A/N: I'M BACK! Sorry for the long wait, hope I can make it up to you with this chapter, the reason I didn't post another chapter was because I lost all will to write BUT after watching countless interviews of Jhonen Vasquez I feel ready to write again. I will try to post a chapter every Saturday seeing that I am also curious as to how this will play out…NOW ENOUGH ABOUT PHILOSOFY ON WITH THE STORY!
Disclaimer: I still don't own Invader Zim, I only own Dim unless someone is willing to buy her, and in that case I'm all up for negotiating….Come on people! She only costs fifty cents!
Dim: HEY! YOU'RE TRYING TO SELL ME…AND FOR FIFTY F****** CENTS!
Me: Sheesh! Calm down, I'm only trying to make a profit here.
Dim: Why the h*** would you need fifty cents for?
Me: To buy stuff, DUH!
Dim: That's just…*face palms* you know what; I'm not even going to go there.
Me: FIFTY CENTS! IF YOU BUY RIGHT NOW I'LL EVEN ADD IN HER VOOT CRUISER!
Dim: MY CRUISER?
Me: *ignoring Dim* IT RUNS GREAT AND IT EVEN HAS A SNACK MACHINE, THIS IS A LIMITED TIME OFFER!
Dim: *speaks so calm it's almost spooky* You can't sell me. You need me for this PITIFUL story so I'm just going to go now. *leaves the room*
Me: Damn! She's right, I can't sell her! *a few minutes pass by and everything is silent –cue crickets chirping-* HEY! MY STORY'S NOT PITIFUL! It just needs a little work that's all. *runs off after Dim, arms flailing in the air like a maniac*
"Gir! Get down from there and give me my disguise! I need to get to the skool, if not our cover will be blown!" Currently Gir was on top of the TV with ALMIGHTY ZIM'S brilliant disguise on his hands, he had been acting even more insane since he came back from spying on the Dib yelling something about a pretty lady giving him tacos.
"I don't wanna!" Yelled the crazy SIR unit as he grabbed some cables from the ceiling and dangled from them.
"COMPUTER!" Screamed a very angry Zim as he finally gave up on trying to reach Gir.
"Whaaaaaaat?" The computer responded clearly annoyed by the fact that they bothered him.
"Get Gir down from there!" The computer sighed but nevertheless complied with his master's request…or tried to anyway. A long mechanical arm came out from behind the portrait of the green monkey and tried grabbing a hold of Gir but he moved out of the way therefore the arm grabbed nothing but air and seeing that he wasn't gonna get him anytime soon the arm retreated back to behind the portrait.
"TACOOOOSSS!" Gir screamed while laughing as he let go of the cables and fell face down on the floor.
"Floor make me a sammich!"
Zim wasted no time seeing that Gir was on the floor and he grabbed his "brilliant" disguise. Gir then stood up and ran to the underground lab screaming something about man-eating cupcakes.
"Now I shall head to the learning facility and put my plan into action." Zim said very proud of himself "I will finally get rid of the Dib-hiooman." Zim then exited his base laughing maniacally forgetting that he dropped his disguise on the floor as he started rambling on and on about his new plan. A couple seconds later the door opened and Zim walked in once more.
"Also, don't let anyone in." He then turned to leave once again still completely unaware he was missing his disguise, but before he could open the door and leave his computer stopped him.
"Wait…" At this Zim's antennae perked up and he turned his head back, wanting to know why he was stopped.
"There better be a good reason why you stopped the AMAIZING ZIM from getting to the skool! ZIM WAITS ON NO ONE AND THE BRILLIANT PLAN NE-"
"You do know you don't have your disguise on, right?" Said the computer, exasperated by his master's stupidity. Zim's eyes widened as he saw his disguise on the floor and he quickly put it on.
"Of course Zim knew that! How dare you think the GREAT ZIM could forget something as important as his disguise." Zim said stubbornly, trying to cover his mistake. "The great Zim was merely testing how well you…pick up on things and you passed. THE ALMIGHTY ZIM NEVER FORGETS ANYTHING; ZIM IS THE PERFECT INVADER…" Zim continued to ramble on and on about how perfect he is but the computer simply blocked him out. After what seemed like hours the computer finally interrupted Zim's monologue, something Zim wasn't too fond of.
"Shouldn't you be at skool by now?"
"YES! NOW, THE GREAT ZIM SHALL HEAD OFF TO SKOOL AND LEARN MORE ABOUT THIS DIRT-BALL PLANET FULL OF NASTY…DIRT!"
"Yeah…you go on and do that…" Was the only answer the computer could come up with and the only one that didn't insult his "master".
"I'm telling you Gaz, I'm not crazy. This is has to be what Zim's been working on, I just know it. He wants to confuse me, that's why he sent that Irken to our house." I just didn't understand why Gaz couldn't see the Irken, she had been in the room with her, maybe she had been using cloaking technology but that didn't explain why I could see her, it was all just so confusing.
"Dib if you don't shut the fuck up I will plunge you into a nightmare world from with there is no waking!" I shuddered at Gaz's threat, and I shut up. The silence lasted all the way to 'hi skool' where we parted ways until lunch. I didn't see Zim around, I really needed to confront him, you know about the whole 'female Irken' thing. Seeing I was still a friendless outcast I made my way to my classroom alone only stopping once in a while to search for Zim but just as I rounded a corner I ran into the school bully, Torque, who violently shoved me against the lockers.
"Watch where you're going faggot!" I cringed in fear already knowing he was gonna inflict some pain before he left for his class.
"Ugghhff" was all a could manage as his fist connected with my stomach again and again as if I were a punching bag, each strike knocking the air out of me.
"That will show you to pay attention to where you going." Torque said punching me one last time before he turned away from me and walked off. I leaned on the lockers for support as struggled to catch my breath, when my breathing finally returned to normal I slowly made my way to my locker and then to the classroom clutching my stomach from the pain, there would definitely be some bruises there tomorrow.
A/N: AWWW…I wanted this chapter to be longer but if I didn't post it now it would be up until next week. This chapter isn't very important but I promise next chapter will be, and Dim didn't show up because…I…kinda…lost her after the whole selling her thing so if you see her be sure to tell me. NOW REVIEW OR I WILL MELT YOUR FACE OFF OR SOMETHING!(Now if you excuse me I'll just start writing next chapter before I lose my inspiration.)