a/n : Thank you for all the love and support ! *Throws stray, unfed and sexy Lokis at you guys*

p.s. : Unbeta'd and all mistakes belong to me. All the outrageousness of this story too.

I don't own Loki nor any Marvel-related things in my story, I only own my OC and the plot.

Enjoy reading EMSGGBNG !

Warning : contains some peanuts and strong languages, I advice those who are sensitive with flowery words should stay away from this story and pretend that you never came across it.

Chapter 3 : The God of Mischief versus Cheetos.

EMSGGBNG Entry #2 : The Care and Feeding of Your Stray Norse God.

As expected, you'll be inclined to take care, feed and still listen to all the crap your Norse God will be giving you for the next few days. Their diet mainly consists of regular lashing and race discrimination to your species, stroking their ego, and your mother's homemade pudding.

I spent the past few days taking care and tending to Loki's wound ever since he'd arrived. We've made a brief introduction of ourselves after making the deal. I made him a decent living space by using the spare pillows, comforters and blankets I had in my closet. Loki paid no attention really, though sometimes he'd complain of the boredom and he'd vent it all out at me. Well, I'm not the one who's all knocked up here right ? And as the following days passed by, Loki's wound gradually looked better compared to its initial state before.

Sneaking around while carrying food was really harder than I'd thought it would be. There was even a time in which my brother almost caught me one night, clutching a Tupperware with my Mom's pudding in the middle of the night. You're probably wondering what's wrong with me being caught with pudding right ? Well, the sad thing was, I absolutely, tremendously, horribly (emphasis on the next word please.) hate my mom's pudding. It made my stomach sad, and I personally liked my stomach happy, thank you. I'd managed to slip away from my brother's suspicious looks by coming up with a really really bad excuse, though miraculously, it worked. And I can't even find a logical reason to explain why.

Today was already the seventh day of Loki's surprise visit to my house. And what a troublesome and annoying surprise it was, indeed. Despite all that, I felt pretty proud of myself, you know ? It ain't easy to keep a bitchy God and keep him dehydrated and well fed in a house with alert and prying eyes present everywhere. I'd also managed to change the door knob of the temporary door of Loki's "room" to keep my pesky family from knowing what lies behind the damn door. I made Loki keep a spare key for him and the other for me to use, I'd also remind him to lock the door regularly when I was away. Though personally, I didn't think it that necessary. My dad was a travelling journalist for some big-hit industry, so it meant that he'd only come home rarely, and when he did, he'd spend a full week being with us, to make up for the lost time, and honestly, it didn't bother me at all, he was a good man and I loved him, he was the best father I could ever have. My dad was also paid a ridiculously large amount of salary for his job, which was odd, since as far as I knew, journalists only made so little, but I didn't question him anyway and his income was more than enough to feed our family, I only felt grateful for that. On the other hand, my mom was your average and regular housewife, she took care of us, cooked our meals, and was there for us whenever my brother and I had some problems in dealing the real life. She also used up most of her free time, volunteering at numerous charity events, helping the community deal with outrageous shit, and cooking and baking too (which wasn't bad at all, except for her pudding, well, that was another story) thus, she'd only come home home to fix us our meals, needs and other stuff whatnots and then she would go off with her other bff's (the crazies, widowers single moms, etc. you know them) to assemble in their teeny, tiny, little club, better known as the 'Sexually Frustrated Housewives' or SFC as I would like to call it. And as for my brother, he was already twenty-eight years old leaving a huge age gap in between me and him, and though he was old enough to deal with his own problems, he would still come to me to ask for advice, and I was already willing enough to give him some. My bro was a NEET, which also meant that he spent most of his time, coped up in his own room. He rarely comes out though, he's pretty much considered a nocturnal creature (like me! )but when he does, you'd expect him to party all night and sleep all day after his great escapade.

I was now seating beside Loki, eating a large bag of Cheesy Cheetos as watched the large T.V play America's Next Top Model while seated on the stylish but comfy couch in the living room. We both decided to chill out from his "bloody damn prison" by which also happened to be my unfinished future room. Dad had already left a few days ago to resume his work while Mom traveled to the countryside to attend some crazy lady convention (and I don't want to even know what it was about), for a few weeks and my brother was now also busy crashing himself at his friend's place while our parents were away.
And it all came down to me and Loki, owning the house for albeit while the grown-ups were away.

Loki took a few scoops of his homemade pudding (one word : ew) before complaining about how ridiculous each contender looked at their photo shoots, he would shamelessly complain about how extreme thin most of them looked.

He swallowed another scoop (in a sexy manner) of pudding with his uninjured arm before speaking.

"I'd always know you petty mortals to be fools one way or another." He paused while taking another scoop again. God, how can he can make any horrible food look delicious while he just simply ate it ? Really, that was so unfair.

"But it has always piqued my attention at how incredibly low and stupid you all were, and this just proves it well enough." He says while pointing his spoon to the television. I stared at him while his attention was on the large screen. Would his hair be as silky as how it had appeared to be ? I wondered for a moment before Loki called my name out to grab my attention.

I narrowed my eyes before throwing a few of my Cheesy Cheetos at him. He tried to dodge, but given with his current state, I didn't think it was possible.

His eyes were now wide at shock as he gave me a snarl. "How dare you mortal to throw foul things at me ! " He exclaimed but I found it terribly amusing and so, I only gave him a good and loud laugh.

I laughed as I wiped a tear welling up from my eye, this was way too much.

"And you want to rule over these 'stupid fools' ?" I say with mockery present in my voice, I can only say it didn't please him as much as it did to me.

He glared at me as he set his spoon on the now-empty plate where the pudding was before.

"I was made to rule. To be a king, and therefore, I shall fix these damned ways your people have grown accustomed to and with that I shall build a new kingdom, because in the end, you all will always kneel —" He looked and gave me the creepy grin he was so famous for. "—to me. " He continued, still having that creepy grin plastered to his face. Even with him, making a valiant effort trying to get me to 'succumb' to him, I didn't feel threatened by his words or presence anymore, instead, I found myself growing rather fond of his company, I'd even enjoyed interrupting him while he made his 'I was made to rule' speech crap.

I threw another set of Cheesy Cheetos at him.

He glared and growled at me this time and I just simply laughed back at his face. Hah. Take that you narcissistic douche.

"Are you really trying to provoke me ? Do you not know your plac—" He stopped as a loud buzzing sound, accompanied by my Justin Timberlake's 'Suit and Tie' ringtone echoed throughout the room.

Loki looked surprised, and even more as I fished out my smart phone from pocket of my cargo pants.

I gave him a finger, telling him to shush his mouth while I took a call from my friend. He followed but didn't look happy when he did so.

I held up the phone to my ear. "Yo Jake, what's the sitch ?" I call out, earning a raised eyebrow from Loki.

I only held out my tongue to him.

"Such unacceptable manners for a lady, Tsk tsk." He shakes his head in disbelief before giving me another grin.

"Shut up." I shot back to Loki.

"Excuse me ?" Jake's voice called over from the phone.

"Oh sorry, J, It wasn't meant for you." I apologized to him through the phone. At the corner of my eye, I found Loki grabbing the remote and flipping through the channels, he looked really bored.

"It's cool. Uh hey, about the movies—" Jake starts through the phone, I wondered why he sounded sad though. Jake, Emily, Emily's boyfriend, Nash and I decided to go for a movie this coming Friday. It was my idea, to celebrate the couple's 'Finally Getting Hooked Up Together' moment. Emily, my only best female bud had been recently drooling over Nash for quite some time now, and she'd managed to shock Jake and I, with the great news of her and Nash, finally being a couple. Over time, Jake and I worried over Emily, we thought that it would end up as a nasty case of one-sided love for her, but eventually we were proved wrong.

"Yeah ? What about it ?" I say casually over phone while chewing the Cheetos in my mouth. Loki still paid no attention to me, and it seemed that he'd found some interest over something playing on the T.V. . It was none other than the Wildlife Channel featuring Penguins roam in groups in the Antartic ice. Loki looked really adorable and I stared at him (again) for a bit before diverting my attention back to Jake on the phone.

I could hear Jake sighing over the phone. "You see they bailed out. Well, not technically, they asked in a kind way though." I could imagine him massaging his temples. "Sorry about that Trish, but hey, I'm still up for the movies on Friday, how about you ? " He asked, his tone, slightly improving.

I thought about it for a moment, well, I could never leave Loki all by himself here while I go watched some movie with friend, it'd be really risky, leaving him all alone and vulnerable here at home. I looked at him for a moment.

"Sure, only if I can bring someone with me." I replied back to Jake with a grin. Movies with Loki might be fun, I wasn't going to miss that moment.
"Uh, sure, I guess." Jake says with a disappointed tone. Sorry Jake. Can't leave the guy here or else I might find my house burning down to pile of ashes when I come back home. I hope that you'll understand, buddy.

"Thanks a lot, J. Same time ?"

"Yeah." He replies dryly.

"Okay then, see 'ya." I say back to over the phone before cutting off the call. Loki now turned his attention back at me, abandoning the Penguins in the T.V..

He raised again his dark brow at me. "I take it that you've made plans with someone ?" He asks in the same velvety voice that screamed, 'Eat Me'.

I grinned back at him. "You're coming though, can't leave you here. " I reply back to him. He then gave me confused expression.

"But before that, I'll have to teach you stuff tomorrow, I think your arm is better now, right ?" I asked him, hoping to receive a positive reaction and honest answer from him.

"No, it is not." He says dryly, clutching his injured arm with his other free arm in a protective manner.

"Aw, come on ! It has already been a week, surely you Gods can heal quickly, can you ?"

"Stop pestering me with questions mortal. If I say that it is not, then that would be the last of it. Do you understand ?" He says with a hard expression on his face.

I flinched back for a moment. Loki looked serious. I wondered for a moment why ? I mean really, aren't God's blessed with the power to heal and regenerate quickly ? Well, a week has passed now ever since he came in my house with a huge gash wound, it should have healed rather quickly right? Unless. . .

I faced him now and looked at him, straight in the eyes. His emerald green eyes never failed to drown me in their beauty. "Tell me Loki. . . are you . . ." I trailed off. I didn't want to offend him but it had to be done after all, I needed answers to my internal questions.

"Mortal?" I continued but the word nearly came out as a squeak. Has Odin stripped him off of his immortality now? Was his punishment really that heavy ?

Loki didn't reply for a few seconds, instead he only stared at me with those eyes.

"Loki. . ."

"Must you really pester me so much you human filth !" Loki burst out and I found myself jumping from my couch, tightly gripping the edges for support.

Loki proved to be really terrifying when he got mad. I mean he just scared the shit outta me right now.

Sighing, I called out to him again. "Loki, I'm sorry if I've offended you or anything, you see, I was only curious—"

"Curious ? " Loki started to laugh now. "This why you mortals always find yourselves situations that threatens for the safety of your life ! Are you not even aware of your very own Midgardian saying ? 'Curiosity killed the cat' ?" Loki starts huffing out in rage.

"Or do want me to demonstrate what I'm trying to point out here ? I'd be very much interested in doing so." He finishes, his tone now calmer but nevertheless, it was still giving me the chills.

I flailed up my arms in defeat. "Okay, okay, I understand your point, but really, I'm just curious, that is all, I didn't mean to flip your bitch switch on."

Loki's eyebrows furrowed in confusion.

"My Bi-what ?" He asks.

I gave him a knowing look. "Bitch Switch. You know, when someone ticks you off, and then you go on raging, bawling your eyes out."I explain to him. I felt the sudden change of the atmosphere eased the tension between. Well, at least things were now cooling down.

Loki shook his head in disbelief. "What is it with you humans and your vocabulary ?"

I gave him a half-smile and shrugged. Happy that the tension was now finally relieved off.

"I guess that we're just spontaneous that's all."

Loki nodded. Although the tension has already died down, I still couldn't help myself from asking again, I needed an answer. An honest one.

In a low and calm tone, I asked him . "So. . . are you ?" I was hoping that I don't flip the switch again.

Loki looked at me before sighing and rubbing his temples. "Fine, I am , now, are you content ?" He asks in a ticked off tone.

I smiled at him. "Yes I very much am."

"Though why couldn't you just tell me earlier though, are you like on PMS or something ?" I asked him as I crossed my arms over my chest.

Loki shot back another expression of confusion to me. "Pm-what ?" Loki shook his head. "You do realize that I am the God of Mischief, right ? Which means, that I don't make it easy for everyone." He grinned at the last part.

"Touché." I say back with a grin too.

Loki smiled, it looked genuine enough and so I returned him with a smile too. I'd never thought that hanging out with Loki could be so scary but entertaining at the same time. I'm glad to have met him.

I got up and took the plate where the pudding had been earlier. I flinched a little at the reminder of how it tasted. I wondered how Loki was able to surpass the taste, does he have a magical tongue too?

"Are you not disgusted ?" I asked him and then I felt goose bumps rising over my skin as I once again remembered the putrid taste of it.

"By what ?" Loki asked, raising his head to look up at me while he tore his attention from the T.V..

I raised the used platter in the air. "This."

He raised an eyebrow. There it is again. The need to rub my thumb over it and stroke it all over is killing me . Damn Loki and that brow. Damn him for being perfect.

"I find the taste, quite exceptional. Is there something I should be aware of ?" He asked, still using that that goddamn sexy voice.

I stared at him for a moment, finding his appetite and taste, really weird. I shook my head but my eyes never left him as I did so. "No. . ."

After a few seconds, I spun myself around, and started making my way towards the kitchen when I slipped and fell. "Oh Shi—"

Unfortunately, my face met the cold hard floor first. The plate (thank goodness it was plastic!) rolled onto the floor. Not longer than that, I felt a long, cool, and slender hand grab my mine and yanked me up.

"Fuck. . . that really hurt." I complained as I got up. I rubbed my face, feeling my left cheek hurt a little. This will probably bruise.

"Is this a habit of yours ? Mindlessly tripping on the floor?" Loki asked, his tone of voice amused, I could hear a faint chuckle coming from him.

". . . No." I said while balancing myself, my other free hand was now settled over his chest. I felt the thin fabric of his black shirt within my palm, his chest heaving as he inhaled and exhaled. And then suddenly I felt intimidated his height. Analyzing, I'd be guessing he was somewhere over six feet and three inches.

I looked up to him, feeling him towering over me. His expression, still amused. His mouth, smirking.

"I just. . . well, uh the floor looked like it needed a hug."