The Rainbow After
Antonio Fernandez Carriedo is the kind of person who would follow what his dreams were. He walked the path that his heart tells him so. Despite the opposition around him before the transfer to London, the Spanish man didn't let it get to him. Emerald eyes filled with determination and passion pushed through; his was promoted as the assistant manager of the marketing department of the London branch.
Antonio was working for an international magazine that had publishing houses across the world. Time had passed and many events, both good and bad, had occurred to the man.
Currently, he was slumped on the bar's counter. Curly brown locks were hiding most of his facial countenance and his mouth that murmured something incomprehensible once in a while.
On the man's hand was a mug clasped firmly by the handle with his fingers. For a brief moment, Antonio felt relief while chugging down the beer that had been poured down in the mug some time ago. By now, it was already the fifth or sixth one. Antonio could not recall; he lost count after the third mug.
During the past days, beers along with anxieties were like shadows to the Spaniard; the two were stuck to him, making them inseparable companions.
Antonio didn't ask for anymore refill. Instead he left several bills and some coin on the counter-top then left the place.
The travel from the bar to his home was fortunately uneventful despite the nauseating feeling that was bubbling inside the Spaniard. Once he was inside the house, he slide down the front door and was hunched.
'My…'
Antonio felt all the energy in his body leave. His limbs were starting to go numb; it seemed like the blood vessels ceased their supply of the precious red liquid. Before passing out, Antonio was grateful that the following day was a Saturday which meant no work.
'…God, how did I… why did I turn like this?'
Several months later, after the destructive and deceptive lifestyle, Antonio Fernandez Carriedo was finally able to bounce back to his optimistic self. This time around, he was finally able to climb up from the bottom of the pit.
'Fifteen, sixteen or seventeen months…?'
The rejection that had tasted bitter on his tongue had receded. It was water under the bridge. When Antonio and Lovino Vargas encountered each other in the lobby or cafeteria, the former was able to give casual greetings. The Italian also replied with the same casualness or most of the time, indifference.
When the season had changed from spring to summer, the different departments decided on an outing. This time around, it was considered as mandatory. According to the HR head, the outing was meant as an acquaintance party of the sorts since compared to the previous years, there were more interns and new employees.
Later that day, the HR posted the groupings on the different bulletin boards of each department for the outing. The members of a group were a mix of the different members of the different departments.
Antonio searched for his name and his eyes dilated in surprise when he found his name; what shocked him was that he belonged to the same group as Lovino Vargas.
'…'
The Spaniard was unable to find words to convey what he was feeling. Rather, he was not able to find out what he was feeling. It felt like, it was like…
'No, don't get your hopes up.'
Yes, hopeful. That was the word. However, mentally, he had kicked himself because he didn't want to crash down, again. It was a horrid experience and it wasn't something that he wanted to relish over and over again.
'But…'
Antonio steeled his resolve. He was not completely over Lovino Vargas; but, he didn't want to be compromised once again with his feelings.
On the day of the event, the venue was filled with newly arrived individuals wearing their favorite beach wear. There were those who were subtly flaunting out their clothes. Antonio inwardly laughed. It had been quite some time since he had been in such a large crowd.
After greeting the people he knew, the Spaniard then searched for the cottage that he was assigned to. The search was a little long since the abode was near the edge of the resort, a little further than where most of the action was taking place.
By the time he had arrived at the cottage, the place was devoid of anyone. It seemed that the other occupants of the place had not yet arrived.
"I wonder…" Antonio murmured and then out of the blue, someone from his back has cussed loudly, enough for anyone in a ten-meter radius to hear it.
"BASTARD!"
A little hesitant but Antonio turned his back and saw the fiery hazel eyes that were bewildered. The duffel bag that he was carrying fell on the wooden floor.
"Hi Lovi!" The Spaniard grinned.
Lovino, who had apparently recovered from the shock, took his duffel bag and returned a curt greeting. "Hello."
After the punctured greeting, the Italian had pushed aside the Spaniard and headed to one of the bedrooms in the cottage.
Antonio had sighed at the awkwardness that was between him and the Italian. To divert his attention, he surveyed the small place.
There were only three bedrooms in the said place. Inside each bedroom contained two distinct cabinets and two single beds. There was a single fluorescent lamp as well as a wall fan for the amenities of the occupants. The bathroom and comfort room was for communal use within the cottage. There was no kitchen inside the place. According to the house policy, eating inside the cottage was strictly prohibited. It should be done on the veranda.
It was an odd policy considering that the place was a beach resort. However, Antonio had shrugged after reading it and went to one of the unoccupied rooms. To his surprise, the other rooms were already filled. There were bags on top of the beds.
'This means that…'
In an odd turn of events, Antonio Fernandez Carriedo and Lovino Vargas were sharing a room together.
By ten o'clock of that same day, everyone was gathered at the center of the resort. The program organized by the HR department was starting.
"No gadgets for the duration of the activities are allowed. Please turn off whatever gadget you have and leave it in your cottages. Anyone who does not follow will have a prohibition to join the current activity. After three prohibitions, that person will face a punishment." The HR head said, a Swiss man by the name of Vash Zwingli. Despite the domineering attitude of the man, he was well-respected inside the company for various reasons.
Ten minutes later, when everyone had only the bare necessities with them, the assistant head of began the program proper.
After the formalities, the employees had formed into small groups according to what had been posted earlier that week. The first activity was simple: cook for lunch. The viand depended on what the team leader had picked up. The challenge was searching for the ingredients which had been scattered around the resort. There were clues to where a particular ingredient was located. To add up to the challenge, the time limit is only two hours and the method of cooking is through wood.
"Shit happens." Lovino quietly murmured as he had taken a small paper containing their viand.
"What does it say?" Antonio asked.
"Ratatouille." The Italian replied with little contempt but he ended up sighing.
Just as instructed, every time had done their utmost best to meet the requirements that were imposed on them.
Some minutes past twelve noon, the HR team had halted the activity and judges came to take a taste to each of the food that was prepared and presented by the different teams.
The point of the activity, although the HR did not bother yet to give an explanation until later, was to build rapport within the team. Between Antonio and Lovino, it had proven to be effective. The awkwardness between the two individuals had subsided in contrast to the days before.
As the day went by, their broken relationship was starting to get mended.
Before dinner, it was "free time," everyone was able to do what they wanted to do.
The Spaniard took this opportunity to talk with Lovino. The rolling of the waves rang heavily into the ears of Antonio as he walked nearer to the Italian who was sitting a few meters away from the sea. As Antonio had noted, Lovino was staring absentmindedly into the horizon. It looked like he was contemplating about something or perhaps not.
"What is it bastard?"
These words immediately overrode the previous sound of the waves into the auditory system of Antonio. The Spaniard could only smile at how he was called.
"I was just looking for you since dinner will be soon." Antonio said. His words were carefully chosen.
"Yeah, whatever." The Italian spat every word he said and rolled his hazel eyes.
Antonio let out a breath and he sat beside Lovino. The man waited for any verbal attacks but none came his way. He took it as a sign that something was off.
"Are you alright?" The Spaniard asked, worry coating each word.
"Huh? Of course I am." The Italian gave an indifferent reply.
"Well, you seem… out of it."
"It's none of your business."
The verbal exchange between the two stopped at the last word of Lovino. However, Antonio refused to accept that it would end there. The man then initiated another conversation which resulted to a throw of angry words contrasting the concerned ones.
"You know Lovi, if, if you talk things out, it would be better."
"I don't want to hear that shit. Just leave me alone."
"No."
"Why?"
"Because… because… I care for you."
"Yeah, right."
"I really do!"
This time, it was Antonio who had caused for their conversation to end, in a rather awkward situation.
"That's-" The Italian man was about to say something but he had cut himself off. Lovino had then stood up and he faced the Spaniard.
Despite the many months that had passed by for Antonio to get over his feelings for Lovino Vargas, there was still a small fire that waited to be kindled inside of him. The paradox of him emotional state was once again coming back.
The conversation between the two individuals was cut-off when they heard a yelling from afar.
"DINNER IS READY!"
Hours later, before the clock struck midnight, only a few employees had gone to sleep. Most have remained awake, socializing, frolicking and what-not with their fellow employees. Although Antonio would have been inclined to join in with the other employees, he had stayed behind at the cottage along with Lovino Vargas who was sitting on one of the wooden benches of the veranda. Beside the Italian was a bottle of tequila and a shot glass.
"Bastard."
"Hi Lovi. How are you?"
"… Fine." There was pure sarcasm in the voice of the Italian which didn't go unnoticed by the Spaniard.
"Why?"
"What why?"
"Why do you hide what it is that is making you down?"
"Didn't I say earlier to fuck off?"
"Well, I don't want to leave you."
"Why? Just leave! Leave. Me. Alone!"
"No matter what you say, I will not. I care for you. Regardless of what you think, I consider you my friend and this is what friends do."
"Friends, huh? What a convenient word when you want to end something."
"End…" Something clicked inside the mind of Antonio. Despite the furious words that were thrown at him, it didn't deter him from going close to Lovino. It didn't deter him before, so it wouldn't deter him now. "Did you…"
"Fuck yes, we broke up. Happy?"
"No, not."
This is a chance, as much as Antonio would love to think it as such but he was unable to do so. Seeing in person the current state of Lovino, it hurt too much for Antonio. The Spaniard watched Lovino was standing up from where he was.
"Would you want to talk it out?"
"No but thanks. And sorry for lashing." The Italian shrugged and brought with him the bottle and shot glass. Lovino then walked inside the house but before he got past the door, his legs gave out and he laid down on the floor.
Antonio immediately rushed to him and helped the other man get to his bed.
"Hey Antonio, is this what a heartbreak is like? It fucking hurts. I don't like it."
Antonio was bewildered at the change of attitude and atmosphere of Lovino. The alcohol that was rushing inside the Italian's system was causing the change.
"Things will get better Lovi. Someday, things will get better."
The following day, everyone was packing up by noon time. Meanwhile, inside the cottage that Antonio was staying at, Lovino Vargas was cussing more than the usual.
"Shit, I have a splitting headache." Antonio slightly chuckled at how Lovino had word out his frustration. This had only earned the Spaniard a glare from the said man.
"You did drain down more than half of the bottle by yourself."
"Shut up!"
Several weeks have passed since the party at the resort. The relationship of Antonio Fernandez Carriedo and Lovino Vargas were smoothing out. The two individuals began to eat meals together outside of the office perimeters and saw each other more often.
For Antonio, perhaps all those suffering were a trial to test whether he could truly wait for Lovino Vargas. The Spaniard wanted to believe in it strongly.
The good days for Antonio were starting. One step per day, he would get closer and closer to Lovino. A day will surely arrive that they would reach the point where their feelings would become mutual.
"You are you, and I am I and if by chance we find each other, it's beautiful."
"We did find each other and it's truly beautiful."
END.
A/N: The second to the last sentence was from "Gestalt Prayer" by Fritz Perls.
This is the whole text:
I do my thing and you do your thing.
I am not in this world to live up to your expectations,
And you are not in this world to live up to mine.
You are you, and I am I,
and if by chance we find each other, it's beautiful.
If not, it can't be helped.
(Fritz Perls, "Gestalt Therapy Verbatim", 1969)
So, to everyone who reviewed, favorite, alert this story (and by extension to me) my heartfelt gratitude! So, the winning choice of the poll was for the two (Antonio and Lovino) to end up together.