Lethe

Oblivion

The next several days passed quietly. Blair heard stories of her past while Chuck struggled to recover, working to grow stronger under the loving gaze of Blair's photo next to his bed. They were mending.

Soon Blair was able to return home. Curled up in bed with Louis, only a couple weeks from the wedding now, she asked him again about her past with Chuck.

Louis sighed a little, "You won't stop until you know, will you?"

Blair shook her head no and hugged him a little harder.

He slipped from the bed and retrieved her laptop, "I think Gossip Girl can tell this story better than I can."

They went through post after post about Chuck and Blair starting from their very beginning. Louis filled in pieces from the posts with details that Blair had once told him. With Gossip Girl's help, it was not difficult to paint a dark picture of her time with Chuck. She made it through more posts than he expected, but she made it nowhere near ones covering his recent growth.

Blair shut the laptop. Her father was right. She was so lucky to have Louis. What had her life become while she was with Chuck? The story with her and Jack and the Empire... Chuck and Jenny. It made her stomach lurch. What was she thinking? How could she ever let someone treat her like that- to use her, manipulate her! She wondered how she had even come to be in a car with Chuck, and was suddenly unsurprised that it had ended so badly.

She curled back up in Louis' arms, longing to feel safe, just as Serena popped her head in.

"The invalid is home!" The blonde bubbled.

"I'm hardly an invalid. I'm a princess-to-be. And my memory even in this condition is better than yours. You haven't forgotten about the fitting for your maid of honor dress on Monday, hmm?" Blair poked at her best friend.

"I didn't forget... I just haven't been thinking about Monday yet. It's been kind of a full week you know!" Serena confessed sheepishly.

"It's only going to get busier! Things are going well for my bachelorette party next Friday, aren't they?"

"It will be fine, don't worry! Just... focus on your fiancé!" Serena laughed, "I have to get to the hosp-"

Serena stopped from finishing the sentence. She just left it hanging in the air, everyone knew she was talking about Chuck. And they did not talk about Chuck. "I'll see you guys later!"

A week after the accident, Chuck was recovering. He was walking, but his leg had been crushed rather badly, though nothing had broken or fractured. His internal injuries would take several more weeks before he could bend and move with any level of comfort. One more week in the hospital, but at least a month of physical therapy.

Serena, Nate, and Dan took turns visiting. Nate was taking care of Monkey so his days were spent in recovery, and running Bass Industries from his bed. But at night, Chuck was still lonely, Blair's photo the only thing keeping him company.

He had no idea how he would get her back, so rather than torment himself with an uncertain future, he fell asleep at night thinking on their past. Mornings in bed with her, the games they played, the night Blair gave herself to him in the back of his limo, when he admitted he had feelings for her at her birthday, at his father's wedding. The day he told her, after everything, that he loved her. How he would always love her. I can't imagine the day I won't.

"I don't want to imagine a day that I don't love you, Blair." He murmured to the photo before he closed his eyes to sleep.

Blair was happily wrapped up in her wedding. She was too busy for distractions, sometimes a hazy little memory would bubble up, but they made no sense to her, they had no context, so she ignored them and kept moving forward. The piano in the living room never felt in focus to her. And she could no longer enjoy macrons from Ladurèe, they always gave her problems. The whole time, her wedding kept creeping closer and closer.

Serena, living with Blair, was their only access to her. Louis and Beatrice were always around, so Serena was left to try little things to shake lose Blair's buried memories. Eclairs, Chuck's favorite, for breakfast; Blair just looked at them oddly for a few moments, something clearly crossing her mind, before going on about how she's getting married, and oh, how could you, S?

Sneaking into Blair's closet, Serena pulled the dress from that night at Victrola out of storage and hung it in plain sight. She also borrowed one of Chuck's suit jackets, scented with his cologne. Wearing it, looking very retro 90s chic, she hugged her best friend tight. She felt Blair hug her back tightly, murmuring, "I like your coat- it smells really good."

"Yeah? I borrowed it from a friend, he has the best taste."

Beatrice was there, staring daggers at Serena.

Blair sounded a little lost, "It feels so... comforting... like I belong here?"

Serena let go of her friend, beaming, "Of course you belong here! I'm your best friend- I'm always available to give the best hugs."

She dashed off to class before Beatrice could corner her- her glare screaming bloody murder.

A few days before the wedding, Serena tried another antic. Scent worked well before, so she bought Chuck's favorite candle- Persian Lime from Bendel's, and took a nice long bath with it burning. Blair, grumpy that Serena had rolled into her allotted bath time, pounded on the door. Hastily she dried and dressed and whipped the door open. The look on Blair's face almost broke her heart.

Blair rubbed her head, like it ached, "What... is that?"

"I got a new candle at Bendel's, don't you like it?" Serena replied.

"I..." Blair's words stumbled, "I don't know?"

She pushed the bathroom door shut, "Yes, yes you do, Blair. Try."

Blair furrowed her brow, the scent was acute and she remembered warmth, large hands- not Louis' at all, holding her close, caressing her skin. His mouth, sensual but passionate and hungry, too. It pulled in her stomach and stung in her brain and she quietly cried out, "I don't, I don't know what it is!"

Serena hugged her friend, "I just," she sighed, "I just didn't want you to lose it."

Feeling as though she had failed, Serena pulled away and went to her room.

Blair drew her bath, relighting the candle, and curled up in the hot water and deep bubbles. Closing her eyes, she dreamed of those hands roving over her body and the sensation of his kisses. It was a dream- right?

Chuck had finally returned to The Empire. He sat on his sofa, glass of scotch in hand. He closed his eyes, and those moments before the crash... he had been so happy. The only times he had ever been happy were with Blair- because of Blair.

So he drank more. It numbed him, let him get through the days. Her wedding was on the horizon and he will have lost. If her memories had come back at all, she would have come to him... or Nate... or Serena. But nothing. That is what he was to her now. Nothing.

Blair was walking arm in arm with Serena into the first club for her bachelorette party. They were teenagers again, dancing and drinking like the world was all theirs. It was not long before they were drunk.

"I love you, B!" Serena shouted, "You're always there for me, no matter what!"

Serena hugged her friend, who giggled.

"Like, like when you... and Nate... and, and Chuck saved me from Georgie."

"Chuck..." Blair suddenly calmed down.

Serena sucked down another martini, "He tried to save you and the baby, you know."

Serena had completely lost her filter. Blair gaped at her best friend, unable to focus.

"In the car accident. You two... you realized Chuck was really what you had always wanted- all of him," The blonde tottered as she gushed all of him, then grew solemn, "When the car was crashing, he tried to protect you. It's why he got so badly injured, and you... less so. Didn't the doctors tell you?" Serena was too far-gone to understand the repercussions of what she was saying.

Blair suddenly could not breathe, the room was so crowded and hot. She pushed her way towards the wall and when she came to the windows in the front of the club, she stopped. Chuck. Chuck was watching her.

It was that same wounded expression he had when he was watching her in the Oak Room after graduation. But not just the Oak Room. His face, outside the Saints and Sinners party: You really believe that? I do. His face when they stood atop The Charles: How will I ever prepare for what you are planning? At Constance: I will always love you. When she tormented him at Sleep No More: Even the New Chuck Bass must still have some of his darkest desires. Just a taste?

Blair grabbed her head; what were all these images. They could not be dreams, they were too sharp, too real. Real. These were real! She gasped and looked back up. But he was gone.

Chuck fled. It had been so long since he had seen her, when Nate let slip where Serena was taking Blair... he could not help himself. But the look on her face, and when she grabbed her head like that. He was hurting her. He could not stand to hurt her! So he returned to The Empire, returned to his tumbler of scotch until he was consumed in the darkness when he passed out.

Serena shook him awake the next morning. "What did you do, Chuck?"

AN: Thanks again to my dear cococutie33 for polishing this up for me. For me, this story was never meant to be overly complex or detailed, just an exercise it getting my feelings out! Somehow it feels like cheating because I'm not being my usual crazy self with this short story, but the cliffhanger hurt and I had to do something about it ^_^ Coming up next? A big dose of happiness :D