What she did on her own was this: get dressed in the clothes she found in the closet (they were not her own, although they fit her perfectly), eat the breakfast a trembling house elf brought after Lucius had left, stare in the mirror for 20 minutes and will herself not to cry, and then wander around the big house that she had played in all that time ago. It was mostly the same she found, although some changes to the décor had been made. She didn't open the door she knew to be Draco's, but she peered into the library, the many guest rooms, and finally, the sitting room. This is where she remembered Narcissa sitting whenever she had come over, knitting or reading or playing the piano. Felicity had always admired Narcissa, even more than her own mother, who was saccharine and gaudy where Narcissa was soft-spoken and simply beautiful. Her parents hadn't ever had the same quiet love she saw between Lucius and Narcissa. For a moment, she hurt for Lucius, losing his wife, until she remembered the pain of the night before. Sympathies towards him, she decided, must end there.

There was another wing of the house she didn't know as well. That was where the big dining room was, the ballroom, the larger kitchen. It wasn't for family life, and it wasn't for her. She knew that Voldemort spent much of his time there, and that was where all the meetings with him were to be. She also knew that other Death Eaters stayed there, and that the house elves lived there too. All in all, it was best avoided.

At lunchtime, she didn't know what to do. She couldn't believe she was hungry at all, but her appetite had been good, given the circumstances. Felicity wandered into the kitchen, and stopped in her tracks when she saw Draco standing over the sink eating a sandwich. She opened her mouth but had no idea what to say, and he just glared, brushing past her and disappearing down the hall. After that, she had to sit down.

"You didn't come to dinner," Lucius said, coming quietly into the sitting room. After meeting Draco and losing her appetite, she had gone in and just sat there, staring out the window for the rest of the day. The hours had passed easily, she found, and she barely noticed the day getting darker. The only light now came from sconces in the hallway.

"I didn't know there was dinner," she said, not turning to look at him.

"I'm sorry I forgot to tell you. We have dinner every night at 7 in the family dining room. You remember where it is, I assume."

"Yes."

"Are you hungry?"

"No."

They stayed there in silence, watching the stars come out.

"Felicity, I don't like this any more than you do," he finally said. "I loved Narcissa more than anything. But neither of us have a choice."

"No. You had a choice. You could have chosen a long time ago, and if you really loved your family so much, we wouldn't be in this position at all."

"Be that as it may, I'll expect to see you in bed within the hour." He started to leave.

"Where are you going?"

"To my study. As I said, I'll see you shortly."

The next day he was gone when she woke up. That was better. She got up and looked in the mirror for a long time. She was wearing a nightgown where normally she would wear a Quidditch jersey, and her hair was hanging loose. She hadn't found any kind of toiletries yet, really, and had just been using any old thing that was in the bathtub. Today she would rummage through the drawers and look for hair pins. The skin under her eyes was deep blue. There was a kind of fucked up beauty about it, but nothing she would have chosen.

Felicity felt a cold breeze run across the floor. In a drafty old house this was nothing unusual, but it got her mind spinning. She got dressed in the warmest things she could find, including a beautiful fur lined cloak, and hurried downstairs. She pushed open the front door, and December wind blew her hair back. At the top of the stairs, Draco stood watching her, but she did not feel his presence, or turn to him. For a moment, she felt great hope, and joy, pressing against her ribs, never considering that she might be doing something wrong.

Surely, she thought, there is a way out.

Felicity spent a long time running her hands along the fence. It was wrought iron, bars spaced just slightly too close for her to squeeze through. Anyway, she could feel the strong magic coming from it, and knew the wards wouldn't allow her out, or anyone to even see in. But she kept walking, hope flagging only slightly. The grounds were very extensive, but the sun was only starting to rise, and there was nothing else for her to do.

She walked and walked, never taking her hand off the fence. Once she was about as far from the house as she guessed she would get, she took off her cloak and sucked in hard and tried to squeeze through the fence. No use. She kicked at the frozen ground, trying to dig a hole, but that was futile too, she saw, realizing that she could dig 100 feet on her side only to be met with solid earth where the fence line was. Cloak back on, she continued her walk.

Gnarled groves of trees, fountains and statues of mythic wizards, a labyrinth: nothing she saw surprised her. This was something she and Draco had done hundreds of times, before she had ultimately been sorted into Ravenclaw. They hadn't been allowed to leave the grounds either, and they would run and run, pretending they were somewhere they couldn't be found. In actuality, she realized as she got older, they were nowhere that someone standing on the back balcony with a cheap pair of binoculars couldn't see. But that day it was misty, and she could barely see the Manor at all. She walked on.

The sun had made its crest, and she was starting to get cold. Soon she knew, she would be back at the front door with nowhere to go but inside.

At dinner that night, they sat in near silence. There was wine, but Felicity didn't drink. Draco did, copiously.

"Draco tells me you've been exploring, Felicity," Lucius said.

"You're a snitch," she snapped, turning to Draco.

"There's nothing to hide if you're doing nothing wrong, right?" Draco smirked and raised an eyebrow. Remembering herself, Felicity swallowed hard and took a drink of water.

"No, of course not. Tell me, when does school start again? I forget." What she really meant was that she had no idea at all what day it was.

"I'll be out of your hair within the week, Stepmother."

"There's no need for that, Draco. First names serve us," Lucius said over his glass.

"Of course, Lucius."

Lucius grimaced. "I believe you know what I meant. I'm retiring, you are both excused." With that, he pushed back his chair and left the two children to glare at one another.

True to his word, Draco was gone within a few days. It had been decided he would Floo straight to Snape's office instead of taking the train, and Felicity pressed herself to the wall outside Lucius's study while he and his son said goodbye.

"You have the picture of your mother I gave you, right?"

"Yes, Father."

"Good, that's good." Felicity could hear the distraction in his voice.

"Father, what am I supposed to say? About all this mess?"

"You won't say a word, Draco. If you must talk to someone, Severus will be expecting you." She could hear them embrace.

Earlier that day, she had cornered Draco in the library, begging him with wild eyes to tell someone at school what was happening.

"Please, Draco. Haven't we been good friends? When we were little? Just mention it to anyone, anyone at all. Tell Cho Chang for all I care."

"Felicity, stop." The smirk had slid off his face. He pitied her. "You know I can't tell anyone."

"Just that I'm alive then, just that."

"If anyone finds out you're talking this way, you'll live to regret it."

"I've no doubt the rest of my life will be full of regrets, Draco Malfoy."

"I'm sorry."