Hello, its me. Aside from saying that I don't own the Marvel Universe, all I have to say is how sorry I am for not updating in ages. I am hoping to restart writing for this story and my other story Envy soon. Thank you to all the viewers that are still interested in this story and I'm sorry that this chapter isn't the best but enjoy!
It was a perfect day to go to the beach. Jack had been waiting for hours for his Dad to wake-up and take him to his favourite beach. Well, it was his Moms' favourite beach, but since she wasn't around to love it anymore, Jack took over the job. After a painful three hour wait and a further hour for his Dad to eat breakfast, the duo crammed themselves and their beach equipment into the car and set off for Coco Beach.
Once they arrived Jack scampered out the car taking his bucket and spade with him and secured himself a spot on the beach he deemed worthy. Clapping his hands in excitement the small boy reached down for his spade only to find it missing. Panicked, Jack spun his head in every direction trying to locate his lost tool.
"Looking for something?" Little Jack span round in fright before realising that his spade was being held out towards him. With a giant grin that showed his missing front teeth his chubby hands took the plastic tool and placed it carefully into his bucket.
"Thank y-" The little boy paused. Looking up at the owner of the hand, Jack became nervous. The woman in front of Jack reminded him of his Aunt Lila. This lady possessed the same bruises and cuts his Auntie used to get before she left his Uncle Jim. Jack never understood how or why she always fell over but every time she did, his Dad and Mom would cry and scream at each other and her. Even though Jack didn't understand, he began associating injuries like what the woman in front of him had with bad things. Understanding his fear, the woman simply smiled.
"You like hockey?" The southerner asked the small boy. Watching the child nod his head, she continued. "So do I," She indicated towards herself. "But it's a rough game," The woman began pointing at her injuries. Jack made an expression of understanding which caused the woman to smirk. "Well," The woman in the sundress took a step back. "I better leave you to your sandcastles." Without another word, the nice lady made her way down the beach. Jack watched her go and furrowed his eyebrows when she started walking towards a homeless man, though Jack didn't dwell on this for very long as his dad came into view with ice-cream.
Said woman made her way over to the homeless man, her flip-flops smacking against her heels with every step. With an exaggerated sigh, the woman plopped down beside the man. The man tensed at the sudden company.
"Nice view." The southern voice chirped from the Winter Soldiers right.
"I've seen nicer," His gruff voice croaked over the cool breeze. The more hostile he sounded the better.
"That must be nice." Bucky frowned at the strangers words. Adjusting his baseball cap further down his forehead Barnes glanced at the figure beside him before looking back at the sea. With a sigh Bucky wiped his face with a gloved hand before resting said hand under his chin.
"Mission?" Barnes questioned, though it sounded more like a statement than anything else.
"Handlers," His ex-partners accent switched back to its mainly used one. Even with years of practise she had never lost the slight lisp of her native tongue, though it was hardly noticeable unless you knew what to look for. Bucky turned to stare at his partner.
The girl before him sat with her legs curled into herself, resting her bruised neck and chin against her knees while watching the waves meet the sand.
"Four weeks, not bad." A wisp of a smile graced her face but quickly ceased when her cut lip began to reopen.
"This isn't a game!" Barnes growled at the girl. A swollen bloodshot eye acknowledged his outburst but soon returned to watching the sea.
"I know." Her voice sounded older, much older than her physical appearance. Something ordinary people might have called an 'old soul'. This filled the Winter Solder with rage. She was. Behind his partners young face was decades of pain and grief. So much pain cramped into one human body.
A person isn't capable of storing so much agony in one lifetime, a blank face had once told him in his younger days. They were partners after all. They had carried each other's hardships throughout their years of forced service to HYDRA.
"Our last mission," His partner began, taking a small envelope out of her handbag and held it out for Barnes to grab. "Is looking for you." The girl stated. Bucky quickly snatched the envelope and poured its contents onto the sand.
"Got himself a small team," The girl informed him while he sifted through the photographs obviously taken by his ex-partner. The Winter Soldier recognised very few faces following America's beloved hero, the only one he could confirm the identity of was the man with wings. "Nothing to worry over, a few false trails here and there fixed it." Bucky didn't know whether to be glad or somewhat disappointed. "I advise you don't go to Canada for the next couple of weeks. You wouldn't want to run into the star spangled hero." She cocked her head and narrowed her eyes at the once HYDRA assassin, trying to guess the emotions and thoughts that lay beneath the cold exterior.
"I don't know what to do." Bucky confessed before the Winter Soldier could stop him. "I'm not ready to face Ste- him." He stared down at his once beloved friend before leaving the photograph in the sand. "I-I can't go back. Not yet."
"You'll find a way." Was all she said.
"Ma used to say that." He couldn't help the grin that filled his face. Bucky remembered his Ma's voice, not how she appeared in person or if Bucky was her favourite kid or not, but it was a start. The girl gave a pained smile, from her injuries or from his words he couldn't tell.
"Family…" Her voice was distant and her eyes seemed to be gazing at something that Bucky couldn't see. Usually the Winter Soldier would have kept his mouth shut. Seen and not heard. However, with his new set of memories came a new set of behaviours that the soldier hadn't concurred yet.
"You had any relatives?" Bucky questioned before his HYDRA trained mind could stop him.
His partner seemed to snap out of her daydream. She turned her mismatched eyes towards him, piercing into the soul the Winter Soldier didn't know he possessed until his encounter with the man named Steven Rodgers. "I did once . . . they just didn't want me."
Bucky knew what it was like to be stabbed with a knife and it unnerved him that the feeling which curled and twisted in his chest felt so similar to a knife being turned in his skin. The Winter Soldier hadn't felt such emotion during his services to HYDRA . . . and it scared him. Emotions were unneeded and useless things that would interfere with missions. So to feel, to really feel after all those years of killing and torturing innocent and guilty people alike, it got to him. All those feelings that were suppressed and burred deep within a part of the solider he didn't know he had, began bubbling over, consuming all of Bucky's waking thoughts and dreaming slumbers.
"Why-" Bucky swallowed, trying to clear the burning sensation he felt in his throat. "Why do you stay?"
"Villains don't get happy endings, Winter." She made a sound that resembled a laugh. But years of having to maintain a cold exterior made it difficult for Winter and herself to express real genuine emotion. They had once, it seemed so long ago and faded that sometimes Bucky couldn't grasp whether it was a real or not real. But then he would shift his enhanced biotic arm and she would adjust herself so her skin wouldn't be in close contact with it. Then the blurriness would shift and the memories that seemed so dreamlike become so vivid and real that it made the Winter Soldiers gag reflex kick-in when he remembered the aftermath of their actions. Needles, electrotherapy, drowning, dissecting-
"I was born and raised by HYDRA." The statement forced the soldier back to reality. "I don't think- I know I wouldn't be able to live a life other than that." She sounded so sure. This bruised and beaten girl that gave Barnes his freedom thought she couldn't have any for herself.
Bucky wanted to comfort her, sooth her like his Ma used to do when he got bad dreams but HYDRA's programming became dominant again. Leaving the shell of a man whose name used to be Bucky with words he wished he could say but no power to do so.