"Hi." I said softly.
A smile appeared on the man's face. He had crinkles forming around the corner's of his eyes. "I thought you needed some company." He said, innocently.
I opened the door wider, letting the man come inside. I watched as his muscles rippled on the back of his Chicago Fire Department shirt. My breath hitched. Lust was filling the inside of my eyes. I could taste the impurity coming from my mouth. I closed the door, leaning on it. I watched as he turned around, mischievous eyes seeping through the pupils.
"So, why did you really come, Severide?" I asked curiously. Silence filled the room as I waited for his answer.
"I guess, I wanted to tell you, I'm sorry, I'm sorry for not returning your calls or being there for you when you needed it. I'm sorry for being a douche bag. I'm sorry I'm not good at this." He twirled his fingers around as he kept talking. It was the first sign I learned in the academy. He's nervous.
I bit my lower lip, trying not to give in to temptations. I knew better not to go back on this path. I knew Severide would be a good man, but something was off. Instead of love filling my heart, it was lust. The lust where I just wanted to rip off his clothes and paint the town red, but I knew better. I knew not to go back to my old ways. I knew I wanted more than just an one night stand. I wanted a man that kept me safe. Safe from the monsters that were creeping in.
My heart sank from the idea of what I was about to do. "I'm sorry, Kelly." I looked at him with eyes of sadness. His last hope was me, but I couldn't be that girl he wanted me to be. I couldn't save him from his womanizer ways, because someone else was trying to save me. "I think I want to be alone right now." I softly said.
Severide searched my face for any further answers. Being under his gaze got me uncomfortable, I shifted my weight from one foot to the other. "It's Jay, isn't it?" He asked. There was no animosity in his voice, just pure curiosity. The hesitation coming from my side wasn't really helping my case. "It's okay, Erin. I'm not upset or anything, I kind of saw it coming. Just promise me something, okay?"
I looked at him, waiting from him to press on.
"Don't push him away." I kinked my eyebrows, hoping he could elaborate. He laughed lightly at my confusion. "You're a tough girl, but you have a tendency to only let a few people in. I know, you trust Jay, but giving him your heart is different than letting him have your back. Go with your gut and give it your all. Don't let fear interfere with something good." Kelly walked towards me, kissing the top of my head. "You be careful, Erin Lindsay. I'm rooting for a happy ending."
I smiled, moving away from the door. He walked passed me, opening the door to leave. I leaned on the door, watching him leave my apartment. "Take care of yourself, too, Kelly. Alright? You're a great guy, you deserve happiness." I smiled at him. He turned around giving me a wave and then finally leaving my vision.
I closed the door to the last chapter of my bad side. The side where I always gave in to people that filled my fantasies. The people I knew were total players, but deep down had a big heart, I always gave in to them, but this time, I didn't want that. I wanted a guy that was good all around. I walked towards my bedroom door; the door that was opening a new chapter of my life.
It was a new investigation about high-end rollers being shot, but that wasn't what made this investigation different. It was the undercover partner we had to deal with. Pulpo, the son of a bitch that kidnapped Antonio's son. There was high tension filling the room when he entered in his yellow prison suit. All hands on deck for him to leave, but we had a job to do. Emotions, aside. It was time to work.
Voight looked at Jay and I. "You two go look for more information about Pulpo. I want everything that police officers couldn't find. We need leverage." Voight demanded.
We nodded and headed to the front of the station. "I know a guy that can hack into any computer database, he's house arrest."
"Okay, let's go." We headed out of the police station towards my car. I beeped it and slide right into the car. Jay followed in pursuit, punching in his address in my GPS. I drove off, following the directions the GPS told me. "Isn't it crazy we're working with Pulpo?" I asked trying to make small talk.
"Do you trust him?" Jay asked.
"Not one bit." I admitted.
Jay nodded, "Yeah, me either."
Silence, again, but this time I didn't need to fill in the space with small talk. The comfort of driving and Jay being by my side felt good. I didn't need to put up a front for him to show I was tough. He knew I was tough, he knew I could handle this and that's what made my appreciation grow for him. He saw me at my worst, but still acted as if I was tough.
"So, Severide stopped by last night." I said.
Why did you just say that, Erin? What were you thinking telling him this? Why would he care and what made you say it in the first place?
"Oh." Jay stated. Oh? Oh? What does that even mean?
"I figured I'd let him down easy and not give in to his womanizer ways. I set him loose, Jay."
I looked at the corner of my eyes, his lips hitching in a smirk. "Well, then. I guess it's my turn to pursuit." He said, half-jokingly.
I rolled my eyes, laughing. "We'll see if your ways can win me over."
"Is that a challenge I hear, Erin Lindsay? I hope you know I always win at challenges."
"Please, I know for a fact you weren't the best at sports." I said, matter-of-factly.
He leaned in close to my ear, whispering. His hot breath sending chills down my spine. "Sure, I'm bad at sports, but I never give up." I parked the car in front of the house. I turned my head, our faces inches away. He looked at me with eyes filled with determination and a hint of something else. "I won't give up on you, Erin Lindsay." He said, breathily. The double meaning on his words filled my insides with nerves. His eyes slowly moved to my lips, his face pulling in closer and closer.
That's when I knew, I knew I was about to kiss Jay Halstead, my partner. Fear started rising in my body. The fear of Voight finding out, the fear of messing up, the fear of not doing my job, I pushed my head away from his by opening the door swiftly.
"Okay, uhm, let's go inside." I said, quickly, getting out of the car.
I looked down at my hands. They were shaking tremendously. I felt footsteps from behind and I did what I had to do. I slid them into my pockets and walked up towards the house with a new face. A face of determination to finish this investigation.