"Does my butt look fat in these jeans?" Sam asked, looking slightly desperate. She asked this question rather loudly and several students in the cafeteria snickered at her question. Carly and Freddie briskly glanced at each other before preparing to lie to a virtually irritated and distraught Sam. During this very delicate time, they knew that it would be fatal to tell her the truth.
The answer to that question was yes. Yes, her butt did look rather large in those jeans.
Freddie instantly began to stuff his mouth with tater tots to avoid responding. He did not want to suffer a concussion so early in the afternoon. Carly, however, bluntly lied to Sam without any hesitation. "Don't be silly, Sam. Your butt looks fine in those jeans." Carly grimaced before returning to her pizza.
Sam huffed impatiently, she did not look convinced. "Fredqueer!" Freddie virtually choked on his tater tots; he felt his knees start to tremble viciously which meant the end was near. "How do these jeans make my butt look? Honestly." Sam anxiously waited for Freddie to respond.
"I don't know," Freddie said, avoiding eye contact and trying desperately to keep his quavering body still. "It's not like I look at your butt." Sam raised her eyebrow. "And anyway, you're sitting down. How am I supposed to know?" Sam chuckled humorlessly. Freddie allowed himself to glance at her, but only hastily. She had a determined and irritated expression on her face.
Sam nodded slowly as if contemplating something serious in her head. Then, she abruptly stood up from her seat, dusted off her colorful hoodie and gradually turned so that Freddie and Carly got a clear view of her plump backside. "Fredwardo, how do these jeans make my butt look?" She repeated, firmly. Freddie's eyes grudgingly fell on her backside.
Freddie stared at Carly, who shrugged disloyally. He frowned at her. He knew he currently had two options. The first option was to tell the truth and die a slow, painful, excruciating, gory, horrific, bloody, terrible, tragic and gruesome death. The second option was to lie and hopefully come out without any bruises. "T-those jeans s-suit your butt nicely." The funny thing was that he was half telling the truth. Hey, he was a guy and Sam was a girl. A girl with a rather nice backside. He gazed at it a little harder and noticed a large red spot. Carly seemed to have noticed it too.
"Wait…Sam…you have a spot on your pants." Carly said, narrowing her eyes to get a better look. Sam immediately wiped around to face the duo; she looked absolutely mortified. Freddie averted his gaze to his lap. This was really embarrassing. "Sit…sit…Sam…sit down!" Carly shrieked, making Sam even more embarrassed. Sam gingerly sat down. "Are you wearing a pad?"
Sam blushed, looking indignant. "What?!" She exclaimed, furtively glancing at Freddie. "Of course, I am!"
Carly shook her head. "Well…obviously you need another one…"She sighed, annoyed. She snuck a hand under the table where her leather bag laid and quickly lifted it onto the table. Her hand fumbled apprehensively through the bag. Her face brightened as she pulled out an "invisible Flaw" pad. "Here," she said, as she handed it to Sam. "Go change."
Sam looked at the pad. "I can't" she said finally, gently pushing Carly's hand away. Freddie started to whistle as an attempt to lighten the mood but all he received were glares from both Sam and Carly.
"What do you mean, you can't?" Carly asked, bringing the pad closer towards Sam. "Go change!" she said, bossily. "You can't walk around like that all day!" She reached over to grab Sam's hand and forcefully shoved the pad into her palm.
"Exactly!" Sam said, resentfully, dropping the offensive pad on the table. "I have a HUGE spot on my pants! How am I gonna make to the bathroom without anyone seeing?" Carly frowned. "You have class in like five minutes! Who is gonna hide m…"Sam stopped suddenly and looked at Freddie, knowingly, a wide smile growing on her face. Carly too gazed at Freddie.
"What?" Freddie asked gradually. As he looked back and forth at Sam and Carly, realization stuck him so hard, that all the oxygen was nearly knocked out of his lungs. "No way! No way!" He was nearly shouting. "I'm not going to hide, Sam!" Freddie defiantly crossed his arms against his chest. "And anyway, I have study hall next class!"
"Study hall is not a class." Sam proclaimed, rolling her eyes.
"Is too!" Freddie snapped back, rolling his eyes as well.
"Oh, stop being so childish!" Carly shouted. She stood up, grabbing her bag, pulling it onto her shoulder. "I've got to go but Freddie please, please hide Sam." Freddie shook his head fervently, his mind made up. "Just stand behind her! That's all you have to do!" Freddie shook his head, firmly.
Carly crouched down so that only Freddie could hear her. Sam watched the exchange suspiciously. "Do it or I'll tell everyone about the time you peed on yourself during an episode of "Girly Cow."
Freddie looked betrayed. "Hey! That was years ago and it was a scary episode!"
"It was last week and it had friendly ghosts in it!" Carly smirked, playfully. "Think of Casper."
Freddie opened his mouth to retort but found himself tongue-tied; he dropped his arms in defeat. "Fine!" He hissed, glaring at Carly. Carly smiled brightly. "I'll hide you." He said reluctantly to Sam. Carly shrieked with joy before turning her heel and leaving the couple by themselves. The moment she left, the awkwardness escalated.
"So…"Freddie began, looking at Sam nervously. "Shall we get you to the bathroom?"
"Yeah, yeah…whatever!" She snapped, taking Freddie aback. "Just come here and stand behind me." Freddie reluctantly complied. "Listen, Fredwin. I have some pants in my locker; we're gonna have to go there first and then the bathroom, understood?"
"Do I have to go in there with you?"
"That doesn't matter right now!" She sighed, making Freddie even more apprehensive. His heart was practically threatening to explode. "Just…c'mon, let's go. You're making me lose time out of my science class."
"Science class?" Freddie asked dubiously.
"Sleeping class." Sam confirmed, clutching the pad from the table and getting up. "Okay…c'mon. And don't forget to stand behind me…at all times!" She added though gritted teeth.
They started moving at a slow pace out of the cafeteria, with Sam occasionally grabbing Freddie's thighs to make sure he was still behind her. People openly stared at them as they went by for Freddie's body was so close to Sam's it looked like…well…like something totally not appropriate for school. Freddie couldn't help but to react to their predicament. Hey, he was a guy and Sam was a girl. A girl with a rather nice backside.
Sam fidgeted uncomfortably. "Freddifer…something is…I don't know…something is…poking me…."
Freddie's eyes widen in horror. Stupid, stupid, stupid hormones! He visibly panicked as he desperately tried to come up with a plausible excuse. "Oh…oh…yeah, sorry. That's my uh…that's my...remote control…?"
"Remote control?" Sam repeated, slowly.
"Yeah…I fell asleep last night with the remote control in my hand." He mentally smacked himself in the head. "Silly me."
"And it just happened to fall into the front pocket of your pants?"
"No! no….no…c'mon Sam!" Freddie stammered. "I'm not stupid… it just happened to fall into my underwear…"
Silence.
"And just how long were you planning on keeping it in there?"
Silence.
"Not long."
Silence.
"Mind taking it out, Fredqueer?" Sam asked. "It's bothering m…"
"LOOK!" Freddie yelled. "Isn't that your locker, right there?!" Sam followed Freddie's gaze.
"Yes…it is." She said warily.
Freddie visibly relaxed. He followed Sam to her locker, trying to calm himself down. Sam proceeded to unlock her locker and subsequently drew out denim shorts out of her locker and examined them, making sure they were free of spots or stains. Freddie stared at the pair of shorts, they looked quite unfamiliar. "I didn't know you owned denim underwear." Freddie
"They're shorts, Freddly."
"Really?" Freddie asked, thoughtfully. Sam nodded impatiently. "Well, they're way to short."
Sam snorted. "I appreciate your concern…wait, no I'm lying…they're shorts, Fredwardo, not g-strings." Freddie shrugged indifferently.
"I almost couldn't tell the difference." Sam rolled her eyes. "Seriously Sam! You might as well wear only your underwear."
"Really Fredwierd, I appreciate your concern…no, wait…I'm lying again. This the only thing I have, so get use to it!" She slammed her locker door shut. "Let's go to the bathroom." Freddie's heart started to pound again. He had previously asked Sam if it was necessary for him to accompany her inside of the bathroom but she failed to give him a conceivable response. He proceeded to press his chest against her back until they reached the bathroom.
"Wait out here!" Sam demanded once they reached the girl's bathroom. Freddie sighed in relief. He tapped his foot the tile floor as he patiently waited for Sam to come out. He was still a little uneasy from the whole situation he was in earlier. It didn't occur to him just how curvaceous Sam was until that moment. How could he not have a reaction? She was a very pretty girl…with a rather nice backside.
His thoughts were stopped as Sam emerged from the bathroom. His eyes immediately fell on the shorts she was wearing. His throat went dry. Her denim shorts almost disappeared under her hoodie. She smirked at him and clapped her hands together.
"Thanks for all the help, Freddie." She grinned, showing off her pearly white teeth. Freddie grinned back. "Now, get out of my way!" She demanded, although giving him a smile. "I have to go to science class! "
"Sleeping class?" Freddie asked.
"You know it, dude." Sam winked, gave Freddie a small, slightly awkward pat on the back and left. As she left, Freddie couldn't help but to stare at her spotless, denim-shorts covered butt. Hey, he was a guy and Sam was a girl.
A girl with a rather nice backside.