Jim was late for the sunday lunch. He hated being late, he was not supposed to work that sunday but Flo called him and ask him to go to deal with some teens that had broken into a store looking for alcohol. He felt glad when finally he was free to go to the Byers home. Sundays and thursdays were his favorite days of the week. and he knew that was related to how well he and El fit with the Byers. They were always welcomed and treated with kindness. They had such a beautiful dynamic that he find himself thinking about them like a family.

- Sorry i'm late, i brought ice cream. - He told the kids as he entered the kitchen to put the ice cream in the freezer. Joyce and he have that costume, whoever who was late had to bring dessert. - Where's Joyce? - He asked. Jonathan was cooking something and Eleven and Will were sitting very quietly on the table.

- I don't know. She went for a walk and hadn't come back yet. - Jonathan answered.

- She was sad. - Eleven said feeling worried.

- I think she miss Bob, she kept looking to the draw i made of him. - Will explained pointing out the draw of hero Bob that was on the fridge.

- Eight months. - He realized as he remembered the date.

- What? - Asked Jonathan confused.

- Is been eight months since Bob died. - He answered. - Okay, i think i know where she is, i'm going to look for her and we'll be back so we can have lunch. - He informed his decision.

Jim took his van and drove to the cemetery. Just like he thought he found her at Bob's grave. He remembered how she used to this when they were teens, she would went to the cemetery in lots of special dates to visit her mother, specially on her birthday (He never did that with Sara. Maybe he should someday?). Now she was doing the same with Bob. Maybe that was her way of grieving. She was sitting in the grass and she looked lost in her head. She looked so little there that he wanted to protected her from all the bads in the world. He didn't know if interrupting her was a good idea, but he didn't want to leave her alone with her thoughts because he knew from his experience how dangerous that could be.

- Hey. - He said approaching her.

- Hi. - She said surprised that she wasn't alone anymore.

- You're late for lunch. - He told her as he sits next to her.

- I'm sorry, i guess i kinda lost notion of the time. - She apologized and light a cigarette. - Why are you here? - She asked.

- The kids were worried. - He answered accepting the cigarette. Sharing cigarettes was definitely their thing and he loved it.

- I mean, how did you know i was here? - She asked what really was making her wonder.

- It's eight months since Bob... - He told her as he passed her the cigarette. - You used to did this with your mum too, it made sense. - He explained.

- I still visit her on her birthday. - She said returning her sight to the grass and blushing because she felt stupid about doing that.

- It's okay. - He assured her. - You're grieving, is okay if you miss him and wanted to visited him somehow. - He tried to reason with her so she didn't have to feel embarrassed, at least not with him in anyway. - I never visited Sara. - He confessed feeling sad.

- They stayed in silence for a while and he's glad. He was grateful that she didn't ask about Sara, that she understood that this was not him trying to talk about her daughter. He didn't think he could talk about her yet anyway, it still hurt too much. So he was grateful that she would only take of him what he could give, that she wouldn't pressure him even if maybe it would had helped her to took away her mind from Bob.

- I'm not grieving. - She broke the silence once the cigarette was over.

- Okay. - He said even if he didn't quite believe her.

- Is the quilt. - She finally admitted.

- You feel guilty about Bob's death? - He asked surprised. Because he wasn't expecting her to blame herself, although he may been expecting that she blame him at some point. He was the chief of police and he couldn't save him.

- He was there because he loved me. - She said, her voice braking a little as she started crying silent tears.

- It wasn't your fault, he chose to be brave and saved all of us, he knew the risk. - He made her remember. - The demodogs killed him, not you. If someone is to blame here it should be the lab and the government. - He insisted, he needed her to knew that.

- But i didn't love him back… I mean i loved him, but i wasn't in love with him. - She said very quietly, like she was afraid of her own words. - If i would had been honest to him about it maybe he wouldn't had to deal with my problems and monsters from others dimensions. - She explained what had been troubling her.

He found himself in shock. He had never expect that. Joyce hadn't been in love with Bob? How he didn't have realized that? Maybe he really did disappear for a while when he was hiding Eleven.

- That's why Jonathan didn't like him. I mean it was stupid that he didn't because Bob was a good man, but he didn't like him because he could tell that i wasn't in love with him. And he wants me to be with someone i love, so... - She rumbled. - You must be thinking i'm a terrible person. - She hide her face with her hands feeling horrible.

- No, of course not. - He said as fast as he could. - You're actually one of the best persons i know. - And he was really being honest.

- He could have been safe in Maine. I didn't wanted to move out with him, so he stayed. But if i would had tell him i wasn't in love with him maybe he would be safe in Maine. - She said crying harder.

He took her hands out of her face, dry a couple of her tears with his big hands and then he just hugged her. That was the best he had to offer, a warm and safe hug. He held her as she cried all she needed to do. He was surprised to found out that Bob had offered her to move out to Maine, but he was glad she didn't. He couldn't imagine his life in Hawkins without her. Once she was calmed she stayed in his arms feeling too comfortable to move, so he caressed her back and played with her hair to give her some more time.

- I'm sorry. - She apologized when she let herself be able to talk again.

- Don't be, you don't have or need to. - He assured her. - Or maybe you do, but with yourself. You need to forgive yourself so you can't stop blaming yourself for things you didn't have control. - He gave her the only advice he thought it could help.

- Did you forgive yourself for Sara? - She asked with curiosity.

- I don't know, sometimes i think these days is more a yes than a no. - He honestly answered.

- Come on, i think is time for lunch. - She said grabbing to his body to help herself to stand up.

They drove in silence and when they got to her home it was all noise and laughs again. The kids had that kind of magic on her, that he couldn't stop admiring. She would do anything for the kids, even turned off her trouble mind for a while and let herself be okay in the moment to not worried them. She was so strong, but he didn't think she realised that. She was so confusing, like she could be fire and rain at the same time. But no matter what, she always kept going. Her determination to kept going no matter what life throw at her made her look like some kind of warrior in his eyes. He wish he could be as resilient as her.

Jim and Eleven stayed all the afternoon, and only left when it was starting to get dark and Jim insisted that it was time for them to go. Eleven stayed silent as he drove, but he could tell that the girl was into something. She kept looking at him with a rare wonder, almost as she was trying to read him, like she knew something that he didn't. But he had learned that she would talk when she was ready, so he gave her time.
He actually learned that from Joyce, from watching how she interacted with kids. She always was patient with her sons and the other kids, always let them had their time to figure out their feelings and thoughts. Always listened them and explained things considering them as real persons. And most of the time it worked, they would share their worries once they could find a way to expressed them. The people in Hawking only saw her as a symbol of anxiety, but he could see through that. After everything she had been through it was normal that she felt anxious sometimes. But what he admired was that she didn't let that define her, she pushed back. And when it was about her sons and the other kids she was always patient, no matter how anxious she was feeling. He didn't know how she learned to control her feelings like that, but it was kinda impressive.

- Do you love Joyce? - Eleven asked.

- Of course i do, she's my friend. - He answered. He knew that was not what she meant, but he was so surprised with the question that he tried to avoid it.

- I meant more than friends. - She clarified. - Do you love her like i love Mike and Jonathan loves Nancy? - She tried, asking with a different approach.

- Joyce and i, we are friends. We love each other as friends. - He answered.

- I think there's more. - She said with confidence.

- Why? - He needed to know because he was starting to feel irritated. They were just friends and he needed Eleven to understand that.

- I have eyes, i can see the way you two look and care for each other. - Eleven explained.

- Because we are friends. - He insisted.

- Okay. - She accepted, but he could tell that she quite didn't believe him.

He wasn't in love with Joyce, right? He loved and care for her because she was her friends and because she was probably her favorite person in all the little stupid town they lived in. He had been jealous about Bob, he admitted that to himself. But because he was scared to lose her, like that she being with someone romantically would meant they couldn't friends anymore. But it wasn't like that. She had still been present, shared her worries of the Upside Down with him and relied on him. He shouldn't had been jealous when he was the one who disappeared, not her. And now… Now their friendship felt stronger, all the time they were spending together felt special and made him felt she was closer to him than any other person. They understood each other, they shared traumas, and they were the first person they would ask for help when they needed it. And they shared memories of childhood and teens years. That was it, that was all.

Two weeks later it was time to move out for the Hoppers. Jim had finally found a house he liked and could paid. He wanted to give a home to Eleven, and he thought it would be better for her to live near the town instead of the middle of the wood. Eleven was happy since the moment he told her his idea, and that made him felt like he was doing a good choice. Joyce, Jonathan, Nancy, Steve, and the party helped them move out all their staffs It was a little chaotic with so many people around trying to help but they made it work.

He had to leave at some point in the afternoon because they called him from the station. When he came back to his new home everyone had left, except the Byers. He found them in Eleven's room, painting the walls with colorful drawings. Joyce was trying to make them sing a punk song with her, but they were just listening and laughing. He enjoyed watching them, that was a perfect moment he wanted to remember.

- Hi, you're back! - Eleven came running to him for a hug when she realised of his presence.

- Yes, i'm back and i brought dinner. - He said hugging her with a smile.

- Do you like how my room looks? - Asked eleven.

- Is very colorful. - He answered looking the walls.

- That was my idea. - Will informed blushing a little because he felt embarrassed.

- Because colors makes you feel happy and not sad. - Eleven explained.

- It's nice. - He assured the kids.

- Want to help us finish? - Joyce asked offering him a brush.

- With painting or singing? - He teased her.

- Come on, i know you like sex pistols too. - Joyce said with a small smile.

- Oh, not you too please. - Jonathan complained and Joyce laugh at that.

He laughed too because her laugh was really contagious. He liked seeing her this relax and happy. Before he could realise what was happening she painted his nose with the brush he hadn't take from her. All the kids laughed and that was when he knew there had to be consequences. He grabbed one of the paint cans and started chasing Joyce with it around the room. And that was how the painting war started. It was really fun and they laughed a lot. He couldn't remember when was the last time he felt that young and alive.

After they had cleaned and finished the room, they went to the dining room to eat the dinner he had bought. And that was the moment he realised Eleven was right. There, as he looked at Joyce eating a cold pizza with her clothes stained with painting and a sincere shining smile on her face; he realised he was in love with her. Was he in love with her again or did he never stopped loving her? He was confused at that, but it didn't matter. He loved her and he should be panicking at that realization. And then she laughed again with the kids as they kept making jokes, and his heart jumped in his chest with so much strength that scared him for an instant, making him think that the others will heard. Fuck, he was really screwed.