Hi I'm Wendy!
I'm, like, shopping right now, cause I like totally need new shoes, cause I like sold a whole bunch of them at this charity auction last week. They were, like, so last season anyway. But I made tons of Coins for shopping cause people will pay waaaaay more than the original price for shoes that belonged to a celebutante princess such as moi, plus I even autographed a few to raise their value but I stopped after like the first forty cause my hand got too tired. But now I got like lots of money to spend on new shoes! Well, not like all of it, it was a charity auction after all, I had to donate like one percent. See, I can totally be generous you know!
I went to Foot Locker to get the Princess Daisy sportswear collection which are these sneakers with this totally CUTE flower dot print on canvas… HEY if PRINCESS DAISY has her own shoes line WHY DON'T I?! Grrr I'm gonna bring this up later with King Daddy! Anyway, like then I got a new pair of ice skates cause my old pair got ruined when the nasty plumbers went and assaulted me and wrecked my castle for like the bazillionth time a couple months ago. But now I'm at my favorite store, Paymore Shoe Emporium.
It's their grand opening at the brand-new Coconut Mall, and it's, like, even bigger and better than my old favorite location at Toad Town, and they even got a race track!
OMG you will never guess who I ran into passing through the men's section! My brother Ludwig, Kooky von Geekwad, he's like trying on a pair of men's dress shoes. He, like, usually HATES shopping, and he's always picking on me for spending so much on shoes and clothes and makeup and jewelry and perfume and bath supplies and everything else I like, which is, like, so hypocritical, you know, cause he spends waaaaay more on musical instruments, like this cello he just got that cost twenty thousand Coins, and he says his golden piano is worth like fifty times that much!
"Ludwig? Like, what are YOU doing here?"
Ludwig looks at me all snooty and says, "It would appear that I have outgrown the pair of dress shoes that I have been wearing for the past five years."
"FIVE YEARS?! GROSS! Like, how can you stand to wear the same nasty old pair of smelly old shoes all the time for that long?!"
Ludwig says in this like really snooty tone, "It's called getting one's money's worth."
"You're one to talk." I point at the price tag, which is seven hundred Coins. "Your shoes cost as much as mine!"
"That may be so, but the difference here is, I am buying ONE pair, not fifty dozen."
Ugh, BOYS! They just don't understand…
"But I NEED all of these! Summer's coming up and I need at least like eight pairs of flip flops! One for pool parties, one for the beach, one for swim meets, one for picnics, one for the lake, one for cruising, one for shopping, and one for wearing around the castle! And the entire Viva La Diva springtime pink heels collection is on sale for four hundred Coins a pair and I HAAAAAVE to have them!"
I open the five shoeboxes to show Ludwig the SUPER CUTE sparkly pink heels and he scoffs and says "You're buying five pairs of the same color of shoe?"
"Oh, my gosh, are you, like, colorblind? They are NOT the same color! The colors are hot pink, rose, magenta, fuchsia, and special edition Princess Peachy pink!" HEY, why does PRINCESS PEACH get her own signature color pink and I don't? It's the same shade of pink as MY favorite color of pink too, the thieving tramp! Grrr I'm bringing this up with King Daddy later too!
Ludwig laughs all sarcastically as he puts the dress shoes in the box - if I'm not mistaken, they're, like, the same model as the last pair! - and takes it up the register to buy them so he can wear them at every concert and piano recital and other lame fancypants kind of event that he likes for the next five or more years. "My dear sister, sometimes I wonder if your displays of excessive materialism are done for the sake of wearing what you purchase, for fashion or vanity's sake, or simply for the sake of making a purchase."
That nasty Ludwig hurt my poor babies' feelings! I kiss them to make them feel all better. "It's all right my babies, he didn't mean it, that mean old Kooky von Geekypants is all gone now." Next time he says anything I'm gonna show him why the gals at the Women of Racing Organization call me the Beat-down Princess.
Anyway I gotta buy like a few more pairs before I take a bathroom break. I've seen everything here now except the clearance section. Usually there's like nothing good there just icky old shoes from last season, but sometimes I can find something totally cute that got by me last season, or like something that's just right for a certain occasion.
I see like lots of great prices on designer snow boots, but I don't know, they like might be old by next winter. But wait, I'll need them just in case King Daddy takes me on another ski trip to Cool, Cool Mountain this summer! I search the racks until I find a pair of pastel pink ones in a Dragon-Koopa Ladies size 5.
While searching, I, like, omigosh! I find this CUUUUUTE pointed toe Yoshi leather pink flat with a bow over the toe spotted with white pearls and a golden 'EK' in the middle! It like totally matches my May We Please Have Some Couture quilted leather cannage pink handbag, and it's JUST MY SIZE!
"HellOOO BEAUTIFUL! Where were you last season?" I pick her up and stroke her. She's on sale for 199 coins, original price 1179, what a steal! "Where's your twin sister?"
I find one of the same size really fast, but then I realize that I like picked up two LEFT shoes! Grrr that's what I hate about the clearance shelves, they always mix up the shoes and sometimes you just CAN'T find a left and a right of the same size! I find a right one, but it's a Dragon-Koopa Ladies size 11, that's like waaaay too big, like for ladies the size of King Daddy! GRRRRR I might just have to settle for this Koopa Troopa Ladies size 9.5. I try them both on and I can like hardly tell the difference.
Okay I'm like done here for today. I carry my tall tall stacks of shoeboxes up to the register and charge them all off my plastic and have them put in bags. It's like a whole lot to carry but I don't mind cause I'm like really strong from doing this a lot.
I take them on the escalator and ride up to the floor with the restroom. The big roomy one-person restroom with the handicapped sign, it has blow fan dryers instead of paper towels, which are like SOOO annoying if you're like just trying to dry your hands after washing but they're good for other things, and it has an auto-flush toilet that scares the crap out of me even if I like didn't take a crap yet and I'm still sitting on it! Oh and it like also has a Ukiki Care changing station which makes me like think of all the times King Daddy made me change Junior's diaper while we were out before he was potty trained. But it's still like the perfect place to have some special me and shoes time.
I'm like gonna sit on top of the Ukiki Care to do this, it's new and not so pooped and pissed and drooled on by brats yet. The EK beauties are the first on my list. I can tell they are made out of real Yoshi leather because it's made of soft supple little scales that feel almost like smooth skin and because I dated a Yoshi once. I thought they were disgusting creatures at first, but my BFF Birdo told me that Yoshis are great in the bed and she was right! They got a tongue that can go for MIIIIILES and like never finishes! I close my eyes and remember that time me and Yoshi fucked while rubbing my lips over the left one's delicious leathery point, feeling my way up, taking the pearly leather bow in with my tongue, nibbling it a bit, then moving my lips down lower until they go around the toe point. I drool at the taste, just like a live Yoshi.
My vag is like super gooey right now, but once I got the left one all wet I take her tip first through the back door. I like, like to do anal and a bunch of other foreplay first so that my vag is like, REALLY roaring for it once I get to it. I moan and grunt while shoving her up there, squishing my buttcheeks open and shut over her. All of the shoes are going to get a turn up there before I'm done here.
I put the tip of the right one up to my gooey wet clit and rub it slowly along, closing my labia just a little bit over it. "MMMMF!" My labia like love the bow. They like the flappy Yoshi leather, the beady feel of the pearls, even the cool metal of the EK... you know, I like, just realized something. I have no idea what 'EK' actually stands for. O, MG, I like kind of have an idea, but...
I take both shoes and look at their soles. I see the signature of "Emilie Koopa", who is, like, my MOM!
EEEEWWW YUUUCK! I like just committed shoecest! I like had no idea my mother had a shoe line! Who would buy her shoes anyway, she's like old and druggie and so not cool anymore! For all I care she can take her lame ass band called Orifice and shove it!
The shoes are still pretty though, but I like can't stick them all the way up anyway, they're not stilettos after all. But I'm gonna go play with a strappy first. Fun fact: a strappy can double as a strap-on!
My new stiletto strappies are shiny and metallic and they have straps long enough to go all the way around my legs! Well, almost. I take the shoelaces out of the Princess Daisy sneakers and use them to help tie the strappy all the way around.
The strappy is strapped on with the toe sticking upward and the heel sticking forward, ready for a tranny style fuckfest! The first victims shall be the laceless Princess Daisy sneakers.
I use my tail to pull the laces to make the strappy heel go up and down. I drive it through the inside of the sneaker and pick it up until it hangs by the shoe tongue and falls off. I then turn it over - all with the stiletto dick, of course - and jam it into the rubbery sole. GRRRrrrraaaahhh it feels like SOOO satisfying ramming it into the bouncy springy rubber. Even more satisfying since it's a Princess Daisy shoe - I always liked her better than Peach. I mean, not in a lezzy kind of way... except like now maybe. I open up the other box of sneakers and use my dick heel to untie the shoelaces.
All right, now my vajayjay is roaring to eat some heel! I saved the best for last of course - the Viva La Diva heels collection. These heels are longer than your dick - you know who you are.
Which one, oh, which one... the Princess Peach. I'm like too horny right now to drool over the smooth shiny brand-new patent leather finish, so, after strapping myself into the changing station - it's like a bit small for a teen Koopa like me, but I like tight bondage anyway - and I take rightie Peach and jam her right in.
"GRRRrrRRRAAAAAHHH...AAAAAAHHH...AAAAHHH!" I pant and thrust against the restraints, shoving Peach in with my tail so hard it feels like the heel's gonna snap off, but I know it won't because patent leather isn't cheap and flimsy like the faux imitation leather that shoes made in a cheapo Real World China factory are made of.
Here... I... cum...
I scream and I feel like a big pool of liquid come out. I feel like totally and I mean totally finished now, which is like weird because usually I can have like thirty big O's in an hour before I'm done for the day.
I unstrap myself and then I see that I came blood all over the changing station! Omigosh I better clean that up or people are gonna think a baby got battered to death on that thing! Wait a minute, I, like, never came blood before! I'm starting to hurt now, did I like rupture something?
No... it's not that kind of hurt... I like just remembered, my period starts today! I was like so caught up with shoes on the brain that I totally forgot that!
And now I'm stuck in the public restroom with no tampons, no painkillers and a big bloody mess that I can't clean because I... my legs are... cramping up... WAAAAAAHHHH!
But worst of all, my Princess Peach Pink Viva La Diva stiletto heels are all bloody and ruined!
Like, wait, they actually look kind of HOT with all that blood on the heel. Like I just stomped all over my cheating loser ex-bf kind of HOT. Like, I could be starting a new fashion trend here!
I kick my old pumps off and put on these new heels, dry off and soothe my bloody vagina with the automatic hand dryer, and look at myself in the mirrory walls that they got in this swanky new bathroom stall. I like don't even care that I'm nauseous from pain, or that my coochie is leaking blood all over the floor through my now-trashed Victoria's Shell thong, because I look totally FABULOUS!