Unforgettable Nights, Unforgivable Mistakes

Chapter 3: Heartbroken

Emily stirred in her sleep and felt her head exploding and her whole body in pain; she didn't want to open her eyes, but the bright sun blinded her and the dryness of her mouth woke her from her peaceful slumber. She shouldn't have drunk as much as she did the night before...she knew better than that because she had many bad experiences with tequila and whisky but none of that stopped her. As she became more conscious and rubbed her eyes, she finally was aware of the heavy arm snaked around her midsection. She tried to move but she couldn't, and when she finally opened her eyes, she was in her bed in the hotel room with the soft sheet covering her naked frame and next to her with his arm wrapped around her was the stoic Aaron Hotchner, naked as well. Emily gasped as the crude reality hit her body. 'Dammit' she cursed herself internally. The slow images of the night before started running through her head...she had slept with her boss! She moved slowly out of the bed being very careful not to wake him; she covered her naked frame with one of the bed covers and carefully, without making a single noise, stepped inside the bathroom.

What the fuck was wrong with her...how could she have possibly slept with him! This was so wrong...she should have never done this...how could she have been so stupid as to sleep with him...this clearly was a mistake for him, and when he wakes up, he was going to regret being with her! Emily quietly turned on the water in the sink and rinsed her face and brushed her teeth as heavy tears streamed down her face, she should never have slept with him. She quietly stepped out of the bathroom and quickly changed into a pair of jeans and a sweater. She didn't even take a shower; she was in such a rush to leave that a shower would have to wait. Emily quickly collected all her belongings and her suitcases and left the hotel room in a rush. She didn't want to see him when he woke up because she didn't want to see the regret on his face, and she wanted to save their embarrassment when he told her that whatever had happened between them had clearly been a mistake. She rushed outside the hotel to call a cab needing to get out of there as soon as possible. Emily knew that she was acting like a child, but she didn't think she could face him after what they had done. She hailed a cab, and after the cabbie helped get her suitcases in the trunk, they left for the airport.

As the cab was driving toward the airport, Emily couldn't stop the fresh tears that were rolling down her cheeks, as the images of the night of passion they had shared came into her mind...how she had come to this place, she wasn't sure. Yes, she had probably fantasized endless times about having sex with her boss, even though she hated him, but she never thought it would actually happen. Okay, yes, she hated him, but he was a very attractive man, he was a great leader and an excellent father to his son, Jack. Emily didn't know much about the failure of his marriage, but she knew that he was totally devoted to his son and to his job; he was an amazing leader and a great role model. If she didn't have to hate him, she would probably love him. She wasn't even sure anymore why she had started hating him, but at some point, she had. Last night had been amazing, and even if she was drunk, she could still remember the way his hands felt on her skin, the way his soft lips felt against her mouth and her most intimate parts. Emily closed her eyes and the image of him on top of her kissing her while he moved slowly inside her came to her mind, it looked so real, so passionate, almost as if he was not drunk, and he had really wanted her. She had experienced one of the most intense orgasm she had ever had in her life; in fact, no man had ever made her feel the way Aaron Hotchner had, but she knew that for him, it had just been alcohol and a mistake.

She wiped her eyes as fresh tears rolled down her face. This is exactly what happened every time she got her heart involved. She would give herself completely, and she would end up heartbroken. Emily should have know better than this, how could she have been so stupid as to drink that much and end up sleeping with her boss! And worse yet, her feelings had gotten exposed. She had given her self completely to him the night before, and she was very sure he had seen that in her eyes...how she had come to this place she didn't know. Somewhere along the way, she had found herself attracted to her superior, and she had buried those feelings deep inside her heart. But last night, those feelings had been exposed and now she felt terrible, he would probably laugh about her, and brag to everyone about how he had managed to take her to bed. Thankfully, she would never have to see him or anyone that was around him again, since in a few hours she would be flying to London, and she could forget that this night ever happened.

Aaron woke up as the hangover started hitting his body. He moved his arm searching for the warm body of the beautiful brunette but he couldn't find her. He opened his eyes slowly and realized Emily wasn't in bed with him any longer. He sat up in the bed, listening for the shower in the bathroom which he couldn't hear, so he wasn't sure if she was taking a shower. He got out of bed putting on his boxers; maybe he could order room service, and they could spend the last couple of hours she had in the country in bed talking and learning a little about one another. He needed to tell her how he felt about her, what the night they had just spent had meant to him, and that never in his life had he ever imagined he would have such an amazing night with her. Last night had been one of the most wonderful nights of his life, no woman had ever made love to him the way Emily had, not even Haley when they were first married; he knew he had fought his feelings for her for a very long time, but he just couldn't anymore; last night, he had realized how he truly felt about her, he had finally understood why he had pushed her away from him...he had deep feelings for her and he'd had them for a long time; but how could he not? Emily was utterly beautiful, she was more than a capable agent, and one of the best ones he had ever worked with, she was kind and a wonderful human being, and after the night he had shared with her, he had realize that he was crazy about her.

He walked toward the bathroom and knocked on the door softly.

"Emily, are you in there?" No answer.

He slowly opened the door, and he was met with the surprise that she wasn't in the bathroom...then finally, realization came to his mind. The suitcases that had been there the night before were no longer there; in fact, there were no signs that Emily had ever been there at all. This couldn't be possible; Emily wouldn't have just left like that without saying goodbye, without saying a word to him. He walked toward the nightstand and picked up his cellphone dialing her number, and just as he had feared, it went straight to voicemail. His heart began beating very fast...she didn't, she couldn't have done this. He reached for the hotel room phone, dialing the front desk, and a very polite gentleman answered the phone.

"Hi, I'm Aaron Hotchner, I'm looking for my friend who was staying in this room." He asked, stammering, since he wasn't sure what to say.

"Miss Prentiss checked out this morning, is there anything else I can do for you, sir?" The gentlemen asked. Aaron took a very long time to answer...

"Um, no, thank you." He said, hanging up the phone. He felt his heart shattering into a million pieces, why had she left just like that, without saying a word to him without saying goodbye. Had she possibly regretted what had happened between them, was that night a mistake? It had meant nothing for her, it was probably just a one night stand, and now she had left because she had realized she had made a mistake. He closed his eyes sadly, as the images of the night they had shared came to his mind.

He reached for the pillow she had slept on and pulled it closer to him, as he relived the night before. Her sweet fragrance was still on the pillow, it smelled like her, like desire and love. A single tear rolled down his cheek, he'd lost her forever...well, he'd never had her, but he'd lost her forever now, and she never got to hear how he felt about her. He opened his eyes again and realized he had to leave, too...there was no point in staying there any longer, but as he was going to place the pillow back down he became aware of the bright objet that was on the bed, it probably had been beneath the pillow. It was a locket, the locket Emily had always worn around her neck, it must have fallen off her last night. He picked up the locket carefully and opened it...he had always wondered what was inside the locket. The picture on the right contained a photograph of an older brunette gentleman. Aaron assumed that had been her father, the picture on the left was of a young girl around five years old, he recognized the beautiful eyes and smile immediately, it was Emily when she was a child and she looked very happy. He smiled for a second running his thumb over her happy face, then another tear rolled down his cheek. He closed the locket and proceeded to get dressed. He truly needed to get out of there...while he was searching for his clothes scattered around the room, he found himself with one more item. A lacey black thong, one he had removed from her body the night before. He picked up the item bringing it to his nose for a second, her intoxicating fragrance filled his nostrils as the image of him making love to her came to his mind. He put the thong in his pocket, and then placed the locket in his shirt pocket. He slowly walked out of the room feeling emptier than he had ever felt in his entire life.

When he arrived at Quantico, he felt worse than ever; he didn't really want to be there, but he was duty bound to be there. He thought again about going to the airport to find her, but he knew again there was no point, he had driven there twice that morning, and he had ended up turning back halfway there. It was obvious to them that Emily wanted nothing to do with him, and that was why she had left the way she had left that morning... without saying goodbye. That night had obviously been a mistake for her, and she had run away from him. This was probably his own fault anyway, because he had treated her so horribly while she was there, and that was why she hated him so much. He had made her life impossible and had driven her away. He knew very well why Emily had taken the job in London...just to get away from him. He had pushed her away, and she had decided to leave because of him. Hotch knew Emily loved her friends and her job, the only reason she had decided to move was because of his stupidity, if he had gotten the balls to tell her how he truly felt about her, none of this would be happening, so this was all his fault, and he would just have to deal with it and suffer the consequences.

Around nine, while Aaron was walking around the bullpen distributing the files his team had submitted, JJ arrived and was on the phone, but he could hear some of the conversation she was having and realized he was talking to Emily...

"I don't know what we're going to do without you." The blonde said sadly to Emily.

"I know...it's just...I'll never get over it." Hotch kept trying to listen without being so obvious that he was eavesdropping.

"I love you, too, Em...call me when you get there, please, and be safe." The blonde said, as she hung up the phone.

"Hey, Hotch...good morning." JJ said, smiling.

"Hi, was that Emily?" He asked, unable to control himself.

"Yes, she's at the airport now...I can't believe she's gone." JJ said, looking sadly at Hotch.

Hotch nodded and excused himself...he went back into his office and grabbed his cell phone, dialing her number one more time that morning, but the phone again went through directly to voice mail. He felt a knot forming in his stomach and his heart aching; she was just talking to JJ, so her phone was obviously working fine, she simply didn't want to talk to him, he listened as the bit of her voice mail beeped in his ear...he stood there silently for a few minutes without knowing what to say. There was just so much he wanted to say, and yet he couldn't, he froze, how could he tell her the way he felt about her over the phone in her voice mail. He stood there for a few more minutes until the machine disconnected the call, and he had no choice but to put his phone away. Emily wanted nothing to do with him, which was obvious; it was the only reason she had not answered his calls but had answered JJ's calls. He put his phone away and realized that he needed to let her go once and for all and admit to himself that he would never see her again.

Emily was sitting on the plane, waiting for her flight to depart, and she had never in her life felt so confused and so empty. She willed the tears to stay at bay, because she had to be strong, and move forward with her decision to leave the country. What had happened the night before didn't have to change her life and her future plans. Yes, her boss had managed to take her to bed and use her one night for his pleasure, and he was probably laughing about her now. How could she have been so stupid as to fall into his game, to let him seduce her and take her to bed...and the worst part was that she had fallen for him. Okay, maybe it was just one night, and there was no way she should have fallen in love with him; now that wasn't true...she had fallen in love with him a long time before that, but she had never let those feelings out until the night last night and now? Well, now, she was heartbroken and humiliated. She knew she was strong enough and she would recover, but she wasn't sure if she would ever forget him. The plane finally began moving, and she closed her eyes trying to relax. She then brought her hand to her neck to play with her locket, because that was something she usually did when she was nervous, only she realized she was no longer wearing the locket. She frantically started searching for it on the floor of the plane where she was sitting and in her seat, but she couldn't find it; she unbuckle her belt and she was going to stand up from her seat when one of the stewardess caught her attention...

"Ma'am, can you sit down, please, we're about to take off." The lady said, making Emily sit back down. Emily nodded, as she felt fresh tears rolling down her cheeks. She had lost her locket, the only thing she had as a memory of her father. She couldn't control her tears, and she brought her hands to her face, finally sobbing softly...how could she have lost it. Her father had given her the locket many years ago, before he had died; it was the only thing she had that had always kept him close to her. She had worn the locket around her neck since her father had given it to her, and now she had lost it. She hated to cry especially letting other people see her cry, but right now she couldn't stop herself, not only had she been used and humiliated by her boss, but she had lost one of the most precious things she valued in life. She felt horrible, she truly wanted to disappear, this was all her fault, how could she be so stupid, she had made two of the worst mistakes in her life in less than twenty four hours, what else could go wrong with that day? She kept sobbing softly as the plane lifted into the air; she wasn't sure how long she cried, but at some point she fell asleep.

It was late that night when Aaron walked into the bar, it had been a very long day and all he wanted to do was have a drink and forget everything that had happened. He sat down at the edge of the bar and ordered a Jameson neat. He watched as the bartender poured his drink and placed the glass on a cocktail napkin. The bartender walked away and Hotch picked up the drink and started sipping...he had never felt so empty and so sad in his life. He never imagined he would be in this place...she had been gone for a few hours only but he missed her tremendously. That day had been devastating for everyone on the team, it was more than obvious how much the team was hurt with her absence. It had only been the first day, and he could already see that team wasn't going to be the same without her. He really wished he had gotten the balls to tell her how he felt about her, before so much damage had been done. He knew he would never recover, and he knew the team will never be the same cohesive team either. This truly was entirely his fault. He drank all the whiskey in his glass and asked for another one...the bartender poured him another drink and again walked away. He sat there drinking alone; he simply couldn't explain anymore how he felt, he reached into the pocket of his suit and pulled out the locket, it was the last reminder he had of her. He opened the locket again and looked at the two pictures as tears rolled down his cheeks. He then flipped the locket, and that was when he was aware of the engraving on the back of the locket:

"Sempre nel mio cuore"

It was in spirit font and he recognized the words as Italian, he didn't know much Italian but he knew exactly what the words meant. Always in my heart. He smiled and brought the locket to his lips, placing a soft kiss on it. This would be the only memory he would have of her, and he would keep it with him always.