I'm so sorry that I disappeared for a while, I've had exams all the time with school, and I've been struggling a lot with depression, so I lost motivation... no excuses though and I'm ginna try get back on track, this chapter's only short but I'm gonna try and get the next one done real soon...

I didn't know what to do with myself, I'd tried calling San, texting her, skype, facebook, twitter, every possible method of contact that you could think of, I knew I was probably bugging her but I needed to know what was going on.

I'd replayed the moment over and over again in my mind, and as much as I knew this shouldn't be the case, I knew that I'd wanted to kiss her, it had been perfectly clear in my actions, I'd leaned in for God's sake, my eyes had closed before her's, well if her's had, obviously I didn't see because my eyes were shut.

It's not like she would have been guilty about the fact I had a boyfriend, that had never stopped her doing more than just kiss the jocks when she knew they had girlfriends, so why would this be any different, it's not like she'd stopped because she was friends with Artie, because she wasn't, she hated his guts.

I was finding it so hard, I was confused, majorly so, I didn't know what to do.

By this point it was about 9.20pm so, realising it wasn't too late, I decided on having a shower, all my best ideas come in the shower so it was the place to be, I undressed, turned on the water and stepped beneath the flow.
I stood there for fifteen painfully long minutes before realising that tonight the shower wasn't going to be my saviour.

I blew my hair dry before straightening it, and then threw on some leggings.
I'd worked out what I was going to do.
At last.

I opened my closet, grabbed the first sweater that came to my hand and pulled it over the plain white shirt I'd put on, it was large and warm, and had a familiar smell to it, it brought me comfort, and that was the main thing I needed at the moment so it was perfect. It hung loosely from me, being overly large, and I felt like if there was need I'd be able to shrink away and disappear into it.

I wondered what my mom and dad would say about me leaving the house at this time, it was nearly 10pm, and although I knew this wasn't that late it was a school night, so I couldn't see my parents being completely happy with my decision to go out now.

I slipped out of the front door quickly, without them even noticing I had done so, at least something was going my way tonight, I was worried that starting the ignition of my car would disturb my parents, because of they noticed I was gone I was sure to be grounded for quite some time to come, I looked towards the window of my house and could see a blue coloured blur through the curtains, the TV was on so I should be okay.

I started my car and drove off, quickly, down the road.
Anxiety was getting the better of me, but one thing crossed my mind, San was already ignoring me, so things couldn't get any worse, it wasn't possible, nothing was worse than being ignored by her, at least after this I'd know where I stood.

When I pulled onto Santana's drive, I was grateful to see that neither of her parents were at home, this wasn't a rare occurrence, as they both had a lot of serious work commitmens, but it would've been just my luck for them to have been home tonight.

I walked to the door and knocked as hard as I could, knowing that the door bell didn't work, normally I just walked straight into the house, it virtually being my second home, but tonight that didn't feel right, I knocked again and then sat down on the door step to wait, after two minutes the door hadn't been answered, so I decided I'd just walk in.

Dammit! The door was locked, it was never locked, the door was always open here.

This left me with only one other option, I was not going home until I had seen Santana, I knew the six foot gate leading to the back yard would be locked, but I had no other choice, using all the upper body strength i had acquired from dancing for so many years, I lifted myself up and over the gate, jumping down onto the ground on the other side.

I ran round to the back of the house and looked up at San's dark red curtains, I could just make out the light coming through them, so I knew she must be awake, whatever I chose to do next would come across as very Romeo and Juliet, the options were:
1. throw pebbles at the window to get her attention or 2. climb up onto San's balcony and knock on the glass doors...

My decision was both, I figured that I would have just enough time to scramble up onto the balcony, using the ladder San hung folded off the balcony to jump onto, then haul myself up the last bit, before she got to the door from the sound of the pebble.

I picked up three, threw the first at the window straightaway, the second as I got to the ladder, which was a good 7 feet off the floor, and knowing I'd have to use all my strength and speed, pulled myself up, when I got to the railing to climb over I threw the third, and then I stood, panting, in the corner, leaning against the railing, hoping I'd be partially concealed by the dark.

I'd been bent over trying to regain my breath from the speed climb when I heard the click of a lock, and there she was, the one person who I had desperately wanted to see, and I can tell you now, she looked like she definitely didn't want to see me.

Thanks again for reading, reviews would really be appreciated, especially if I could get 10 by the next chapter? Next chapter's going to get a bit angsty, but things can only get better... Phoenix xx