DISCLAIMER:Justice League Unlimited and all related characters are the property of Time Warner, Inc. and DC Entertainment. No copyright infringement is intended. This work of fiction is for entertainment purposes only and no money has changed hands. The original characters and events are the sole property of the author and may not be used without permission. Superman created by Jerry Siegel and Joe Shuster. Batman created by Bob Kane. Wonder Woman created by William Moulton Marsden.
THE EDUCATION OF DIANA PRINCE
by Darrin A. Colbourne
The next morning Diana was up bright and early, though not earlier than Bruce, which surprised her. She wasn't sure exactly when he returned from his patrol of Chicago, but she'd have been surprised if he'd gotten more than a few hours of sleep, if he'd slept at all. That was just one of the things she pondered as she showered and brushed her teeth. She put it out of her mind when she emerged from the steamy bathroom later with towels around her body and hair.
In her bedroom she peeled off the body towel and put on a bra and panties. Normally she wouldn't have been be so modest, even around a man, but she was playing Bruce's girlfriend, so she supposed she should try to keep a little mystery in their relationship. Besides, the bra and panties were a matched set from a collection that Bruce's credit cards paid for and she wanted to show them off. (It was Dinah Lance's idea to take the cards to a Victoria's Secret store...)
Finally, dressed in her odd little hair towel/lingerie ensemble, she picked up her lasso and went to Bruce's room. His door was open. He was standing there fully dressed and ready for his day. His attention was fixed on the display of his cell phone.
She walked in with her head high and her ample chest out and smiled sweetly. "I'm ready," she said, trying to sound innocent and seductive all at once.
At least she got his attention. Bruce looked up from the device and locked in on her. Steely eyes scanned her up and down and lingered a wee bit on the flimsy lace garments covering a tiny percentage of her form. There was a hint of a smirk on his face...until his gaze rested on the towel. His eyebrow went up. "Hair still wet?"
Diana shrugged. "Normally I would just spin around really fast while I'm still in the shower. Dries me in seconds. I guessed you'd object to that, though."
"You guessed right. We have a perfectly good blow dryer. No need to use your powers for such a mundane task."
Diana sighed. "Yes, sir." She came close and offered the lasso. "Anyway, I'm ready."
Bruce took the rope and waited for Diana to raise her arms, then he coiled it around her waist until it looked like she was wearing a wide golden belt. "I hope you have something to wear that will hide this.
Diana nodded. "I do." She had a few empire waist tops that would work. The one she picked out for today was lavender with wide shoulder straps.
"Good." He finished binding her and she felt her powers fade away again. That was what it was like. A fading, though one so rapid she wouldn't have time to do anything heroic before she was...ordinary.
Bruce stepped back and put his hands on his hips. He looked her in the eye and asked "What's your mission for today?"
Diana stood up straight and responded. "Go out today. Eat, drink, shop, do business, but in all things interact, interact, interact. Report to you after hours at the gym for combat training."
"And who are you?"
"My name is Diana Prince."
"What name will you give other people?"
"I'll tell them I'm Diana Prince."
"And if Diana Prince should happen to see the Cheetah when she's downtown?"
Diana wavered only a moment. "Diana Prince will run, because Diana Prince is certainly not Wonder Woman and would have no reason to confront the Cheetah."
Bruce nodded. "Good enough. I'll see you tonight." With that he stepped around her and headed out of the bedroom. Diana heard the front door close a few moments later.
Back in her own bedroom, Diana laid everything she was going to need for the day out on her bed. There were lacy stockings to go with the lingerie she was already wearing, along with the empire-waist blouse, a thin black belt and a pair of dark blue flared jeans. She would check the weather report before deciding whether to wear the denim jacket she'd chosen or simply tie it around her waist. (Normally, she didn't notice temperature extremes, so worrying about hot or cold temps would be a new experience.) She wanted to be a little playful with her hair today, so she would be using a bright blue ribbon to add a ponytail. The last part of her ensemble - a pair of black leather high-heeled boots - sat neatly by the side of the bed.
She went back into the bathroom to fix her hair. She found the blow dryer in the cabinet below the sink and tried to brush her hair while she dried. She was clumsy, having trouble finding the coordination necessary to run a brush through her locks while aiming a jet of hot air at them. It took much longer than she'd expected to get her hair into a satisfactory state. She sighed as she looked at it in the mirror. I already miss spinning it dry, she thought, then put that thought aside as she put on her makeup.
She was back in her bedroom a few minutes later. She put on the stockings, pants, blouse and boots, then went into her closet to select a purse. The fact that she had to select a purse was Dinah's fault again. Diana had managed to get through the bulk of her young life without needing any purse at all, but on their shopping trip Dinah had insisted that she buy a variety of handbags to match various outfits. Diana had thought it insane at the time, but Bruce hadn't objected, so she assumed that it would help establish her new identity. She settled on a small black clutch, just big enough to carry her cell phone, wallet and keys. These she retrieved from the night stand by the bed.
Her last stop was the living room, where she turned on the TV to catch the local weather report. The day would be nice but a little cool. She'd need to wear the jacket, so she put it on and headed out the door.
Two floors down she ran into Mrs. Ramirez, a nice elderly woman who lived in the apartment just under theirs. "Good morning!" The woman said with a wide grin. "Getting out into the world today?"
"Yes I am," Diana said, smiling back. They'd moved into the building a week ago and in that time Diana had only left the apartment accompanied by Bruce. Today was her first day going "solo."
"Oh, that's wonderful, dear," Mrs. Ramirez said, patting Diana lightly on the shoulder. "To be perfectly honest, I was worried that man of yours was keeping you prisoner up there. So many crazy things happen in the world today..."
Diana suppressed a giggle. "No, it's nothing like that. I just...tend to be a homebody, but today I have to run some errands that Wayne won't have time for." It was a good enough cover story for being crafted on the fly.
"Good! I'll walk out with you." They continued down the stairs side-by-side as Mrs. Ramirez said, "I'm going to spend the day with my grandchildren. My son is waiting for me downstairs. He and my daughter-in-law have to be out all day, so I'm going to look after the young ones. It's a perfect opportunity to spoil them rotten."
This time Diana giggled along with Mrs. Ramirez. "That's the best part, spoiling them and giving them back," she said. It was just something she'd heard others say. She didn't know for sure, because she'd never babysat anyone else's children before.
It must have been the right thing to say, because Mrs. Ramirez nodded emphatically in agreement. "It is! It is! Sometimes I drive my son crazy, but I just say that's my revenge for all the times he drove me crazy!"
They giggled and continued chatting until they were on the street, where they parted ways. Mrs. Ramirez got into a moderate-sized sedan driven by a man a little older than Bruce. Diana waved goodbye to her neighbor as the car drove off, then started walking in the same direction. The first order of business was breakfast. She decided she'd have it at the Ishmael's that she and Bruce had been frequenting lately, since it was only a few blocks away. She didn't want to eat alone, though, so she pulled out her cell phone and called a number from her contacts. "Hi, it's Diana," she said. "I'm doing great. I was wondering if you were busy today. No? Would you like to have breakfast and spend the day with me? Wonderful! There's an Ishmael's about three blocks from where we're staying. Can you meet me there? Great! I'll see you in a little while."
She put the phone away and continued on in relative silence, saying only "Hi" or "Good Morning" to random strangers she passed, a dog-walker here, a commuter there. A jogger kept her attention for a few seconds as she wondered if she'd have to alter her exercise regimen to compensate for times when she had no powers. That thought made her look down. The blouse was doing its job. Her lasso was invisible to anyone who might be looking, but she felt it. It wasn't too tight around her midsection, but she realized there would be some times when it might make breathing an adventure. One more thing she'd have to talk to Bruce about.
At Ishmael's she stepped onto a line five-people deep, which was light traffic compared to rush hour at a typical franchise. As she stood she recalled Bruce's instructions the first time they had come here: Try to come here often. It's popular for various reasons and does a great deal of repeat business, so no one will think twice about seeing you on a daily or weekly basis. Also, you should try to pick a favorite drink as soon as you can. It's also normal for regulars to order the same drink when they come.
Hearing that had made her curious. "Can Wonder Woman frequent the same Ishmael's as Diana Prince?" She had asked.
"If you'd like," Bruce had said, "but Wonder Woman should never order the same thing as Diana's favorite. Pick a different favorite for Wonder Woman."
Diana had been incredulous. "So it's impossible for Diana Prince and Wonder Woman to have the same favorite drink at Ishmael's?
"No, but any association others can make between Diana Prince and Wonder Woman jeopardizes the secret identity, even the coincidence of both women liking the same coffee drink."
"So what's Batman's favorite coffee drink?"
Bruce had smirked. "Batman doesn't frequent Ishmael's. They're not open late enough."
Diana rolled her eyes as the conversation replayed in her head. It essentially meant she had to pick two favorite drinks in a place she'd never even been to before she started this project. Right now she was still trying to figure out what Diana Prince liked most. "Le Grande Espresso with half-and-half and a strawberry scone," she ordered when it was her turn.
She sat at a small table and waited for her company to arrive. For a moment she wondered what to do to keep herself busy, then she looked around the restaurant and saw that many of the patrons were using tablets and/or staring at the displays of smartphones. Observe others and pick up their habits Bruce had said. All right. She dipped into her clutch and pulled out her cell phone and turned it on. She stared into the display screen for a few minutes, just noting all the icons, then she touched the icon for the web browser. Now the homepage came up, and she found herself staring at it again, wondering what she should be browsing. Then she let curiosity dictate her actions, and she used the screen keyboard to type "Superman" into the search box. Her eyes widened a little when the search engine reported more than a hundred million results. She touched the result labeled "News for Superman." The results number reduced marginally. She scanned the first few links and saw they were all stories on dailyplanetdotcom.
She clicked on the first link and saw it was a story by Clark Kent reporting on Superman's recent battle with elements of Intergang using weapons stolen from S.T.A.R. Labs. Diana read the whole thing, intrigued at how Clark managed to write about himself in a life-or-death battle as if he were talking about a complete stranger. She almost giggled when she read the exclusive quotes Superman had granted Kent for the report. When she was done, she wondered idly if she could ever do the same thing. She usually avoided searching for herself on the 'net because for every positive entry there seemed to be a thousand commentaries chastising her for her mode of dress and penchant for solving problems with violence. If she didn't want to read negative things about Wonder Woman, it seemed impossible for her to write about herself objectively.
That thought made her delve into dangerous territory. She typed "Batman" into the search window and spent the bulk of her time absorbing the "News for Batman" links. Most were blog posts and commentaries and editorials excoriating Batman for his intense brand of vigilantism. Diana was shocked at the vitriol, especially from posters based in Gotham. She knew for a fact that Batman had saved the city countless times, just the way Superman continually saved Metropolis (often with much more property damage), but where Superman was hailed, Batman was scorned.
She also knew that Bruce liked it that way, so much so that one of the posts quoted Bruce Wayne offering his own scathing commentary about Batman's tendency to cause more problems than he solved. This quote seemed to be treated as gospel in more than one place. After all, when billionaire industrialist and philanthropist and very eligible bachelor Bruce Wayne takes Batman to task, his fellow Gothamites thought Batman had a responsibility to listen.
Diana shook her head at the insanity of it all.
"Hey, Diana!" Someone said. She looked up and found Dinah Lance standing by the table.
Diana smiled at her. "You got here sooner than I expected," she said.
Dinah shrugged. "I got a lift from the 'Tower," she said, meaning the Watchtower's teleporters. "Wait a minute while I get something." She put her shoulder bag on the empty chair and went to stand on line.
Diana observed her closely as she walked away. Dinah was wearing white skinny jeans and a white tank top with a black leather jacket and black strappy heels. Her hair was just as black as the jacket and shoes and it was cropped short. Diana fixated on that hair, realizing now that it was one of Dinah's secret identity distractions.
After all, The Black Canary had long blond hair. It was a wig, of course, but it fit so well and was styled so perfectly that everyone assumed it was her natural hair, and those who thought about it assumed that if she had a secret identity, that woman would also have long blond hair. So the pretty woman with the natural black crop-cut now ordering a blond roast and a bacon and egg sandwich couldn't possibly be the Canary.
If only they could hear her scream.
Dinah came back to the table with her food and coffee and sat down. "So, how's it going so far?" she asked when she was settled.
"So far, so good, I guess," Diana said. "I'm supposed to be out on my own today, but I got a little scared and wanted to have some company."
"Not a problem," Dinah said. "Two girls mean twice the ability to spend lots more of Bruce's money."
Diana blinked. "Not that much more. The only cash he gave me is for a specific use, and the credit card I have has a thousand dollar limit."
Now Dinah blinked. "Seriously? Let me see." Diana took the card and handed it over. It was a plain credit card. "Is he kidding? He's got like a thousand gold cards! Didn't he let us use one to set you up?"
"He said as of right now we're two average people with financial limits, not foreign royalty and one of the Fortune 500, so we have to live within average people's means."
Dinah handed the card back with a huff. "Obviously it's just an excuse to be cheap. Ollie tries to pull that same stunt all the time."
"How is Ollie?" Diana asked, changing the subject.
"Oh, he's fine. He got a little banged up when we took on Shado last week, so he's recuperating at his home in the Hamptons."
"And you're not helping him recuperate?"
A sigh. "I'm working a case. I can't take an extended break while I have hot leads. Still, I can spare the day to spend with you. So, what's on the agenda?"
"Nothing much. I'm supposed to go shopping for food and household items, then go clothes shopping for myself. Later I have to meet Bruce at the gym for fight training…"
"You already know how to fight…" Dinah protested.
"Don't ask," Diana sighed. "Anyway...oh. I have to open a bank account. That's what the cash Bruce gave me is for."
Dinah blinked. "Wait...so you have to go to a bank?"
"Well, yes. We'll go there first. It shouldn't take long."
Dinah's eyebrow went up. "Diana, when was the last time you've been in a bank?"
"Just two weeks ago," Diana said, confused by the question.
Dinah shook her head. "Let me rephrase: When were you last in a bank for purposes other than going amazon on some idiot trying to rob it?"
Diana blushed. "Oh. Never, I suppose…"
"Right. I'm gonna get another coffee. I'm going to need a caffeine jolt if we're going to do time in a bank."
"It won't be quick?"
Dinah just chuckled as she got up and headed back to the counter line.
Diana just watched her and thought, I guess I have a lot more to learn than I realized...
TBC...