Previously - "Fine Minerva, I'll do it. I'll marry Hermione Granger.".

---x---

Snape pinched his large nose as Minerva wrapped her small body around his masculine one in an embrace containing both pity and sorrow. Severus sighed.

"Where is the bloody form Minerva?" he asked angered by the pity he saw. Some odd reaction occurred in his head. He didn't need this pity. He could get through this piece of cake. How hard could it be to take care of a girl he had be rescuing since she was eleven? Severus looked at the woman impatiently.

"I left the form in my office with Miss Granger." Minerva said and began walking in the direction of the aforementioned location. Severus just cocked an eyebrow, as if questioning her competence for not grabbing a very important paper in such a flurry. Minerva rolled her eyes to herself when she noticed his expression and walked forward primly.

The duo entered Minerva's office to find Hermione huddled up in a ball on the couch, recounting the activities of today. She seemed disbelieving at the fact that she had to get married at the age of eighteen to her snaky son of a bitch potions professor. Hermione looked at the two professors as they entered and sheepishly returned to a proper sitting position. She shot a questioning look at Minerva, who nodded grimly.

Meanwhile, Severus had taken a seat at her desk and was filling out the required information to officially send an owl.

"I _____ hereby official petition for the hand of ______ in matrimony under decree 34.876"

Severus signed in his usual spiky scrawl and Hermione watched as he summoned an owl to come and take the letter to the ministry. A handsome barn owl flew into the room. He wasn't the traditional white and brown and Hermione had to do a double take. He was an elegant looking black owl. Figures. There were probably like four black owls in the world and Snape would hunt one down, not daring to stray from his seemingly favorite color.

Severus tied the envelope to he bird's leg and watched as it flew out through the window. Now they had about thirty minutes to wait until Hermione got her letter of notification and sign that. Then they would have the next three months to plan a wedding. It was October twenty third, giving them until January twenty third to seal the deal.

While waiting for the letter Hermione just stared at Severus. She observed the harsh angles of his aristocratic roman face and wondered if it would look the same way in fifty years. In a hundred? Hermione sighed. Mental, or verbal for that matter, whining was of no use right now. Snape would hardly be one to pity her and Minerva had slipped out of the office, giving them time to talk. What a wonderful conversation they were having!

At this moment Hermione started second-guessing it. They hadn't even asked her if she wanted to do this! She was expected to sign that form but she didn't have to. Thinking about it though, she didn't really have many other options. Hermione glared at him. She had practically no choice but to marry him. Damn his intelligence and strength. That is why she needed this snake of a man.

Severus noticed her glare and up went that eyebrow. Hermione mimicked his expression but he didn't seem amused. He decided he would have to man up and looked at her.

"When do you want the nuptials to take place?" Hermione mentally snorted. He wouldn't even call it a wedding. At that thought, Hermione wondered what it would be like? A short ministry ceremony? A party? Hermione didn't want to pressure Snape into a large wedding but no little girl dreams of getting married in the white walls of the ministry. Of course, Hermione never dreamed it would be Snape she would be wedding either.

"Well, we have until January and depending on what kind of ceremony we have, I'll plan around that." Hermione said. Waiting for him to tell her that they would be in the ministry of magic on the twenty third of January so they could postpone it as long as possible.

"I haven't a care. You make all the arrangements and I'll show up." His deep voice answered her unasked question. Hermione graced him with a small smile then frowned again. Severus looked at her questioningly but figured that it must be her disappointment in the man that she would marry.

"I…how…how are we going to pay for this?" Hermione asked cautiously. She had about 20 galleons to her name, which was about one hundred pounds. Hermione wouldn't even be able to buy a decent wedding dress with her savings. It was in that moment that she considered a ministry marriage.

Severus chuckled. Hermione was startled. She looked down at herself, checking for stains or wardrobe malfunctions but came up from her observances with a blank look on her face. Severus just picked up his ebony wand and cast a silent summoning spell. In flew a folded little note. He casually handed it to Hermione.

It was a bank statement. When Hermione read the amount on the paper her mahogany eyes widened and an inaudible gasp left her lips. Severus deftly grabbed the statement and placed it in some hidden pocket above his breast in his raven colored robes.

With a nod and whisper Hermione murmured "That takes care of that then" her eyes still wide. Severus almost made the comment 'if that's all it takes you to shut up I would have tried it years ago' but decided that already messing with his young wife-to-be would be considered bad form.

"So…" Hermione started hesitantly "You don't care if we have an actual wedding?" Hermione asked shyly. She didn't want to anger him and get berated for something stupid like her incessant pushing or something of the sort.

"No." he said plainly. No elaboration. Just no. Hermione took that as consent and then made a mental note to go research wizarding weddings in the library when her life got sorted out. It would be a while, but sometime before the wedding plans needed to be made, obviously.

"When do you want it?" this time he just referred to their bonding as 'it'. That was yet another faux pas that would not be tolerated by any other fiance than Snape. Hermione thought. The most convenient time for all of her friends to make it out would most likely be during the holidays. Hermione said as much and Snape murmured his consent.

The sat in silence for a few moments, both observing each other (Snape was doing so a little less out right but still, he was taking notes). Hermione jumped when a loud scratch assaulted the window. Severus, however, had heard the flapping wings of the bird and was already standing when Hermione got startled. There was something comedic over the fact that the girl would scare over a bird but was going to marry the big bad bat of the dungeons.

Severus patted the owl and fed him one of the owl treats that Minerva kept on her desk. He muttered "Thank you Mercury" and handed the scroll to Hermione along with a feather quill. Hermione smiled at the name. Of course he would chose the name of his owl to be that of the messenger of the gods. Severus definitely wasn't very original when it came to names.

Something in that reassured Hermione and she lost the slight feeling that she could end up with a child named Ragnarok…of course, it was also a name from mythology. Hermione shuddered at that thought, an action not missed by Severus, and sat down in the seat that had been occupied previously by Severus.

"Miss Hermione Granger,

You have received an official petition for your hand from Severus Snape. You have a week to accept this or another petition.

Congratulations on your upcoming nuptials!

Bradworth Wellington,

Ministry of Magic"

Hermione looked at the paper then grabbed the stiff one behind and signed her agreement to be married to Severus Snape through the terms of the law. She looked into his black eyes and tears started to form. When did her life get so screwed up? Oh yeah, when she moved to Hogwarts. Severus turned around, giving her a little privacy so he wouldn't be staring her down as she wept.

Hermione tried to stop the tears and was successful after five minutes. Severus turned to her as the sniffles ceased.

"Are you hungry?" he asked after casting a tempus charm, seeing that lunch was already over. Hermione let a bashful nod and he held open the door for his fiance for the first time. Hermione felt oddly taken care of when he displayed these manners and for a moment she thought it would be okay. She wanted to be mature about and she wanted to have faith in Snape, she truly did, but no matter how rational her mind was, she still shied at the thought of spending all of her life alongside this dark wizard.

The couple walked down to the kitchens to get some lunch. They both knew they could have summoned a house elf but they felt like moving and didn't want to sit in McGonagall's dreary office so they left. Severus took Hermione into the kitchen where many sounds of pots and pans scraping against surfaces could be heard and the high-pitched squeaking of the house-elves resonated through the room.

"Mitsy can help you Master Snape?" the house elf asked. Hermione could tell the elf feared something. The elf was worried she had missed some signal of her master summoning her. Severus just looked at her with no expression. Not friendliness, but also not a condescending look that most house elves were accustomed to. Just blank.

"Can you get Miss Granger and I some lunch please?" he said. Hermione looked at him for a long moment, gauging the awkwardness of her next comment before it slipped out.

"We are going to be married." Hermione said, her voice sounding a little distant. "How astute an observation of yours Miss Granger" Snape said mocking her. He really couldn't resist. She practically asked for it. Hermione resisted the temptation to stick her tongue out at him and continued.

"We are going to be married. You should call my by my name." She said. Her voice sounded devoid of emotion, almost as much as Snape's did.

"Your name is Miss Granger" He countered. Not ready to call her Hermione. It was just wrong. She was still a student….with that mindset, Severus didn't know how in the world he was going to be able to sleep with her, if he couldn't bear to call her by her first name.

"It will be Madame Snape in a few months." she said irritated, her voice raising just a fraction. Severus cocked an eyebrow as he was known to do far too often.

"Whatever you wish" he said "Hermione" he purred her name out. He was trying to make it sound sinister but any witch with ears would agree that it sounded more sensual than anything. Hermione flushed a bright red and looked at her feet. She decided that now would be an interesting time to act on that famous Gryffindor courage.

"Glad you agree" she said then mirrored his expression with a cocked eyebrow herself "Severus". Both of them snapped out of it as Mitsy returned with a heaping tray of food enough to feed four sumo wrestlers. The little elf floated the tray over to a small table set up in the closest corner of the kitchen for occasions such as these and plates and silver ware appeared.

They both turned from each other and headed towards the table. It was incredibly awkward. Severus' mind just kept shouting "STUDENT STUDENT SHOULD NOT BE DINING WITH YOUR STUDENT". Hermione's mind just seemed to be repeated "your life is over" Hermione's thoughts were a lot quieter as she had given up hope for any semblance of a life.

After their impromptu meal was completed to the best of their ability, Severus stood, eyeing her. "I have classes to attend to…" he trailed off a moment. "If you desire, I will write you an exemption pass" his voice was gruff and slightly embarrassed.

Hermione looked at him with wonder in her eyes. It was confusing. This man had probably never done it anyway so it would obviously looked forged to any recipients. Hermione wondered why he would offer when he detested the absence of a minute of learning and expressed as much.

"I take care of what is mine." He said simply. Apparently letting her miss class was taking care of her. Hermione blushed. Legally she was his. Simple as that. She seriously mentally debated but her know-it-all self took over and she responded with a "that won't be necessary but thanks".

Hermione was surprised at his act of possessiveness. For someone that absolutely detested the situation, he was making Hermione feel awfully safe. Hermione wondered what was wrong with Severus. Quite frankly, so did Severus. When his mind thought of that comment, it was meant to reassure her that he would take care of her, but he wondered if it was taking it one step too far. What was he thinking? In just two months' time he would be shagging this girl.

He mentally cringed at the thought. Marriage license or not, consent or not, this would never be okay. He was not supposed to be even friends with one of his students, fucking her was going a little too far. Or a lot.

It was with thoughts of self-disgust and a general hatred for the whole situation, that he opened the door and let Miss Granger…erm, Hermione through the door and parted ways with her as she went up to History of Magic and he went back down to the dungeons to prepare for his next class.

How could a man go from peacefully teaching his class, to being engaged, to teaching the class in the very same day. Only a few hours' time had elapsed since the damn ministry owls had interrupted his class, but it felt like days. Severus cursed to himself. This was going to be a long life if time proceeded the way it had today.

--x--

The next morning Hermione awoke, stretching in a very feline like manner and yawning peacefully. She then let out a wail as the memories from the previous day came crashing through her head. Hermione cast a tempus and saw she had an hour to get ready for classes. Then she realized that yesterday was Friday and she had no school obligations today.

Hermione rolled over in bed but could not find rest even though she had gotten virtually none during the night. She groaned. She for once in her life, had not had a dream in her sleep. She fell into slumber and it felt like the second she hit the pillow she was awake again. Hermione rose from her bed and went about her morning routine to get ready to go to Hogsmeade with Harry and possibly Draco if he showed up. As Hermione was doing this, she went through a list of all of the male order members if her head to see if there would have been another possible option, even though it was moot point now.

Deadalus Diggle - Half-Blood

Elphias Doge - Too old to be subject to the law

Aberforth Dumbledore - Too old

Mundungus Fletcher - Not trustworthy / halfblood

Rubeus Hagrid - Half-giant, not subject to law

Remus Lupin - Not subject to law

Alastor Moody - Halfblood

Sturgis Podmore - In Azkaban

Kingsley Shacklebolt - Halfblood

Severus Snape - Eligible

Arthur Weasley - Married

Bill Weasley - Married

Charlie Weasley - Engaged

George Weasley - Engaged

The reality hit her that Snape was the only eligible man.

Hermione looked grim as she exited her quarters. She set out to find the great hall to get some food as she was incredibly hungry. Hermione walked quietly and slowly on her way through the halls in Hogwarts. She greeted Sir Nicholas in a melancholy fashion, leaving him worried in her wake, then finally came to the dining hall.

Hermione looked around. It was too early for most students to be up, so Hermione had the place mostly to herself aside from about seven other students and one teacher. The one teacher she really didn't care to see right now. Hermione fought the urge to turn around and walk away and just sat down with a doomed expression painted across her features. One that Snape mirrored in his features.

Just as Hermione picked up a piece of toast adorned with jelly a very flustered Harry came bursting into the room. Hermione looked shocked. Harry smiled weakly and embraced her fiercely.

"Hermione I'm so sorry I had to leave you. What happened? Are you okay?" He spoke all on one breath and Hermione motioned for him to sit down.

"Take a big drink Harry" Hermione said, somehow that always seemed to calm down Harry. After Harry had hesitantly followed her orders Hermione spoke again. "I got petitions for very dangerous men. Previous death eaters." Harry grimaced but Hermione ignored the expression and continued on with her tale. "These men will kill me if I marry them, and may still try if I do not" Hermione left out that the reason was to get revenge on Harry "I have to marry a man who can help protect me from them." Hermione spit out the word protect and it was clear that she thought she could take care of herself. Harry nodded impatiently.

"I know all of this Hermione." he said in a small voice and gave her an encouraging hug from the seat beside her.

"I have to marry…" Hermione trailed off, willing the words to come out of her mouth. "I have too…" she tried once more "Oh! I can't do this!" She said crying and ran out of the great hall in tears. Harry sat there thinking 'this must be bad'

Snape, who had witnessed the whole exchange lazily got up, not excited to have to go deal with a crying hormonal teenager. He walked through the door that Hermione had taken rather than the one the teachers used. Harry, ever observant since the war, had noticed this. Slowly the puzzle began to piece itself together.

"Oh Shit" he said, shell shocked.

You may have noticed I dropped the f-bomb. I don't normally but I think that when the character's really get screwed up, more vulgar language helps set the mood for what's going through their minds. Please bear with me. *makes angel face*

Questioning my black owl? Silly reader! Check out this link! It even says it is from the UK. Lets just say that Snape got a hold of this pretty birdy with that crazy ass Snape fortune - .