Her breath was coming in little puffs, but it was slowing down. The blush stayed in her cheeks. She started to push the book away and stand up.
Wobbly, cold legs, tingling with inactivity and the pinch of the edge of her seat on the backside of her ridged knees.
She opted instead to sit completely still, hands in her lap, bangs in her face.
The book stayed open on the page, its spine cracked from having been folded over on this very page. It was clearly well read.
Shizuku was dizzied again knowing that he, got off to this page alot.
He got off to this. A lot.
The springs in the vending machine groaned, not wanting to give her the last can of green tea. She glared at her pink reflection, she was going to get bad marks on her tests if she couldn't study.
She did not see the vending machine three rows over that offered 'XXX girls, DD girls, and much more' She didn't see the flashy neon blinking 'relax, relax, relax'.
Someone had left a bananna peel on the ground she discovered, as the pavemebt rushed up to greet her. The last thing she wanted was to be on the ground in front of the adult vending machine.
She looked up at it for a split second, and the censored bodies of large breasted women loomed over her, writhing in pleasure on the covers of little white magazines. Small enough to fit in your pocket.
These women wanted sex. They didn't have to be coerced into it like the passive woman in the novel she carried. But she didn't see the appeal of this flashy pornography any more than the subdued build up.
It was all just distractions. She needed to study, but the library was not sonewhere she'd like to be. She'd try to study at home.
On her bed, her notebook and chemistry book in front of her, the chemical formulas kept trying to look like jumbles of letters and numbers, but she straightened them out into cohesive bonds.
She smoothed her hands over the page earasing a stray electron from one side and then added it onto the other. Now it made sense. This made sense, she smiled at her work briefly.
The next formula was longer and had a train of electrons and extra bits to sort through. She leaned over the page settling into a rhythm, when a book slid out of her bag and bumped into her foot.
It was the novel. And with new eyes she could see the gap in the middle where Haru always had it folded over. The lump in her throat was dry. She never did get that green tea.
She'd go out and get something. Food, drink, anything. But as she got out of bed, her weight shifted the novel all the way out of her bag. It now sat in the middle of her bed. It's glossy cover making the mans intense eyes shine at her.
She whimpered at it. And she picked it up. Jittery and hot, she sat with it in bed, letting it glide open to a certain page.
The man was intense, the woman quivered. Things were described as warm and slick, tight and thick.
It used phrases like, "His throbbing member, and "her dripping warmth".
It was "slowly caressing her womanhood" and "licking at where her hips met". It, "lapped up her love juices".
She sputtered closing the book. It was so...incomplete. The thrill was coated in molasses. She squirmed.
It was so stupid.
Looking down at the novel, and turning it over. She read the back cover. And there was a snippet there too. "Her coming of age, and of other things..." It was trying to imply, but it was too sugar coated.
She was not thinking about about it. She wasn't.
She gulped, her dry throat making her hiccup. She'd just get a soda.
From the vending machine.
She had a mantra.
'Soda machine, home, study. Soda Machine. Home. Study.' She releated it to herself manically. She coiled and uncoiled her sweating hands.
She'd taken anatomy. She could feel her swollen labia rub together as she walked. It was hot out, and about to rain. It was so, so humid.
'Soda! Machine! Home! Soda! Soda! Machine!' Stopping in front of the flashing neon 'relax relax relax' it blinked. She glared at it, burning up in front of it.
She spun, looking everyway. No, no. She thought. But she punched in the code. The woman on the cover fell forward into the tray. She cramed it into her pocket. Heart pounding, legs cold and numb.
Back in bed, the two offensive materials side by side.
It was exactly what she'd expected.
"Fucking" and "cunt" and "cock".
"Feeling him inside me" and "my quivering loins" and "his manhood!"
Her head spun as she looked back and forth.
Day and night.
"cum"
"heat rising below, cresendoing"
"yes, yes, oh, fuck me, yes!"
"His eyes, his chocolate eyes, they made me melt!"She closed them both, stacked them together like papers. And she reached for her laptop.
It was hot in her lap, its little fan whirring and it's battery burning. She'd sat in front of it a long time. What would she even type?
Finally her fingers flited across the keys. 'how to cum'. She clicked search, all balmy and hot. Her genitals throbbing with her heartbeat.
She settled upon a textpost with the same title, it had several answers.
Showerheards, carrot sticks, vibrators, pillows and stuffed animals all scrunched up.
She could recall bedding tangled around her as she tossed and turned, and how it had a warm tingle. Or how a very hot bath was...right in a way.
Having collected enough information, she slid everything onto the floor. And after washing her hands in the sink, came back to bed.