A/N: All characters belong to SM.

Chapter Two

The boys around here don't respect a thing, respect a thing at all.

The boys around here don't respect me, respect me at all.

Boys Around Here - Fences

Late August, 2012

I wait in line behind Alice at our favourite coffee shop, one that we frequently sit at for hours, a small seed of dread in my stomach in reaction to the mysterious smirk that has adorned her face since she first picked me up this morning. I thought for sure that she wouldn't be able to get out of bed today at all, let alone want to go out for coffee at ten AM, but I guess that's Alice for you.

And I was much too curious to hear what she had to say to pass this up. Whatever it is, it's got to be really good, good enough for Alice, who is usually quite subdued, to get this excited. In fact, she is absolutely bouncing on the spot.

After ordering our iced coffees and muffins, waiting for our food, and finding an empty table in silence, I can't take it anymore. As soon as we sit down across from each other, I make eye contact.

"Alice," I exclaim, "What is it?"

Her smile widens and she looks down at her fingers that encase her plastic cup briefly before meeting my eyes once again. I think she's trying to figure out how to say it.

"Well," she begins, humour colouring her voice, "Edward texted me this morning. You do remember Edward, right?"

And it's a legitimate question. When I drink, I tend to black out more often than not.

But how could I forget Edward?

With his extremely touchable hair, bright green eyes, and that smirk? Not to mention the way I was introduced to him… I want to crawl into a hole just at the memory of that unfortunate incident. I mean, really Alice? Clit piercing?

The piercing in question I had done last April when I was living in New Zealand for a few months. I left home in the middle of February, and came back late May. I knew the behaviour I was engaging in was spiraling out of control, even I could recognize that. The people…the parties…the sex….the drugs….yeah; so not good. So when one of my best childhood friends, Ben, moved down there last fall and left me an open invitation to join, I had to take it.

And despite my currently depleted finances, it was the best decision that I could have made.

Of course, the clit piercing was the "spur of the moment" kind of decision because Ben was getting a labret done, and I figured, why not?

But I guess the why not came before I knew that Alice Brandon would blab her big mouth, especially to one Edward Cullen…

"Yeah, Alice. I remember him."

I pointedly scowl at her. Her smile grows impossibly wider.

"Well, Edward says he has several questions for you; that he is extremely curious about a few things…"

"Oh?"

"He said he was very interested in knowing how walking up and down stairs is for you; if it is uncomfortable, if you catch my drift."

I burst out laughing.

"Really? He said that?"

Oh, what a dirty, dirty boy.

Alice is laughing too hard to speak, but nods her head exuberantly in response.

"Bella," she manages after several large gulps of air, "I think the boy likes you. Now let me tell you all about Edward Cullen…"

But I don't hear anymore; my mind is frozen at the word like. I don't do well with like. Like tends to give me almost-panic attacks. Like sends me running faster than anything. Like hasn't happened for me in two years; not since him. Not since… James.

We fall down on the sofa that sits in front of the television and James asks me if I want to watch a movie.

"Sure," I reply. Not caring in the least what we do as long as this evening doesn't end just yet.

James was wonderful at Cirque.

Complimenting me on my blue dress.

Opening doors, letting me through first.

A hand at the small of my back as we find our seats.

His hand clasped in mine throughout the entire show.

I mean, if this is how it always is in a relationship, I have no clue why I haven't been in one until now.

James is just so…perfect.

As the opening credits of whatever movie he picked out lights up my television, I try really hard to concentrate on them as I feel his hand move to my knee, rubbing small circles into the bare skin. I have no idea what to do now, but I lean into him just a little bit more.

Apparently that's enough.

When he lightly grabs my chin, I turn my head so that my eyes meet his. His blue eyes are wide open and look between mine before he leans down and kisses me.

When James first kissed me a few weeks ago, I was so worried that I would be no good at it; that I would embarrass myself and send him running. But James could care less that I had no experience. He said he felt privileged to be my first kiss. He also told me that I was very good at it.

But even now, as we kiss, his tongue sliding against mine, his mouth encasing my top lip, I'm still getting used to the foreign feeling.

James leans over me further, pushing me down, pushing me onto my back; his weight on top of me. The hand that was on my knee has slid up my thigh, bringing my dress up with it.

And I'm still trying to lose myself enough in the kiss to ignore this new development. I'm still trying to be normal enough not to care that his hand is only a few inches from my underwear.

It's really difficult, and my thoughts are running a mile a minute.

And then suddenly, or at least suddenly to me, his other hand is on my breast. He is rubbing and pushing. And moans are coming out of his mouth. And he is no longer kissing my mouth, but is licking down my neck, kissing the tender skin there.

My breathing has picked up, and I don't think it's out of excitement or arousal.

But obviously he does.

The hand that was crawling up my thigh inches its way closer until it is right there. Rubbing and pushing. Touching a part of me that no one has ever touched before.

I let out a whimper. I mean, I can't really help it at this point.

James groans with me, and lets go of me long enough to pull his shirt quickly off his head. His eyes, that were wide and blue earlier, are now hooded and black as night. Before coming back down, he pulls lightly on the hem of my dress, the hem that has worked its way up to around my waist. His eyes question mine.

And I nod because, what else am I supposed to do?

And although I should be feeling self-conscious right about now, being that for the first time someone is seeing me in my underwear, is touching me above said underwear, there is still too much going on in my head to even think about that.

Is this really what happens after only three weeks of dating?

Is James going to expect to do this every time we see each other now?

How far does he want to go?

Before leaning down on me again, James caresses the inside of both of my knees, simultaneously pushing my legs apart. Before I can even think about closing them again, he falls back down, and I feel him, right there.

I breathe out in shaky breaths, trying not to let him see the panic that is slowly rising; trying not to let him see that I'm more than uncomfortable right now.

Because I think I love him. And if I love him, shouldn't I want to do this?

He kisses down my chest, his fingers pulling the straps that are still on my shoulders down my arms. Those fingers circle around my back. They unclasp my bra.

I let him take it off. I have to.

And now his mouth sucks on a nipple, his other hand pulling and twisting the other one.

And all I can concentrate on is how foreign this feels. I'm not sure it feels good…it's just wet, and strange.

And his mouth slowly moves down stomach, placing small kisses on my skin. His hands leave my breasts, and slide down my sides. And as soon as I realize where he is headed, he is already there. His fingers grab the sides of my panties and pull then down, all the way off, just as his mouth kisses me right there. And if I thought his mouth on my breasts felt strange, that is nothing compared to how strange this feels.

And admittedly, all I can think about is, when will this be done? I can hear the movie playing and a part of me still wonders what movie it is.

A part of me wonders if James had any intention of watching it at all.

But as his finger enters me, my thoughts are brought shockingly back to what the present.

It hurts.

Really, really hurts.

I groan out, not being able to stand the pain in silence any longer, and I think James takes this as encouragement. He pushes his finger into me harder and harder.

And it burns, hurting worse than anything that I've ever felt before.

After what seems like ages, but is most likely only a few minutes, James drags his body up mine once again, his finger leaving my body. Only…only his jeans aren't on him anymore, they are on the floor, along with the rest of our clothes.

When did that happen?

As he leans in to kiss me once again, I relax slightly. At least kissing is something I know. This state of calm doesn't last long, however, as his hand reaches around his back to grab one of my own.

And he brings it down, under the waistband of his boxers, to touch him.

I circle my fingers around, my thumb and middle finger looping over one another. And I move my hand up and down, because I think this is what I'm supposed to do.

Only, instead of moaning again, James curses.

"Ow! Bella, not so tight!"

It's the first words that he has spoken since he asked me if I would like to watch a movie. I loosen my fingers immediately, shame washing over me that I managed to hurt him in this very basic act.

James moans as I continue to stroke him before stopping my hand just long enough to pull his boxers down.

His hand reaches for my chin again, only this time he is pushing my head … down.

No, I didn't give into the blow job that day.

In fact, it wasn't until a year later that I actually did suck his dick.

But that's a different story for a different day.

So I look over to Alice, my smile from minutes ago gone, my appetite replaced by the telltale nausea at my thoughts.

"Alice, Edward doesn't like me."

And she backs down, knowing that I will shut down if she pushes that particular topic.

"Okay, maybe not like. But he's definitely into you. And Bella, Edward is probably one of the best guys that I know"

"You think he is into me just because he wants to know if I get turned on by going down the stairs?"

"Well…yeah."

We both laugh again and the tension caused by thoughts of James slowly leaves my body.

And now I know why Alice thought this new development was so important to share with me. For the past two years, Alice has had to watch me go through guy after guy, all of them assholes according to her. She has had to watch me make mistakes, has watched my self-esteem become non-existent as I continued to perform depraved acts to way too many guys.

For Alice, I can imagine Edward being her only hope in "taming" me, in stifling the behaviour that scares her. Moreover, since she cares so much about me, I know she would also love to see me with a guy "deserving" of me.

Alice can be so blind sometimes.

Once Alice goes home to prepare for her date with her "guy", I crawl underneath my thick comforter.

My brain is still hooked on Edward's reaction to the clit piercing.

The damn clit piercing.

I groan, giving up on my attempt at blissful oblivion. My brain just won't stop.

I text Alice.

So, what's so great about Edward anyway? –B

Her response it almost immediate.

He is just so nice, Bella. And I don't mean boring-nice, I mean he is funny and accepting of everyone. Really, he is just a big goof. I don't know anyone who doesn't like him. He's like TJ on Recess. –A

Alice, you know I never had the Disney Channel growing up. I missed out on Recess. –B

You're missing the point, Bella! –A

But no, I know I'm not. I mean, if he is such a nice, awesome guy, then there is no chance whatsoever that he would want anything to do with me after he really got to know me. And even if he did, I would completely ruin him. I don't have the ability anymore to have feelings (yuck!) for guys, and I can't see Edward wanting just a casual fuck buddy.

Yeah… so not something that nice guys want.

And if Alice is such good friends with Edward, I'm sure she wouldn't want me to hurt him, right?

My phone buzzes once more, and I guess I didn't reply soon enough because it's Alice once more.

And don't you dare think that he is too good for you, Bella. You deserve the best guy in the world! –A

Erm…yeah.

Alice has a really scary ability to read my mind sometimes; her and Rosalie.

But I guess that's understandable considering how much I tell them. I mean, they know everything.

I think back to my phone call to Alice and Rosalie the morning after the "Cirque Du Solei Night", as we so kindly call it. Even back then, Alice and Rosalie could read through the lines.

So…? –A

What –B

How was the date, silly –A

Umm… -B

Is that a good 'umm'? –A

Let me phone you and Rose, Kay? –B

Yeah, yeah. Sure. –A

I dial Rose first, briefing her, and then connect with Alice.

"Hey."

"Hi."

"Hey! Out with it, Bella!" Alice says loudly, not one for patience.

"I…umm, lost some stars…"

Oh, the stars. I should probably explain that one.

I came up with the analogy a few years ago. See, a "five-star virgin" is a person who has never been kissed. And someone with no stars is no longer a virgin.

What the other stars represent can easily be filled in by your imagination.

"Whoa…" Rosalie says.

"How many?!" Alice shouts.

And I know I need to tell them, but how can I say it in a way that makes it okay?

I really want it to be okay.

Only…

Alice and Rosalie are bound to see through me.

So I suck it up, and just get it out there.

"All of them. All of them but one."

"Oh, Sweetie…"

That's Alice.

"Are you okay? Really?"

And that's Rosalie.

When I don't answer right away, because I really don't know what the answer is, Alice speaks again.

"We're picking you up."

And just like that, our conversation ends and I relax, knowing my girls will be here in only a matter of minutes.

Once Alice and Rosalie picked me up, safe to say I spilled the details of what had happened with quite a bit of description, probably more than they needed to hear. Hell, the girls even knew that I bled for a week after the painful fingering.

Rosalie and Alice took to calling James "Scissorhands" behind my back, and only disclosed that little nickname to me after the breakup that happened four weeks later.

So yeah, the girls can read me like a book.

And the fact that Alice, the person who really knows me better than anyone, thinks that Edward and I would be good together?

Well… it's a really scary thought.

A/N:

So…what do you think?

And by the way, Disney's Recess was a kickass show. Just sayin'.

Have a great day everyone!