Making haste, Rincewind went along the streets towards Unseen University. Following his long strides gave me great deal of trouble, despite of the short distance. The Luggage gained on us quickly and stopped to let me climb on top again. It was an offer I took gratefully. I held onto the lid and lifted my legs.
Together, we went through the gate of Unseen University and entered the Great Hall. Rincewind stopped near the door. The Luggage sat down next to him. Its legs disappeared.
I dared to look past the scrawny wizard. My look fell onto a long table with elderly bearded men sitting around. They had any possible shapes of body measurements. But then I caught an even more interesting sight: a long table containing different bowls of food. My stomach rumbled audibly.
"Ah, Rincewind!" exclaimed one of the men who was sitting at the head of the table, "There you are! And right on time for lunch, I do declare!"
"I need to talk something over with you, Archchancellor," replied Rincewind. The man knit his brows.
"Is there any chance to wait until after lunch?" he grumpily demanded.
"Unfortunately not, Sir. It is a kind of urgent case," Rincewind said and moved aside, "I'm not alone, you know." The men nearly dropped knife, fork and spoon when they caught a sight of the Luggage and me. They gave me looks of shock and curiosity and whispered excitedly.
It was the man on the head of the table who recollected first. He got up, smoothed his robe and came towards us. I arose myself and did my best to adjust my clothing. But I failed completely. The dirt of Ankh-Morpork had stuck to the seam of my dress and my boots. In addition, the buttons that had come off and the skirt that had torn open up to the waist didn't improve my appearance at all.
The man stopped directly in front of Rincewind. They were about the same size but the other man was stout enough to outweight Rincewind easily. A white full beard made his face look like the face of a grandfather. His eyes sitting beyond white eyebrows completed the impression. They had a stern yet benevolent look.
The man wore a pointy head, too, but his hat was quite different. It was much more well-preserved than the one on Rincewind's head and more emblazed than the other wizards' hats. First of all, it was taller. Besides, it had a jewelled brim. The tip was made of metal. Someone had attached a lot of fishing hooks to the hat.
I considered my remembering a few moments. Finally the penny dropped. This was Archchancellor Mustrum Ridcully.
The Archchancellor looked me up and down.
"Archchancellor, meet Miss BeeJay," Rincewind introduced, "She says, she comes from Roundworld and asks for help."
"Roundworld, you say?" asked Ridcully. The other wizards exchanged stunned glances and whispers.
"What's your full name, young lady?" Mustrum Ridcully contacted me. His deep voice sounded as if being accustomed to orders.
"My name is Barbara Joann," I replied, trying to focus on him.
"I'm Archchancellor Mustrum Ridcully," Ridcully answered. I concentrated and managed a polite nod.
"I heard a great deal about you, Archchancellor Mustrum Ridcully," I said, "And you're told to be a very wise man, Sir." However, my eyes were drawn towards the buffet on the other table again. The Archchancellor followed my gaze and smiled a bit amused.
"Would you like to have a bite to eat?" he asked.
"Do I!" I exclaimed, almost crying with relief, "I would be so grateful for such a favour, Sir!"
A little later, I had emptied a plate of creamy potato mash, two slices of tender meat and two slices of bread with butter. Feeling a lot better, I took a very deep breath.
"Thank you very much, Archchancellor Mustrum Ridcully, Sir," I smiled. The Archchancellor nodded in reply. He had taken his seat again. Rincewind sat face to face with me, eating a big bowl of mashed potatoes himself. His narrow face had an impression of great savouriness.
Unlike Rincewind, the Archchancellor didn't seem to argue against being called "Sir".
"So, tell me how you got here, Miss," he inquired when he saw I was entirely full.
"I can't tell for sure, Sir," I said and reported the occurrences of the mornings. I mentioned the shaking of the ground and finished my tale with me fainting and waking up here in Ankh-Morpork.
Every now and then, Ridcully or Rincewind interrupted to ask for details. Once my tale was interrupted by the strange silence rolling over the city. This time it seemed to be longer. As Rincewind explained, Old Tom, the University's magical bell, was tolling out another hour. It didn't have a tongue anymore, but the bell nevertheless continued to carry out its duty to strike the hours.
The other wizards had remained silent so far. They just had given Rincewind and me some room to sit and had listened.
"Excuse me, dear young lady," said a medium-sized man with white hair and a pointed beard down to his breastbone, "This is indeed an interesting tale, I do declare. But what is it you want us to do about this?" Unless I wasn't mistaken, this was the Senior Wrangler. A wizard of great knowledge and quite little tact, as far as I remembered.
"I was told a good deal about your skills, gentlemen. I hope you can help me solve the problem," said I, "I would like to know what exactly has happened."
"How?" another wizard said sternly, "Do you expect us to snap our fingers and hope the best, Miss? Magic is not that easy, I'm afraid." The speaker was an extremely obese man. So I could be certain I was dealing with the Dean. Two other wizards I couldn't place at first go agreed with him.
If I'd knew that, I wouldn't bother to ask, would I, I thought. But I bit my tongue. Any wrong word now might spell unnecessary disaster.
"I knew it!" This exclamation had been made by another magician who was sitting aside. I could place him without any doubts. Being the youngest on the table and having no beard, this could be no one else than Ponder Stibbons.
The young man eyed me interested and started talking about space and time. But he soon noticed that I didn't get his words and the others weren't listening at all. He pulled a sour face, adjusted his glasses, hid his face in his cup and fell silent.
So did the other wizards. The only sound was caused by Rincewind chewing constantly.
"Isn't there anything written down in the books?" I wondered after a while. Still the silence continued until Rincewind arose, wiped his mouth and went out.
"What's on his mind?" I addressed Mustrum Ridcully. The Archchancellor made a dignified face and got ready to answer when another voice spoke up. It had an oddly squeaking sound.
"Red," someone said. I looked around and noticed the shortest wizard, a thin, frail-looking man whose face had a distant impression as if he had been dozing or something. Now the impression changed. A grin spread, making his face look a bit off-the-wall.
"Red!" he demanded again. Mustrum Ridcully cleared his throat and looked at the man I recognized as the Bursar.
"The Bursar says, he'll ask the Librarian," he explained.
Rincewind returned with an orang-utan waddling at his heels. The ape planted himself in front of me and looked me up and down.
"This is the Librarian," Rincewind said and sat down again, "I told him about you. So he came to see for himself." The Librarian extended a big hand resembling a large black leathern glove. I shook it carefully.
"Pleased to meet you," I said. The Librarian gave me a friendly nod and a tooth-ridden grin. He climbed onto the chandelier to make himself at home. Then he looked at me again and uttered a few meaningful sounds.
"He says he knows the details of every book in the library, and he can't remember anything like this," Rincewind translated. His mouth twitched.
"Thank you all the same," I said, looking at the ape and giving him a shy smile. Then I peeked at Rincewind. Somehow I began to feel sorry for him.
After all, I had asked him for help, and coming to think of it, he could have said no, couldn't he? But he hadn't. Besides, it wasn't his fault that there wasn't anything in the books.
"Is there any other possibility to find out?" I asked Mustrum Ridcully. Again, the wizards fell silent and gave this a long thought. This time the silence was broken by a sound very similar to a cat coughing up something. When I looked, I noticed it had been the Bursar. The skinny man coughed for a few minutes before he slowly reached into his pocket and brought forth a little bottle. There were small white pills inside. He shook three pills onto his palm, swallowed them, closed his eyes and managed to say, "Ri... Ri... Ritual."
His voice was still high and pitching, but it bore more self-assuredness than before – as if he had waken up. He gave me a friendly glance.
"What do you mean by that, old chap?" Mustrum Ridcully asked.
"The... ritual... of... AshkEnte," answered the Bursar and looked at his colleagues. The thought crossed my mind that he hadn't been on such a different planet at all.
I swallowed hard. For all I knew, the ritual of AshkEnte wasn't a minor thing at all. It was used to conjure Death himself.
"Are you really sure about that, old chap?" Mustrum Ridcully assured himself, "He is really busy, you know."
"He is extremely busy, I do declare," the Senior Wrangler piped in, "We can't summon Him up all the time." The other wizards nodded in unison. The Librarian uttered a few sounds.
"The Librarian is in doubt about that, too," Rincewind translated again.
"I don't think we have any choice about this," the Bursar said slowly, "No one among us knows how the young lady has gotten here. We don't know what to do, either. So maybe He will."
Ponder Stibbons opened his mouth. Then he reconsidered and bit his tongue.
The Archchancellor cleared his throat and looked at the wizards.
"Very well then. We'll carry out the ritual of AshkEnte tomorrow," he said. The other wizards nodded. Two emotions moved me deeply. First Hope entered and chanted about finding a solution. Fatigue interrupted promptly.
"Excuse me, gentlemen," I said, "I'm very tired. Could I lay down somewhere and get some rest, please?"
The wizards looked at each other again. But this time their glances showed a feeling of discomfort. Then, after a couple of minutes, all the wizards, bar two, arose quickly, gave me a polite nod and left the room. The Archchancellor took Rincewind's arm and drew him into a corner.
I couldn't hear them talking but I saw the Archchancellor taking a small leathern bag from his belt and opening it. He took a few coins from the bag and handed them to Rincewind. The scrawny wizard looked at the coins as if he had been commanded to make enough clothing for the entire Discworld out of three small spools of thread.
"I'm sure Mrs Marietta Cosmopilite has a room for rent," I heard the Archchancellor say, "I want you to take the Miss there until tomorrow, Rincewind. Look after her and take care of her."
"Why me?", asked Rincewind. He gave me a glance from the corner of his eyes and grimaced.
"You did bring the Miss here, didn't you?" Mustrum Ridcully said, "To my opinion, that makes you responsible for her."