CHAPTER THREE

I remember how badly you hated seeing your old house. The poor skeleton thing, charred and dilapidated. The city was busy with other things so it didn't get flattened right away. Remember when you used to go there often, torturing yourself with old memories that weren't your fault?

You were stuck, you know. Stuck in some sort of mental dugout you'd made for yourself. Did you think you deserved to die with your mother? You don't like talking about it, I know, love, but sometimes I wonder why you went back. You never did tell me.

Shade's Point of View

"I cannot believe you fainted in front of a gang member," Rachel said, as we were sweeping up Harry's store in the morning of our shift.

I rolled my eyes. "I cannot believe you think Spot's in a gang. He carries at slingshot for God's sake. And he's a newsboy. Not all newsboys are in gangs."

Rachel shrugged. "I heard being a newboy is sort of his day job. He's in a gang, Shay. The leader, actually."

I snorted. "And where do you get your information, Rach?"

"Around."

Startled, I glanced at her. Why did it seem as if everyone, all at once, was hiding things from me? A week ago I probably would've written this off as something silly my friend Rachel said, but not now. I felt she was hiding something from me. I didn't like secrets.

I sighed, shuffling down an aisle, shoving dusty tomes in their rightful places on bookshelves. It had been three days since I'd seen Spot last, and I wasn't sure if I should be relieved or upset by this. After putting all the books away, I leaned against one of the back shelves and closed my eyes, thinking.

There wasn't a day that went by that I didn't miss Caleb something fierce. Not just because he usually stood in front of my father and I, taking the bruises and the words himself, but because I felt safe with him. He was my best friend.

I didn't understand how Caleb leaving me could be to protect me. If anything, I felt as if Caleb had cowered out and then ran away to save himself. I couldn't think this way, of course, because somewhere I knew that wasn't the reason. I couldn't blame him for something we all suffered.

"Shade?" a voice called and I straightened up, seeing Rachel hanging at the mouth of the aisle I was in. "Your dad's outside looking for you."

I sighed and then slunk out of the labyrinth of shelves, keeping my head low as I stepped out into the chilly afternoon air.

"Hello, Father," I said quietly to the ground.

"You know," he began. "Now that your weak, insufferable bastard of a brother has run away, I think that it's high time you stepped up to the plate." He frowned. "Is she ready? Hmm, yes she looks ready — not as weak as the boy..."

Suddenly angry, my fists balled at my sides, glaring at the ground. "Caleb is not weak," I hissed and then looked up at him. "And what are you talking about? Ready for what?"

My father grinned. "Oh, you'll find out soon enough, little girl. Let's just say that your brother ran away from his fate — but you can't. You were born to lead them, and you will lead them."

I bristled. "I'm not doing anything for you. Especially if Caleb ran away from it. I'll be damned before I do anything that he ran away from."

"Loose-tongued whore," my father growled and gave me a swift slap in the face. "Honor thy father, little girl."

I straightened up slightly and frowned. "Fine. Sorry."

He grinned in a sort of maniacal way. "And make sure you bring me dinner home when you're done here. I'm starved."

At this dismissal, I stepped back into Harry's, shuffling back into the aisles of bookshelves, tossing my head at Rachel who looked at me curiously.

"I saw him slap you," Rachel said quietly. "What happened?"

I shrugged. "He said Caleb ran away from his fate, and that I had to lead 'them,' whomever they are."

"It must be awful, if Caleb ran from him. And he was very brave," Rachel said softly.

"I'm going to find him, Rachel. Alive," I said quietly, watching her. "It might be the last thing I ever do, but I need answers, and I'll be damned if I don't get them."

"But what if he's dead, Shay. Dead and not able to talk. What then?"

We both shared a painful silence for my brother.

Rachel would never admit it, but she fancied my brother in the worst way. It hurt her as much as it hurt me when he just up and disappeared, no reason and no way to find him. She didn't share my optimism that he was alive. I believe she thought it better for her heart to believe him to be dead.

We got back to work soon after, handing off pre-ordered selections to those high class woman regulars, and helping those who had wandered in off the street. Eventually, Harry gave me the broom and patted me off towards the front walk, giving me a wink. Funny old man!

I stepped outside, smiling slightly at the startling warm breeze that wafted up the street and tickled my face. It was the beginning of March. It should've been cold air. I got busy with sweeping, thinking about what my father had said to me about leading people. I couldn't be a leader. I was awful at being a civilian, let alone the leader of something.

"Hey, Shade!"

I looked up to see the Double Trouble twosome heading towards me, arms hooked in one another's. Joker and Wicked, I believed they called themselves. Three boys followed behind them. Spot and two others I'd never met before in my life. I sort of waved and then looked around for my father. He wasn't supposed to know I had friends. Who knows what he'd do to them.

"It's swell to see you again, Shade," the girls said, in their funny way of speaking at the same time.

"You guys, too," I said, giving them both hugs when they let go of each other long enough for me to do so.

"Hello again, Shade," Spot said, staring at me like he always did, like he was looking right into my soul. It was unnerving and frightening.

"Hello," I said quietly, glancing at my feet.

"We came to see you so you could meet the gang, Shade!" Joker said, breaking the weird silence between us all.

Wicked nodded and then tugged one unknown boys forward, grinning. He was a half head taller than Spot, give or take, with mousy brown hair that desperately needed cut and yellowish cat eyes. "This here is Silver. Spot's best friend forever and second in command."

He gave me a warm-hearted grin and stuck his hand out. "Heard plenty about you, Shade. It's lovely to finally meet you."

I shook his head, shocked. "Likewise."

Wicked then produced the second unknown boy, a tall, lanky boy with long, thin black baby-thin hair tied back with some twine. He had dark blue eyes and sand-white skin. He was also, I noted, carrying a book of sonnets.

"And this," Wicked said. "Is Lysander."

I found this amusing and charming. Lysander was a Shakespearean name and he looked every bit the part. I wouldn't have been surprised if he told me he once knew the man. I shook his hand as well, sort of blushing when he bent to kiss my hand like a proper gentleman.

"I've also heard plenty of you, Shade. You're lovelier than Spot said you were," he said in a quiet, musical voice.

I glanced at Spot but he wasn't looking at me when Lysander said this. I wondered why that was.

"So you guys are in Spot's gang, yeah?" I asked suddenly, remembering what Rachel had said about Spot being in a gang. I figured now was a lovely time to ask, since I was meeting his friends and meeting them seemed important to him, otherwise he wouldn't have brought them to see me.

Spot's head snapped up at this question and regardless of the hole he was trying to burn in the side of my face, I still stared at them four of them, waiting.

"Yeah. We are." It was Silver who proved me correct.

"And what on Earth would possess you all to want to get to know me?"

"Well, you're—" Joker began but Lysander slapped a hand over her mouth. Her eyes widened as if she realized she was about to say something she shouldn't have. I felt left out and angry at this.

"What my darling friend was about to tell you, Shay, is that we just want to get to know you. Spot doesn't stop talking about you," Wicked said, covering up for the obvious faux pas.

Joker gave her counterpart an apologetic smile when Lysander let her go. Finally, Spot spoke up. "Can you guys give me a second with Shade?"

The four of them moseyed off down the road, though Joker and Wicked kept stealing glances back until the boys gave them a shove and they minded their own business. I returned my eyes to Spot and then began sweeping again.

"If you're trying to be my friend, you have a really odd way to showing it. Keeping secrets from me and then meeting your friends. It's just really odd," I said.

"What if I'm trying to protect you, Shade? Ever thought of that?" Spot asked.

I frowned. "I don't need protection, Spot."

"That's the third time you've said my name."

He said it so quietly that it surprised me. I felt bad for snapping. "I say your name plenty of times to my friend Rachel."

Spot cracked a smirk at me. "Oh, so you do talk about me to your friends?"

I blushed. "Perhaps. And you don't?"

He held my gaze, his eyes shifting to something almost passionate. "You have no idea."

I looked up again when Silver came back over, saying something low in Spot's ear. Spot looked around and then nodded shortly. He looked at me and grinned. "See you round, Princess."

"Bye, Shade!" Joker and Wicked called, waving, and then they were all gone.

I finished sweeping the walk and then went back inside. Rachel was staring at me with her mouth hanging open. I sighed.

"Now what?" I asked.

"Shay, that was Spot's gang. You just met Spot's gang," she said, aghast.

I shrugged, setting the broom where it normally went, behind the door. "They're all really nice. But they're all hiding something from me. It's really starting to bother me. What do they know that I cannot?"

Rachel smiled. "Spot's probably just trying hard to protect you. You should see the way he looks at you, Shay. Honestly."

I rolled my eyes. "He looks at me like I'm an obnoxious little girl."

"He looks at you as if he were drowning in the ocean and you've come with the only boat for miles to save him," Rachel said quietly.

I gave her a silly smile. "You've been reading too much, Rachel, for your own good."

"Whatever you say, Shay. Look, I told Harry I was running to the mailbox to mail something. You gonna be okay here for ten minutes while I go?" Rachel said, pulling out a crisp envelope from her bag.

"You're sending a letter? To whom?" I asked, surprised. She had never talked about having family out of town before.

However, Rachel just gave me a silly grin and ducked out of the store. More secrets. Just great. I looked up to see Harry descending from the 'tower' in the little bookstore that was really just a glorified loft.

"Harry, why does it seem that everyone is keeping secrets from me?" I asked him.

He sat down and patted his lap, which I gladly took refuge in. He ran a comforting hand down my hair. "My Shade, do you remember your mother telling you and Caleb about angels?"

I nodded. "She would bring us here and read every single novel about angels," I agreed. "She said that angels often came disguised as humans, in order to help the believers walking the Earth. Like guardian angels."

"Indeed, love," Harry said, smiling his crinkled smile at me. "Perhaps this is God's way of putting people in your life to help you. Now that Caleb is not here to protect you, He is giving you another refuge. Regardless of how dark it seems, my Shade, there is always light somewhere."

I knew he spoke the truth. I knew that in my heart. I just didn't want to believe it. It was almost too insane to believe. "Thank you, Harry. I suppose I should be grateful. I'm so used to being alone, though. How can I possibly get used to having so many people protecting me?"

"Because, my Shade, believe it or not, you are one of the most lovely young ladies I've ever known. It was only a matter of time before someone other than I, Caleb and your mother noticed." He winked at me then and I stood up.

I knew he was talking about Spot, and I knew Rachel thought he kept looking at me like I was something amazing, but until I saw proof myself, nothing would change. Though I had a feeling everything was about to change, and that's what frightened me the most.

Haha. Once again, this chapter leaves more questions than answers. Don't you just hate that? Well, maybe you don't. Next chapter, we may have some answers. If I feel like it. ;]

Hope you've enjoyed. Love me with a review? :]

CTB!

xx Wicked