HAT: Okay, so... enjoy!

Disclaimer: I don't own the show or the AU- if I did, I'd be bragging so hard. *dramatic light* Alas! I only own the plot and the twists I have in this! *leans over "cliff* Onward... Aoshima... *falls into a black hole*

They drank to their fill as soon as they got to the strange water. Now Stanford is cleaning Stanley's burn as best as he can. He had started out gently, but Stanley insisted that if he wants to get the burn clean he'll have to put more pressure so he complies. Other than stiffening at a particularly painful part, Stanley doesn't make any indication that he's in pain at all which makes Stanford wonder what happened to his brother to make him so tolerant to such an intense pain. Stanford knows that he'd be bawling and passed out if this had happened to him instead.

"Do you know sign language?" Stanley asks out of nowhere.

Startled, Stanford pauses his work. "What?"

"Do you know sign language?" Stanley repeats with an exasperated tone.

"Um... the basics of it," Stanford admits.

"Hmm... we'll have to work on that," Stanley mutters.

"First off, why do you ask? Secondly, how do you know sign language?"

Without missing a beat Stanley answers, "I ask because I want to know and I know becauseof this girl I dated for a while- her little brother- he was ten, I think- was deaf so I learned so I could understand him for when I had to take care of him. He was a cool kid. Now hurry up and finish cleaning up my shoulder so I can teach you. Oh, and cut my hair while you're at it- I'm tired of this mullet."

Stanford grunts in reply and once he's finished cleaning the wound he tears more of his coat to wrap it up before taking out the swiss army knife that was given to him by his brother to get a good portion of the long hair off. He knows why Stanley wants to get rid of his mullet- it's a reminder of mistakes and shows that he can't bring himself to care about anything. Cutting it into a nicer style means that he's moving on and going to start caring about something again, even if it's a little. After all, a Pines man's hair is a way to see through them easily and it's easy to see that Stanley stopped caring about a lot with the fact that he has a mullet.

Stanford uses the scissors to get it nice and neat before he nods and puts the multi-purpose item back into his pocket. "There, you're done."

Stanley feels his hair and smiles. "Feels good, poindexter. Maybe you should've been a barber."

That's what everyone says about Pines men- except Pines men unless they really like the haircut. It does look good, cut close in the back and trimmed up in the front- almost like his hair before he was kicked out except without all the products in his hair to keep it up.

As Stanley fixes his hair so that it's presentable- yes, Pines men are so obsessed with their hair, they could do it in the dark, blindfolded, or in their sleep (Stanley definitely got to that point in his early adulthood) quite literally- he asks. "Okay so since you know the basics of sign language, I'll show you a bit more- most of them are gonna be one-handed- and once you have those memorized, you're putting on earbuds."

"Why?"

"Because I said so," Stanley snaps and continues to style his hair. "Now, pay attention."

Over the next hour or so- it's hard to tell how much time has passed- Stanley shows his twin the hand signs for multiple things- even a few just for conversational purposes. He digs in his pockets until he finds the wanted items and holds them out to hid brother.

"What's going on?"

"Nothing," Stanley snaps and then rubs his forehead. "Do you know morse code?"

"Of course I do, dad made us learn it," Stanford reminds.

"And can you read lips?"

"Pretty well."

"Good. Here's how it's gonna go for most of the time we're here," Stanley says, "We can talk like this every now and again- y'know, so we don't lose our voices and forget how to speak just in case we run into anyone or get out of this place- and you keep those earbuds in no matter what, understand?"

"But-"

"Understand?"

Stanford recognizes some of the desperation and nods. "Okay."

Stanley relaxes and then continue with his plan, "Anyway, you're going to practice talking with the earbuds so that you don't blow my eardrums out when you talk for a little while so that your throat muscles memorize it and then we're going to talk using morse code and sign language if we need to be silent for any reason- only take those out when we're in danger and put them right back in- got it?"

Obviously he's been thinking about this a lot since he first thought of the idea. He realizes that there's no sense in them both being handicapped for no reason, but it's terrible for them to run into danger and neither of them have all of their senses for that. Besides, Stanley suspects that the longer one listens, the more the voices seem to assault. Stanford gives no signs of hearing the voices, but since Stanley has no choice, but to listen to the voices with his eyes out of commission, they assault him immediately, but gradually. If they stay there for decades, the less Stanford hears, the more his sanity stays with him- or at least that's what Stanley hopes. Who knows what Stanford's seeing around them.

Meanwhile Stanford is still wondering what has his brother so insistent on him wearing earbuds. It doesn't make any sense in this quiet cave for him to wear earbuds- the only thing that can really drive someone insane are the eyes that seem to make up the walls and ceiling of the cave.

Despite this he nods before common sense kicks in and he says. "Yes."

"Put them in," Stanley orders.

Stanford doesn't, but he says with a louder voice than normal, "They're in!"

Stanley leans forward and looks like he's about to fall so Stanford leans forward and grabs his shoulders. Immediately Stanley's hands go to his ears and his fingers to into the canal. Stanford shouts in surprise and backs away, batting his brother's arms away from himself.

"Put them in, Stanford," Stanley growls.

Clever, Stanford thinks while putting in the earbuds. Once they're secure he focuses on his brother and sees him saying something, but he can't quite make out what's being said. He frowns in frustration and tries to make out the words, but it seems that his brother is muttering something.

Stanford leans forward and taps his brother's arm to make the message in morse code, "I _c-a-n-t_ h-e-a-r_ y-o-u."

Stanley moves forward and touches his ears and the the earbuds that make a strange, deep noise, but otherwise he can't hear anything.

Once satisfied Stanley leans back and signs while speaking, "Good. Rub your hands twice when you understand what I'm saying, rub once if I'm going to fast or if I need to repeat myself, rub three times for I don't know." Stanford snaps twice. "Now, for a game plan of survival. I'll tap you twice really hard when I hear something strange and you look around. For now, we've got water, but what we also need is food and I'm really not ready to murder you so that I can have something to eat. Where there's water, there's usually food. Do you see anything like plants around here?"

Stanford looks around carefully and finds nothing other than rock in sight. He rubs his hands once.

Stanley says something under his breath- most like a curse word- before turning to his brother fully and talks again, "Okay, well, we can survive a little while without food anyway, we just gotta conserve energy and drink water. Lucky for you I know how to survive in a desert. Let me know if you see anything okay?"

Stanford rubs his hands twice.

"Now let's get some sleep. I'll keep the first 'watch' and listen for anything. You get some rest- you probably haven't slept in weeks."

Before Stanford can protest Stanley's already pulling him down so that his head rests on his lap and immediately Stanford goes to sleep.

Once Stanley hears the soft breathing of his brother he listens to his surroundings while trying not to hear the voices. He doesn't know if he even wants to hear what they have to say- they sound malicious, gleeful, and everything in between- but he's forced to hear them while he "stands watch" for his brother.

Stanley contemplates taking off his blindfold, but remembers how desperate his brother was for him to keep it on. Yes, he can't break his brother's trust again, but if Stanford breaks his promise, he's going to rip the blindfold off no matter what.

But for now, he sits and listens and prays that they'll get out of this hellhole soon.

HAT: There's my complete and utter twist of things!

Mabel: That cave sounds... creepy.

HAT: What else do you expect in a place that made McGucket want to erase his mind?

Mabel: Not that!

HAT: *shrugs* Well, they don't tell us what's on the other side of the portal so... kinda open for debate there.

Mabel: Point. *turns to readers* Pretty, please, review!

HAT: Now let's get out of here and eat bacon!

Mabel: But Waddles-

HAT: *hugs Mabel with one arm and glances around sneakily* Waddles doesn't have to know.

Mabel: ... let's do it.