Disclaimer: I don't own Jack Sparrow or any of its characters. The Pirates of the Caribbean movie is the property of Disney. So there is no copyright infringement intended, nor do I intend to tick anyone off – so please don't sue me, I'm poor enough already! But I do own the story itself and the characters of Jess and non-POtC types…. :O)

This is my first Pirates fanfic. It is based on the 2003 movie and my own (twisted) imagination! I do not intend to rip off any other writer (I just can't wade through so many pages of stories to check, I'd lose the will to live!) so if this premise has been done before I'm sorry, I just hope mine is different enough for it not to be too boring. But if I digress from the history of the original movie and stuff a little, don't shoot me as I'm old and the brain (what little I have) is not what it used to be. Plus I might also change things to fit the story a little better –sorry. But that is what artistic license is all about! LOL

I watched the film recently; and wondered if I could do my own story – where this time Jack gets the girl (not Elizabeth for all the Will/Elizabeth shippers out there)!.

So here it is, it's set after the original movie – it's going to be reasonably dramatic, romantic and humorous (I hope!)….. It is nothing but fluff, so if you don't like this sort of stuff please don't read it! If you've read any of my other stuff and liked it, hopefully you'll like this too.

June Birdie: Yeah, Little Bit HATES dresses (much like my own daughter!) and Elizabeth should know better! Of course Jack laughing didn't help – ah yes his feelings, well they get stretched in this chapter, how long will he last before he admits the truth? I love it when the love is all passionate but not admitted:O) Yeah that last part about the rum was one of my favourites as Jack and rum are just so linked!

Calliann: Ah the falling – yeah she did that, hence the hate of dresses! Knew you'd love the bit with the swearing especially as it involved our favourite word! ;O) Of course me Grand-da wasn't a pirate; but only because they didn't have them then – but he was a major scally and I loved him to bits! There was a lot of Jack Sparrow in him I reckon and I think that's why I like the character so much; my grand-da was just soooooo much bloody fun and he ALWAYS had a tall story tell me. I honestly miss him so much, more as I get older as I realise Beth will never have a larger than life character like that to remember; though I try to be as weird and mad as I can be for her! O h I had to bring the 'captain' bit in as I felt so sorry for him at the end when he muttered it so sadly when they were reading out his crimes (loved the cheeky grin at executioner to about the clergyman in England!) Yeah I loved the blood in the shirt line too – though my fave had to be the last one about 'look for the rum…' No Norrington will try very hard but he will not get her – he is INCREDIBLY boring….I thought Arthur was bad, but dear GOD the man would only have to say Hello and I'd be asleep! No a character like Jess needs someone like Jack. Her speech is my view on love and marriage – old fashioned maybe (I have friends who've married for money and stuff) but it's just my take on it. Yes he does, but he's sorry for it….yes they do….but…….. ;O) There's more about her past in the next chapter, but in the form of a story…hope you like this one sis! Yeah, it seems to be collecting readers. YAY!

LANCELOTTRISTANBABY: Thanks for reading it and hope you like this chapter too!

NOTE: If anyone wants to know a site for the script; e-mail me as I have one bookmarked now.

WARNING: BAD LANGUAGE AND VIOLENCE, SO READ AT YOUR OWN PERIL.

All reviews, and constructive criticism, gratefully received – but no flaming please; and I will try to update regularly.

'—' signifies thoughts.

"—" signifies speech.

So here's Chapter Three!

-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-

THE LADY PIRATE

Chapter Three – Married

Three days later the land sickness, as Jess called it, got too much for her; and she retreated back to the Pearl - instantly at home on the gently rocking ship.

The others were well used to her little idiosyncrasy with land; she genuinely disliked it after more than a few days. Annamarie stayed on board with her and Little Bit the next 2 nights, and they swapped many stories and a stronger friendship was forged.

Annie felt like she had finally found a replacement for the sister Barbossa had killed, and Jess felt she found someone she could call blood once more.

Then Jack returned as he said he'd 'missed his Pearl'; but it was obvious from the genuine smile he flashed Jess, and the way he swung Little Bit up into his arms and called her horrible names, that it was as much them as the ship that had tugged him back.

"Shall we get on then Little Bit eh?" he looked at Jess "You gonna bring me that horizon then?" she looked surprised and then grinned.

"Yeah – let's go see where it takes us! For I'm that sick of bloody land – in a lot of ways!" once word was sent to the rest of the crew they were finally back on their way.

Commodore James Norrington had never been so glad to see the Pearl sail away before in his life; his telescope showing it's black sails billowing, and a red-headed woman in the crow's nest pointing to the horizon and shouting down to Jack Sparrow. They were indeed going to be out of the way before her parents came, assuming they did.

0-0-0-0-0

Unfortunately 4 months later the Pearl was back – they were along that way and needed supplies, and so decided to stop there and get some and see Elizabeth and Will at the same time "Better be legal here mates!" Jack said "Don't want to be upsetting Elizabeth do we? That bloody woman could nag a saint to murder!"

So it was that Jess and Annamarie were on watch when the older woman saw a boat approaching with a middle aged couple in it, along with the commodore, the Governor and Elizabeth and Will. She leapt to her feet "What the!" she got Jack's spyglass and stared "SHIT, FUCK,BOLLOCKS – OH SHIT, FUCK, BOLLOCKS!" She ran to Annamarie "Okay listen to me, tell Jack goodbye and say….say….I'm sorry."

"Woah! What the hell is happening here?" the woman asked staring through the spyglass "it's just some old people…why they got your undies in a knot? Oh." She turned to Jess, having been filled in on her background by the other woman "they yer ma and da?"

"Aye and now I gots to go – Little Bit? C'mon we're going on a trip…."

"Aye, and where might that be? Are we thinking of mutiny Miss Simmonds!" Jack raised an eyebrow having got on from the other side. He soon stopped at the look of abject panic on her face - Jack could see something was wrong; very wrong.

"She wants to leave us!" Annie barked at him "Make her stay!"

Ragetti and Pintel looked devastated, but not as much as Jack – as the other two tried to beg her to tell them why; he stepped forward grabbed her arm viciously, his eyes dark and growled in her ear "we not good enough for ye, now yer some grand lady? Was it all talk that night in the drawin' room then?"

She yanked free "You were there!" Jack immediately realised his mistake.

"Not me we're here to talk about though is it, pet? It's you…." he went back to his usual madman thing. She blinked as if she'd missed something important.

"Well, as you were there I don't have to tell you do I? They're 'ere, me parents, and they'll fetch me back! They ain't come for no social call – I bet they got some bloke they want me to marry and that's that!" Tears threatened ,and Ragetti went over to her.

"'Ere, 'ere! Now don't be getting' upset Jess! We'll kill 'em – simple, job done; Bob's yer uncle and Fanny's yer aunt we're back to normal!" he grinned hopefully at her; they'd never seen her upset before.

She had to chuckle at the daft crewman, she hugged him suddenly "you're a good mate Ragetti, you are…..don't you let no one tell you different!"

"If she weren't so upset, I'd be right 'appy now." The young man sighed to no one in particular.

"I got to pack and be gone before they get….." too late they were there.

"Savvy darling….my God you look like a little savage!" everyone on board took an immediate dislike to Mrs Fitzwilliam "Still no matter, when we get you back to dry land and washed and dressed like normal people I'm sure you won't be so ugly." She eyed the pirates around them "did I tell you you're getting married? Of course not, how silly of me!" she tittered like an idiot and Jess closed her eyes as if in pain.

"Well, you are – the 4th Duke of Northumberland. Very influential at Court, has the King's ear." Her father beamed at her "Of course you will agree. I mean I know he's a little older than you."

"I 'eard of him - he's 65 and I'm 30 years his junior; and Northumberland's landlocked Da! There's no sea!" Jess was horrified.

"I am father…not Da, and you will do as you are told! Too long have we put up with this ridiculous nonsense child! Of course there's no sea – do you think we want you running away from us again!

You will marry this man Savannah, and we will do something about the….child" he pointed to Little Bit "the Duke is unsure if he is willing to bring up another man's child, particularly when that man was a pirate. But I suppose with a bit of work we could take her and make her into the lady you never were – she's certainly prettier than you."

Jack saw the look of indescribable pain on Jess' face; he squashed down the anger and stepped forward kissing her deeply "alright pet? Who do we have here then?"

"Please may I introduce my parents Lord and Lady Henry Fizwilliam of Portland, West Sussex." Jess intoned, obviously in a state of shock; but she was a quick witted woman and immediately picked up the thread of what he was doing – just how far he was willing to go was the test. But she'd play along, if only to make their lives difficult; and she'd fight them every step of the way…..

But before she could go on Jack butted in "'Owdo mates – Jack Sparrow, captain of the Black Pearl………. and her husband." The look on her parents' faces was priceless; Jess was struggling to keep everything passive about her own as were the rest of the crew who had started to drift aboard – word had spread quick that Jess was in some sort of trouble and there weren't a man, or woman in Annie's case, that wouldn't go to the gallows for her and, more importantly, their Little Bit.

They knew that if they didn't pull off whatever plan Jack had going on in his rum addled brain, then Jess and Little Bit would be shipped off to England to marry some old goat and never see the sea, or them again.

Elizabeth grinned seeing what he was up to and drew her father to one side to talk; she could see he disliked these people full as much as everyone else, and when she outlined her plan he was in full agreement. "I like the girl Elizabeth and if I were but a few years younger I would have done the same as Mr Sparrow –the man they wish her to marry is older than I!"

She hugged him "thank you Father, I knew I could count on you – both sets of paper yes?"

"Yes and in the hour."

"Where is the paperwork if you are married and what of the child?"

Jess finally bridled "the child has a name…Maggie."

Little Bit went to stick her 2 pen'neth in, but Ragetti clapped a hand over her mouth "Don't, Little Bit" he whispered "they're out for trouble, yeah? Let yer Ma and Jack 'andle it." She nodded reluctantly.

"I am holding the papers of the marriage…" The Governor offered.

"Aye, and adoption…" Jack piped up "I adopted her, didn't I luv?" he tightened his grip on Jess who looked ready to pass out, but was giving it all she had and he was proud of her.

They were not going to win, Jess knew she could fight them better this time – she had good friends now, she could see that by the way they were all rallying round; Jack making the biggest sacrifice "Yeah, Jack's Maggie's Da now."

Jack patted her stomach "as well as this little one's – it'll be nice for Li…Maggie to have a little brother or sister don't ye think?" He grinned impishly at her parents.

Her mother fainted.

0-0-0-0-0

Jack slammed the door behind him in his cabin "Right! You're Ma's still recovering and we're married, pet! Governor's just dropped off the papers, luverly bit of forgery – man missed 'is bloody calling I reckon. I am now also Little Bit's Da – I told her whilst those bloody monsters are 'ere she must call me that too, like it's been for a while; she thinks….."

He stopped dead, Jess was stood by the window staring out over the sea, it was sunset and the evening sun was streaming in over her and making her glow almost gold, and she fair near took his breath away.

"Really? Thanks Jack….Thanks so much, ye don't know what ye done for me!" She hurried over and hugged him tightly.

"To all intents and purposes we're married luv – let's see yer parents muck this around!" he grinned at her impishly.

She smiled; however Jack could see her heart wasn't in it "What's matter? Aren't I good enough?" he wiggled his eyebrows at her, but did feel hurt that she might think he wasn't a major catch.

She hugged him once more and kissed his cheek "Jack ye are, course ye are mate! I know a ton of women who'd snap their own arms off to have ye, me included o'course! But they ain't never goin' to buy it! They ain't stupid…."

He settled, realising she was just worried about them making more trouble "Look we got the papers and we got this…" he patted her stomach, and grinned "She didn't 'alf hit the deck, yer ma!"

Jess giggled "she did, didn't she? I don't know how I didn't bust a gut laughing!"

"Commodor wants to see ye…" Jack jumped in "Wants to say sorry."

"Too late for that – damage is done. I spoke to him that night we was at Elizabeth's and Will's, I told what my life would be like if they came back and he still sent for them." She was hurt at the betrayal from a man she thought was honourable and a friend.

"I think he done it before he came round….he says he did. I think from what ye told him there's no way he would've sent for them after that."

"Why was ye there? Ye know I can take care of meself Jack!" it irritated her that he felt he had to rescue her – though this time she was more grateful than she could ever say for his madcap bloody ideas.

"I thought he might be up to something, and you might need an extra pair of hands to strangle him so I snuck in…." Jack was unrepentant, and grinned at her.

Jess sighed, she could never bloody stay angry at this man and he knew it "Send him in…."

"I done the business mate – the rest is up to you….but no flirting; she's me wife, the mother of me adopted daughter and pregnant with me baby, savvy?" He smirked to the other man as he left.

Norrington rolled his eyes as he stepped in and closed the door; only Sparrow could up with such a harebrained scheme - what surprised him was the way everyone, even the Governor and himself, were going along with it. He turned to speak to Jess; only to meet a fist connecting with his chin, and then blackness.

0-0-0-0-0

When he came round a few minutes later, he found Jack and the others hovering over him and a brooding Jess sat on Jack's bed glaring at him. "You were very lucky James that Jack happened to decide to come back in when he did, or else I think she may have killed you." Elizabeth smirked.

"Deservedly so in this case Commodore I have to say…" the Governor interjected with a smile at Jess "Obeying our duty is one thing; playing God is entirely another."

"My parents?" Her temper cooling she suddenly realised if they'd witnessed this they were sunk; although she may well be able to argue that she'd hit him because he brought them to her – her parents were well aware there was no love lost between them.

"Quite alright my dear, still in your cabin; Gibbs is keeping an eye on them…"

She nodded, drew her knees up under her chin and continued to stare balefully at Norrington as he got unsteadily to his feet. He realised she had not been lying about the punch of a woman; he wiggled his jaw to make sure it wasn't broken and he still had all his teeth.

Both Annie and Jack smirked – the former for being able to dole out the same; and the latter for having been on the receiving end of Jess' fists himself, when she first came aboard and she'd realised he'd killed Barbossa and robbed her of her revenge. It'd taken over a week for that black eye to go down….

"I am genuinely sorry for all the trouble I have caused you Miss Simmonds. It was certainly not my intent; and had I known prior to my visit that evening what I subsequently learnt there, I would not have sent the note you have my assurances on that.

Unfortunately it was done and sent before I arrived at Elizabeth's, and I could not get it back."

She nodded "the damage is done; I've had me say and that's that. But…." She stood and stalked over to him, her blue eyes glittering to the point where he had to force himself not to step back "yer going to help us make sure they believe utterly what we been telling 'em about me and Jack, savvy?"

He nodded "yes of course…."

"Good." She went and sat down again next to Jack who'd gone and sat on his bed "because I'm not sure how much of this they'll believe otherwise. I don't wanna go with them, I don't want to lose Maggie.." She dropped her head onto her knees and looked at the floor.

A finger tilted her chin up and she found herself staring into resolute chocolate eyes lined by kohl "they ain't taking you or our Little Bit, coz we won't let them." He spoke slowly and resolutely "The entire bloody crew'd fight 'em before we let that happen."

"They'd try though – they would." She sighed "'Ark at me, bloody Glory O'Reilly; scourge o' the seven seas…." Her voice trying to be bright, tailed off and she looked at them "they always made me feel so bloody worthless!"

Jack didn't think, he pulled her into a hug and looked at the crew who were crowding his cabin "well, ye ain't luv - not to us, is she mates?"

There were calls of 'nay!' and Cotton's parrot muttered 'pieces of eight' which Annie said meant she was worth her weight in gold and Cotton slapped her on the back.

Jack made her look at him again "We'll make it work pet, they ain't dealt with captain Jack Sparrow before have they, savvy!"

She smiled and shook her head "I'm goin' up….stay out of their way 'till they gone."

"Alright Luv…." They all followed her back on deck.

"Where's up?" Elizabeth asked; Jack merely pointed upwards with his finger and as she raised her head she saw Jess heading to the crow's nest.

"We all goes up there to think." Jack added.

"Yeah, even me." Said Little Bit going over to Jack and hugging his waist "What they going to do to me?"

"Nothin' - they won't take you from us Little Bit. We won't let 'em."

"If they get papers, you won't stop' em." She sighed sadly "Papers is always important…"

Jack stooped and picked her up as Ragetti came over with Pintel "Well we got papers too, we got papers that say yer mine that I adopted ye all right and legal like, and if they still want trouble we ups anchor and skedaddles, savvy?" she nodded and hugged him, burying her head in his neck.

"Yeah!" mumbled Ragetti coming over to put a hand on her shoulder "they ain't takin' me little maid! She's like a little sister to me, she is!" he glowered "an' they say us pirates are a bad lot – I've never stolen anyone's kids!" he tilted his head "not a lot of gold in kids course, but still…..I ain't!"

Elizabeth looked "she should be here Jack, don't give them any gunpowder eh?" she went to gesture to Jess to come down.

"S'alright I'll go up" he smiled "It'll look very romantic when they come out and see me and her up there, tip me a wink and I'll kiss her! Little Bit go play with Ragetti yeah? Don't forget to call me Da from now on, savvy?" the little girl nodded with a grin and went and hugged the young pirate and before sitting with him and Pintel.

Ragetti stroked her head as she sat down with them "Little Bit? Little Bit we won't let them take ye, we promise, yeah?" she nodded again. The young man hugged her muttering "I'd hang before I let 'em have ye! Bring ye up like some noncy bloody lady!"

0-0-0-0-0

Jack appeared next to Jess in the crows nest; she sighed "I love it up here…"

"Aye it's nice…."he glanced round "bit cramped though – couldn't have a party up here; people falling over the railing, getting killed….not good." He shook his head and wrinkled his nose.

She looked at him "you don't have to do this Jack, I could just go."

"Nah, if I let that happen they'd mutiny again, and I'm getting' mightly sick of ending up on that bloody island." He rolled his eyes "We should call it mutineer's island, or…." He caste about for another name.

"Or Cap'n Jack's Island has a better ring to it." she grinned.

"See I can make ye smile."

"Ye always do Jack, ye always do…"

He glanced down and saw her parents coming out of the cabin and looking up "Oh, we're on pet…c'mere and gissa kiss!" he leant in and said, as he his lips hovered just above hers "I could get used to this…" before kissing her deeply.

He rested one hand on her neck to steady her and the other protectively on her stomach. Her arms were up and round his neck before he could blink and she was kissing him back fervently.

Elizabeth had to get Will to hug her to stop herself doing a happy dance at what she saw – she felt in a way the Fitzwilliam's arrival might be doing both Jack and Jess a favour, as they were being forced to show love and affection to each other to keep the charade going.

But she was convinced that the charade would not last long before their true feelings took over. After all, Jack would not have chosen this way to defend her lightly and Jess would not have accepted the help so easily if they didn't care.

She looked up as Jess' parents went to get into the boat – disgust at the display of affection written all over their faces. She glanced at Annie and both women grinned, as did the rest of the crew as they all looked skyward. All knew the couple and all knew that kiss was not an act – even the legendary pirates Glory O'Reilly and Captain Jack Sparrow couldn't act that well.

Up in the crow's nest they finally broke apart to find her parents long gone.. "Just as well we can't make babies by kissin' eh luv; that was definitely a baby maker if we could!" he grinned.

She laughed out loud "Captain Jack Sparrow – you say the funniest things!"

"Only to you pet, only to you – no other bugger finds me funny at all!" he chuckled.

When they got down to the deck a short while later, Elizabeth informed them they were to stay with her and Will.

Jess put her foot down "I ain't doing it! She wants to spy on me fine, let them bloody do it here!"

"Wherever we stay pet it means the same bedroom, right Elizabeth?"

"Yes it does……"

"Then we stay with you and Will." Jess went to protest "''ear me out luv, hear me out…they thinks you're pregnant right? You get sick on land – really sick; I don't s'pose they know that?"

she shook her head "No, it started about 10 years ago – I go ashore so little that I found if I stayed on land too long now I get sick like others get seasick, s'why I call it landsick."

"They they'll think it's mornin' sickness savvy?" he was weaving about and waving his arms as usual and she had to laugh "what?"

"You….just you.." she smiled "yeah I savvy Jack. But it's not just the morning's it's all day every day until I get back on the sea."

"I can vouch for the fact that whoever said it was morning sickness lied Jess. I'm sure you can too when you had Little Bit?"

"Aye, that's true enough. But what if they stay a long time? I should start showing at some point and I'm not pregnant."

"well, I could rectify that quick enough…." Three female hands all hit him "Ah, not sure I deserved that – but I'll allow it." He shook his head. "Just joking with ye pet, just a little joke!" he grinned at Jess who, once again couldn't stay mad, and shook her head.

"In your dreams Jack…." She smiled.

"Yeah, at least 4 times a night so far…." He letched at her; and though Elizabeth looked scandalised Jess roared with laughter.

"well, enjoy that then – coz that's all you're getting mate!" she looked at the other two "but how to sort it without resorting to Jack's….offer?" she dipped her head to him and smiled.

"A cushion, then we borrows a baby from the town." Jack put in.

"It just might work…." Elizabeth offered.

"One of yours Jack?" Jess quirked an eyebrow.

He rubbed his chin thoughtfully "could be, could be…." He mused, then laughed "doubt it though – I'm always…..careful…savvy? World couldn't stand more than one Captain Jack Sparrow at a time…"

She rolled her eyes "got that right!"

"Or…." Will hesitated in what he was saying "you could let it go so far and then say you lost it. I know it's a horrible thing to say…" he added quickly "but it would save having to produce a baby and it does happen a lot. I mean Elizabeth and I were incredibly fortunate with Adam." He thought of his little boy with a smile, now with his grandfather whilst they tried to sort this out.

She nodded "I'd hate to say that Will, but it's an option that's for sure."

"Oh, that reminds me…." Elizabeth suddenly remembered "You're parents are having a ball in a week's time to celebrate, allegedly, your marriage and pregnancy. I don't believe it of course, I think they are hoping to either try and make you see what you could have or are planning something – maybe to confront you.

Anyway, you are to go and be dressed as a lady" she looked at Jess "but I would advise you to take as many of your friends as you can – there is always safety in numbers Jess."

"Like I'd go without my mates and my 'husband'!" the older woman laughed.

0-0-0-0-0-0

A little later Gibbs approached her "Jess we want to come with you to this ball, we do….but…there's a problem."

"What's that?"

"We can't dance…"

"None of ye?" she looked around the slowly assembling crew.

"No…"

"We got a long week ahead of us then mates!" she grinned "Coz I'm gonna have you dancing like kings by Saturday night!"

Jess was going to regret that statement very quickly……