Reasons Against Denial Ch. 3

Warnings/disclaimers: still the same

Earlier this week, Draco had sent out two almost identical letters. The only differences had been in the first and last couple words. One was addressed "Dear Mother," the other "Father," and the end of each said "I sent a letter to Mum/Dad too." The part that was the same, however, read:

A lot has happened in the past month. I have some news for you that I hope you will take graciously, but it may come as a shock. Then again, it hadn't for most of the students/professors here, so maybe not. First of all, I'm gay. I've known this for almost two years, but had decided to not act on it- ignore it. That's no longer an option however, as of my second piece of news; I have a boyfriend. You know him; everyone does. It's Harry Potter. Whatever qualms you may have with him, I like him. He treats me well, how you'd want your significant other to treat you.

I do hope you'll reply, though don't expect your opinion to sway mine.

Sincerely, Draco.

Now, at breakfast in the Great Hall, he held two response letters in his hand. He could feel Harry's worried eyes on him from the Gryffindor table. Blaise, Pansy, and Theo were all looking at him too. He took a deep breath, picked the one that looked like it was from his mother, hoped he was right, and opened it.

Dear Draco,

I had guessed you were homosexual since this past summer, but I had never expected you to act on your feelings. But, if that's how you want to live your life, there's nothing I can do to stop you. I'm glad Harry treats you well; you deserve nothing less.

Your father, though, will probably react quite differently.

Be strong, Narcissa.

Draco let out a breath he hadn't realized he had been holding. He even smiled a little- his mother always signed her name, never "Your Mother" or anything like that. He didn't really know why, but it was normal, comforting. He looked at the letter from his father, slowly picking it up. He unfolded it and read:

I have rewritten this many times, but I cannot think of how to address you, for you are no son of mine. You are a living sin and a disgrace. Not only have you dishonored the Malfoy name, you have made it worse by choosing to be with Harry Potter, the very boy who has sentenced me to death in this cell. The boy who stood against everything I fought for. You have shattered any shred or respect I had left for you. You are nothing to me.

Lucius Malfoy.

Draco had expected this, prepared for it, but that didn't stop the tears from coming to his eyes. He grabbed his mother's letter and half-ran out of the Great Hall, refusing to cry in front of everyone. He could hear Harry calling his name behind him, but he kept going. He left, heading subconsciously for the lake. He was walking now though, and Harry had caught up to him. He ran up behind his boyfriend of a week and a half and wrapped his arms around his waist. He rested his head carefully on the blonde's shoulder.

"Let me see," he whispered, his breath tickling Draco's ear. Draco shook his head, tightening his grip on the letters in his hands. "Dray..." He softly kissed Draco's neck. "I can't comfort you if I don't know what's wrong."

"What do you think is wrong?" Draco cried, turning around to face Harry, whose arms were still wrapped firmly around his waist. The tears on Draco's cheeks and the pain in his eyes killed Harry. Gently, he took the letters from his hand and read them silently.

Whatever hate he had felt toward Lucius Malfoy before had multiplied itself by at least ten. He pulled Draco into him, holding him close, wanting to take all the pain away from him. He slid the letters into Draco's back pocket, smiling slightly at Draco's gasp of surprise when his hand brushed against his arse. One hand stayed around his waist, the other in his hair. Both Draco's hands were around Harry's waist, clutching to his shirt as if his life depended on it. His face was hidden in Harry's neck. He could feel Draco's body shaking as he cried silently.

Draco didn't really know why he was crying. His father had never been very, well, fatherly. Or nice at all, for that matter. He had known Lucius wouldn't accept the fact that he was gay. He supposed that somewhere in the back of his mind he had hoped his father would accept him anyway. That maybe he wasn't ALL bad. But that hope had been destroyed with one simple letter.

That's why he was crying, he realized. He no longer had that hope. And it hurt. It hurt to know his father really did hate him now, if he hadn't already before.

He felt Harry walk him back into something. /A rock/ he thought vaguely. Harry gently pulled them to the ground, never letting go of Draco. Draco barely heard him though, as he said his name. It sounded like he was on the other side of a very thick wall.

"Draco, please," Harry said. His voice sounded so sad, so desperate.

Draco opened his eyes and looked at his boyfriend. There were a thousand emotions fighting for control on the brunets face. Anger. Sorrow. Concern. Sympathy. Frustration.

Love.

Draco could tell he was trying to look strong, be there for him, keep his emotions in check. But it wasn't working. There was a rain cloud, just above them, almost like in the cartoons. Draco watched Harry loose the fight with his magic; felt the rain come pouring down. It washed the tears from Draco's cheeks, but made it impossible for Harry to see through his glasses. Draco carefully took them off, setting them on the rock at their backs.

"I'm sorry," Harry said, leaning his forehead against Draco's. "For the rain. For your father. For not really knowing how to help you through this."

"You know," Draco said, hating that Harry felt like this was somehow his fault, "I've never been kissed in the rain."

"I bet I can fix that," Harry replied, a small smile tugging at his lips. He grabbed the back of Draco's neck and kissed him softly. Slowly, the kiss escalated, becoming more heated, but none less passionate. Neither of them noticed when Harry checked his magic and the rain stopped. They didn't notice anything but each other.

Until they heard the wolf-whistle from in front of them. They pulled apart hastily, and looked up to see Blaise, looking amused.

"I'm glad you're feeling a bit better, Drake, but Headmistress McGonagall probably doesn't appreciate you two snogging each other's brains out in the middle of the grounds. I came out to tell you guys that you're going to be late for Potions if you don't hurry up. And why are you soaking wet?"

"Harry had a magic break-down and made it pour," Draco replied lightly, making Harry blush. They both still had an arm around the others waist, stabilizing each other.

"Well, taking these new conditions into account, you're definitely going to be late if you've got to change," he said, turning on his heels and leaving the two boys alone again.

Harry smiled. "So how was your first kiss in the rain?"

Draco smiled back, but it didn't really reach his eyes. "Everything I would have hoped it to be," he replied. "C'mon, we're going to be late," he said, pulling Harry up to his feet.

Harry put his glasses back on after clearing them with a spell. He grabbed Draco's wrist before he could go anywhere. "Are you alright?" he asked seriously.

Draco hesitated. "Not really... But I will be." Harry looked at him for a while before nodding silently. They took each other's hand, fingers entwining as they walked back to the castle. Harry kissed Draco's cheek where they had to split up, but Draco just pulled him with him. "You can change in our room; it's closer," he explained.

"Thanks," Harry said, smiling.

Both boys houses had gotten used to the other going in and out of their Common Room, so no one really cared when they walked in together, still hand-in-hand. They walked up to Draco's dorm, almost running into Theo, who was walking out. They nodded at each other in passing, Theo with a look of understanding on his face. Harry closed the door behind them, letting go of Draco's hand to do so. He was busy picking out clothes for the two of them anyway.

"We really should keep some of our own clothes in each other's dorms," Harry said, coming up behind him. "Not that I don't like wearing your clothes- they all smell like you." They had each worn the others clothes on a few occasions, as neither of them liked sleeping alone anymore.

"We should," Draco agreed, handing Harry his pile.

He reached into his back pocket. "Oh! I probably ruined-" Harry started.

Draco pulled the letters out, dry. "I thought about that when I saw your rain cloud," he said. "I may not be happy with what they say, but I wasn't about to let you destroy them," he teased, putting the letters in his trunk. "Now go get dressed!"

Harry went to change in the bathroom, while Draco just locked the door and changed in his room. He always finished before Harry anyway. "If you don't hurry up, I'm going to leave you here!" he called, running a comb through his hair.

He heard Harry behind him, but didn't expect him to ruffle up his hair. "Don't fix it," Harry said, cutting off any complaints with a quick kiss. "The 'just showered' look is hot."

"I didn't just shower though; you made it pour on me!" Draco retorted, but didn't fix his hair. Instead he dragged Harry out the door, heading for Potions.

They walked in just in time, sitting together. They usually sat with their respective friends furring classes, like before they were dating, but not today. The memory of the letter was still fresh in their minds and they needed each other to balance their emotions. Harry and his anger, and Draco his pain. Both their frustration.

They went through the day like that- always by the others side, almost always holding hands. They only split up for lunch. And supper, which they were at now. No one had said anything about his parents' letters. Instead, they were trying really hard to include him in happy, carefree conversations he didn't want to partake in.

Both Draco and Harry looked up constantly at the other when they weren't looking. After he finished, which was rather quickly, as he didn't have much of an appetite, Draco politely excused himself. He looked up at Harry, knowing he was already watching him, then at the door, and got up. He knew Harry would follow, because that's just what he did. Draco heard him come up beside him, and held out his hand, which Harry gladly took.

"I don't want to go to the Common Room, okay?" Draco asked.

"That's fine. Where do you want to go instead? Outside... Room of Requirement?" Harry responded, not fully understanding Draco meant for the night.

"Do you think they'd let us sleep outside?"

"Probably not," Harry admitted, realizing what he meant.

"The Astronomy Tower then, that way we're still under the stars."

"How romantic," Harry teased, squeezing Draco's hand.

Draco blushed. "I didn't..."

"I know," Harry replied, smiling.

They walked the rest of the way in silence, neither one wanting to talk about anything just yet. They looked out over the grounds. Harry held him in a hug from behind, his chin resting on Draco's shoulder. Draco figured it was Harry's was of proving he was taller, if just by a little bit.

"Are you okay?" he asked quietly.

"No," Draco replied, his voice barely audible.

"You've been strong all day," Harry whispered. "You don't have to be strong anymore. I've got you; I'm here."

"That's why I can be strong." Draco tilted his head do that it rested against Harry's. "Because you've got me."

But he could feel the tears in his eyes again. All the emotions he had held in all day hit him like a tidal wave. The pain. The betrayal. The lost sense of hope. The frustration. Everything. The tears rolled down his cheeks and he cried. Again, he turned around in Harry's arms and hid his face in the other boys neck. Harry held him close and just let him cry, soothing him.

He could almost feel a physical pain seeing Draco so unhappy, but he wasn't really sure of what he should do. He could feel the hate and anger towards Lucius bubbling inside him. He fought hard to keep his magic in check, but he could feel it fighting back. His emotions were strong and he wasn't sure if he could do it. "Draco," he whispered, seeing a gold spark fly from his finger tip. But it was a little too late.

Draco looked up to see a little plotted plant behind Harry catch fire. He pulled out his wand and put it out, putting his wand back. This all happened within a couple of seconds. Hands free again, he lifted them to cup Harry's face. His eyes were closed in concentration, trying to control his emotions, his magic. His hands were tight on Draco's hips. There were still sparks flying from his fingertips in various colors, but they didn't hurt. A couple tears were still falling down Draco's cheeks. He brushed his thumbs over Harry's cheek bones, trying to sooth him. Slowly, the sparks faded and Harry opened his eyes.

"Sorry," he whispered, sounding very much like he meant it.

"Don't take this the wrong way or anything," Draco replied, "but why does your magic snap? I'm the one crying..."

"My emotions are high." At Draco's questioning look, he continued. "I'm angry with your father for not accepting you. I'm frustrated because I'm not sure how to help you through this. Plus my magic keeps snapping when I should be comforting you. And it breaks my heart to know someone has hurt you enough to make you cry." He finished quietly and placed a light kiss on Draco's forehead. "Are you alright?"

Draco hesitated. He wasn't really sure is he was alright, to be totally honest. After a bit more thinking, he looked up at Harry, meeting his eyes. "I'll need you for a while. I know you keep saying you don't know how to help me, but you're doing fine, really. I just need you to hold me," he said quietly.

If possible, Harry pulled him closer. "I can do that."

They maneuvered with each other so that Harry sat against a wall, Draco's head in his lap. And they just sat there. Draco looked up at the stars staring to come out. He loved looking at the stars; they were so bright and beautiful.

"Do you really want to spend the night here?" Harry asked after a while.

Draco had intended to at first, but he had relaxed, so he was okay with leaving. Anyway, the floor was terribly uncomfortable. "No, it's alright. Room of Requirement?"

"Sounds good," Harry replied. But neither of them got up for a while longer. When they did, again they walked in silence. It was already after hours, if just, so they shouldn't really have been out anyway. Not that that had ever stopped either of them before.

Whenever they walked in together now, the Room always mixed their house colors- red and silver, or green and gold. Today it was green and gold.

"Shower first?" Harry asked.

"Yeah; I might actually take longer than you today with so much on my mind."

Harry kissed him softly. "Just don't take too long though."

Draco smiled. "I won't," he promised, returning the kiss.

Their bathrooms, however, we're always their own house colors- no mix there. Both boys actually took longer than usual, but Draco still finished first. He dried off and pulled on a pair of boxers, then went to sit on the bed the Room had conjured. He closed his eyes and tried to clear his mind; to relax. His mother was okay with him and Harry. None of his friends had said anything against it (although sometimes Draco thought this was because Harry would put anyone who did in the Infirmary for a month. He really was quite protective). It was just his father who didn't. /He can't do anything about it/ he reminded himself.

He didn't hear Harry come up next to him, but he felt the bed sink a little with his weight. Draco was sitting cross-legged and Harry sat behind him, wrapping his arms around his chest. In response, Draco put his arms over Harry's, but didn't open his eyes. He could feel Harry's bare chest rise and fall as he breathed, firm against his own back. Harry's chin rested on his shoulder, his hair occasionally dripping down Draco's neck.

"Dray," Harry whispered, his breath tickling Draco's cheek.

"Hmm?" he mumbled.

"Look at me." Draco opened his eyes and turned so that he could meet Harry's. They were full of love and concern. "You should get some sleep; we have classes tomorrow."

Draco sighed. He wanted to just sit here forever in Harry's arms. He nodded, kissing Harry. "Thanks."

"Anything I can do to help," Harry replied honestly. He wanted to protect Draco from any and all potential pain, but knew he couldn't. He had already been through so much... Harry absent-mindedly traced the faded Dark Mark on the blonde's wrist. Draco stiffened a little, but quickly relaxed again. Harry did that a lot for some unknown reason. Maybe one day Draco would ask him about it. He also seemed to prefer to stand/sit behind Draco, and hold him that way. Not that he minded.

"Okay," he said after a while.

"Okay what?" Harry asked.

"We can get some sleep now," he replied, turning over and pulling the sheets up. They lay facing each other, legs intertwined. Both boys fell asleep to the sound of the others breathing.

The end.

A/N: I don't really like the end of this one, I feel like I just ended it...

I didn't do the Weasley's reactions because I imagined them all to be like Ron's, and that would be kind of repetitive...

I don't really know how to continue this, but if you have an idea, feel free to review/ PM me. I might do their first sex scene? Keep in mind I've never written sex before, so it'd be mild... Anyway, ideas?

And thanks so much to all of you who reviewed! I try to PM you with a response as soon as I get the email saying you have.. So yeah. Thanks again, it really does mean a lot! I smile every time I get one :)

Oh! And to anyone who searched Drarry, completed, sorry; I keep adding to it, I know it's not really done... It started as a one-shot...