Youtube playlist is updated. Listen at youtube dot com slash playlist?list=PLWN8Uu8V5RChvSaDEQglOmBy_l1hkfnm8

Emma tries to watch the "Fuck You" cover again that night but it is no longer available. She has a strong suspicion that Killian hadn't wanted the video posted in the first place and it only makes her feel a stronger kinship with him. Her mind flashes to the video Neal had posted online shortly after he had cut off communication-they had never technically broken up. The situations weren't exactly the same. Killian's video exposed his heart while her video exposed her body.

When Neal had requested a strip tease video she had assumed it was for his own personal pleasure. He was her boyfriend, she loved him and had no reason to question his motives. It had never occurred to her that he would post it to make money; thinking he could capitalize on her Youtube stardom. Of course she hadn't known how deep in debt he was and how afraid he was of his father discovering he had squandered all his college money. She learned all this later after the video was posted, after she (and some dedicated followers) got it taken down, after David-Mary Margaret's boyfriend and her knight in shining armor-had hacked Neal's laptop to wipe the video, after her heart was broken. Learning the reason why Neal had done it hadn't eased the pain or made it any less a violation of privacy.

Realizing that Killian and her might have more than a few things in common makes Emma feel guilty. Anna had accused her of being angry and personally attacking him. Emma was starting to think she was right. It takes most of the day but she finally decides to make amends. She logs in as Swan, a little too stubborn to reveal herself completely, and leaves another comment. It isn't much, just a reply to his first reply but it is a sincere apology. She doesn't know if he will even see it but she feels better having done it. Before she closes the window she subscribes to his channel.

Emma would never admit it but as the months pass she becomes a genuine fan of his music. Watching each video as soon as they post and usually several times in the first day. When he cuts an EP, a mix of his covers and original songs, she is probably one of the first ones to buy it. She never gets over how intensely attracted she is to him. Every time he smiles into the screen she feels her stomach flip or her chest tighten. She knows she has a full blown fangirl crush when he does a duet with a blonde female Youtuber called "Tinkerbell" and envy flares hot and bright in her chest. It doesn't help that their cover of "This I Promise You" is so heartfelt it almost brings tears to her eyes.

Sometimes Emma wonders if Killian watches her videos. In late April she mentions how much she loves the song "What A Wonderful World" and a week later he posts a cover of it. Emma watches him playing the ukelele in a blue plaid button down with a proud smirk on his face and she actually blushes. When she mentions that she will be in California for a few weeks he posts a mash-up cover of "Isn't She Lovely" and "California Gurls". The tune is stuck in her head for days and makes her grin every time she hears it. Then there is one of his original songs that references a golden haired beauty and Emma fantasizes it is about her and hopes it isn't about "Tinkerbell". He never mentions Ugly Duckling in his videos but the coincidences are striking and Emma can't escape the little voice in her head. A voice that grows louder when he announces that he is going to VidCon just a week after she announced her own attendance.

"Are you excited for Vidcon this year?" Mary Margaret asks one evening when the whole group is out to dinner.

"Yeah. It will be exhausting but it's always fun. Meeting other Youtubers and the fans is great." Emma replies eagerly. She misses the look that passes between David and Mary Margaret.

"Anyone in particular you are looking forward to seeing?" Elsa asks and this time Emma hears the note of curiosity. She glances up from her plate suspiciously.

"Why?"

Anna lets out an exaggerated sigh. "Killian. We all want to know if you are going to meet Killian."

"Anna!" Elsa and Mary Margaret chorus as Kris and David chuckle.

"What!" Anna protests "We all know you have a gigantic crush on him. And who can blame you, he is dead sexy."

"I am right here!" Kris proclaims with mock affront but Anna just keeps talking.

"And he will be at Vidcon. Don't look so surprised we all watch his videos, not that we need to since you ALWAYS have them playing. So are you planning on actually talking to him or what?"

By the time Anna finishes Emma is bright red all the way to the roots of her hair. She thought she had been so careful, she thought nobody had guessed at her embarrassing and complete reversal of feelings toward Killian Jones. She thinks about denying it but when she looks around the table at her friends she finds she desperately wants their advice. She keeps her eyes firmly on the table as the words she has been turning over in her mind come tumbling out.

"I don't know. I mean what would I say? 'Sorry I devoted a whole video to ranting about you. I jumped to conclusions because I have issues trusting men' or maybe 'I love your videos and your music and your accent and maybe you.' I am sure that will go over real well." the laughs of her friends pull her up short. She looks up and shoots them a pleading look. "I'm serious!"

Once they compose themselves her friends actually offer some solid advice. Elsa tells her that the past is in the past. Mary Margaret encourages her to have hope. David reminds her that anything worth having is worth fighting for. Anna enthuses that she thinks Killian could be "the one" and Kris vehemently disagrees. He advises Emma to just be herself and not rush into anything. Not one of them think it is crazy that she likes a man she has never met. And they all agree that he would be crazy not to like her back. By the end of the evening Emma has already started to act on Mary Margaret's advice; she lets a little seed of hope start to grow.

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As Killian walks into the California heat outside the Tom Bradley Terminal at LAX he can't keep the smile from his face. Despite the noise and the jet lag and the long drive to the Anaheim Convention Center he is bouncing in excitement.

The last few months have been a whirlwind. The bump in subscribers from Ugly Duckling was just the beginning. His growing fan base had opened up new and exciting doors; collaborations with other Youtubers, using the Youtube studio in London, recording and selling his EP, a possible tour on the horizon, and now attending VidCon. Killian has to keep reminding himself that this is actually his life now.

He had planned to take the shuttle to Anaheim but he decides to splurge and take a taxi instead. He asks the driver to take him on the scenic route and isn't disappointed as they drive down the Pacific Coast Highway. He stares out at the crowded beaches, the sun glittering in the sunshine, everyone walking around casually in their swimwear. He can't help the lyric that floats through his head

"You could travel the world. But nothing comes close to the golden coast" He smiles thinking of the mash-up he had done with that song after being inspired by Emma's trip. And just like that he is thinking about her and the fact that he might see her, in person, this weekend. His stomach twists uncomfortably at the prospect.

His crush on Ugly Duckling had not disappeared with her rude video; a fact that frustrated Liam. It still hurt that she had misjudged him but the sting of her words had been swallowed up by all the opportunities her video had brought into his life. It also helped that a few months back she had made a video about the perils of assumptions and snap judgements. He knew it wasn't an apology to him but he liked to imagine that it meant she might give him another chance; a chance to do what he wasn't entirely sure.

He wanted to meet her. His aspirations hadn't really gone beyond that simple desire; at least not consciously (his subconscious was a different matter). Killian knew that in the middle of the 20,000 people at VidCon he was unlikely to accidentally run into her. He had said as much to Liam, when he had asked about the possibility of talking to "that ugly lass" (Liam had not completely forgiven Emma).

"Well brother. If you want to meet her I think you should make it happen. Remember a man unwilling to fight for what he wants-"

"Deserves what he gets." Killian finished the phrase with a sigh. "I know brother."

Liam had narrowed his eyes before nodding, ending the conversation. Killian had taken Liam's advice to heart and promised himself he would find a way to talk to her. From her Youtube video he knew what panels she was attending and when her meet and greets were scheduled. Although Killian wanted a more casual encounter he was prepared to stand in line for the chance to have even a short conversation with her.

As the cab pulls up to the Anaheim Hilton Killian runs his hands through his hair, his jet lag starting to hit him. He is already glad that he came a day early. Check-in is relatively painless and he is soon making his way across the airy lobby to the bank of elevators. He stops next to a tall brunette with bright red highlights in her hair, her face buried in her phone, headphones in her ears. She barely looks up when the doors open and they shuffle inside.

As the doors start to close a voice calls. "Wait!" and an arm shoots through the gap. The doors slide back open to reveal Emma, the Ugly Duckling herself, rifling through her purse. She is even more breathtaking in person and Killian feels the air evaporate around him and his body temperature spike. But before she can look up from her purse, before he can try to make eye contact, or even think of something clever to say, the brunette lets out a squeal.

"Oh my God you are Killian Jones!" The girl practically shouts. Killian feels his cheeks flush with embarrassment and from the corner of his eye he sees Emma's head jerk up in surprise. "I love your music!" She yanks out one of her earbuds and holds it up to him, stepping closer. He can hear his own song, the song he wrote about Emma, floating out. "This song is basically on repeat in my head." the girl's voice settles to a normal volume with her headphones out.

Killian gives her a smile. "Thanks lass. That is my favorite too." he doesn't really know what else to say.

"I'm Ruby by the way. I make videos. Duh, right, it's Vidcon! You probably haven't seen any of them. They are all about relationship and dating advice. Stuff you probably don't need help with. I saw the hot collab you did with Tinkerbell." She talks fast and punctuates her words with her hands.

"Well…" He casts a side glance at Emma. She is intently focusing on her phone, no doubt trying to ignore the whole conversation.

"Can I get a photo?" she holds up her phone and Killian can only nod. His brain still not able to catch up with the situation. Ruby turns to Emma. "Will you take our picture?"

Emma looks up and Killian doesn't think he is imagining a slight flush to her cheeks.

"Oh wow! You're Ugly Duckling!" Ruby's voice rises an octave. "I…you are like my idol. She makes videos too." Ruby turns to explain.

"I know." is all Killian can think to say.

Ruby's gaze bounces between them. "This is already the best VidCon ever!" Emma grins at her enthusiasm and Killian swears the entire elevator grows lighter and warmer. "I want to get a picture with both of you!"

Killian looks at Emma and their eyes meet. There is a pull in his stomach and a strange feeling of familiarity. He has stared at her face a million times but this is the first time she has stared back. He feels paralyzed and is almost glad when Ruby breaks the moment.

"Ok. Get close." Emma and Killian obediently shuffle closer to Ruby and look up into the phone she is holding out. Killian wraps his arm around Ruby's shoulders and his hand brushes Emma's shoulder. They all freeze as the phone flashes. The elevator doors open on Killian's floor and he can't decide if he is relieved or upset.

"My stop." he says as he steps away and grabs his suitcase and guitar case.

"Oh. It was so nice to meet you! I will tweet you the photo!"

"Thanks." Killian says as he runs his hand through his hair and steps out. He turns as the doors begin to close and catches Emma watching him "Hope to see you around." he calls but the doors shut before he can see her reaction.

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As the elevator doors close on Killian Emma lets out a whoosh of breath. She is still in shock at seeing him in person. He is a lot taller than she had expected, his voice somehow deeper, his hair adorably disheveled. He is impossibly more attractive in person than he is on screen. A sentiment Ruby shares as soon as the elevator begins to rise again.

"Oh my God he is so hot. Like ten times hotter in person. How is that possible?" she mock fans herself "Sorry to get all crazy fangirl on you. But you are both so amazing."

Emma smiles. "No it's fine. I totally understand."

"Thanks! I swear I am usually pretty normal. I am just so excited and a little jet lagged. I came all the way from Maine on a cheap flight with a million connections."

"Sounds awful! You know I lived in Maine as a kid." From there the conversation follows the regular path about places they both know, the weather, and things they enjoy about the 'Pine Tree State'. They continue to talk as the doors open and they discover their rooms are only a few doors down from each other. Before they part Ruby invites Emma to join her and some friends for drinks and dinner in a few hours. Emma agrees and Ruby promises to pick her up before she leaves.

Once alone in her room Emma flops face down on her king sized bed and screams into her pillow. She had seen him, breathed the same air, even felt his hand brush her shoulder but she hadn't talked to him. She replays the encounter in her mind. The way he flushed at Ruby's compliments, the way his eyes locked on to hers with an intensity she had never experienced, the way his hand grazed her shoulder and sent a shiver down her spine. But it is his short "I know." when Ruby mentioned her videos that haunts her. Because of course he knew,she had made a whole video mocking him, a video that he probably despised her for making. He certainly hadn't complimented her or been in raptures like Ruby. In fact the more Emma thinks about it the more she wonders if his intense gaze was one of loathing. She replays the scene again and realizes her thoughts are beginning to loop and so with a groan she rolls over and off the bed. She grabs her toiletries from her suitcase and jumps into the rather luxurious shower. She hopes some hot water will clear her head.

Twenty minutes later she is wrapped in a towel rifling through her clothes, and her phone chimes. She checks it and is shocked by her notifications. Elsa and Mary Margaret had both texted and Anna had sent three Snapchats. Emma doesn't open any of them and just calls Anna. Putting it on speaker as she finishes getting ready.

"How did it happen! Tell me everything! Wait I am going to put you on speaker so everyone can hear." Anna screeches into the phone without preamble.

"What are you talking about?"

Emma can practically hear Anna rolling her eyes. "Emmmmaaaa! Don't mess with us! You have been in California for less than 3 hours and you are already taking photos with Killian Jones!"

"How did you-?"

"It's on your twitter!"

Emma launches her twitter app and sure enough right at the top is the photo from the elevator. She pauses to appreciate how good he looks even in bad elevator lighting. His smile seems genuine if a little subdued. Ruby is grinning like a fool and Emma's smile doesn't quite reach her eyes. She groans.

"Are you there? Tell us what happened!" this time it's Mary Margaret demanding. With a sigh Emma launches into her story. When she finishes it's Elsa who speaks first.

"So you didn't even talk to him?"

"What could I say? Plus it was hard to get a word in with Ruby."

"Emma! Emma!" Anna pipes up. "Check his twitter! That Ruby girl just invited him to go out."

Emma looks and sure enough Ruby had tweeted him a second time

" UglyDuckling and a group of us going out. Meet in the lobby in 30?"

Emma feels her breath pick up. She hadn't expected a second chance to come so soon. She certainly hadn't expected that chance to include a whole night of opportunities to talk and get to know him.

"Emma. Please tell me you are going to meet up with them." Anna's voice is a mixture of pleading and scolding.

"Yes. I am going. I am getting ready right now." she snaps.

"Emma." Mary Margaret's gentle voice floats from the speaker. "Don't worry. It is going to be fine. He is going to fall head over heels for you. I know it."

"Thanks." Emma doesn't really feel any better but she appreciates the effort. "I gotta get dressed. I'll call you later."

"You better!" Elsa warns and Emma can almost see her other friends nodding in unison. Emma shakes her head but her heart is glowing with affection for them. Even if she made a fool of herself in front of Killian tonight she knew they would be right there to lift her back up.

She changes her clothes four times, grateful she had let Elsa talk her into bringing extra outfits. ("Believe me Emma there is nothing worse than being stuck in the same dress for days because you didn't bring enough clothes!") She settles on a dark wash pair of jeans and a lacy grey tank top paired with a red leather jacket. She decides to leave her hair down with a slight wave and wear only a little makeup. She is aiming for casual sexy and she feels reasonably satisfied with the results. Ruby knocks on her door just as she is pulling on her shoes.

Ruby is sporting a short black leather skirt, sheer red button up, and a black sun hat Emma wishes she could pull off. They exchange compliments and head for the elevators. Emma doesn't mention Killian but he is her only thought as they drop down to the lobby. Her stomach is in knots but she is determined, no matter what, to actually have a conversation with him.

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Author's Note: So I have never been to Vidcon (but I have stayed in that Hilton a few times). Excuse any inaccuracies. This got long so I broke it up. So this will be a four parter now. Thanks for all the lovely follows, favs, and reviews!