Chapter 3
Rory had been reading for about a half an hour. Lorelai had brought her coffee after fifteen minutes and she was able to continue reading even though the lump in her throat reformed every time she looked at Jess. She noticed that Luke had come into the room and sat in the chair and had promptly fallen asleep, but she just leaned closer to Jess, lowered her voice, and continued to read. Ayn Rand was really not the best but she wanted to feel like she was doing something to help. Her mind continued to wander though. What if he was never the same? What if he never woke… she stopped those thoughts before they could go any further because then she would start crying.
She stopped abruptly when she noticed that something was happening with the machines. She looked closer at Jess and he seemed to be jerking and breathing rapidly.
"Luke!" Rory cried, and Luke jerked awake and quickly came to Jess' side and grabbed his hand while yelling for a doctor. Before any could come in though, Jess jerked upright, gasping and breathing heavily, his wide open in a wild panic.
"Jess?" Rory and Luke both cried moving forward to grab him to try and comfort him. He looked continuously around the room, his eyes not landing on anything, not recognizing anything, not focusing. Luke had also a blind moment of panic, before the doctors rushed in and starting messing with the machines. Luke jerked in shock as he felt a hand grab his and he looked to see Jess looking directly at him, still with wild eyes, which then turned to look at Rory, who was crying. Jess looked at her blankly, and then his eyes rolled to the back of his head and he collapsed on the bed.
Both Luke and Rory sat down in shock. Luke took a moment and then looked at the doctors.
"Is he ok?"
"His brain functions are better than they were. It shows definite signs of improvement that he woke up, and at least was responsive, but we still have to wait until he fully wakes up. This sleep however is lighter than the coma before, so there is hope." The doctor looked at Luke with sympathy. He looked up to see Lorelai enter the room. Rory quickly rushed to her mom, biting back a sob. He had woken up. But it was the scariest thing she could think of. It just brought on more fears that he would not be the same after this, he didn't even recognize her. He didn't even recognize her! She started crying harder as her mom soothingly ran her fingers through her hair, mumbling words of encouragement.
Luke couldn't take it anymore. He had to get out before he lost it. He gently pushed the two of them outside the room, and when Chris moved to help comfort Rory, he stalked off into a room he knew was vacant. He slammed the door shut and then leaved heavily against the wall, taking deep breaths. He was trying to stop the tears that threatened to fall but couldn't. He didn't want to go through this again. Not again. He had already been through this with his parents, each dying from an illness that had forced them to spend their last days in the hospital gasping for life. He couldn't take it. He turned blindly and punched the wall as hard as he could. He then collapsed against the wall breathing in slowly. Jess was going to be okay. He was going to be okay. He had woken up, at least, that was a good sign, but… the wild look in the boy's eyes would probably haunt him for the rest of his life. That wasn't Jess. Jess had always layers of emotions in his eyes, walls that you couldn't break through without a sledge hammer. It was how he had managed to live for so long in such rough circumstances. But this… Never had he seen him so broken. It hurt.
Luke took a few more deep breaths before remembering that Rory and Lorelai were still there and Rory would be more scared than him. He pulled himself off the floor, wiped his face to make sure there were no tears, and then went back to his nephew's room, noticing that Lorelai and Rory had not moved from where he had gently moved them. He moved to Jess' side and took his hand gently.
Lorelai tried to fight back tears as her baby girl was sobbing her heart out and as one of her best friends was standing alone devastated. How did things get this bad? She had seen from the hallway where she and Christopher had been sitting Jess wake up and his panicked reaction. She hoped that it was improvement but really now all she could feel was the mounted tension in the room. The lingering question of Will he be the same? was hanging above everyone. She felt Rory pull away from her slightly, and she looked down at her beautiful daughter. She read the question on her face in an instant and shook her head. "You can come back tomorrow. For now, let's go home." Rory nodded slowly, before wiping her tears and moved to where Luke was sitting. He turned to her, fought the exhaustion off of his face, and smiled gently at her.
"Thank you, Rory." He whispered. She nodded again. "I'll see you tomorrow." She turned and the three moved to leave the hospital. Suddenly there was a moan from the bed. A panicked groan, almost a scream. They all quickly looked back at Jess, whose eyes were still closed, but was saying something.
"Jess? Jess, come on man, wake up." Luke begged his nephew, leaning closer to him so that he could hear what he was trying to say.
"ROOORRRYY" Jess groaned, barely audible. He was thrashing as if he was having a bad dream. Luke quickly looked up and turned to look into Rory's shocked face.
"He's calling for you…" Luke whispered. Rory nodded, and with a nudge of permission from her mom moved forward to take Jess's hand and leaned forward and whispered "I'm here, I'm here, you're going to be okay." Jess stopped groaning but continued to thrash, although not as violently. Rory put a soothing hand through his hair and repeated herself for what seemed like hours, but was only really a few minutes, until he finally calmed down into a deep sleep, his hand still gripped in hers. Rory never looked away from him, but she sensed Lorelai and Luke leaving the room. She pulled up a chair closer to his bed and laid her head down, and she couldn't help but smile. There was hope.
Lorelai gently nudged Luke, motioning to him that she wanted to talk. He hesitated, lingering on Jess' face before moving to follow Lorelai out into the hallway. She ignored Chris besides a slight shake of the head that he was not to follow them and then led Luke to the chairs they had sat in before.
"Is it alright if she stays here for a bit longer?" Luke asked, still whispering. It seems like his voice was going the way of his strength, both slowly leaking out at the exhaustion of the events still pounded on him. He looked into Lorelai's eyes and could see kindness, something he had missed these last few days. This was his Lorelai, the one that annoyed the hell out of him every day, but still was able to make him fell like there was something good in the world with her smile.
"I was just about to ask you that." Lorelai said, smiling slightly. "I'll run home and grab her some things, and then I'll be back. DO you want me to bring you anything? An air mattress, maybe? Although this is a hospital I'm sure they could lend you one." Luke shook his head, quickly. He nodded gratefully, as she leaned over and squeezed his hand before getting up and walking over to Chris, who had been watching and who had to quickly shake off his frown.
Luke suddenly thought about Liz. Should he call her? His first thought was a quick no, she wouldn't do anything about it. But maybe? NO. He'll call her when Jess was fully awake and functioning. Another thought popped into his head but he quickly dismissed it. One deadbeat parent was enough. There was no need to involve Jess' father. Anyways, he didn't even know how to get in touch with him. Liz might have the number, but that would involve calling Liz, and he had already dismissed that. Suddenly, he was incredibly hungry. Maybe he should get something to eat? What about the diner? Luke groaned again as he thought about how much he was going to fall behind in everything if he continued to keep his diner closed. But there was no other choice. He really wished that Liz was here, or maybe someone who knew better how to handle this. Luke sighed heavily and went into Jess' room and fell asleep again on those incredibly uncomfortable chairs.
Every since he was about 8 or 9, Jess had been plagued by incredibly vivid nightmares. He was usually able to snap out of it before he got to the screaming stage now, and it had only happened once or twice in Stars Hollow, but that was one of the reasons why he blared music when he slept. He found that it kept the nightmares away. When he was younger, they usually involved his mother being either drunk or high. She would be screaming at him, waving her hands around, which usually were full of some vodka bottle, and there was glass everywhere. And then he would be stuck. He couldn't get out of the room, or the house, as she would rant at him. He would become so scared that she would hit him, or hurt herself, when she would collapse. He would always try and wake her up and that was when he would wake up screaming. As he grew older, they would involve things that he had seen on the streets, now that he old enough to go out of the house. Things he would never mention to anyone, but always still plagued his sleep. There was this one time…
Jess loved to sit in the park and read. No one bothered him there. No one cared. Everyone was in there own little world, just trying to survive. Tonight he had brought along one of his favorites, Catcher and the Rye and had settled down for a long haul. Suddenly a screeched interrupted him, jerking him upright. It wasn't a normal sound, and he knew the sounds of the park. He got and ran at a sprint towards that sound and he found a girl being roughly forced unto the ground by three large guys. Jess didn't even hesitate as he threw his slightly smaller than average 15 year old body at the large men, trying to pull them off the girl. They turned and pulled a knife, yelling at him to mind his own business and get the hell out. In his dreams, everything turned into slow motion as he started fighting the men, every blow magnified tenfold. Out of the corner of his eye he saw the girl running away. Good, he thought before seeing the glint of the knife, and then the fear of what they could do to him…
And he would always wake up screaming. He still had the scar from the knife wound that had slashed his arm, and could still remember the bruises that they made when they pushed him down and… he was never so thankful for the police that had come running in at the right moment. He never went back to the park, and the nightmares only stopped being every night after a year had passed.
When Liz was in one of her sober moods that may last a few weeks or so, she tried to convince him to go to a psychiatrist. That argument didn't last very long. He usually just walked out on her, leaving her yelling that she was his mother he had to listen, and punched the first thing that he could find, which was usually a door or a wall. Why, how, could she think that taking notice of him every once in awhile meant that he was required to respect her? Yeah he loved his mom, in a way that he would be sad if she died, but not in the way that he would be able to carry on a conversation for longer than 5 minutes without becoming incredibly angry.
He had started walking, haunting the streets of New York City at night, which every in the right mind knew was a death wish. But he learned a lot. After the incident in the park, he learned to fight. He bummed his first smoke from some homeless guy, he got his first drink from another, he had his first girl… that didn't turn out very well. Things continued to change as he grew older, he continued to learn and see things. The only way he could truly keep the bad things from haunting him in the daylight were his books. He read for the enjoyment of being able to be in somebody else's mind for once, experience someone else's experiences. He loved it.
But at night things came back. He couldn't escape them in his sleep. He had started to wish he had insomnia. But towards the end, before he came to Stars Hollow, he was spiraling so off the edge that he never could remember his dreams. It was a miracle that he had made it to Stars Hollow in one piece.
This time, however, his nightmare was different and completely new. It had started off peacefully.
"How about you try concentrating?" Rory said, trying to hide her smirk as he played with the deck of cards.
"I am concentrating; do you know how hard it is to do this trick?" He smirked at her, quirking his eyebrow when he saw her roll her eyes. He grinned inwardly knowing that she really wasn't upset. He loved that he could see this sort of mischievous side of her.
"Come on read this last chapter and we'll go get ice cream…" She was reaching, trying to find a compromise.
"In cones?"
"What?"
"Ice cream is always better in cones." She smiled at him, and he felt like he had no care in the world. Like nothing bad had ever happened to him. She was so beautiful.
"Alright let's go." And then suddenly they were in a car. He didn't know whose car, it looked unfamiliar to him, but he and Rory were laughing and talking and eating ice cream and then suddenly… the force of the impact made his head snap back, and his body scream in pain. Everything was a blur, with glass breaking and screams filling the air. Then all he could see was Rory, lying so still. He moved to reach out to her, but found that he couldn't move. Blood was dripping down her face….
"Rory!" He screamed, "Rory!" Then he felt pressure on his hand and a soft voice ripping through the panicked filled car.
"I'm here, I'm here, you're alright." That didn't calm him that much, he didn't care if he was alright, was she? But the pressure on his hand was soothing and he was able to calm down… and the nightmare was over. He finally felt safe.
Lorelai's mind was still reeling as she pulled into her driveway, with Chris pulling in behind her. She started to feel even guiltier about what she had said to Luke when Jess was obviously in pain or whatever was going on. She had kept Rory away from Jess for 5 whole days. 5 days! Yeah, she hadn't told Rory outright she couldn't visit him, but she never even considered that it might help. And Luke… she stopped up short when she saw Dean sitting on their steps. She sighed inwardly. She was so tired. Dean stood up to meet them, and murmured a soft hello to Chris, who stepped past him and let himself into the house.
"Hi Lorelai." Dean sounded incredibly sad. Lorelai sighed again. Dean was having trouble dealing with Rory. He wanted to be supportive because she had been hurt, but he also wanted to be mad at Jess for not only wrecking his car but also hurting Rory. And on the other hand he also saw how upset Rory was.
"Dean. What's up?" Lorelai asked.
"Well, I was hoping that I could see Rory?" Dean asked, noticing that Rory wasn't with them. His heart sank.
"She's at the hospital."
"Oh is she alright?" Dean asked, panicked.
"Yeah, she's fine." Lorelai hesitated, but knew that it should be out in the open. "She's visiting Jess. He woke up, well sort of, but she was really a help so I am going to take some things to her." Lorelai saw Dean's face tighten into a frown.
"Oh, Ok." Dean sighed.
"Dean." Lorelai prompted, knowing that the boy wanted to talk.
"She's going to be with him a lot, isn't she?"
Lorelai sighed. "Yes, she is… Dean, look. I know you might be uncomfortable with this, but he woke up because of her. She is really helping not only him, but also Luke and herself."
Dean was quiet for a moment. He ached for the simpler times with Rory, when they had great times watching movies and talking, and him watching her spend hours buying books. When they did fight, it was about little things, or about things that could be settled in a simple calm talk. But now, ever since he came their arguments had become fiercer, more damaging and the same one over and over again. He knew that he was no good. She didn't believe him. He knew that he was messing with them. She refused to stop spending time with him. He saw the glances, the flirting, the talking about books, and the way he showed up every time they were doing good. And then the accident. He still wanted to punch the lights out of him, but then he remembered that he was in a coma and he felt slightly guilty. Only for a few seconds and then he would see his car and could just imagine Rory and Jess together and it made his blood boil. And now he was crawling his way in because he needed help. He needed to talk to Rory, but her mother was also good to talk to.
"What should I do?" he asked, trying to sound like he wasn't scared. Because he was. He was mad as hell, but he was also scared of losing her.
"Oh, hon, the best thing you can do is be there for her. And know that she still loves you." Lorelai replied, hoping that that would be enough, even when a feeling in her gut told her that Dean really had no chance against Jess. She remembered the tender look on Rory's face as she brushed her fingers through Jess's hair. She sighed again inwardly. Dean nodded and then turned to leave.
"Can you tell her to call me when she can?" Dean asked, meeting her eyes with pleading sad eyes. Lorelai nodded. And then she moved into her house where she can saw Christopher watching from the window.
"Is he going to be okay?" Christopher asked when Lorelai entered the room.
"No, but hopefully he will be. He's just worried about Rory."
"Should we be worried about Rory?" Chris asked hesitantly. He really didn't want to get into a fight again.
"I think once they know for sure that Jess will be okay, she will be okay."
"Are you ok?" Lorelai turned to him, suddenly grateful that she had someone there for her. Luke she swallowed her guilt and had to turn away. Luke had nobody. But Chris was here for her and she loved him for it. But Luke…
"Lore?"
"I'm alright" Lorelai responded, turning again to face him. "I'm just so tired." He nodded. "And hungry."
"Let's get some food, then. Where do you want to go?"
"We could go to Luke's…" Lorelai again was stabbed with guilt as she remembered that Luke's had been closed every since the accident. She was preoccupied, so she missed the look that flashed across Chris's face.
"Isn't it closed?" Chris really wanted to get as far away from the topic of Luke as possible. He understood when Lorelai had told him that he was might hurt Rory when he blamed Luke, but he still didn't like the looks that Lorelai was giving the guy. He couldn't figure them out, it seemed like guilt and sadness and little bit of something else. He didn't have the guts to ask though. He just knew that he had to keep her away from him. Away from Luke.
"Yeah, I forgot. How about Chinese?" Lorelai breezed into the hallway to pick up the phone and make their order. She the plopped herself down on the sofa, and Chris moved to start rubbing her shoulders. She groaned gratefully as she felt some of the tension leave her. Then she felt a shiver run through her as he kissed her neck. She closed her eyes and leaned back as he continued to work magic on her neck with his mouth. She grabbed his hand and motioned for him to come around to her side of the sofa and he did so with a look of satisfaction and anticipation. But right as he was about to kiss her again a phone rang shrilly. They both groaned and Chris pulled his phone out of his pocket, and looked at the caller id with surprise.
"Ignore it." Lorelai said as moved over and started kissing his neck. He pulled back, hesitated, but then shook his head and answered the phone with an entirely fake smile on his face.
"Hello?"
"Christopher?" A woman's voice responded, "Where are you babe?"
"I'm in Stars Hollow." Chris said running and hand through his hair and moving off the couch, motioning to Lorelai that he would be right back. She nodded while turning on the TV and pushing off her shoes to become more comfortable. He smiled gently, she is so beautiful.
"Why?" she sounded angry and he could hear her opening a bottle. He sighed.
"I told you, Sherry, Rory was in an accident. She broke her arm and I'm here to help Lorelai with her."
"Oh… Lorelai, I should have known." He heard a crash and was about to ask about it when she continued, "Did you two sleep together yet?"
"Sherry." Chris sighed. Sherry had always been blunt, painfully so. She was beautiful, driven and ambitious, but also wanted kids and a family and stability. She thought that he could provide it for her, but when things starting going not as planned, she drank. He had come home late one night, and she was convinced that he had been cheating on her, so she had drank a whole bottle of vodka. He had found her lying passed out in the bathroom and it broke his heart. But now was different. He wanted to be with Lorelai.
"Sherry, I meant to talk to you earlier…"
"You moved out. Without telling me, while I was on a business trip." Chris cringed. "And now I find out you're with your ex girlfriend and mother of your child. Just be straight with me Chris, goddamn, I deserve the truth." If Lorelai had been listening she would have instantly replied by quoting A Few Good Men, 'You can't handle the truth'. But thankfully Lorelai wasn't listening and he knew that Sherry wouldn't get the reference. So he sighed and mentally braced himself to do something he had not realized until recently that he had wanted to do for a long time.
"Sherry, I can't do this anymore."
"You bastard. You didn't even have the guts to say it to my face?..." Chris sighed again as Sherry went on to curse him and rant and rave before finally hanging up. He stayed still for a moment, quickly thinking of a story for Lorelai if she asked questions.
"That was Sherry?" He jumped and turned around to find Lorelai watching him with a calm expression that was also slightly confused and he could also read the accusation in it. Damn.
Lorelai had tried really hard not listen in to the conversation, but the repeated mention of the name Sherry got her curious. Chris had told her that she was no longer in the picture. Why was she calling him? Had Chris lied to her? She had heard his last statement and was even more confused. She could tell by his face though, as he refused to look her in the eyes, and was glancing around the room. She could tell that he was trying to find a story that would meet her curiosity.
"Look, Lore. Sherry just called to tell me she would be out of the house tomorrow and that I could go pick up the rest of my stuff then." Chris said smoothly, moving forward to take Lorelai's hands. He leaned in hesitantly for a kiss, and sighed mentally in relief when she responded to his a kiss. She pulled back after a second though and looked him straight in the eyes.
"Everything is ok right?"
"Yes, Sherry and I are done. I am with you now. If that is what you want?" When he saw the small smile on her face he moved into for another kiss, this one more passionate. He smiled inwardly when Lorelai started leading them towards the sofa.
This time he woke up slowly. First he felt a tingling in his body as if it had become numb. And then a slight burn when he tried to move it. Then he could hear movement and he could smell… sterile. That was the only word to describe it. He didn't want to think too much about it because the next thing he felt was pressure on his hand. A slight comforting pressure that he had didn't remember being there. He slowly opened his eyes and saw white. The walls were white. He was in a hospital? He groaned before realizing that he had groaned out loud.
Rory had been sleeping fitfully for the last few hours. She jerked awake however for no real apparent reason, and decided to go get something to drink. She was hesitant to leave him, but Luke managed to convince her that he would be here and it would be alright. She had just walked into the room when she him open his eyes and look around the room and then groan. She cried out without realizing it and flew to his side.
"Jess? Jess? Oh God, Luke, he's awake." Luke jerked awake from his chair and moved forward to take Jess' other hand. Jess simply looked at them, his eyes a little panicked.
"Jess?" Luke said, as doctors started coming into the room, Dr. Ramon walked over to stand beside Luke and leaned forward towards Jess.
"Jess? Please can you answer some questions? My name is Dr. Ramon, please can you look at me?" Jess nodded meeting the doctors eyes. "Good, do you know your name?" Jess opened his mouth but nothing came out. He cleared his throat and then hoarsely replied "Jess." There was a huge sigh of relief from all around the room as Luke and Rory grinned happily at each other. "Do you know what year it is?" "2002" "Who is president?" "Bush" "Do you recognize them?" The doctor asked finally, motioning to both Rory and Luke.
The next few seconds seemed like an eternity as Jess looked at both Luke and Rory, slowly. They both held their breath.