Every great superhero has a side kick. Batman has Robin, Sherlock Holmes has Watson, and even MacTavish had Ghost always by his side.

I, sadly, have Joker.

"Fucker," I groaned, keeping one hand on the wall for support as I went. I messed my leg up during our last mission, and was now trying my hardest to limp my way to the infirmary without falling over and tasting the floor.

Of course, it's all the way on the other side of the base, god forbid anything be easy in this hellhole.

"Everything alright sir?"

I let out a long sigh in annoyance, recognizing Jokers light accent. When I heard he was British I had hoped he would be at least a little like Ghost. Fast, efficient, good with paper work, even just being quite would be great.

But no, he's the exact opposite. Lieutenant Dexter Maxwell is, and will forever be, a pain in my ass.

He began walking beside me, keeping with my limping pace as we made our way down the endless seeming hallway. He raised an eyebrow when I didn't answer him. I just kept my eyes forward, a pissed off look on my face.

"Need some help sir?" He asked innocently, grinning.

That fucking grin. It annoys the shit out of me. I don't know why. Maybe it's the fact he's always so damn sarcastic and happy-go-lucky. Maybe it's the perfect teeth. I really don't know.

"No, I'm fine." I mumbled, turning to him. He tilted his head in question and continued to keep pace with me.

"You sure?"

"Uh-huh."

He was silent for a few seconds, watching me with concern I knew for a fact was fake. I let out another sigh and smiled tiredly, trying my best not to be an asshole in hopes of being the bigger man.

"Really, I'm f-"

The hallway ended at a bend, meaning I ran out of wall to lean on. Not noticing, I could only yelp like a surprised dog and fall. Joker grabbed me by the arm and hauled me back off the floor, sending white hot pain up my leg. I groaned and leaned all my weight on him as we started again, now even slower.

"Ahhh, this is so your fault!"

Joker looked at me, trying to hold back a smile.

"Well, it's not my fault you fell through the roof mate."

"You….. YOU TOLD ME IT WAS STABLE!"

"You asked my opinion, so I gave it, sir."

The way he was keeping himself so calm made my blood boil. I stared into his dark brown eyes, gritting my teeth.

Then, I got an idea.

I studied his frame. He was my height, with maybe with a little more muscle.

"Ah, sir?" Joker asked, a little more nervous than concerned. I laughed.

"You know what would be awesome?"

"…What?"

"If you gave me a piggy-back ride."

The Englishman stopped cold and stared at me, surprised.

"….No…Just no…"

"Do I have to make it an order?"

Joker groaned miserably and rolled his eyes. He stopped supporting me and turned around, letting me jump onto his back. I laughed and ruffled his chocolate brown hair as he carried me.

"Good boy Joker."

"Permission to speak freely sir?"

"Granted."

"I fucking hate you."

"Love you too Joker."

I love it when I win.