Song for Chapter: So Far Away by Staind.

Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight, Stephenie Meyer does.

Whoo! 2011! Happy New Year everybody :)

Chapter Three: So Far Away

BPOV

"Now honey, if you need anything else, or if I forgot to give you something, then you just call me I will only be in the next room, okay?" Esme asked as she handed me a change of clean clothes and some shampoo and a toothbrush.

She was such a nice, loving women and always gave off this really motherly feel, when I was around her. That's saying something because, well, I havn't had a mother in... a really long time I guess.

"Thank you, Esme. Really I won't need anything more," I said giving her a small smile. She smiled and left me to clean off.

I turned to figure my suroundings and was met with a very large bedroom. It was quiet obvious that this family was rich, what with the massive house, amazing design, and well everything about the house screams rich. I'm beginning to think that this was the Cullens home. But if it was, weren't there two brothers?

I got the water running and hot then got to showering. I lathered my hair in some rasberry scented shampoo, and scrubbed myself clean.

Where do I sleep? It doesn't feel right to take over somebody elses home. I really am glad that boy had saved me. Oh, that boy wasn't even a boy, he was Adonis in the flesh. His bronze hair, and deep, emereld eyes, perfect jaw line, high cheeck bones and flawless face, beautiful he was beautiful and I could go on forever. But that didn't matter because I'm not even supposed to be thinking that.

What is wrong with me? Why am I thinking that a guy I don't even know, is beautiful? Well I can't deny the fact that he is but that still doesn't give me a right to think that.

I let the warm water relax me, soothe me, as much as possible. I wanted my mom and dad, not the dad that abused me, not the mom that left me and didn't know a thing about me, I wanted my old loving parents. My attempts at trying to remember how my life used to be were futile. It was useless and I had given up on that a long time ago, when I realised that Charlie was not going to change and I was to blame for my mother leaving.

Although I couldn't help but think that it wasn't entirely my fault, because the night that everything changed I had just been helping mom get the dinner ready. When we had finally sat to have dinner, she said something, something that changed all of our lives but ruined mine. I don't think she was even thinking of me because she just broke it to us and argued with Charlie then left, and ever since then I havn't seen her, don't know anything about her.

I realised I must have been in here for far too long but Esme was too nice to say anything, if she was still there. I shut the water, grabbed the towel and hopped out almost falling but caught onto the sink. Somethings just don't go away.

I grabbed the clothes that I had put by the sink, consisting of too short shorts and a tank top that said 'Beauty Sleep' on it. I doubt Esme would wear something like this, but I silently thanked her anyway. I didn't want to wear something too revealing, I felt ugly with the bruises and scars hidden, I wasn't going to feel good showing them to everybody.

People ask questions, it's like a reflex reaction when they notice things that are just so blatenly obvious. And I wasn't expecting Esme to be any different. Don't get me wrong Esme has been an amazing person since I first saw her but people can be curious.

When I was fully dressed I took a deep breath and put my hand on the door nob, not like I can stay in here forever, although that does sound apealing right now. I stood in the hallway, there were so many doors and Esme had said she was in the next room. I never thought I would see the day where I would get lost in a house, although in my defense this place is more of a mansion.

There were five rooms on my right going down the hall and across from that there were four rooms and on the far side there was another stair case, behind me was the staircase that led me to the first floor, so basically three floors and lets hope that there isn't another staircase up there. I don't want to go down I can hear the television and I didn't want to go down and give whoever was there a show of my bruises when that can be avoided. I sighed.

"Esme," I whispered. I stood there feeling so weird, it was like talking to yourself. I only whispered but my voice echoed slightly in the silence.

"Esme," I called again a little louder. I heard a noise and turned in the direction it came from. Esme stepped out of the third door on my left, she motioned for me to join her. I walked into the room. It was huge just like about everything else in this house. When I first stepped in the first thing I noticed was the wall sized glass covering the wall when you first walk in. It was beautiful, it looked out onto the greeness of Forks and a river that seemed to run on and on until it dissapeared behind the forest.

There was a big king sized bed in the centre of the room with two small bedside tables on either side of it and a plush, warm carpet that sunk in when you stepped on it, so comfortable. My revery was broken by the sense of being watched, I turned and found Esme still standing by the door, staring at my arms and legs and my now very revealed shoulder. When she noticed me looking at her she looked away quickly but I had already noticed her watching me. I was hurt but I did not expect the reaction I got. I heard Esme sniffle.

"Esme," I whispered, she still wouldn't turn.

"It's fine, you can look I don't mind," I said but I did mind I just didn't want her to think that she can't talk to me like she was when I first came in and all she knew I had was a sore shoulder. She turned to face me slowly and from the faint light coming from the moon, I noticed a sparkle at the corner of her eye. She was crying?

"Oh Bella," she said her voice breaking. I definitely did not expect this. I walked to her slowly and stood infront of her. Do I hug her? She didn't give me a chance to contemplate. She grabbed me into a tight hug making me wince slightly. She noticed and let me go apologising profusely. I wasn't going to cry, not now, not infront of Esme.

"You poor thing." she said pulling me to her more gently. That and she didn't know how I got these bruises, I was not going to say anything right now. As if Esme read my mind she decided to leave me to rest.

"You must be exhausted," she said walking to the door. "You can rest here," she said pointing at the large bed."Do call if you need anything, anything at all." Then she was gone and the door shut. I stood in the centre of the room, staring out at the moon and scattered stars. I hadn't noticed before but next to the oversized walk in closet there was a large bathroom.

I walked to the bed and sat at the edge of it. I felt like I was going to explode. Even though Charlie was gone for now, how was I to know he hadn't gone looking for me. If not for my own good then to hurt me more. How do I get away from that if he trys again. I can't stay with this family forever and I knew that but it felt right to stay. Again why am I thinking that? Because ever sinse I walked or more like stumbbled in to this house I have felt a lot of things. One being that it felt right, perfect when I fell into that boys arms, and when he wrapped his arms around my waist. I felt safe.

The tears I had been holding in when Esme was here spilled over. I said I wasn't going to cry and here I am doing the exact opposite.

I lifted the covers and crawled into the bed, and it sunk in with my weight. I lay in the middle and sobbed silently. I always lay in the middle of a bed, I felt as safe as I could possibly ever be. Like the bed could swollow me up and I wouldn't have to worry about reality, or any problems.

I pushed my knees up to my chest and wrapped my arms around them. I turned to my right to face the glass wall. I drifted off to sleep while I was gazing out at the moon.

(Bella's dream)

I was in the same dark room and I could hear the shouting and screaming, I slid down the door or wall in the room and put my hands up to my ears to block out the noise, it didn't help. I might as well have been asking them to shout louder. It was pitch black and I couldn't even see my fingers infront of me. But I could sense a presense behind me and whoever it was put a hand on my shoulder. I opened my mouth to scream, but whoever it was put a hand over my mouth and the sound came out muffled.

I thrashed and tried to scream again, but the person that was holding onto me was still behind me, with each arm wrapped around each side of me, keeping me from turning. I started sobbing and sobbing.

I ran from that room to get away, to hide, not to be ... well I don't know what this person was doing or going to do to me, but I didn't like it and I wanted to be let go.

"Please, Please," I begged while still crying. "Let me go." Nothing, the person didn't even budge, didn't breathe like he was holding his breath, but why?

"Sssh." he said. No, what was he going to do to me? Who was he? His grip tightened on me.

"Who are you?" I asked my voice noticeably breaking.

"I am-"

I woke up gasping. I looked around me, where was I? I took in my surroundings and everything came rushing back to me and I cried. I cried because I was scared, I cried because everything was wrong, my life was wrong, I cried because of that nightmare, I cried because I had to but most of all I just cried because I wanted him. I wanted him and he wasn't there.

But I shoudn't want him because it's wrong and I don't know him. And I wanted to be in his arms but I wanted to do it on purpose and not fall into them. I wanted him to hold me and I didn't want to have to have the bed keep me safe because it wasn't even doing that much.

.

I don't know his name, but I want to. I don't know him. I'm not allowed need him but I do and it scares me. But I'm plain and broken and have too much baggage, no guy would want that and he's Adonis so he definitely won't want that.

I had the same dream I always have but there was something, no somebody new in it. I didn't like this person, but he wouldn't let me go, all I wanted to do was get away from everything and he had to come along and basically just hold me, but it made me uncomfortable and I wanted to run some place else, anywhere away from him.

I looked out and realised it was still dark outside, the clock above the bed said it was 4:30 AM I had only gotten three and a half hours of sleep. I had to try to sleep. Again, like before, I turned to face the glass in the middle of the bed like it will always be.

But I couldn't sleep.

My thoughts kept running back to him. I don't know if I should have been worried about this, but I was relishing in it, just the simple thought of him.

My eyes started drooping, and I knew I was going to fall asleep but this time and the first time in almost years, I slept without nightmares. It would have been better with him there, but I couldn't ask for more if he was going to be in my dreams. If that's all I'm getting then I'm willing to take it.

And so I dreamed of him.

A shout out to whoever can guess who it was in Bella's nightmare :)