A/N: one little tidbit, Tony isn't playing her, he truly does love as we all see. He didn't mean for that night to happen but it did and he kinda deals with that in this chapter because he didn't mean to go down the road this way. Btw, thanks for all the reviews and alerts, you guys rock!

Tony awoke the next morning to his alarm and a headache. He had had worse but it was just annoying. Then memories of the previous night came rushing back. He sat up too quickly and his headache got worse for a few seconds. Once he recovered, he looked around finding an empty bed and no clothes on the floor but his own.

He got up and pulled on his boxers. He went out to the living room to find empty beer bottles and an empty bowl. Evidence that last night's activities had in fact taken place. He felt terrible about sleeping with her like that. He didn't have a plan yet but he knew that sleeping with her sure wasn't it. It was the last thing that he wanted to do but maybe this could be the start of a relationship for them. Not a relationship just about sex but a real relationship. Not to mention that he still had to help her, and that was going to be pretty difficult now if things were awkward.

He took a quick shower and got ready for work. His head and his heart were fighting the entire way to the Navy yard. He hoped that Ziva wouldn't pretend like it never happened but then again he hoped that she didn't acknowledge that it happened by ignoring him. When he came in, his fears of the latter were confirmed.

She was already at her desk, checking email, he supposed. She refused to look at him.

"Morning McGee." Tony grunted as he dropped his bag in its usual place.

"good morning Tony." McGee said cheerfully. "what's your problem this morning?"

"none of your McBusiness." Tony said shortly. He hated talking to Tim that way but he had to lash out somehow. Unfortunately one if his best friends was the target.

He sat down and logged onto his computer only to IM her.

VerySpecialAgentDiNozzo: can we talk about last night?

NinjaZiva: there is nothing to talk about. What happened, happened. We move on.

VerySpecialAgentDiNozzo: I don't want to move on, Ziva.

He looked directly at her as he typed. He saw her read the message and she looked up at him. Tony's eyes pleaded. He heard a bing notifying him of an IM.

NinjaZiva is offline

He sighed and rubbed his face.

"DiNozzo!" he heard Vance call from the catwalk. "with me." Tony got up and met Vance at the foot of the stairs only to follow him to his office.

When they arrived, Tony walked in to see the SecNav.

"well don't look all excited Special Agent DiNozzo." secnav said.

'well seeing as how you're blackmailing me...' Tony mused to himself.

"you needed to see me?" Tony asked getting straight to the point.

"yes, I'm having second thoughts about your assignment." he said.

"why?" Tony asked.

"you seemed too...involved, as it is." he said.

"I've already started working on it." Tony said.

"really?" The Secnav sat up a little straighter. "how's that going."

"starting out a litle rocky but I think everything will straighten itself out." Tony said. 'more like 1 step forward, 2 steps back.' he thought.

"good to hear it." secnav smiled. "I guess I'll let you continue then, but remember, your job rides on this." he said turning serious again. "you're dismissed."

Vance nodded to Tony on his way out. He walked back to his desk only to find that the bullpen was empty. Tony sat down and put his head in his hands. He was a coward, but then again, he was trying to help Ziva. He was a puppet. A powerless, lowely puppet that the Secnav pulled the strings to. When did Anthony DiNozzo fall so far? "When he fell in love." a little voice in the back of his head chimed in. "He just now hit the ground." He knew for a long time that he had feelings for Ziva but she was always off limits or just out of reach.

And what the hell was last night? He wanted to replay everything over in his mind again, and again but his heart wouldn't let him because it hurt too much to know that it was probably the first and last time that happened.

He was broken from his reverie when he saw Ziva exit the bathroom and beeline for the elevator.

It was now or never. With all thoughts of his assignment gone from his mind, Tony sprang up and got to the elevator just before the doors closed. He slipped in and hit the emergency stop button soon after the elevator started moving.

"Ziva we need to talk." He said.

"you need to talk. I have nothing to say." she replied.

"ok, then I'll talk, you listen." he paused and thought about his words. He decided to just speak from the heart.

Ziva was in the opposite corner that he was in, refusing to make eye contact.

"last night, I've wanted last night to happen for I don't know how long. And now that it has, I want to pursue this."

"pursue what Tony?" she asked exasperatingly. "friends with benefits?"

"no. You know like you and me. Us. As a couple. Date, get married, have a few kids, grow..." he was silenced by Ziva's finger on his lips. She had sprung across the elevator faster than lightning.

"Tony, we, can't." she emphasized.

"why not?" he asked, determinedly against her finger.

"we just..." she trailed off exasperatedly and removing her finger.

"exactly." Tony said with a soft smile. "I love you Ziva. I think I always have. I've always come for you, I've always been there to help you for a reason and not just because you're my partner. You're more than that to me."

Ziva looked at the floor.

"one of the most permanent things in my life, has always been you." Tony continued. "and I think that...we've danced around...this, for a long enough time now. I want to pursue this. I want a life with you Ziva."

Ziva didn't know what to say. She was afraid, afraid of getting hurt, to let someone back into her already broken heart. But Tony was always there for her. He was always trying to help her, or at least not intentionally hurt her.

"I think this is right Ziva." he said, silently begging for her to look at him. "I want this to be right."

Tony's hand rose to cup her cheek while his other hand went to her waist. He gently pulled her towards him and she let him. They didn't break eye contact as he leant in to where their noses were almost touching.

Ziva hadn't tried to stop him so he closed the space between their lips. Tony's tongue entered her mouth hesitantly but she kissed him back.

Tony pulled away, slightly breathless, and rested his forehead against hers.

"tell me that you feel what I do when we do that." he whispered.

"yes." she whispered back.

With that, she resealed her lips to his.

They broke apart after a few minutes.

"I wonder if Vance ever put those cameras in here." Tony smiled cheekily.

"should we give him a show?" Ziva asked seductively.

"ha...haha..." Tony laughed uneasily.

Ziva smiled and kissed him more aggressively. She started undoing his belt. She pushed him against the wall with the control panel and secretly flipped the on switch.

Tony was so into the kiss that he didn't even notice. The doors opened and Ziva was gone.

"tease!" he called after her. He looked down and realised that he needed to go take a cold shower. He laughed. He felt the happiest that he had ever been in his entire life. He tried not to let the knot in his stomach and the voice in the back of his head bring him down.

That evening, Tony went home with a smile on his face. He showered and changed into some sweats before grabbing a couple of movies. On his way to Ziva's, he stopped and got a pizza and some beer.

He walked up the stairs to her apartment and knocked. He smiled into the peep hole.

Ziva walked to her door and looked into the peep hole only to find Tony looking ridiculous. She laughed and opened the door.

"can I come in?" Tony asked still grinning from ear to ear.

"maybe, it depends on what kind of pizza you brought." she smiled mischeviously.

"5 cheese supreme." he smiled. "your favorite."

"alright." she laughed and let him in.

"so what have you been up to?" Tony asked as he sat down on her couch.

She sat down by him and tucked her legs underneath her body.

"well, my lease is up on this place in a couple of weeks and I'm thinking about moving closer to the Navy Yard so I have been looking at new apartments." she said as Tony handed her a slice of pizza. She pulled her laptop onto her lap from the coffee table and returned to her real estate browsing.

"my place is only a few miles." Tony said. "it's an easy drive."

"that's something that I would like." Ziva said. "but I can't find much in my price range." she didn't look up from her computer, nor did she realize exactly what he was saying.

"plus my place is considerably closer to...me." he said and took a large bite of pizza.

Ziva looked over to see him struggling with a particularly large cheese strand between his mouth and his pizza.

She laughed and grabbed the strand and put it in her mouth.

"hey, you just took like half of the cheese off of my pizza." he pouted.

"you'll live." she smirked and sucked the sauce off of her finger.

"yeah, sooo...uh my place is pretty ideal." he said with a nervous smile.

"Tony." she sighed but smiled at the same time. "we just figured out...our feelings. We're not even together."

"we're not?" Tony's eyebrows shot up.

"well..."

"come on Ziva, we've known eachother for years. There's nothing you don't know about me and I don't think...that there's anything that I don't know about you." Tony said slowly. "do you really think that we can...date? It's too normal...nothing about us is normal."

"you have a point." she said. "I am just..." she looked back down at her computer.

Tony's world stopped. He wanted to carve out his heart and give it to her at that moment but he knew even if that were possible, he could possibly be hurting her. He didn't know how this operation was going to end but he hoped that Ziva really wouldn't be involved. He had half a mind just to tell her now, but then again maybe he could solve this and she would never have to know. Her life had been hard enough, why complicate it further?

"Ziva, I will never, intentionally hurt you. I've loved you for years, all of the things that have happened, I've tried to protect you." Tony said. "I have your back, because I know that you have mine."

She looked up with a small smile played out on her lips.

"can't we just skip the 'go on a date every few days and talk on the phone every day'" Tony asked.

Ziva thought for a moment. "if, when my lease runs out, we are still together..."

"which we will be." he added.

"if," she continued. "then I will move in with you."

Tony was ecstatic. He kissed her lips and went for another slice of pizza.

Ziva laughed.

"so what movies did you bring?" she asked him.

"Bond, James Bond." he said in his best Sean Connery impression voice.

Ziva laughed and Tony couldn't help but smile and laugh with her. He put the DVD in and sat back down. He leaned back and slightly to the side and Ziva laid on him, with one hand on his stomach and one of his around her shoulders.

Tony kissed the top of her head before he let exhaustion take him over and he laid his head back against the couch.

He was one happy man.

A/N: little bit of fluff before I turn this little world upside down :) Review!