After some massive editing I am putting this chapter up. I was up til one in the morning editing this so I hope that it's alright. Thankfully FFn fixed the problem they had with the system it's because of that, that this chapter was supposed to be out a few days ago but when you have over two hundred emails just from FFn then there is much you can do about it.

As usual I don't own Twilight but I am the owner of a brand new to me bed that only has one problem it squeaks.

I pulled out New Moon next; I wonder how this one goes.

Great just great I get a paper cut in a house of Vampires. I know that I'm clumsy but not that clumsy. There is no way that I would cut myself on a piece of paper like that especially in a house of vampires. I started reading it but I couldn't really get passed the fact that Edward left me in the woods alone with a vampire who may or may not want to kill me. I wouldn't be so naïve to think that Victoria would just give up on me like that. She may not be in this book but there are still two books after this one and she must come after me in one of them.

I waited a few days after I read of the break up with Edward because even though I know that there is no chance in hell that it would be happening well it still hurt and to found out that I would be unresponsive for four months except when asked a direct question is strange even for me.

Renee was worried about me the next day because I had dreamed about the birthday party and I couldn't exactly tell her that I dreamed about a family of vampire huddling around me after I got a paper cut. Wow this book took a lot out of me and I barely had enough strength to go to school after I read this one. I almost ended up like the book said I would be like if he had really left me. But I wouldn't really do that to my parents after all they have done for me anyway.

I had a feeling that Jacob would be in this book and I will defiantly try my hardest to not do anything that the book sees me doing anyway so I won't need him. What was the use of leading him on for a few months anyway just to end up jumping off a cliff while telling everyone that I wasn't trying to kill myself? I am getting ahead of myself there. Only I would head to the one place that has both vampires and shape-shifters and think I was safe.

No Victoria in that book but at least I know that she is still after me. The only one that I really feel sorry for is Irina because she had a mate or so she thought for a few weeks or is it a few months can't really be too sure about that.

The way I am with Jacob is similar to the way I was with Edward in this book anyway. I need Jacob just to survive just like I needed Edward in the first book. Naïve and stupid is what I am in these books so far. Talk about going around in circles. Hopefully by the end of the book I would have no need for Jacob any more. I have a feeling that that won't happen.

I chase after Edward so that he doesn't get himself killed because he thinks that I'm dead. Who would have thought that would happen? If Jacob had handed the phone over to me when I was standing right there then that whole mess could have been avoided. I can't have Jacob control my life like that either making me choose between staying with him or going to at least try and save someone and not have their blood even if it is a metaphor on my hands. I may not have been directly responsible for him trying to kill himself but it was over me that it was happening. Very Romeo and Juliet of him, except his Juliet and I'm Romeo, that's the way that I see it.

I get back with him after everything that he put me through, I only have one word for myself stupid, what was I thinking. How nice of me to say about myself, must really hate myself now. Don't really like the Volturi anyway going by everything that I have read and not really looking forward to going on a trip there in the near future but at least Aro can't read my future and Jane can't cause me any pain.

I can't believe that I cling to Edward after everything he put me through after the Volturi. Then ask to put my mortality up to a vote. I can't really understand what Rosalie has against me but I suppose that I will find out in one of the other books. Surely she can't just be jealous of me just being human.

I can't believe that Jacob thought that I was avoiding him so he brings my bike up so that Charlie can ground me from spending all my time with Edward but what he doesn't know that I was already grounded he just made it harder for me. Friendships work both ways so he could have come and seen me not like he doesn't have anything better to do. I'm think that with all the wolf patrols that they have one of the wolves would have been near my house at all times with Victoria on the loose. But no he has to be in his own little world, that or Charlie didn't gossip to Billy about me being grounded in the first place or Jacob was barely ever home to hear the gossip off his dad in the first place.

So far this is what I have worked out what I am doing different from the books. Getting a haircut and dyeing it a different colour might go black with some streaks going through it, I'm thinking red and blue. Clothes they will have to be changed as well with me moving to a colder climate that will happen anyway no skirts or dresses for me and absolutely no one is going to be buying me any clothes. Thankfully I have a bit of money saved up from all the babysitting jobs that I have had over the years as well as the that the library give me every few months for helping them out when they need it and the grocery store down the road where I worked when Renee needed help paying the bills and let's not forget the collage fund that 'Renee' has been investing for me if they government ever found out that a teenage girl was playing the stock market and earning more money than I should then I would be in humungous trouble. At least I know what I'm doing and Phil has helped me a little bit since we sort became close when I realised that Renee was serious about him. Have to have someone with a PO Box that I could get the letters sent to without causing much trouble and you have to be over eighteen to get one anyway. Phil has been really good for me when I need stock advice as well with his very small pay from the minor league baseball team he pays with he puts half in the stock market and doesn't tell Renee because he learnt the hard way that she can go through money like there's no tomorrow.

I think that might be all about New Moon for now might wait a few more days till I read Eclipse just to get everything in my head the way that I want it to play out.

Still haven't worked out my ability yet hopefully they tell me in the books.

Please review and hopefully I will have eclipse up in a few days. I have just finished writing Bella first visit to the Cullens and still haven't finished Breaking Dawn or Midnight Sun but Bella, Jasper and Edward have all been in my ear about writing it and Alice got upset that she only has a small part in that chapter.