The chapters are getting funnier and funnier... don't worry. I did mark this as humor... I can be super funny if I feel like it, but when I wrote this I wasn't in the right mood. Here we go!

Firestar called a clan meeting. He hefted himself up the rocks yelled. He was a man in his early sixties with flaming orange hair and red clothing. He had a big nose, which he was prodding to see if it still worked.

"Great Grandpa? What are you doing?" Ivykit looked up at Firestar, who was busy digging his finger in his nose. She looked much to young to be speaking for a human, but these were cat humans, and had already learned to speak.

"I'm picking my nose," Firestar said irritably. He pulled his finger out and shooed her away. "I wish you wouln't be so nosy." Immediately Ivykit's nose shrank a little, but Firestar didn't notice. He was to busy chortling over his accidental pun.

"Nosy, get it! And I was picking my nose!" He stopped laughing, looked around, and took TwoLeg count. Numbers and counting were whole new things the cats had discovered, and they liked them very much.

"Let's see…thirty-four cats. I mean TwoLegs. No, that's not right. It should be humans; people," He didn't know why he had thought that, but it seemed correct. "Anyway, three are missing!" Firestar yelled to the crowd.

"You forgot 'bout me!" yelled a voice from inside the wreckage of the elder's den. It was Purdy. He came slowly out, a slightly flabby elderly man with a red nose. "How could you forget about an old cat like me? By the way.."

"Plus Purdy," Firestar broke in, "Sorry, but I think next time you should come out when I call. OK, so that makes thirty-five people. Two people are missing. Does anyone know who?"

"I do!" exclaimed Purdy, "Mousefur. I didn't see her anywhere. That's what I was trying to tell you."

"Has anyone seen Brightheart?" said Cloudtail at the same time.

"Well, that sums up who we're missing. Brambleclaw, you go lead a patrol to find Mousefur, and Cloudtail, you can go gather together some cats and find Brightheart."

The two patrols set out and one came back soon after. Brightheart's search party came back, and Brightheart had a very interesting story to tell:

Brightheart had been restless. She couldn't sleep in the night, and woke again and again. Finally she had decided to hunt a little bit, to tire herself out so she could sleep later. She had slunk past the sleepy guards and gone far from camp. She had spotted a night-bird. Crouching, she prepared to leap. Then the bird had heard the rustling as she shifted her weight, and had taken off. Brightheart had leaped into the air, but she soared right past the bird. She had flown higher and higher, but at the same time, her feet hit the ground. What's happening? She had thought vaguely before she closed her eyes and blacked out. She awoke in the morning, her head slightly swimming. She was very surprised at the transformation, and immediately had wondered what she looked like, if her face was still ugly. She had walked to find a puddle to see herself in, and then had gotten lost. Everything looked very different from up above, so the territory looked sort of like a whole new world. She tried as hard as she could to find her way back, and found a small trail that she followed until she met the patrol.

Mousefur was still missing. Her patrol came back at sunhigh without her. By this time, ThunderClan was hungry.

"How do we catch food?" Rosekit asked.

"Well, I think that, since we are bigger than the cats in other clans, we should go over there, find their camps, and just take things from their fresh-kill pile," Thornclaw said.

Firestar heard and was outraged.

"Even though we are humans now, we still have to obey the warrior code! We are going to go into town, like real TwoLegs, and get some people-food, whatever they eat."

"What about Mousefur?" asked Purdy.

"She'll be fine. We are only going to be gone for a little bit, and we probably will meet her on the way. Let's get going"

Graystripe was still singing loudly.

"Shut up!" yelled everyone as they made their way out of camp.

Firestar was right. Mousefur could defiantly take care of herself, and they would meet her, but not in the way they expected.

Mousefur woke up early in the morning, and silently realized what happened. She was very excited, for she had always wanted to have some magic in her life. Her first thought: Well, since I am a TwoLeg, I need some TwoLeg things. I am going to go find some. She strode out of camp on her new feet. She was stronger as a human then as a cat, but even when she was feline she was strong, since she had been a warrior, not a queen.

She walked along until she had crossed what had looked like WindClan's territory. Then Mousefur spotted the TwoLegs walking on a path in towards the Horseplace. Two of them, probably mates. Mousefur ran and hid behind a tree, and a little tune popped into her head.

Robert thought he saw something in the woods. It was a figure darting from tree to tree, as if they thought they were invisible. "Stay here," he told his girlfriend, Jenny, "I'm going to go see who's following us."

"Oooh," she teased, "are you going to protect me?"

They laughed, and Robert walked into the trees. He strode confidently to the tree where he could see the person. He was positive they were harmless, because their figure was small and frail. He walked behind the tree as an open hand came shooting out. It cuffed him in the nose, very hard, and he fell to the ground and to find himself facing an elderly woman. She was humming an annoying theme song from some adventure movie. "Look, I'm not gonna to hurt you," he mumbled thickly, grasping in one hand his bruised nose, the other searching on the ground, like it had a mind of its own, scuffling around for a weapon. He glanced up just as a tree branch swung around to meet his skull. All was black.

Mousefur grinned. A new feeling that stretched her face, but it felt good. She had knocked out the two people very easily. The first had gone down, and the other had come searching. She had turned out their pockets, another new word, and had found a whole jumble of items. She had found a wallet, full of funny-smelling green herbs and a shiny, hard leaf that reflected sparkling pictures. The female had a black handbag that was full of makeup, and another wallet. The wallets tasted so good, but Mousefur didn't know what to do with the makeup. She drew lots of dots on her face with the red stuff in a fat stick, and plastered pink powder in her hair. Then she drew black lines on her forehead with the thin stick.

She made her way slowly through the trees, looking for more people to attack. It was fun! Soon she heard a large group. What were they doing so far into the forest? She followed them for a while, wheezing and stopping for short breaks. All this physical exertion was hard on her old frame. Footsteps came her way, and she lay down behind a rotting log. Three people came into the clearing; two males and a female. Strangely enough, they looked familiar. One male was tall, with dark brown hair. Another had hair in two parts; half was white, the other half gray. The female had the same coloration but was smaller. Well, soon they would be lying on the ground unconscious, and she would get some more yummy wallets! She had to have another… she just had to.

Far away a human dressed in raggady black pelts, and long, wild, messy black hair made her way down to the ThunderClan camp. Hollyleaf found it;

"AAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!"

Thud

"…Ow."

Sorry Firestar lovers! He'll be really idiotic in the next few chapters! Now, who are these three people coming towards Mousefur? Will she get more wallets? Why is Graystripe acting strangely? Why are strange magical occurrences happening whenever someone wishes? How will they get food? And, most importantly, will Hollyleaf ever get revenge? You'll have to wait and see! Reviewers get a doll of Firestar picking his nose, or a doll of Mousefur covered with "war paint".