My apologies for the wait. Sorry to break your heart, but read the author's note at the end.
And yes, I do (not) own Bleach.
As Renji set down the fork, he burped loudly. "Ya know, I figured you would try to poison me or something, but damn, Ichigo! This crap is great!"
"I'd say thanks if you hadn't eaten all of that crap," Ichigo growled. This really sucked. Yesterday Rukia had to have seen him draped over that TV like some weak stuffed animal-no pun intended-and had to have taken care of him while he was half-dead. Then, today, for some reason, she was extra moody. After he burnt the rice in an attempt to make lunch for the two of them, they fought for another three hours. To cap it off, Renji decided to stop by the house, figuring that he'd mooched off of Urahara enough for the time being. So now Ichigo had to provide for two annoying Shinigami.
And of course, today was a rainy day.
He thanked the gods above that his family was on vacation for another month.
Since the fight was technically his fault, Ichigo tried to make amends by buying Rukia a cheesecake with Chappy on it.
Which Renji promptly devoured.
"What's the big deal? It was just a cake. And why the hell are you in such a foul mood?" Renji asked.
"Let's see, some guy who I thought already had a place to stay barges in here and eats my cake. No, I really don't see how that would annoy me off at all," retorted Ichigo. "I was going to say sorry to Rukia with that!"
"But why with a cake? Couldn't you just say sorry? Well, you've really pissed her off," Renji replied offhandedly. Suddenly, he grinned. "Wait a minute…you're being all moody over a dumb cake because you've got the hots for her! Holy shit!" He guffawed loudly.
"What the-no, you dumbass!" Ichigo went crimson, punching Renji in the arm. "You moron, I'm just cheering her up!" Renji was still chortling. "Shut up!" he yelled.
"Oh? Then why are you so worked up? If you really didn't care for Rukia, then you wouldn't be all pissy like you are now. Wait till I tell Rangiku about this! She'll tell the whole Seireitei and ol' Captain Kuchiki's gonna hunt down your sorry ass! Maybe I should invite her over right now!"
"You sure as hell better not! You tell her, and I'll tell her about your crush on Hinamori!" Ichigo yelled back.
Renji looked confused. "What the hell? I would never throw Zabimaru at her."
"No, you moron! You've 'got the hots for her,' and I'm gonna tell Matsumoto about it!"
"OVER MY DEAD BODY, ASSHOLE!"
"So you do like her!"
"Who says I do?"
"Prove it!"
"I'll fight you for it!"
"Bring it on!"
"Not in here!"
"Why the hell not?"
"JUST FIGHT AND SHUT THE HELL UP ALREADY!" a loud and rather feminine voice yelled.
Both men froze.
"Oh…shit. How long have you been awake?" Ichigo said tentatively.
A rumpled-looking Rukia emerged from the bedroom, grumbling, "About the time one of you two yelled, 'Over my dead body, asshole.' And what girl are you guys yelling about anyways?"
"Uh, no one!" both boys yelled in unison. "No one?" they yelled again.
"Why don't you just do that dance thingy to fight? I'm kinda sick of your shitty duels," Rukia sleepily snapped.
Ichigo recoiled from the anger in her voice. "Rukia…I'm sorry…" he began.
"And maybe I'll forgive you if the two of you shut up and let me rest." With that, she ambled back to the bedroom.
An awkward silence filled the air. "So…what's this dance thingy Rukia's talking about?" Renji started.
Ichigo started to explain the concept of DDR to Renji, hoping to Kami that he wouldn't have to kill himself again.
Three hours later, Rukia awoke again. Strange, she thought. I can't hear Ichigo or Renji. What happened?
She went out into the living room again to find Renji and Ichigo in the most provocative position: both boys lying asleep, one on top of the other, with arms and limbs entangled.
"Did you two get around to actually dancing, or did you just have sex?" she asked the boys. For the second time in two days, Ichigo stirred after another exhausting DDR session. He took one bleary look at Rukia, then wondered what the weight on his chest was.
"GET THE HELL OFF OF ME, GAYBO!"
I am slightly obsessed with the manga. Only slightly.
Episode 152 (Or is it 53?)
"I, Arrancar Ciento Tres, will crush you!"
"...
You're a celery tray?"
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Hey, you awesome readers!
I am sorry to say that I can't go anywhere with this story, so I won't continue it. However, I am offering Soul Dance Revolution to anyone who can write a good fanfic. If you'd like to take my story and finish it, send me a personal message. Thanks!
~Kiroku~
