The Horse and Butterfly
By Jim Robert Bader
(Inspired by the works of Rumiko Takahashi)
Part Three.
Public Engagement.
Walking on crutches proved to be more of an art form than even Nabiki was prepared to handle, and having those rubber padded ends under her armpits was staring to make them sore after the frantic pace she had set, traveling the nearly two-kilometer distance between her house and Furinkan High School. To top it off a light drizzle became a brief rain on the way, further dampening her spirits, but in good order she arrived in time to wind up out of breath and much too late to prevent things from occurring as they must have.
Of course the outcome did rather surprise her when she saw the prone body of Tatewaki Kuno sprawled out in the open, slightly soggy and quite unconscious. There were also a few of Akane's squad of admirers littered about the premises, but Nabiki ignored them as she hobbled along to inspect the body of her fellow classmate, the poetry-spouting Captain of the Furinkan Kendo Fencing team, his bokken laying some distance from his hand, which further added to the mystery as Nabiki had been certain that a crowbar would not have pried it from his fingers.
To top it off someone had indented a red bruise on his forehead that spelled out the word, "Incompetent" (or she assumed that was what it was meant to spell anyway) in an angry red welt that probably would not fade for several more hours. Kuno was quite out of it at the moment, forcing Nabiki to select one of the other prone students who did not seem quite as unconscious as the others. Rapping him in the chest with the business end of one crutch, she managed to revive him, enough so that he blinked his eyes, looked up at her and said, "Tendo-san?"
"That's Sempai to you, Freshman," Nabiki said coolly, then indicated the battle ground with a nod of her head and said, "What happened?"
"Ah...it was the weirdest thing, really," Track and Field Captain Kenosuke replied, brushing hair out of his eyes as he tried to put his thoughts back in order, "Some new guy challenged Kuno to a fight and beat his lights out...it was like nothing I'd ever seen! One minute Kuno was full of himself, as usual, and the next thing you know...blamo!"
"A new guy?" Nabiki did her best to maintain a level expression, "Can you describe him at all?"
"Uh...not too tall, kind of rangy looking, had this pigtail down the back, and he wasn't wearing s school uniform...some kind of red and black Chinese outfit, I think..."
"Interesting," Nabiki said stoically, but inwardly she was feeling the surge of conflicting emotions, on the one hand elated that Ranma had defeated Kuno...on the other hand dismayed that Ranma had beaten Kuno with what sounded like incredible ease. The boy had said he was good, but to see it demonstrated like this...
Kenosuke just then took notice of the crutches that Nabiki was leaning on, glanced down at her foot and said, "Sempai? What happened to...?"
"Just an accident," she said quickly, "Nothing you need to worry about. Now, pick yourself up and wake the others...I'm gonna need help carrying Kuno-chan to the infirmary, and it's a sure bet I can't do it myself when I'm on these things..."
"Pick him up?" Kenosuke grimaced in disgust, "Do I have to?"
Nabiki just gave him one of her patented LOOKS, and that was all it took to stifle the boy's protest. Without further complaint he got up and did as he was told, all the while Nabiki wondering on the specific details of Kuno's defeat, and-more importantly-where was Ranma at the moment, especially in the light of the fact that he had obviously defeated Kuno while in the presence of Akane.
Scowling in displeasure at that thought, she herded the boys who "volunteered" to help Kuno by carrying him into the building, all the while her thought growing ever more dark and conflicted as her mood soured like the weather...
"Okay, I admit it," Akane said, "You are pretty good, and it's obvious that you're a lot better than Kuno, but that still doesn't excuse you making the both of us late for our classes."
"Hey, it's only my first day," Ranma complained as he stood holding a pair of buckets, the same as Akane, "How was I to know it would take that long to put the guy out of commission?"
"Well, thanks to you we're both being punished," Akane groused, though she had to admit that it was far from the first time that Kuno had made her late for classes, "You didn't really have to interfere, though, I could have taken Kuno in my sleep..."
"Maybe," Ranma studied the ceiling as though he was wondering just how old the building was and when was the last time they had bothered with new roofing.
"Huh?" Akane growled, "What is that supposed to mean?"
"Nothing," Ranma explained, "It's just that...anybody who's good enough to get even one good lick in against me ain't a guy to be taken that lightly. You saw how hard he fought against me, has he ever gone all-out like that against you?"
"Um...well..." Akane reluctantly conceded, thinking back to the all-too-recent encounter...
"Pitiful...these weaklings," Kuno said as he surveyed the litter of fallen bodies with a contemptful shake of his head, "How unworthy of your beauty, these lowly wretches, so easily dispatched by the hand of one who is so utterly above them..."
Ranma hooked a thumb as he glanced at Akane, "Is this guy for real?"
"Stay out of this," Akane cautioned as she assumed a fighting crouch, "Kuno, I'm ready for you. Take your best shot now."
"Hmph," Ranma stuck his hands in his pockets and rolled his weight on his heels, "Didn't know you were this popular around here, but what do these clowns see in a Tomboy like you anyway?"
"What?" Akane snapped at him, "What did you just call me?"
"Churl!" the boy in the hakama turned an angry glare towards Ranma, "Who are you who dares to address the woman I love in such a disrespectful manner? Lowborn dog! I will smite you for your insolence!"
"Hey, anytime you feel like it," Ranma smiled, "Just don't get the wrong ideas or nothing, I ain't interested in Akane, and I sure don't plan to fight for her or nothing."
"Why you...!" Akane's eyes narrowed by a deadly fraction.
"That tears it, Mendicant!" Kuno raised his bokken and declared, "For the insult you have given there can be no forgiveness! Prepare to greet your ancestors in Hell!"
"Let's see what you've got, stick-boy," Ranma smiled, tossing his bag to the side and crouching in readiness for the other boy's attack.
"I told you to stay out of this!" Akane flared at Ranma, "It's my fight, not yours!"
"Hey, you can have him when I'm done with him," Ranma replied with a cocky little smile, "This guy looks like he knows how to hold that twig of his, let's see if he knows how to use it."
"How dare you slander the name of Kuno Tatewaki, Age: seventeen, with such wretched innuendo?" Kuno snarled to the accompaniment of some overhead lightning, "Prepare to die!" he cried as he surged forward with a powerful slash that hissed through the air and cleaved the space where Ranma had been standing.
But Ranma was already airborne, somersaulting around behind Kuno before declaring, "My name is Saotome Ranma of the Saotome Ryu of Anything Goes Martial Arts!" he landed nimbly on his feet and assume a fighting crouch, "And I accept your challenge!"
"You evaded my thrust?" Kuno arched an eyebrow as he assumed a new fighting stance, "You do possess some trifling skill, but my next attack shall smite thee!"
"Smite?" Ranma blinked as he glanced at Akane "Is that even a word?"
"Look out!" Akane cried out in warning, seeing Kuno surge forward like a vengeful destroyer.
To her amazement-and that of Kuno-Ranma dodged the attack by bending his body around the slash, then avoiding the follow-up thrust before stepping into Kuno's swing and then blocked the backslash that Kuno turned on him, a jaunty smile on his handsome features.
Kuno found his right wrist locked in the grip of his opponent and struggled to free himself, finding Ranma's other hand was thrust just under his chin, lightly touching the Adam's apple, which implied that he had just scored a technical point and could have inflicted real damage if he had so intended. To his amazement the arrogant boy released him and stood away, smiling all the while at Kuno as if this were a friendly match and not a deadly encounter by his own estimation.
"Not too bad," Ranma said, "But you commit too much into your swing and don't do enough for your defenses. You're pretty wide open to a counter-attack and-
HEY!" he protested as he dodged another swing by Kuno.
"Stand still, you Cur!" Kuno snarled as he tried again to nail his opponent, to no avail as this Ranma was proving as difficult to strike as a phantom, "Let the righteous hand of Kuno Tatewaki smite you!"
"Yeah, right," Ranma ducked low under a slash, thrust a hand out into the ground and jack-knifed his body into a razor kick that partially stunned Kuno while managing to disarm him of his weapon, "See?" I told ya you were wide open...OH RATS!"
"Huh?" Akane had been watching the match with astonishment, seeing Kuno move faster and strike harder than he had ever done against her, and the ease with which Ranma avoided his assaults, but now she became aware of a falling moisture on her face and looked up in time to see the rain begin to fall in earnest, to which she went, "Uh oh..."
"Why is this happening to me?" Ranma's voice went up in pitch as his hair turned red and he diminished in size by a noticeably fraction. The next minute she went, "URK!" as Kuno's hands embraced her from behind.
"I fight on-I-eh? What the...?" it was almost comical to watch the way that Tatewaki's expression went through the gamut of emotions as his hands closed upon the bulging chest area of his transformed opponent.
Ranma-chan went almost instantly from shock and dismay to complete anger as she felt herself being fondled like a ripe fruit, and with a surge of angry intensity she broke loose from her assailant's arms and rounded on him with a massive uppercut that caught Kuno on the chin and knocked him for a loop, right into unconsciousness. She then grimaced as she glanced down at herself and growled, "Geez...he didn't have to squeeze me so hard...!"
"Come on!" Akane grabbed the redhead by the arm and pulled her away from the yard, deciding to avoid the front entrance as the laundry room would afford more privacy for switching Ranma back to his proper sex.
As they left the yard there was much milling about from the windows overhead, and an equal amount of confusion over what everyone thought they had seen of the fight between Kuno and a total stranger who one moment looked like some incredibly cute guy, and the next appeared more like an equally cute redhead.
"Did you see that?" Ryonami asked of Numa.
"Sempai ought to know about this," Numa replied before looking around and saying, "Where is Sempai?"
"Maybe she's not feeling well," Ryonami replied, "But we owe it to her to find out what we can about this guy, so we can find out what odds to place against him when Kuno is feeling better."
"Right," Numa agreed, sharing a look of satisfaction, "She'll be sorry she missed seeing him take Kuno down, but Sempai would expect us to keep up the bookings just like she was here. I wonder who he is though?"
"I'll bet Akane knows," Ryonami smiled with a confident look of calculation, "And if she does, then you can bet so does Sempai..."
"I still say that moron didn't have to grab me like that," Ranma growled in the present as he rubbed a slight bruise on his neck he didn't even remember receiving from Kuno, "What was he thinking pawing me like that anyway?"
"That's Kuno for you," Akane smiled, "He never knows when to quit or when enough is too much, but...well...now you see what I have to go through every day..."
"Every...day?" Ranma reacted with a start.
"That's right," Akane said, "Ever since Kuno made that stupid declaration that the only boy who would be worthy to date me had to be one strong enough to defeat me in combat..."
"He said that?" Ranma blinked, "What a moron!"
"I know," Akane replied, "And every day since he made that stupid statement in a public forum I've had to fight practically every boy in our school just to get to class in the morning...followed immediately by Kuno, only...somehow I always wind up beating him..."
"Oh...well, that part kind of makes sense," Ranma replied.
"It does?" Akane blinked, "How?"
"Well," he explained, "When a guy fights a girl, sometimes he...lets them win."
"But not you, huh?" Akane frowned.
"I don't like to lose," Ranma replied, "I ain't been trained to lose, that why I never do."
"Well, I'm not used to losing either!" Akane glared at him, "Wanna try me for real this time?"
"No thanks," Ranma said smugly, "You'd only lose, even if I accepted, which I don't."
"Hey," Akane insisted, "Don't underestimate me just because I'm a girl."
"Maybe for a girl you're all right," Ranma said, "But I won't fight you like that. I don't fight girls..."
"Yeah?" Akane smiled, putting down one of her pails and readying the other with both hands, "Well, what about when you are a girl?"
"Hey!" Ranma backed away, "Don't do that! We're still in school, for crying out loud!"
"So you admit I can still get the better of you, huh?" Akane grinned.
"By surprise you mean-OKAY-I admit it already!" Ranma declared as Akane readied to splash him.
"Good," Akane lowered her weapon, "You just keep that in mind some time...you've got a weakness I can exploit, so don't be so cocky."
"Sheesh, are you always this uncute or what?" Ranma glared.
"Uncute?" Akane blinked her eyes then readied her pail again, "Are you asking to see which of us is cute here, Saotome?"
"Uh...no...that's all right!" Ranma made a placating gesture, "I don't need any lessons there, thanks..."
"Good," Akane resumed her vigil, "Then why don't we talk about Nabiki instead?"
"Uh...Nabiki?" Ranma winced a little.
"Yes," Akane smiled, "She likes you, I can tell...and for Nabiki that's pretty unusual."
"She...does?" Ranma asked uncertainly, "How can you be sure?"
"Because I've never seen her get so worked up over a guy before," Akane explained, "She doesn't like to show a lot of emotion, so you have to look close to notice anything on the surface. I don't know what you did, but it got to her, and now she's probably thinking about you even if she says she isn't."
"Ah...well..." Ranma struggled for words and found his ability to come back with snappy lines was momentarily derailed by that statement, but discontentment caused him to grouse, "She sure has a funny way of showing it..."
"Hey, don't be like that," Akane urged, "You can't let Nabiki put you off like she does everyone else. She doesn't always say what she means, and she can be really defensive about showing her feelings."
"So why do you care?" Ranma asked with a noncommittal expression of his own.
"Because I think it's great that you two got together," Akane said with a sidelong expression, "Nabiki really needs somebody in her life who can shake her out of her obsession with making money and scamming the other students. She says she's doing it to earn money for the house, but I think she really just does it because she's lonely and doesn't have any other way of reaching out to other people."
"Huh?" Ranma said, "Why is that?"
"Because it gives her an edge and makes her feel important, I guess," Akane shrugged, "It means that people have to keep out of her way, that she doesn't need to fear them, or something like that anyway. I'm no psychologist, I just know my sister deep down isn't really all that bad of a person."
"So why does she feel like she's gotta be defensive and stuff?" Ranma asked, "How come she isn't more like you, practicing the martial arts?
"Nabiki...isn't a very physical person, I'm afraid," Akane replied, "She works out mostly to stay in shape, but...well...she stopped practicing with me a long time ago, when we were still kids mainly...about the same time Dad stopped teaching..."
"He did?" Ranma asked in genuine curiosity, "Why's that?"
"It's...kind of a long story," Akane glanced down, "Let's just say...a long time ago something happened...and it changed everything about my family. Nabiki...kind of just withdrew into her shell and she's never come back out. I think she's afraid of getting hurt, so she tells everyone that she doesn't need to have friends...and I think she even believes it..."
Ranma stared down at the floor and said, "If she really wants friends...she has a funny way of asking..."
"Hey, don't be like that," Akane gave him a wry look, "Has she asked you yet for any money?"
"Huh?" Ranma blinked, "No...why would she?"
"You'll find out," Akane rocked back on her heels and smiled to herself like one enjoying a secret, "Let's just say that the fact that she hasn't means she thinks more of you than just another guy she can scam for all he's worth...like Kuno."
"Kuno?" Ranma's eyes narrowed, "What's she got to do with that loser?"
"Aside from the fact that he's rich and easy to con?" Akane grinned, "You figure it out, Saotome."
"You make her sound like some kind of mercenary or..." Ranma hesitated, not wanting to say a word that even he only half-understood the meaning of.
"She's not that desperate for money," Akane glared back at him, "She may trade anything else, but even she's not that Hentai."
Ranma just glared back at the raven haired girl at his side, but before he could say something about uncute Tomboys someone else inside the classroom called out, "Hey, did you hear that guys? Nabiki's got herself a boyfriend!"
"Huh?" Ranma was startled to hear a commotion breaking out behind them as students crowded in the doorway and window all looking at him like he had just come from some other planet.
"Uh oh..." Akane remarked, sensing the beginning of real trouble...
"Oh...my head..." Tatewaki said as he started to regain consciousness, "What wondrous flights of angels do I hear bearing me to my place in the heavens...?"
"Sorry to disappoint you, Kuno-chan," the familiar voice of Nabiki responded, "But you're still very much a part of this world...you just can't see because I put a towel over your head to help reduce the swelling."
Tatewaki reached up and remarked, "So you did," he pulled the towel away and stared at the short haired girl with a much vexed expression, "What became of my foe...and how did I arrive here? That...woman...I felt...one moment I thought I had my foe within my hands...the next...it was some fair pigtailed goddess..."
"Goddess huh?" Nabiki gave a faint hint of amusement, "Well, I hate to break it to you, Kuno-chan, but you lost your fight with Saotome Ranma."
"Lost?" Kuno sat bolt upright, "I do no lose my battles, Woman! I am the great Kuno Tatewaki, the Blue Thunder of Furinkan High School..."
"I thought you were calling yourself something else this week?" Nabiki said, then dismissed the point by saying, "You lost...I've got witnesses who will testify to that..."
"Lies, slanders, I will not hear such outrageous distortions!" Kuno thundered.
"Not even when I tell you how you lost?" Nabiki curled the words with a faintly sweet smile, having formulated her plans while the tall boy was unconscious.
"What say you, Woman?" Kuno frowned, "Speak up! What do you know of the churl who dared cross swords with Kuno Tatewaki?"
"I know that he's from out of town, a martial artist who was trained by his father, and that he's recently been to China," Nabiki hinted sweetly, "How much will you pay to hear the rest?"
Kuno fumed, but long experience told him it was folly to haggle with Nabiki over money, "How do you want for your information, Tendo Nabiki?"
She stretched out her palm and said, "Two thousand yen will do for a start."
"Two thousand yen?" Tatewaki reared back, but one look in Nabiki's eyes and he relented, pulling out his wallet and giving her what she asked for, "There is your filthy lucre, now...tell me what I want to know!"
"Very well," Nabiki neatly folded the bills and slipped them down her dress, "Saotome Ranma is staying at my place."
"WHAT?" Kuno reared back as if he had been slapped, "Under your roof...the same roof as your sister, the fair Akane?"
"Yeah, but don't worry," Nabiki reassured, "There's nothing going on between them...at least not yet."
"What do you mean 'Not yet?'" Tatewaki's eyes narrowed, "What is that-that low born CUR doing in your house?"
"Oh, didn't you know?" Nabiki smiled sweetly, "His father's an old school chum of my daddy. They studied the same system and everything, in fact they're almost as tight as brothers."
"As...brothers?" Kuno blinked as he absorbed this.
"Hmmm...but that's not all," Nabiki paused, curling one lip as she hesitated before revealing the half-truth that she had cooked up to confuse him, "There's someone else staying at our place...a girl..."
"A...girl?" Kuno blinked again, his brain dangerously close to overloading on the new information.
"Her name is...um...Saotome Ranko," Nabiki lied, "She's Ranma's twin sister...in fact, you could say they're almost inseparable, joined at the hip and all that..."
"I...see..." Kuno replied in a calmer tone of voice, "So...that woman I grasped within my hands..."
"That was Ranko," Nabiki nodded, "And my guess is she didn't like it when you grabbed her."
"Indeed, forsooth, I dare say that she did protest at being handled," Tatewaki slowly reflected, "Had I but known...but I was so much blinded by my righteous rage that I did mistake her for her brother. In truth, had I not been confused at the discovery, I would have handled the matter more delicately...as it was I left my guard down and no doubt her brother-coward that he was-took advantage of my momentary distraction..."
"Ah...whatever," Nabiki could only shake her head at the latest example of Tatewaki's legendary powers of self-delusion, "The thing is...I'd stay well away from both of them if I were you. Ranma's clearly a better fighter than you, and he's pretty sensitive and protective about his sister, so I wouldn't mention her if I were you..."
"And who says you are me?" Tatewaki bristled, "And who dares claim that he is my better at arms? I will face this dog again and prove that I am his Master! Just name the time and place, Woman, and I will meet him in battle at any place of his choosing."
"You don't say?" Nabiki hid her smile as she added, "I...think I can arrange for you two to have it out in a formal setting...provided you make it worth my while, Kuno-chan."
Tatewaki scowled, "What do you want, Tendo Nabiki?"
At last she allowed her smile to show in its full predatory gleam, knowing her hook had been well baited with little barbs meant to prick Tatewaki's ego. She wanted to use the boy to test how good her new fianc really was, and since Ranma had defeated him so handily the first time, there was a good chance that she could make a little money on the side, provided she played her cards just right in setting thing up for the big impending battle.
(Just you wait, Saotome Ranma,) she silently mused to herself, (No one makes a fool of Tendo Nabiki...no one).
The little twinge in what passed for her conscience registered a slight protest at this declaration, but out of long habit she managed to ignore it. After all, it really was a pathetically small thing, that part of her mind which would normally caution her against "improper" behavior, though-oddly enough-the voice in her head sounded surprisingly a lot like Kasumi, the only person Nabiki dreaded displeasing more than she liked to feel an empty wallet. She consoled herself by mentally saying that this was nothing less than what was needed to determine the worth of the man that her father thought she should marry.
Even if she could tell that for herself at a glance, though the rebellious part of her mind that said this was also notably tiny, and just as easy to file away into the background...
Just then Ryonami came bursting into the infirmary with a big grin on her face and in a rush asked, "Sempai! Is it true that you're going to get married?"
"NANI?" both Nabiki and Tatewaki cried together, he in dismay upon hearing this news flash, she upon finding out that her big secret had just broken out over the whole campus...
"Well, Boy?" Genma asked as he and Ranma stood upon their heads, "What do you think so far of your iinazuke?"
"She's not my iinazuke, Pop," Ranma growled, "She's not my anything, so just drop it already."
"Now Son," Genma chided gruffly, "She may be a little high spirited, but that can be a good thing in a woman."
"If you think she's so great, why don't you marry her?" Ranma blurted out before silently fuming.
"Did something happen between you two today, Boy?" Genma frowned.
"I don't wanna talk about it," Ranma growled, "Just drop it already."
"Ranma," Genma rumbled ominously, "Did you do something to upset your fianc e?"
"She's not my fianc e, and I didn't do nothing!" Ranma protested, "It's just...she took something the wrong way...it kinda got out and...well..."
"You mean your engagement is no longer a secret?" Genma sighed, then righted himself and stood over the still inverted Ranma, "Is that why you're moping around here like a whipped puppy?"
"HEY!" Ranma angrily reacted, "I ain't like that!"
"Oh no?" Genma frowned, "The shame of it all...my son not only turns into a girl, he cries like one too!"
"What?" Ranma pushed up off the floor and righted himself, then fell into a fighting crouch and snarled, "You take that back or you're history, Pop!"
"I didn't raise you to be whipped little sniveling coward, Son," Genma declared without backing down in the slightest, "A real man would be going up there to apologize to his iinazuke..."
"APOLOGIZE?" Ranma blurted out, "For what?"
"For letting her be upset about anything," Genma calmly noted, "Women aren't like us, Boy, they're not logical about things, they get upset easily enough, and it doesn't have to be all your fault, but if you make them cry..."
"Cry?" the word caused Ranma to downcheck his anger level by a fraction.
"Ranma," Genma replied, "When a woman gets upset with you, the only thing you can do is to try and make it up to them. You won't be admitting to any fault, it doesn't even have to be about you, but if you don't go up there and apologize to Nabiki right now it will only be worse for you later. A real man doesn't wait to tell a woman that he's sorry if she's upset over nothing. Believe me, if you don't put a stop to this now then it will be like leaving the door open to worse troubles later, and then they pull out sharp objects and threaten you with them and..."
"Huh?" Ranma blinked, "Pop, what are you talking about?"
"Huh?" Genma blinked as if belatedly remembering what he had just been saying, and almost at once he shifted moods again and said, "Oh...nothing...forget that last part...doesn't mean a thing, nosiree! Not a thing at all...not even in the slightest..."
Ranma eyed his father dubiously as if suspecting that the old Panda-breath had finally lost it, but aloud he said, "Well...won't saying I'm sorry mean that I'm admitting I did something wrong?"
"Won't matter if you're innocent or not, Son," Genma replied, "It never does...just...believe me when I say that it's better to keep them happy."
"Uh...well..." Ranma thought about it then said, "I...guess I can go check and see how she is..."
"That's the spirit, Boy," Genma clapped him on the shoulder, "Now...move along and go see Nabiki...I'm sure the two of you can work it out together, if you just give it a chance."
Ranma's shoulders sagged slightly, but he growled half-heartedly, "Well...okay...but I still ain't calling her my iinazuke."
"Call her whatever you like, Boy," Genma nodded as he watched his son trudge away in a dispirited sulk, "Just don't say it to her face unless you want to face the consequences..."
"...So, what's really upsetting you, Nabiki?" Akane asked as she did her homework while her sister did leg-lifts on the bed, "The fact that everybody now knows that you're engaged to Ranma?"
"No," Nabiki growled back as she kept up an even rhythm with her upward kicks, being careful not to further the bruise on her ankle, "I could have managed that part if the two of you hadn't blabbed it around in front of everyone without consulting with me. Now everybody thinks I'm hung up over some...guy," she sulked in displeasure.
"Well?" Akane asked with a suggestive smirk, "Aren't you?"
"Puh-lease!" Nabiki insisted, stabbing one shapely leg up at the ceiling, "What do I look like to you, some lovesick little girl? He's just a guy, I've barely even known him for more than one whole day..."
"That's true," Akane eyed her sister with a slightly superior air as she added, "He's just a guy who tried to stand up for you when people started calling you heartless."
"He...what?" Nabiki paused with the toes of one well-arched foot pointed accusingly towards the heavens.
"That's right," Akane chimed, "You should have heard the stuff the guys in our class were calling you...things like 'Money-Grubbing Witch' and "Female Shylock,' and other stuff like that. Only the more they said things like that about you, the madder Ranma got until he told them all to go take a hike, that it wasn't any of their business what you are, and that he wasn't going to stand for hearing them call you names behind your back."
"He said that?" Nabiki blinked, "No way!"
"Well, you didn't exactly respond in kind, did you?" Akane persisted, "Telling him you didn't want his help getting home, accusing him about bragging to the whole school about your engagement...and don't say you're not engaged, okay? This is me, Sis, I saw you blush when he actually paid you a compliment."
"You call that a compliment?" Nabiki frowned, "He called me a heartless mercenary!"
"After you told him that you'd set up another match between him and Kuno," Akane tapped her pencil on her desk, "But that wasn't the part I mean...it was when you were approaching us and he didn't even see you coming. Somebody was comparing you to me, remember? And do you remember what he said?"
"Ah..." Nabiki thought about it, and abruptly she colored...
"What are you talking about, are you crazy?" Ranma declared as he rounded on one student, "No way is Akane cuter than Nabiki! What makes you guys think an uncute Tomboy like this is better looking than a real girl?"
Nabiki-who had been approaching Ranma from behind with an angry glare, intent on chewing out the boy she believed had been bragginng about their engagement to the teeming crowd of his fellow students-came to an abrupt half upon hearing that pronouncement, looking slightly stunned at hearing herself favorably compared to Akane, though only Akane herself was in a position to fully see her reaction...
"...Well..." Nabiki searched for the right words to summarize her thoughts on that particular subject.
"The guy stood up for you, even if he was insulting me when he did it," Akane said crossly, "He said he thought you were better looking than me, not that I care one bit what that arrogant Hentai thinks about me, just as long as he isn't my problem."
Nabiki narrowed her eyes and said, "Methinks thou dost protest too much, Little Sister."
"Huh?" Akane blinked, "What is that supposed to mean?"
"On, nothing," Nabiki rolled back on her shoulders, propping her arms underneath her as she did a head stand while doing the splits with both of her legs, "I've probably been spending too much time around Kuno...pay it no mind..."
"You're weird, Sis," Akane said drolly, then added, "So...what about the guy don't you like? I mean, he's arrogant, full of himself, thinks he's the greatest thing since sliced bread, and-to top it off-he turns into a girl of all things..."
"You think there's something wrong about him turning into a girl?" Nabiki countered.
"I don't know," Akane shrugged, "I mean...the idea that magic curses are real and all that...of course it freaked me out the first couple of times I saw him change, but now...well...I think it's kind of neat."
"So do I," Nabiki softly murmured.
"What was that?" Akane arched an eyebrow.
"Ah...I said I think it's not so bad that he turns into a girl," Nabiki replied, "And you're right about him being full of himself, thinks he's the world's best martial artist and all that...but..."
"Okay, spill it out," Akane sighed, "What else have you got against him?"
"Well..." Nabiki frowned as she folded her legs up and slowly rolled into an upright position...
Ranma felt an uncomfortable roiling in his stomach as he approached the bedroom door that had a wooden duck that spelled out the name "Nabiki." He was not-he sternly told himself-coming to her room in order to apologize...he had nothing to be sorry about. That mess at school was definitely not his doing, nor did he owe her an explanation...it was just...
...It was just...he remembered the angry way she had shouted at him before storming off earlier in the day, accusing him of bragging about their engagement...as if he wanted to tell people what their fathers had arranged behind their back! He still stung under the earlier accusation that he had deliberately sought her out in order to woo her, as if he'd even known what she would look like prior to their meeting! It was all Pop's fault for springing it on them so suddenly like that, and just when he and Nabiki were starting to act friendly around each other...
"Oh man," he winced, pausing at her door and preparing to knock, only to hear voices coming from the next room over, the one that had a wooden duck with the name "Akane" written in English. As he listened in he thought he heard Nabiki's voice, and that she was saying something like: "...The guy is as poor as dirt, he's practically a hermit! I've seen charity cases that were better off than him, so what makes you think I've got anything to gain from being around him?"
"Huh?" Ranma blinked, knowing implicitly that he was the one being referred to in such a depreciating manner.
"So why did you hang around with him the other day if you think he's such a money pit?" Akane asked in response to this statement.
"I...I don't know," Nabiki sounded more than slightly defensive on this point, "He just seemed like a really nice guy...offering to carry me home and all that..."
"But you like him even if he doesn't have any money, right?"
"I...I don't really know anything about him...it's just too weird, us meeting like that, and he pretends like it was an accident..."
"So what if it was an accident? Nabiki...are you honestly saying that you think this guy is smart enough to think up a plan that complicated? You ask me, he didn't seem that subtle."
"So, when did you become an expert about boys?"
"You know what I'm saying. You're just trying to think up reasons not to like the guy, but he did something that got to you. I've never seen you get this worked up over a boy, not since that time Kennosuke beat you out for that two hundred yen piece..."
"You're being ridiculous, and when did you turn into my older sister?"
"Stop denying the facts and just admit that you like the guy!"
"I'm not admitting any such thing, and if you think he's so great, why don't you marry him?"
"He's not my type, and I won't poach on your territory, Sis."
"Oh, that's right...silly me, I forgot, you still have that silly crush on Doctor Tofu..."
"You take that back! And it's not silly...besides...you know Tofu-Sensei doesn't even know I exist, not with...Kasumi around..."
"All right, truce...I'm sorry I said that, Akane-chan, I'm just...having a little trouble right now adjusting to the idea that I've become engaged to my own worst nightmare..."
"Huh?" Ranma blinked, then scowled, "Okay, if that's the way she feels..."
"Worst nightmare? Sis, you don't mean that..."
"I do too mean it, every bit of it, Akane!" Nabiki insisted, "He's my exact opposite...all brawn and very little brains, and he's so sure of himself about everything he does...it's like he's some kind of character out of an Anime, like those mysterious strangers that girls like me are supposed to fall all over and swoon at their feet..."
Ranma did not wait to hear the rest as he vaulted over the railing, thinking to himself, "And I was going to apologize to that...?"
"Well?" Akane said patiently, "Are you trying to tell me you're not swooning over him right now?"
Nabiki looked away, feeling more than slightly trapped on the subject, "Leave me alone, Sis...I'd rather work this out on my own..."
"OH!" cried a startled voice from just outside their door, startling both sisters as they recognized it instantly as belonging to their older sibling.
"Kasumi!" Akane got out of her chair even as Nabiki was on her feet and moving to the door, then both girls were at the railing looking down the stairs, where a most unusual sight greeted their astonished eyes.
Ranma stood there holding Kasumi, who had nearly fallen backwards when surprised by his sudden appearance at the top of the stairs. Ranma had managed to rescue her, but the position in which he now held the older girl was more than slightly incriminating in the eyes of her two younger sisters, both of whom were eyeing the scene with less-than-pleased expressions.
"Casanova," Akane growled, thinking that the boy had made a play for Kasumi behind Nabiki's back.
"H-Huh?" Ranma gasped as he looked up, seeing the accusing eyes turned against him, "N-No! Wait a minute! This ain't what it looks like!"
"Save it, Mister!" Nabiki snapped angrily, "I don't want to hear another word out of your mouth, in fact, I never even want to see you again, you-Pervert!"
"Nabiki!" Ranma cried as he set Kasumi upright, then vaulted back up the stairs in a single bound even as his iinazuke turned and stormed back to her room. He had almost managed to catch up to her when she slammed the door quite literally in his face, stunning him slightly and giving him a nosebleed.
Akane turned from watching Ranma stagger backwards from the impact of that encounter, then looked down at Kasumi...and only then caught sight of two other figures standing near the bottom of the stairs, and by straining her neck and glancing over the edge she discovered both of their fathers were there, hers wearing a wash basin that was partially draped over his head, Genma once again having reverted to the body of a panda, and both men holding their bathing toiletries in both hands.
"Uh oh," Akane suddenly had a sneaking suspicions that there was more to the scene than she had judged on first impression.
"Saotome-kun," her father drawled slightly.
The panda held up his ever-present sign, which read, "Yes, Tendo-kun?"
"It's back to the bath house for us both, I'm afraid," Soun drolly noted.
The panda turned his sign around and it now said, "Right."
"Bath house?" Akane looked questioningly at Kasumi.
"That's right," her older sister said, "The furo is in need of repairs...I was hoping to fetch a plumber."
"And Ranma...?" Akane asked.
"Oh, he surprised me," Kasumi replied, "I don't think he even saw me coming..."
"Aw, C'mon, Nabiki!" Ranma was pleading against the door blocking his path, "Give me a chance to explain already, will ya?"
"Go away, we don't want any!" Nabiki shot back in stubborn resolution.
"Hooboy," Akane sighed, belatedly realizing that the job of playing Cupid was not everything it was cut out to be, and that she had her work ahead of her if she were going to help these two get closer together...
Continued.
Comments/Criticisms/Anime Courtship Protocols: shadowmane
Ranma has a double-confrontation with Tatewaki while Nabiki considers ways in which to turn a profit, and Akane gives Ranma a proposition that she hopes he won't refuse while revealing to him the truth behind her own unrequited passion in: "A Taste for Roses," or "I Love You/I Hate You!" Be there!
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