After walking Emily home I got back to the Rosewood Inn and stopped by the reception to get Thomas' room number. I had every intention of talking to him, letting him see that this kind of unprofessional behavior got people fired. And if headquarters got wind of it, he wouldn't just be let go, he would be used to set an example so that there would be no similar incidents in the future. There was no room for mistakes or second chances in this job. When he opened the door the whole speech I had practiced in my head while in the elevator just evaporated from my brain. There was something about the way he still had the sheets imprinted on his arms where he rested most of his weight on them that just rubbed me the wrong way. It irritated me that he could sleep through the night without worrying about having the same nightmare over and over again. That he was so unafraid of his own dreams, of the darkness that was inside of him.
I wanted to be rational over the whole thing, instead of being as impulsive as I had always been. But I couldn't help myself; I pushed him back, yelling at him about being responsible or something like that. I honestly don't remember much of the yelling we did. We were fighting, shoving each other as a way to emphasize our points. I couldn't control my emotions, I was mad because I thought if he had done his job I wouldn't have hurt Emily. If he had been with her, I would have somehow known that I wasn't in any danger, that my dreams weren't filtering into my waking hours. That I could somehow control the panic I felt before my elbow connected with someone that turned out to be real and not a figment of my overactive imagination.
The noise turned into actual words the minute Marco stepped in between us and shook me out of whatever stupor I was in. Thomas said something about not knowing what my problem was and I told him that "You want to know what my problem is? My problem is that you don't know how to do your fucking job and it's not mine to pick up your fucking slack because I'm not getting paid overtime to babysit you too." Thomas tries to grab at me but Marco pushes him back, instead he just asks me what I'm talking about. "What am I talking about? What about the fact that Emily was running alone in the forest? It's your job to take care of her. Make sure she doesn't get hurt." To protect her from someone like me. It was stupid but I needed to punish someone for my mistake and he was the closest target.
"What are you saying that now I don't know how to do my fucking job? Please you were still in diapers while I was chasing down perps, learning how to work my way up the ranks. People didn't just hand me shit because of who my daddy i-" Before he finished his sentence I lunged at him, landing a punch so hard that it hurt all the way up from my fist to my elbow. Marco pulled me away before I could keep swinging but not before Thomas managed to clip me right in the face. I hated that whenever one of the guys got jealous or he thought he was more deserving than me, he brought up my father or my grandpa Allen. As if their existence erased my own merits. "Fuck you. And this isn't me thinking I can do your job better than you can. This is me showing you." Thomas tries to laugh but ends up wincing instead because his mouth hurts and his nose is bleeding a bit. "Please if you think you can pull 24 hours shifts better than me, go ahead. In fact, I'll draft the paperwork right now."
"Fine." I answer, trying to challenge him again. "Good." He shouts back before slamming the door to his room. Marco finally lets me go and my body slumps against the wall. I feel like a week old balloon, just completely deflated. He grabs my face and turns it over to inspect the damage, not saying anything yet. He frowns and looks at me before sighing. Fuck. I feel so stupid, the way I always let my pride get the better of me. The way I seem to just fuck things up by reacting instead of thinking things through. "Rambo, you're going to end up losing your job for being so gun ho all the time." I roll my eyes, not at his words but at the fact that he's right. "Come on, don't be like that Paige." He misread my reaction to him. I sigh. This was definitely not the way I wanted to start my day. "Yeah… I… fuck. I'm just mad that you're right. Okay? Happy, you're right." I feel defensive even though he hasn't said anything yet. He laughs. "Of course I'm right." I shake my head at him. "Whatever Ken." I try to act like I don't feel like crying. "Come on, go get cleaned up, you smell bad and look even worse." I swat his hands away and laugh. "Shut up."
I get in the shower, ignoring my reflection in the mirror. I don't want to look at myself, I don't want to think about the fact that now I will be stuck with the one person I wanted to avoid spending too much time with. I hate that I thought defending my stupid pride from that asshole was more important than keeping my cool.
Once I get out I wipe the mirror and take in the way my face looks. It looks as if I'm trying to wink because of how swollen my right eyebrow is. I touch the cut right where my eyebrow ends and it bleeds a little. I wince at the pain and head on over to my suitcase to look for my first aid kit. It felt like such an unnecessary thing to bring with me but now I'm relieved that it's here. I wash my face again, apply some alcohol and put on two butterfly stitches on the cut, hoping that it won't open up while I work.
When I get downstairs Ken is leaning against the car, waiting for me to get in and Bagel is sitting in the backseat, looking miserable and pissed off. "What's up Rambo, ready to roll?" Ken asks me as if today is just another day. I laugh and flip him off. When I get inside and grab my coffee, Thomas protests as to why he didn't get one. "Really bro, you wanted coffee? I'm sorry; I guess I forgot to get you one because I thought it would smear your lipstick." Ken says. I snort as I try not to laugh, I totally see it now, it does look like he has lipstick because of how half of his mouth is all red and swollen. He curses us under his breath and looks outside his window for the rest of the car ride over to the Fields' place.
When Bubbles opens the door he sighs and stares at me, waiting for an explanation. I shrug my shoulders and pretend that I don't know what he's asking me about. After a minute or two Mrs. Fields comes out to usher us inside her home she gasps. Shit. We probably look worse than I thought. "Oh my goodness, what happened to you both? Did you get into any sort of trouble?" She asks, clearly concerned about our wellbeing. We both kind of grumble as an answer and she steps aside so we can go inside. I try to smile but it makes my head hurt so I just say good morning to her and tell her that whatever she is making for breakfast smells lovely. Ken and I sit down while Bagel stands around awkwardly because he ate at the hotel. I guess we somehow forgot to tell him that we always had breakfast with Mrs. Fields. I wonder how that could have ever slipped our minds…
Emily comes into the kitchen just as Mrs. Fields is setting our plates down in front of us. I tell her that she didn't have to make us breakfast, like I always do and she laughs and tells me that it isn't any trouble at all. I thank her and blush as I look down at my plate. I can feel Emily staring at me from where she's sitting. Ken mumbles something as he chews and Mrs. Fields sighs and tells him not to talk while he's eating. I laugh and he kicks me under the table. I glare at him as I rub my leg. When Mrs. Fields turns away for just a second I grab a slice of bacon off of his plate. Emily gasps and then stares up at my face again before looking up at Bagel and then back to me again.
When Mrs. Fields clears the table and Emily stands up to go to her room I stand up with her. She looks confused and before she can ask I give her a half smile and tell her that I'll be working with her now. She looks between Thomas and me again before looking at her mother, unsure of what's going on. Before Mrs. Fields can come at me with a barrage of questions I try to reassure them that it's nothing out of the ordinary. "President Ford. He was a really athletic guy, he swam daily and he was an amazing skier. In fact, he was so good that he often left the agents protecting him in his dust and he would taunt them because they couldn't keep up with him on the slopes. So the Secret Service had to recruit a world class skier who could keep up with him as a way to keep him safe in all sorts of terrain." Mrs. Fields looked between Thomas and me before smiling, looking a little relieved as to why I was telling her that we switched agents. "And since Emily and I met on our morning runs today, I suggested to agent Scott that perhaps we had another Ford on our hands, someone that was a great athlete and needed an agent that could keep up with her so that she could be as safe as possible while leading her life as she normally would. Morning runs and all." Mrs. Fields smiled up and touched her daughter's arm, she had tears in her eyes, she looked overwhelmingly proud of her daughter. "That's wonderful, did you hear that honey?" Emily smiled and rubbed her mother's back. "Yeah, that sounds really cool mom."
She stared back at Thomas and then at me once again and headed up to her room. I followed her and closed the door behind me. Emily stood in the middle of her room before sighing and turning around. She looked at me as if she was trying to read my mind and it made me uncomfortable. I looked around her room, anywhere but to where she was standing so I wouldn't have to meet her eyes because I knew that if she asked me what happened, I wouldn't be able to hide the truth. Emily moved closer to me and I tried not to breathe in too deeply. I don't want to let her overwhelm my senses but that is made impossible when she takes my right hand in both of hers and studies it closely. I bite down on the tip of my tongue so I won't wince as she starts poking softly at the skin. "Did you and agent Scott get into some sort of fight? Is that the real reason why you're taking care of me now instead of him?" I sigh and look up at the ceiling before answering her. "We didn't get into a fight… we just had a difference of opinion. But we came to an agreement and so now I'm here. That's all." She smiles and shakes her head from side to side before stepping in a little closer; invading my personal space and making the rest of the room disappear as I stare into her eyes. "You're a terrible liar. Just so you know." I laugh and brush my thumb against the tips of her fingers, the ones still holding onto my hand. "But I'm glad you said all that stuff to my mom. I think she's going to brag about it to my dad and everyone in town. So thanks." I look down at our hands and then up at her face again before answering her. "That wasn't a lie. Ford really did need someone who could keep up with him." Emily turns her head to the side and tries to hold back a smile; I wish I could read her every thought. "You think you can keep up with me then, agent McCullers?" I smile and drop my hand from hers before answering her. "I know I can." I say as confidently as I can because I was never one to back down from a challenge.