After that disastrous first day, the next month and a half of training went on with relatively few hiccups. As the end of the quarter came up, Judger was given the task of coming up with a final exam for the quarter. Fighting one of the other classes was right out, because apparently the other classes were actual elites instead of numbnuts with no other place to go but the Inquisition. Testing them against himself wasn't an option either because he knew himself and he would wind up killing them, so he was out of options.
Then, the universe decided that he was due some goodwill and dropped the Tarl siblings into his lap.
At the outset, the two seemed like a pair of goofy foreign mercs in Gilead for a job, but for anyone involved in politics (or who had to keep tabs on lawmen because there was nothing legal about what they did for a living) they were the most dangerous lawmen on the Eastern Continent.
The pair had effectively grabbed the White Kingdom by the short hair of the ass after the "mysterious death" of its previous ruler, the White Dragon Brulado.
(The leader of the Black Kingdom only smirked and pulled his husband into his lap when asked about it. No one was brave enough to ask any further on the matter.)
Officially, the two were there as diplomats, at the inquisitorial school to witness just what into the training of an elite soldier. Unfortunately, they decided that Class 1-F looked interesting and got the exact opposite of an elite.
So there they stood on the sidelines of a training field watching Judger explain to his quartet of misfits that "one of the nice men in the armor volunteered to fight them one by one as their final exam for the quarter".
That was where things began to go wrong.
In order, here's how it went down.
Nubby started rummaging in his frighteningly deep pockets before pulling out what looked like a sap with a literally nine inch nail sticking out of it.
Otto went into his medkit and pulled out a handful of what looked like scalpels, but from the way the man deftly maneuvered them in between his fingers Judger figured they were something else.
Gyre, in the span of time that Judger took to blink pulled out what seemed like a dozen adhesive explosive charges and their detonators.
And Slasher started making out with 'Millicent'.
As calmly as he could, Judger waved the two foreigners over and explained the situation. Brant, the older of the two siblings, gladly agreed to be their final exam and said he would even go easy on them and only use his shield.
Not being able to decide who would go first, the four incompetents drew straws. Nubby, for once in his life, didn't get the short end of the stick.
The order was decided. Otto, Slasher, Nubby, and Gyre, one after the other, up against a man whose tamest epithet was "Glacial Lion".
As they squared off against each other, Brant raised the massive wall of steel he called a shield. Otto, on the other hand, said a prayer to the god of healers and fanned his scalpels out in his hands before launching one the moment Judger gave the word to start.
Credit where it's due, Otto's aim was impeccable and had it not been for Brant's years of combat reflexes raising the shield up in front of him to deflect the repurposed surgical tool, he would have lost an eye. This did not stop Otto from sending one scalpel after another at him from all angles, kiting around the larger man and barely dodging the savage swings of his shield.
Eventually, one of them found its mark and lodged itself in Brant's cheekbone, buried halfway up the blade in the mustachioed mans nasal passage. Brant responded to this by damn near teleporting in front of Otto and force-feeding him some shield, which sent the poor medic flying into a wall.
Judger called the match there. No need to turn it into a bloodbath.
Slasher, after being pulled off of his sword, made for much more of a show. This time, blows were actually traded. Slasher would get one in on Brant's side, Brant would knock one of Slasher's teeth out with his shield, and the cycle would continue until, finally, it came to one final stand.
Slasher, who had positioned himself at the far end of the training court, charged forward with 'Millicent' pointed straight forward like a jousting lance. Brant, knowing a bull rush when he saw one, dropped to one knee and hunkered down to ring the troopers bell with an impassable wall of steel.
However, instead of Slasher driving his oversized blade through the shield or attempting to and breaking the whole thing and having to find a new girlfriend, he dug the tip down into the dirt just in front of the shield and vaulted over it like a pole vaulter before driving his heel into the back of Brant's head, cracking it on the edge of the shield and knocking him out cold.
Judger, feeling poleaxed and out of his depth, looked to the other of the two siblings.
Callum, feeling generous, said loudly and clearly that he would be happy to stand in for his unconscious brother for the rest of the exam.
Judger thanked the gods and made his way onto the field to drag Brant off the field.
Afterward, Judger was quoted as saying he "could hear the bastard snickering, like this was his idea of a joke".
As Callum readied his spear, Nubby palmed what looked like a simple rock. When Judger gave the signal, Nubby threw it and the thunderstone detonated right before Callum's eyes as it bounced off his helmet. The stumpy trooper charged forward as fast as his legs would carry him, dead set on getting the drop on the apparently blinded and deafened spearman.
Instead he got swept off his stubby little legs and had a spear pointed at his (rather pointy) adam's apple. Nubby, being Nubby, proceeded to do what he did best.
He cheated.
He cracked the heel of his boot against the ground, released the blade hidden in the toe of the footwear, and kicked for the ankle of his attacker.
Rule number 1 of being short: the ankles are always a valid target.
Callum moved his leg out of the way, the point of his spear lifting at the same time, and Nubby hopped back up like some unholy fusion of a rabbit, a goblin, and some sort of rat-person. Back on his feet, Nubby swung with his sap and found resistance against it. Mostly because he had just buried the nail in the haft of Callum's spear. Not being one to waste a potential advantage, Nubby yanked with all his might in a bid to rip the weapon from his foes hands.
Instead, because the universe doesn't think Nubby deserves nice things, the spear broke.
Now, when a sword breaks, that's that, sword broken, only reforging can fix it. A spear, on the other hand when broken turns into a slightly shorter spear and a baton.
And that's how Nubby wound up with a puncture wound in his leg and a dozen bruises about his head and shoulders.
Now, with his spear broken there wasn't a whole lot for Callum to do, so he simply threw his broken weapon to the side and pulled himself into a tight boxing stance, his fists raised in an effort to protect his face. Gyre, on the other hand, looked almost comical.
He had a pile of adhesive explosive under one arm, and his unoccupied hand held a globule of the sticky gooey stuff.
As the signal to start came, Callum moved in quickly, only to be met by a snowball of explosive hurtling toward his face. He dodged a head on collision, but seeing the twitchy soldier draw a detonator from his hip satchel and flip the switch on it, sending Callum hurtling forward in a rush of light and pain was only barely better than taking it to the face.
The wiry trooper wasn't done yet though, already hurling three more balls of sticky bomb at the armored envoy.
Callum's luck (and skill) was only good enough to dodge two of them, the other sticking itself to his chestplate. As Gyre slowly but surely got his explosives stuck to his opponent, Judger noted more and more their strategic placement.
One at the chest to knock him back, one on each of the arms to blow the limb away entirely should need be, one at his hip to potentially immobilize for execution, and other smaller bits smattered across the once pristine armor.
Then, when Callum finally landed a solid uppercut on Gyre, there was a click.
And Gyre's deadman's switch kicked in, sending Callum spinning with explosive momentum as the low-grade explosive detonated.
Now, it didn't maim him, only bruised and singed him, but it still hurt like a bitch.
Judger knew now. They were holding out on him.