanding. Carlisle Cullen was bound to ask about our past and it was Alice who suggested we appear a couple, at least for a while. This concerned me, I had no wish for a relationship with any female, I knew only too well what I was capable of and the thought of The Major taking over if I lost control scared me. Alice seemed to understand and with gentle coaxing she schooled me into trusting myself as far as necessary to convince him we were indeed together but we never made love or anything even close. I didn't trust myself that far, nowhere near that far.

Carlisle Cullen turned out to be the strangest vampire I had ever met, his compassion hit me in waves unnerving me for a while. He already had a coven of his own although he called it his family. There was his wife Esme who was also kind and so full of love that again it staggered me. There was a daughter Rosalie, a girl Carlisle had saved from the kind of fate I knew only too well and ashamed I tried to keep my distance but she seemed to understand my reluctance to speak and went out of her way to befriend me. Her mate Emmett reminded me of the huge vampire who had confronted me in the compound but this giant wasn't dangerous, in fact he was a friendly and amiable guy who also welcomed Alice and myself.

The other son Edward was a little different from the others, he had been Carlisle's first transformation, a companion, and I could see the two of them had a close bond, very much like real father and son but for one thing. Carlisle was too easy on this son of his, Edward was the epitome of the spoilt brat and it seemed I wasn't alone in thinking that. Everyone rolled their eyes when Edward started making his demands while I just held my peace, it was none of my business and he kept his distance. When I discovered he read minds I knew he was aware of my past which sickened him but I had news for him, it sickened me even more. It did mean I was forced to tell Carlisle my real background and I waited to be asked to leave the family but again he surprised me.

"Son, we al have our guilty secrets, every one of us and that's what they remain. Secret, unless you choose to share them. No one here will speak about it, the past is gone. You are Jasper Hale, twin brother to Rosalie as you look so alike, foster children to Esme and myself. If you have any problems you come to us and we will attempt to help you. No one here will ever throw anything, any mistake, in your face. Not if they wish to remain here, the Cullen family stands together."

Everyone, even Edward, nodded and I finally felt safe, I had found my new beginning here, just as the Volturi guard had said I might.

I slipped, many times over the first few years. Learning to hunt animals instead of humans was a two-edged sword, I no longer felt the pain and fear of my prey but animal blood never satisfied like human blood had. Every time I cursed my own weakness and went to Carlisle and each time I received understanding and support. Emmett told me of his slip ups and that's when I heard of singers, those humans whose blood calls to you like a drug. Edward too had left Carlisle for some years to live on humans only to return when he realised he was becoming a monster. His words bit into me deeply and I think he understood because he came to speak to me later the same day and apologised,

"I don't know all your history Jasper and believe me when I say I don't want to, I've seen enough as it is. All I can say is that any man who can recover from the kind of horrors you've seen and reinvent himself as you've done deserves respect."

I thanked him and he knew he had surprised me because he grinned,

"I know what you all think of me, the pompous all-knowing self-centred idiot but that doesn't mean I don't see the truth in things. Sometimes I just enjoy winding everyone up, besides I like getting my own way but if you tell the others I'll deny it."

So I had a new life and a new diet was that it or could there be more waiting for me? Could I ever trust myself enough to interact with humans on a daily basis? Go to school like the others? Or work like Carlisle? Would there ever come a time when I might feel I could look for a mate like Rose had or Carlisle? I thought that was possibly a step too far, the memories of the past were always there haunting me but I wouldn't give up hope, not yet anyway.