The three of them were going to an autopsy room. Booth had no idea where they were; he had gotten lost at the start.

"So, have you found out who the victim is?" Brennan asked. She was able to pay attention to the case; Booth had put a shirt on. Ramón raised his eyebrows.

"How are we supposed to get a person from that?" He looked down at the corpse. The head was still separated from the body, it was still covered in sand and it was still disgusting.

"Agreed." Booth said, looking down at it too and pulled a face.

Brennan sighed and lifted the arm. "A fracture here… but it's remodeled."

"Cause of death?" Booth asked.

"Booth, I've only been looking at it two seconds… how am I supposed to get cause of death?" Booth raised his eyebrows at her.

"Did it have anything to do with the removal of the head?" he asked.

Brennan scowled and started to look at the head. "The head was removed post-mordem."

"Good." Ramón and Brennan both looked at him. "What? That always makes me that much happier."

"They're dead anyways."

"So? I'd rather be shot than get my head chopped off."

"There is more chance of survival with a bullet…"

"No, I meant, if I were to die anyways, I would rather be shot."

"What's the point? You're still gone, does it really matter?"

"Yes, of course it does? Are you telling me that you wouldn't mind getting your head chopped off?"
"Of course I would mind, but-"

"Vale." Ramón interrupted them. "Are you always like this? It doesn't matter. But I have to agree with Booze."

"Booth." Brennan and Booth said simultaneously.

"Ok. Should I leave? Am I getting in the middle of anything?"

"No, of course not" they both said simultaneously. Ramón frowned.

"But you should leave. Both of you." Brennan shooed them. "I can't work with you two breathing down my neck. Leave." She didn't wait for them, she just turned once more to the remains.

Booth huffed and left. Ramón followed. Booth sighed once he realized this and leant against the autopsy room's door when he was outside, Ramón included. He could feel Ramón was trying to speak.

"She is very… hot" was Ramón's attempt at getting on Booth's better side. Duh, he thought, but instead he grunted. "Are you gay?"

"What? No." Ramón frowned. "Go on then, you can talk about her. Just keep the drool in." "Ok. She is very… reina de la muerte."

"Wow… Buddy, I had no idea of what you're talking about."

Ramón raised his eyebrows. "Who is this Buddy you talk about?"

"Hey, I'm beer."

Ramón brow furrowed.

Booth sighed. "We used to go on long walks with Buddy… throw him sticks."

"Who was Buddy?"

"My neighbor's dog. He got run over by a truck. Splat." He smiled sarcastically at him.

"Are you always this pleasant?"

"Only when some Mexican bozo takes a case just to hit on my partner."

"Isn't that what you do? Without the racism."

Booth resented that. "I love my job, buddy, but I don't use it as a meet and greet." He was starting to get even more angry at the smug little Mexican twat, with his blonde hair and shiny smile… to shiny. "Bones is just… an added bonus."

"So, you are attracted to her." Ramón said with a sly smile.

"What? No, I mean, yes-" he cursed. "-We're just partners." He said glumly. Why was that so hard for people to believe? Ramón's face showed that he was one of those people. "Ok then, good friends." He pulled a face.

"Claro que si, mi querido amigo…"

"What does that even mean? And I'm not your amigo."

"Claro que no…"

"Stop that!"

"Ok."

"And that."

"Ok is English."

"Yeah, but you said it with an accent." He scowled and looked at the floor. Ramón smiled and came closer to him.

"I just want you to know that I plan to sleep with your antropóloga lady friend." He whispered.

Booth's eyes widened and he jumped up. "What? You can't-" Ramón smirked. "-do whatever you want."

He tried to act cool, but he was seriously considering punching him in the face.

"Yes, I am. And you can't stop me…"

Booth frowned. "Who are you, Dr. Evil?"

"Funny film… and no. Hmm… you obviously don't like me, Agent Booth."

"You can say my name!"

"So let's make this interesting. Whoever gets your partner in bed first, wins."

"Wins what?"

"A punch. In the face. I'm sure you could ruin my face in one punch."

"Yes, I probably could. You seem to care about your image, you must be confident about winning… wait what am I saying? I'm not playing your sick little game."

"Why not? You want her, don't you?"

Booth was quiet, and Ramón smiled. He got angry once more.

"Listen, I really don't like you and I have no problem with punching you, your face and every other part in your body right here, right now."

"But you won't." Ramón knew that he wouldn't.

"You're right. Because I'm decent." It sounded more meant for himself than for Ramón.

"Venga, sabes que lo quieres…"

Booth pulled a face. Now this guy really crept him out. "I've known Bones for nearly six year, I'm not going to jump her because some Spanish, Mexican weirdo wants to win a bet."

"How about more interesting… a thousand dollars, pesos, whatever."

"What? This is getting dangerously close to prostitution, pal." He saw faces looking up at him and he put his voice back down. "And I'm not playing."

"Oh, come on."

"It starting to seem like you're the gay one. And no." he turned away.

"A thousand dollars, pesos, for you. You know her better that I do, you're bound to win."

"I'M NOT PLAYING!"

"What's going on?" Brennan popped her head round the autopsy room's door.

"Oh, nothing..." Booth stuttered nervously.

"Nada, señora." He seemed perfectly calm.

"Bones, I should tell you something-"

"Your hair looks wonderful up, Dr. Brennan." Ramón said loudly, draining out Booth's voice.

"Thank you…" Brennan frowned, but Booth could see that she was starting to get flattered. No, no, don't do it Bones… his head screamed. But, if there wasn't a bet, there really was nothing wrong. It wasn't like she would do it… yes it did.

"Hey, Bones, how's the autopsy going?" He said loudly, and he put his arm around her.

"Oh… um, it's great." Did she also seem flattered at him having his arm around her? Ramón seemed to think that Booth had accepted to the game, because he grinned widely. He and Booth had a stare down that Brennan seemed unaware of;

"Um, I found something interesting. In here."

"Oh, something interesting." Booth joked. "That normally means something really gross, I would know, I know you so well…" he still had his arm around her as they entered and he threw a look at Ramón. He was grinning. Wow, this was sick. He would do this to protect her from the creep, he didn't have to sleep with her. Just keep her in their room at all times.

Thoughts?