Thanks to all my beta 'writers'
River of Freedom
While Vimes and de Worde had been discussing various uses for a printing press, Lord Rust, Mr Boggis and Mr Slant had begun consolidating their power.
The city of Ankh-Morpork was, in their eyes, the biggest pizza ever, and they divided it up like one. Through a series of raging street battles, Lord Rust, being the big cheese grater, ended up with the upper Ankh area; Mr Boggis with the pepperoni, the slaughterhouse district; and Mr Slant with all the olives in the middle that no one likes - the courthouses, Gleam street and, nominally, the Shades.
During this frenzy empire building, Chairman Meow and the Morporkian Institute of Many Rulers took over the rule of the ruins of the palace and the rest of the city centre. Meanwhile, Piano Englebert was the owner of the Ankh-Morpork's first floating pub, the Prid of the Ankh, her fishgut business having gone down the plughole. It became the chosen meeting place for those unhappy with the state of the cities government. And also a place to get very, very drunk, if not a particularly safe one. But any people, using the term loosely, who fell into the Ankh were usually sober enough to get back up in a squelchy stupor and stumble back onto the pub-boat.
It was one month after the destruction of the palace, and Piano Englebert was happy.
Very happy.
For a while she had been devastated by the collapse of the fishgut market (wholly unexpected and very distressing) but now she was a member of the Ankh-Morpork Political Watch and her life had a whole new meaning (One may by now have noticed this distressing trend of Piano's to jump on bandwagons, but one is sure that this plot will eventually not need her to do so...possibly).
Her wonderful pub had also been having hard times, like her fishgut business, caused by the problems in getting to it and the fact that all money was taxed off people as soon as they had it. But now she was a member of the AMPWatch her pub had been declared the official secret meeting place, and on top of all the other members of the AMPWatch, hundreds of spies and killers sent by the city's current governments, all trying to look inconspicuous by drinking the beer (made from authentic river 'water'), had driven profits to an all-time high, never mind the extra cash she got from Vimes and William de Worde for giving the Times somewhere to be printed after it had been thrown out of Gleam street.
Life was good.
From the depths of the floating barge came a startling commotion. Usually this would not be surprising, but it didn't sound like the city's latest popular hit ("row, row, row your pub gently down the sewage), or at least one of the popular hits you got on this pub. It sounded more like a scream, not that they weren't common, but this one sounded –
"Piano, get down here!" a scream that sent shivers down Piano's spine "Get. Down. Here. NOW!" The control in that voice was...non-existent. Piano started running for the hatch to the cabins.
"You took your time!" Angua growled. Literally.
"Sorry, I was as fast as I could, but, why did I have to be so fast?"
"You should know! Carrot is missing! There's a gods damned hole in his cabin and you didn't know!?"
"WHAT!?"
William de Worde slipped through the room, effortlessly avoiding entering the dialogue, and, when about to leave the increasingly damp cabin, turned and said:
"Have any of you seen Vimes?"
River of Freedom
While Vimes and de Worde had been discussing various uses for a printing press, Lord Rust, Mr Boggis and Mr Slant had begun consolidating their power.
The city of Ankh-Morpork was, in their eyes, the biggest pizza ever, and they divided it up like one. Through a series of raging street battles, Lord Rust, being the big cheese grater, ended up with the upper Ankh area; Mr Boggis with the pepperoni, the slaughterhouse district; and Mr Slant with all the olives in the middle that no one likes - the courthouses, Gleam street and, nominally, the Shades.
During this frenzy empire building, Chairman Meow and the Morporkian Institute of Many Rulers took over the rule of the ruins of the palace and the rest of the city centre. Meanwhile, Piano Englebert was the owner of the Ankh-Morpork's first floating pub, the Prid of the Ankh, her fishgut business having gone down the plughole. It became the chosen meeting place for those unhappy with the state of the cities government. And also a place to get very, very drunk, if not a particularly safe one. But any people, using the term loosely, who fell into the Ankh were usually sober enough to get back up in a squelchy stupor and stumble back onto the pub-boat.
It was one month after the destruction of the palace, and Piano Englebert was happy.
Very happy.
For a while she had been devastated by the collapse of the fishgut market (wholly unexpected and very distressing) but now she was a member of the Ankh-Morpork Political Watch and her life had a whole new meaning (One may by now have noticed this distressing trend of Piano's to jump on bandwagons, but one is sure that this plot will eventually not need her to do so...possibly).
Her wonderful pub had also been having hard times, like her fishgut business, caused by the problems in getting to it and the fact that all money was taxed off people as soon as they had it. But now she was a member of the AMPWatch her pub had been declared the official secret meeting place, and on top of all the other members of the AMPWatch, hundreds of spies and killers sent by the city's current governments, all trying to look inconspicuous by drinking the beer (made from authentic river 'water'), had driven profits to an all-time high, never mind the extra cash she got from Vimes and William de Worde for giving the Times somewhere to be printed after it had been thrown out of Gleam street.
Life was good.
From the depths of the floating barge came a startling commotion. Usually this would not be surprising, but it didn't sound like the city's latest popular hit ("row, row, row your pub gently down the sewage), or at least one of the popular hits you got on this pub. It sounded more like a scream, not that they weren't common, but this one sounded –
"Piano, get down here!" a scream that sent shivers down Piano's spine "Get. Down. Here. NOW!" The control in that voice was...non-existent. Piano started running for the hatch to the cabins.
"You took your time!" Angua growled. Literally.
"Sorry, I was as fast as I could, but, why did I have to be so fast?"
"You should know! Carrot is missing! There's a gods damned hole in his cabin and you didn't know!?"
"WHAT!?"
William de Worde slipped through the room, effortlessly avoiding entering the dialogue, and, when about to leave the increasingly damp cabin, turned and said:
"Have any of you seen Vimes?"