Chapter 3- The Audition
Severus heard she was auditioning. The play was to be the event of the school year, if Madame Bouche were to be heeded. Most of the Slytherins felt it was a waste of time. Everyone knew that Shakespeare was a blood traitor after all, marrying a mudblood and selling his works among muggles, living as one of them. A few girls still liked the idea of auditioning and working with a famous actress. If they were dating, their boyfriends would go along with it.
"Julie is not playing opposite no Gryffindor," Jacob Duffner proclaimed when met with sneers from his dorm mates. It was only because Newman Grad—seventh year prefect and house favorite—was auditioning that this didn't become an all out war in Slytherin house.
Still, Severus didn't feel like justifying himself to the rest of his friends. Even if he didn't get in, he had to try. If he could get in the play with Lily, she would have to spend time with him. She would have to acknowledge him and perhaps that would lead to something more. The posters announced that the first cast meeting would be at Hogsmeade.
The whole affair played out in his head as he walked down to the auditorium that had been installed. He could have sworn this door used to lead to a broom closet. Now it was a mess of sheets over chairs that were bolted to the floor, lining a large expanse, which ended in a wooden floor that Snape figured must be the stage. He'd never actually seen a stage. He remembered Lily telling him all about a ballet she'd been two a few Christmases ago. She had described her excitement, her eyes going wide and beautiful, as they always did when she enjoyed something.
Snape stayed in the shadows, avoiding all the other students who were making exclamations about the floating spotlight and the blood red curtains.
James Potter walked in, staring at a paper in his hands, even as several girls waved to him. He muttered to himself.
Snape could feel his face fill with blood and fury. James Potter heard that Lily was auditioning and was joining in. He started to feel for his wand as the doors burst open. Madame Bouche sauntered in, a star struck Hufflepuff followed close behind, weighed down with bags and holding a clipboard. "Welcome, welcome to the theatre," she said. There was a mixture of polite clapping, enthusiastic applause, and mutterings.
Snape watched more students come in just behind Madame Bouche, Snape and Lily's friend Bethany were two of them. She giggled as Black grabbed her hand, dragging her down the aisle where Hero sat. He hated the whole lot of them. He couldn't wait until the day when their kind were gone. Obliterated.
There would just be him and Lily. Lily… where was she? Snape started to look around the room, scanning the rows of students. Where could she be?
"Hero," James whispered as Madame Bouche started on one of her lectures about the grandness of theatre. He was pretty sure he'd heard it a dozen times already. "Hero… where's Lily?"
Hero leaned forward and shook her head from side to side. She wasn't coming. Lily wasn't going to be here. And he'd worked so hard at memorizing his monologue!
Madame Bouche was now going through the audition list, calling up students one at a time. First a Ravenclaw, then a couple of Hufflepuffs, another Ravenclaw…
James sank into his chair. He might as well leave, all the good this would do.
Bethany and Sirius were sitting next to him, Bethany in Sirius's lap. "What's wrong, James," she asked. "Nervous?"
Sirius—who James figured didn't realize he was there until Bethany said something—looked over. "Scared Potter?"
"Come off it," James said, pushing forward and leaning on his knees.
"I was just playing with you, no reason to get all sulky," Sirius said.
James let out a groan. "I'm out of here."
"No wait," said Hero from his other side. She's moved over when the couple from Hufflepuff went on stage. "You can't just leave now."
"But Lily isn't even doing the bloody show," he said. "What a waste—"
"That's not the point," Bethany said. "The point is that you're in it."
James looked at her, his interest piqued. "It is?"
"Of course it is," Hero and Bethany said simultaneously.
James looked between the two of them. "Why?"
Hero rolled her eyes and let out a sigh. "You're in a play. Lily loves this sort of thing. Even if she's not in it, she'll come to watch. She'll need to cheer for someone."
"But Remus will probably get the lead, not me."
"Mate, do you see him here?"
James looked around. He hadn't even noticed. Peter—to no one's surprise—wasn't auditioning, but this was the sort of thing Remus lived for. Was it too much to ask for not having that competition?
"He'll be going home for Christmas early," Bethany said, looking at Sirius. "Isn't that what he said?"
"Uh, yeah," Sirius thought then looked back to James. "Come on. You can't leave me here all by my lonesome."
"What about me?" Bethany protested, and the two of them were back in their own little world.
"Stick it out, James," Hero said, then sat back, applauding who ever had finished.
James joined in, taking a deep breath. After three more auditions (two from first years who Sirius swore may have wet themselves), a fifth year boy from Ravenclaw did a great job, followed by a Ravenclaw and then Sirius and Bethany and at last, James was up.
He left the paper at his chair, his mind trying to remember exactly how he saw the words on the page. Benedict's monologue. He tried to use the suggestions Remus had given him, and had a moment of guilt on stage. Remus would have loved to do this. Remus ate stuff like this up. Instead he'd helped James get ready to audition knowing he wouldn't have the chance. '...I...I--" He realized all that thinking and he couldn't remember where he was in the speech. Everyone was staring, waiting. A couple girls in the audience whispered to one another as James swallowed.
The door in the back creaked open. Someone stepped into the room, the click of heels said that it was a girl and the glint of light on bright red hair indicated it must be Lily. James took a deep breath. "I do spy some marks of love in her," he caught the phrase, did another glance around the room and finished his monologue.
As he came down the steps, there was a round of applause, a few cat calls from Sirius and a glare from Snape, who was now standing in the far right aisle, the faint light in the room catching on his large nose. But Lily was here, so he continued back to his seat.
"Brillant Potter," Sirius said. "Really saved yourself there."
"Yeah, thanks," he said, feeling like two strings were forcing the corners of his mouth up. He couldn't stop smiling if he'd tried. Lily was here. Lily had come. She must have been running late to auditions.
Lily had promised Hero she would be there to watch. It wasn't fair, since Hero and Bethany had ganged up on her, trying to guilt her into it. It worked. She'd watched the clock as Slugclub went late that afternoon. She wasn't sure about protocol for auditions, but there was no one at the doors, so she tried to quietly slip in the door. The theatre had little light. She felt her way into the closest chair, sitting behind everyone else.
James was on stage. He seemed to be lost for a moment, looking around for someone, something to give him a cue. Like a deer in the headlights. He's worried, she thought. Though it was far away, she could tell his shoulders were a little more stooped than his normally confident, defiant stance. He looked more real to Lily in that moment than she thought she'd ever seen him before then. Less planned.
For a moment his eyes travelled to where she sat. Looking right at her. Lily blushed before realizing that was rediculous. For one this was James Potter. Other girls may be taken in by his coy, arrogent smile, but she was beyond that. Second, there was no way he could see her from stage. There was little light where she sat. It was all focused on those presenting their monologues. She looked down at the books in her hand while James finally caught up and continued. She let out a breath she'd been holding.
Stupid, she thought to herself. It would serve James Potter right to have a moment of embarrassment. Heaven knows he had provided plenty of embarrassing experiences for others.
She continued to wait, watching one person after another go up on stage. Some shook visibly, others stumbled over their words, while others looked like they were born to act. Hero was one of these. She did beautifully, reading the lines with such emotion that everyone in the room went silent. Lily hoped Bethany had done close to as well, though she didn't know that Bethany could pull something like that off. Sirius and Bethany had practiced in the commons earlier, and while they did well, it was nothing compared to this.
Everyone cheered for Hero as she came off the stage. Lily clapped hard and laughed as Sirius, James and Henry Groud picked her up and tossed her into the air a couple times.
"Please, please, let's have some order," Madame Bouche shouted over the rowdy crowd. Hero was set down and returned to her seat.
Not to be outdone, the Ravenclaws tried to make an ordeal of their fellow classmate, who went next, and the Hufflepuffs whistled loudly for Helen Bower, although she stuttered through half the monologue.
"Severus Snape," Madame Bouche announced. There was a decent amount of applause from the Slytherins, but some laughter coming from around James and Sirius.
Lily looked over at them. "Can you believe it," Sirius said, making a show of rolling in his chair, slapping Bethany's knee (since he couldn't reach his own with her sitting there) and then nudged James. "Hey look... Snivilus must be auditioning for the role of the jackass." Laughter from other students followed.
A couple Gryffindor students laughed, but James seemed to be staying put. That wasn't like him. Lily leaned forward in her chair. She really shouldn't stay. She needed to get through at least half a scroll for her potions essay tonight. Not to mention she wanted to get onto some extra research at the library on healing.
It was like a curse as Snape started. She couldn't move for want to support and yet she wanted to leave. To escape anything to do with Severus.
He started out just fine. A piece from Tempest if she remembered correctly. He wasn't spectacular, but better than some who had come out.
Sirius could be heard throughout, guffawing or making side comments. Between some lines, Severus glared towards them. The hate seemed to seep from his eyes. He looked almost frightening. It made Lily shutter to think that her friend could have altered so much in so short a time. She knew he never liked James and Sirius--or most Gryffindors for that matter-- but he'd never looked at anyone like that. Like a simple thought could destroy them where they stood.
Sirius was nudging James. "Look, look at how his hair shimmers. Extra greasy tonight."
James shrugged his friend's arm. "Knock it off," he said.
Lily looked back to Severus. The initial stance had changed to one of getting through something awful. He wasn't acting anymore, but instead making a recitation. He finished and received a polite applause from everyone except the Gryffindors-- some of who were still mocking Severus as he came down the steps. James and Sirius weren't among them. They seemed to be in some sort of argument. For a fleeting moment, Lily's heart lifted. Maybe James was sticking up for Severus.
What a stupid thought.
She'd stayed far too long already. Before the applause died down, Lily stood, left and made her way over to the library.
"It was probably all in your head," Remus said as he walked along side James and Sirius before dinner.
"Probably all in your head, Prongs," Sirius added, with toss of a rock into the lake. He was still angry for being told off. "You know, imagining things. Only way to explain your mental reaction toward the greasy git." He threw another rock.
Remus ignored him. "I don't like him any more than you do," James protested. "That doesn't mean we have to act like apes every time we see him." Or Lily sees us, he added in his mind. He still hadn't told them the part of Lily's deal to not make fun of Snape. It had been too much to ask, he was sure. Did she not see how awful the hooked nose sleeze was to almost every Gryffindor? He sneered as he passed any of them. Didn't she notice?
"Hey, hey!"
All three of them turned to see Nigel, dragging his broom along as he ran towards them. He'd become a sort of Marauder protege. He tagged along in the commons and Sirius had taken a real liking to him. James imagined Nigel was more like the little brother Sirius wished he had. A little minion, to go around and do his bidding.
"Snivillus at three o'clock," he whispered as he came close enough to be heard. Sirius whipped his head around and James looked over. Sure enough, Snape was sulking, leaning up against the trunk of a tree.
"Good work Nigel," Sirius said, ruffling his hair a bit. "We'll make a marauder of you yet."
Sirius started over towards him. "Come on, Padfoot," James said, catching up to him. "Let's just go play some Quidditch."
Sirius didn't even glance back. "Why hello, Snivillus," Sirius said. Nigel was following close behind him.
"You," James said, grabbing his arm, "stay back. Sirius--"
"Nice try at acting today." Sirius jerked his arm out of James' grasp. "Who taught you such skill? Your dear da?"
Save a tensing in his jaw, Snape remained impassive, looking to the right, following the edge of the lake. James followed the direction of his eyes. Sitting just on the nearby bank, out in the sun with a stack of books nearby was Lily, her hair pulled into a ponytail on the side. James got a sinking feeling, then a sudden urge to curse Snape into oblivion. He had no right to stand there looking at Lily like that.
"Sirius, let's get going," Remus said, though he was still standing back. Sirius glanced towards Lily, then back to Snape.
Sirius got closer to Snape's ear. "What makes you think someone like Lily would ever want to come near a git like you?"
"Sirius!" Remus said.
"Oh how noble," Snape said in a slow, bored sneer. "Don't bother to pretend you care, Lupin. Dumbledore isn't even around to reward the effort."
Sirius pulled his wand.
"Stop," James said, giving Sirius a shove back from Snape. Snape still didn't move, though he faced the two of them now.
Other students were shouting now, the word duel rang across the lawn.
"Sirius, don't do this," James said. "Let's just go inside."
Sirius had a smirk on his face as he backed up. He turned around.
"It must be nice to have someone pretend to be family, after being blasted from your own."
James could feel Sirius stop. "Just leave it," he whispered. Sirius wasn't in the mood to listen today.
"Better to leave it all behind than to sit in the shadow of others, hoping she'll notice you," Sirius said, turning around. Snape had gone more pale than usual. James noticed his eyes flicker to where Lily was. "She never did like you, you know. How does it feel to be pitied? To know that's the most you'll get from her... pity."
Snape screamed and sent a red blast of light their way. James jumped back while Sirius rebounded it. The curse hit the tree Snape had stood next to moments before. The wood cracked as more students came around to watch.
"Both of you stop this," Remus said, taking out his wand.
"Say out of it, Lupin," Snape sneered. "I'm a prefect too. How about a detention for Sirius and Potter here."
About five Gryffindors made shouts of protests at once, most lost amid the general noise of the crowd. Sirius rebuttled with a hex, which Snape dodged by inches. Spells started flying, James trying to pull Sirius out of the fray, just to have him push James back and continue to cast another jinx or hex.
"Stop it!" Remus tried to yell over the crowd, but continued to be drowned out.
"I better be careful, or I might do what your brother is aching to do for himself," Snape shouted, just as James had Sirius distracted.
This time James didn't wait for Sirius to respond, he sent a curse himself. A flash of gold flung itself towards Snape, which he returned straight back. Sirius ducked to the right while James dodged the other way. Students moved quickly until finally one couldn't move quickly enough. Nigel, who had been in the midst of the crowd, was hit square in the chest.
He fell to the ground, sprawled out and pale. James looked back at Snape who was already stepping away. Sirius looked shocked and everyone else turned into a sea of chaos.
James was the first of the three to move towards Nigel. He looked awful: ghastly pale and with every muscle twitching.
"Nigel," James said his name, falling down next to him, grabbing his arm like it could make it stop moving so much. "Nigel!"
Remus was now at Nigel's head, holding it and Sirius was at his feet. Another person was coming forward. James looked up and Lily was at Nigel's other side, looking determined as she held her wand out, following the length of Nigel's torso, then his legs muttering under her breath. Up one side and then the other.
Nigel's body slowly relented, going limp instead of twitching until it stopped all together. "Get him to the hospital wing," Lily instructed.
All three of them lifted Nigel quickly, finding a balance in holding him up as Lily led the way, shouting at people who were getting in the way gawking. She threw open the doors with a wave of her wand and they continued up the stairs. James felt sick as he caught a look at Nigel while adjusting his grasp. He'd done this. Nigel was just doing as they asked and he'd come out the worst in it all.
Nurse Truman ordered them out immediately. Lily turned, too sick to look at any of them. Right now she just wanted to go hide away in the library. Find a corner no one knew about and hide. She'd leave her books on the lawn until the morning.
"Lily," James called after her. "Lily, wait a minute."
She walked faster. "Why, so you can ask me out again? Now's not exactly a good time for that."
"No, wait," James said, cutting her off in her tracks. "No, that was amazing. How did you know what to do?"
"I read, James," she snapped. "You know, something besides hexes and miserable good for nothing spells that--"
"Oh yes, how easily you neglect to see Snivillus doing the same thing."
Lily rolled her eyes and stepped past him, walking again towards the library. "What I fail to comprehend is how he has anything to do with what you choose."
"And I'm supposed to just sit there while he insults my friends?"
"You're supposed to stay away! The whole lot of you hover around each other picking fights. You're no better than Severus!" Lily turned around to face him. James stopped in surprise. "You-- you good for nothing, cowardly sheep of a human being! You are a slimy toe rag that masquerades as some god send to the world. You know where it's going to get you?" She pointed down the hall towards the hospital wing. "Hurting those who idolize you for no descent-- "
"Miss Evans," a voice echoed down the corridor.
Lily stopped, turning to the end of the hall where Madame Bouche stood with acouple students Lily recognized from the auditions. She swallowed. How loud had she been? Anger turned to embarrassment and back into fury at James for ever putting her in this situation to begin with.
"Miss Evans," Madame Bouche said again. "Please follow me."
With one last glare at James, Lily followed the professor, hoping she only had a chance to land James and Sirius in a month of detentions with her.
A/N: I'm alive!!! Sorry everyone for leaving you hanging for like... ever. School got the best of me, but I'll keep my promise of updating quickly with ten reviews. I'm going to have to extend that promise to within two weeks, but I will find time if you just find a moment to review :)