A/N

How do I put this...I'm a jerk. I actually have had a pretty eventful moth or two (family deaths, issues with a team of kids threatening me, but it's boring, so I'll just move on). I could ramble on with the apologies, but since it's been such a long wait, I figure you'll just want the chapter. So here it is.

Chapter Three: I Remember Why Annabeth Always Fed The Kids

The entire camp seemed to shake. Not just a little 'Oh, wow, a monster!' shake, like a 'Oh, gods, there's an army of monsters' shake. So, of course, I hopped up and ran to see what went down. By the time the shaking stopped, I could already see the problem. Singular. As in that army? It was actually just one giant...thing. I knew what it was, but it was just...wrong. Have you ever seen a baby after eating? With all the food smeared over its mouth, swinging the little plastic utensils around? This was sort of like that, but instead of a little spoon, it was a tree, instead of food, it was...the last meal it had, I figure, and instead of a baby, it was-Wait, no. It really was a giant baby.

Fifty feet tall, and stumbling around like Nico after his first drink, this thing looked insane. The campers, to their credit, were already trying to fight it off, and the Ares cabin was already barking out orders. Times don't change, I guess. Anyway, this was all sort of on the fly, because I was running toward the giant baby, Annabeth already a few feet ahead of me.

It really got insane once the monster passed through camp borders. It was actually inside the camp. I don't know how, but it was. It didn't matter, though. I had a job to do. I charged, slashing at it with riptide, which was already out of my pocket and extended. The giant baby-booties it was wearing seemed to be made of some type of metal, and just deflected the blow. The baby lifted up its foot, and I had to jump out of the way to avoid being squashed. I swear I could see my kids and Chiron already fighting, too, but I was way too focused. Annabeth gave me a signal. We'd had this maneuver down for years, and we both knew what to do.

I grabbed her foot and flung her as high as I could into the air, towards the giant menace. She swung her knife, but got picked off by a giant hand, and hoisted into the air. Dragging her to its mouth, the monster seemed to think this was all a game. I needed to think fast. Otherwise it'd be over for Annabeth, and she'd be baby-chow. I jumped, as high as I could, and managed to slash at the area below its knee in a feeble attempt to stop it.

If you thought it was weird before, get this. There was blood. Not dust. Not a 'poof', blood. Lots of blood. I don't know what happened, but I panicked. My heart was racing, my head was pounding, and I was coated in a layer of this red gloop. I passed out nearly instantly after that.

Waking up is never fun. We've been through that, I think. The weird thing is that I couldn't move. My eyes were open, and I couldn't move a muscle. I groaned out, trying to figure out where I was, and only a muffled 'mmphg!' came out. Chiron was there, I know that. We were in the infirmary, which was familiar. He looked sort of...worried. I don't know why, since the fact that I was here meant that the camp won, but he looked rather freaked out.

"Percy, this is going to sound like an impossibility, but please try to understand."

He seemed like he was trying to convince himself more than me, but I was listening.

"That creature you fought was a half-blood."

Oh. Maybe he was trying to convince me.

"That's how it got through the magic barrier. This camp is open to all half-bloods, including children of Hebe."

Where did I know that name from? I really didn't remember what she was the goddess of, but I tried no nod, anyway. He pulled out a small bundle from behind his back, revealing a small baby. He nodded at me, like I was supposed to look, and that's where I saw it. It has a flesh wound right on its left knee. Right where I...Oh, gods. This was the weirdest day ever.

"I don't know why, but Hebe sent her son to attack the camp. She knew he could get through the barrier, and as soon as you nicked him, he shrunk down to regular size, and has been sleeping ever since."

Well, that wasn't so bad. Other than the baby, this situation seemed bearable.

"Percy, again, please understand that I have no real knowledge of an incident like this ever happening," he started, beginning to wheel his wheelchair around the room, almost frantically, "You've been turned back into a teenager. You're perfectly stable health-wise, but as soon as we picked you out of the puddle of blood, you looked like you did over twenty years ago."

I passed out again. You can understand why, right? This was all way too complicated for me. But when I woke up again, Annabeth was standing by the bed, and I found, with a bit of difficulty on the first few tries, that I could move again. Then I saw her. If it didn't get to my head that this was real when Chiron said it, it did now. She didn't look a day over sixteen, and she was practically growling at me.

''Listen, you,'' she started, and already I was scared. If you've known her as long as I have, you know that means a rant is on the way.

"I can't go to work anymore, because I look like a child. You won't be able to teach! All because I had to get dropped by that stupid little beast, and into that disgusting blood!" She looked clean, all things considering. I felt clean, which meant that I probably got washed off pretty well after the fight. This would be an interesting story to tell to the kids, anyway- Right...They were kids...And so am I...Interesting.

I rolled out of the bed, marveling at how my clothes still fit relatively well. I looked out of place in a button down shirt and slacks, but I wasn't swimming in clothes, which at least let me know I was old and in shape. Which, again, wasn't a problem anymore, because I was a kid again.

"Do you have any clothes I can change into, Wise Girl?" I asked, stressing the 'girl' as much as possible. That was what did it. I could already see the flames in her eyes. Yeah, I ran out of there like a maniac, but it was justified. I don't want to be on the receiving end of the worst thrashing I've had in years.

If you ever think having kids is a good idea, then you're right. Since Jason is basically my clone at that age (Which is my age, right now), he had clothes that fit. What I did not realize is that my son has the most odd musical tastes for a teenager, which, while fine, seeing as I like some of the stuff too, but not fine when all he has packed are jeans and tee-shirts for garage bands he likes, and tee-shirts for older bands that are so vile I couldn't stand to wear them (For example, one happened to read 'we're the best, so...the rest. Fill in the blank). Not a single Camp shirt. Maybe I'd have to hit up Chiron. In the mean time, though, I was presentable, with jeans and a white short sleeve shirt he typically sleeps in, and was headed out of the Poseidon cabin to get some dinner after the long day, most of which I spent unconscious.

A/N

Right...Yes, again, it's weird, but please stick with me. It will tie in once I introduce the problem, and once again, I apologize for the wait. With winter break starting in a day or so, I'll be able to post a chapter or two, ideally, but I don't want to jinx it. This was going to be one mega-chapter (about 3000 words) but I posted the first half as soon as I was done with it so at least something is out there for the story.