"I thought sleeping with the boss would get me off clinic duty."
Cuddy spun round at the sound of House's voice. Clocking the sight of his fellows behind him, she decided to pretend he was joking.
"You could be dead and I'd still make your corpse diagnose the sniffles. Now quit your sexual harassment or I'll double your hours."
"Damn. It appears nice Cuddy was a hallucination again." He sighed dramatically and picked up a file before striding in to exam room 1.
"You're here because you feel tired?" He asked the patient in there patronisingly. "How much sleep do you get a night? Wait, no, don't answer. Judging by the bags under your eyes, I'd say most definitely not enough." He wrote a prescription for mild sleeping pills and left the room, leaving a bewildered patient in his wake.
"That's me done for the day, boss!" He yelled as he walked back to his office before stopping abruptly.
Backtracking, he mentally slapped himself for not noticing.
"Love the shirt, doctor Cuddy! I always knew you were a man secretly!" he yelled at the same volume as before, across the clinic. She buried her face in her hands as a reply, swearing revenge.
"I am in love." House was sitting at Wilson's desk, his feet on it and his cane propped under his chin. "Seriously."
"Of course you are. Just like when you paid for lunch last week and the credit card wasn't mine, and your name is definitely James Wilson too."
House pouted, feigning innocence, before repeating himself. "I am in love, for real, no joke."
"Who's the... lucky gal?" Wilson asked.
"Not a gal. Nor of the female persuasion either. Did you know clowns have their own gender?"
Wilson raised his eyebrow, and sent House a look that registered a four on the Wilson's-encouraging-or-pitying-looks factor.
"Ok, it's a woman, but I can't say." House stood up and tried to leave, but Wilson followed him.
"That means it's someone we both know-"
"Déjà vu."
"Shut up. It's also probably someone we both know." He stopped, tilting his head sideways while House limped ahead.
"It's not every day you see that." He muttered, then returned to the safety of his office.
Hi. I was trying to update this every other day, but sleep called. I will update again in the next three days though. Hope you like it?