Of course Riku got the longest chapter... *headslams into my laptop* I don't even like this chapter!

Disclaimers: Kingdom Hearts is not mine and all that.

Also, this is the most gruesome chapter of this three-shot. I'm warning you now. Skip down if you can't handle it, hit ctrl + f and type in "December 25th" and hit the second result if you can't handle gore.

Also, all "lifetime #" are my own additions so you lovely readers can tell when they have jumped into a new life. Thank you. Please read and review.

All Too Easy

Lifetime 1

December 25th

Dear Sora,

It's easy, exceedingly easy to become a killer.

Maybe I should be saying that it's stupidly easy to become a monster instead. I'm not all that sure, actually. Either way, my story's not that interesting, not til that point. The point where I snapped… It was never all that interesting until that day, the day when I first started. But it was my life, our lives, and it was all I ever wanted.

That's why I had to do it. That's why I had to kill them. I hope you understand that. They killed my friends, they killed you and Kairi, and they expected me to just step back and take it. So, if you don't mind, I won't be saying that I'm sorry. Because I'm not. If I could go back knowing all that I know right at this minute and stop myself… well, let's say that I wouldn't. I'd just be a little bit more careful. I wouldn't have made the stupid mistake that let the cops catch me.

He deserved it. They all did.

… It's Christmas. It's Christmas today. Heh, you think that Santa's going to come? I almost wish I could believe that. Sora, do you still believe in Santa? I wonder about Kairi. Think she'll be making wreaths up in Heaven?

… I don't know why I'm writing this letter. No one's going to read it. I'll probably just burn it and hide under my blanket for the rest of the day. Fuck meal time. I'm not hungry. … If I skip, I bet they're going to take it as I have to go back on suicide watch. Fuck. I have to eat.

I can almost hear you guys scolding me, saying that I have to take better care of myself. I hate turkey, dammit, and nothing you can say is going to make me like it. … I wish I could hear your voices again. It'd make me feel better.

I guess I should write down what happened. My therapist – I have one of those by the way, apparently I got tried as not being in my right mind – says that it's better to let everything out instead of keeping it all bottled inside. That's how I ended up here in the first place.

Do you remember the dance? Yeah, I know, that's a really, really stupid place to start this but… that's where I feel it started. Me and you, Sora, remember that we went stag because someone already asked Kairi out? Heh, we ended up being dragged to like, every dress store on the island and wait for her to try on every single one of those dresses while she decided. She was driving us nuts because she said she looked stupid in all of them. … I wish I could go back to that afternoon.

The one she ended up buying was beautiful. I remember your face when you saw it, a big mass of purple fabric covered in sparkles, lace, and these big flowers. You looked like someone punched you in the gut and you couldn't stop smiling. … Maybe that's where it started. That smile. Dammit, Sora, why'd you have to smile like that?

I should have stopped it. I should have stopped all three of us from going to the dance. It wouldn't have happened if I had just seen those warning signs! I should have known!

l... I don't know anymore. You smiled and that's when I decided to give up on Kairi and to force you to face your damn feelings for once. I'd be your wingman and you'd finally get the girl. I remember thinking that this was how it was supposed to be. That was a weird thing. Even though I loved her too, even though I was more mature than you and more willing to know what I felt, older and stronger and smarter and just better than you, you were the one I thought deserved to have her. It was weird… but somehow… deep down inside… I knew you'd make her happy.

It was like I knew you were the one to make her happy. That you had done it before. It was this weird sense of déjà vu that made me sure that you two would be happy together.

Remember the tux store? Remember how Kairi made us go in there because we told her we were going to go in jeans? Sora, she damn near killed us. Hahaha, don't you remember how mad she got? She threw her heels at us! … I still think I looked stupid in the tux she picked out for me. I mean, baby blue with ruffles? Seriously? I swear she was messing with me, no matter how cute she said I looked. Ah, what I did to make her smile…

I never told you this when you were alive. Maybe I didn't have the heart, maybe I just wanted to keep it a secret until you were ready to understand you loved her, but… the second you came out of the changing room in that black tux… I swear Kai was going to pass out from how good you looked. … Maybe I should have told you. It would have made you laugh to see how much she was blushing and thank God you didn't notice it because you were too busy complaining on how tight the pants were and that it was itchy. She ran off to 'get some water', ha, she ran off to wash her face because she was starting to realize you weren't that little boy anymore.

I wish I told you. I wish I hadn't kept quiet. It would have made you smile, Sora.

… This hurts. I don't want to keep talking to you when you won't read this, Sora. I miss you guys too much. I hate this.

… Long story short… we went to the dance and I kept teasing you to snag a dance from Kairi. You were embarrassed as hell and kept saying no. That you didn't want to ruin her perfect night with your lame dancing. C'mon, you kept staring at her with those puppy dog eyes of yours and she kept staring back at you even when she was dancing with her date. It was so obvious, painfully obvious what you guys wanted. What did I have to do, smack the two of you with two by fours for you to get the hint?

… We should have run. If I knew what would happen, I would have ran. I would have taken the two of you with me and gotten off the island permanently.

After a little bit, I snuck over to Kairi and asked her if she wanted to dance. She got embarrassed and said no, that she had to wait for her date to come back from the bathroom. That she was hungry. Kai gave me like, fifty different excuses on why she didn't want to dance with me. I won't lie and say that it didn't sting a bit.

But when I leaned down and asked her if she'd dance with you, her eyes lit up like no one's business. Like fireworks had suddenly gone off. She looked so happy at the idea but she immediately tried to hide it. "Oh, Sora's not a good dancer," she said. Not no. You notice that? Not a no. She wanted to dance, Sora, and with you.

Dammit, why were you hanging out in the corner with Tidus and Wakka and playing basketball?

I practically dragged her out of the chair to go get you. I made Kairi swear up and down that she wouldn't say it was my idea and to make you dance. That you wanted to dance. Heh, the look on your face when Kairi asked you. Again, you looked like someone punched you in the stomach and you damn near passed out when she took your hand and you guys walked to the dance floor.

… One dance. It was only one dance. A slow dance, even. Even though you can't dance worth a damn, you two looked just perfect. Storybook prince and princess. If we had been voting for king and queen, I'm sure everyone would have voted for you two. Kairi looked happy. You looked like you were dreaming and didn't want to wake up.

You guys were falling in love that night and I'll even risk sounding stupid but it was a beautiful thing.

Too bad her date and his friends came back.

… He was pissed off that 'his' girl was dancing with some other guy, and especially because it was you. I think he could see that look in your eyes, that happy loving look. His friends immediately called Kairi a whore. You tried to calm them down and said that it was just a dance and that he thought Kairi was bored so he asked her to dance. … The guy didn't like that and his friends started shoving you, telling you to get the fuck away. I jumped in then, telling them to back off and trying to stop the fight that was starting up between you two.

He grabbed me and slammed me into the wall and well, I hit one of the decorations and got knocked out.

… I… I don't remember what happened next cause of that. Everything I know from this point came from Tidus and Wakka. … He… he threw you into one of the tables and took Kairi back to their table and made her wait there. She got up and started to beg him not to fight, but you jumped back to your feet, ran over, and slugged him in the face. I had no idea that you were that strong, but everyone said you shattered his nose. Not just broke, but shattered.

He grabbed you… and… well… you hit the edge of the table. But you got up and started fighting. Everyone said that even though you were outnumbered, you fought the best you could and until they threw you outside and into the dumpster, you were winning. Heh, you versus three guys that were bigger and stronger than you, and you were winning. I wish that could make me feel better.

… Your head hit the edge of the dumpster. The metal… snapped something inside of you. You… didn't wake up. I remember waking up on the floor covered in punch and these little sandwiches and hearing everyone scream. I remember thinking that someone had gotten hurt, getting up, and going to go look. I saw you there on the floor with Tidus screaming at you to wake up. Your eyes were wide-open but you weren't blinking and you were staring up at the sky in fear, like you were terrified of something.

Tidus told me later that you managed to say something just before you went. "Dammit, I can't protect her." I don't know what that meant, Sora. I have no idea what that meant. All I knew was that I was looking at your body.

… I.. I don't remember what happened after that. All I remember was everything going dark, Sora, everything going dark and then… the police were grabbing me and pulling me off of them. … They weren't moving. It was an accident. I didn't mean to do it but it felt so good. I couldn't stop crying.

… Kairi killed herself soon after. She died a few days ago and her funeral was yesterday afternoon. I couldn't go.

For some reason, I feel good about that. I know it sounds really messed up, Sora, but I have a feeling everything's going to be okay now. That I'll get to see you soon. Oh, it's almost midnight. I should go to sleep now. When I wake up tomorrow, everything's going to be okay. I don't know why I feel that.

Goodnight, Sora. Please… please let everything be alright tomorrow. I need to know that everything going to be alright.

Your best friend,

Riku

Note from the warden:

Riku Takamura has been found dead in his cell. Cause of death appears to suicide, specifically being hung from the ceiling with a bed-sheet. All personal notes and belongings will be sent to his family as soon as possible.

Lifetime 2

December 25th

Dear Journal,

Today's a weird day. I woke up crying. I don't know why, but I think it was because of some nightmare I had. I can't remember it, but I know something horrible happened in it. I think something horrible happened to Sora and to Kairi, but I can't remember what it was. I'm glad I can't remember my dream.

Anyway, we're all going to the beach today. Sora said something about making the world's biggest sandcastle and Kairi wants to go looking for seashells. Maybe I can finally get those two to calm down; they've been all excited for summer break for nearly two weeks.

Reminder: Gotta find good present for Kairi's birthday in a few weeks. No excuses. No help from Sora. He'll think of something stupid, like a baseball bat. Maybe a hat? Would Kairi wear a hat? No, no clothes. Keep thinking about it.

I'll write some more later, I need to get going now.

Forgetfully yours,

Riku

PS: Today's going to be a good day, I can feel it.

September 1st

Dear Journal,

I can't stop crying. I can't stop. It hurts so much. Oh god, Sora… Sora's dead. Sora died tonight and… Kairi's not expected to wake up. Oh god… this is all my fault…!

I have to write it down. I have to say what happened. Please, let this be a dream! I can still the flames, I can see the flames rising higher and higher on his flesh as he screamed and how he begged for me to catch Kairi, to get her out of the house. … Sora's house caught on fire. They were on the top floors and… the stairs collapsed. They managed to get to the roof and…

Sora's… clothes…

No… it can't be real… please don't let it be real… I couldn't have been the only one to have made it out okay.

Hahahahahahahahahaha, it's not real, right?!

Wake up, Riku, please, you have to finish it. You have to say it. Please… Oh, Sora, I'm so sorry.

Sora… jumped. It was from the second story. He should have been able to survive it but… he angled himself so that… his back was to the ground. Kairi was in his arms. His clothes were on fire. His clothes were on fire and… I … couldn't do anything. His clothes were on fire and as he fell, I heard something in his body snap. His… the firefighters, the doctor who did the autopsy said it was his spine. He broke his spine and for whatever reason, he couldn't breathe anymore and…

Kairi inhaled too much smoke. She's not expected to wake up. Her dad and the rest of her family's talking about unplugging her life support. She doesn't have any brain activity left.

I don't know what to do. Please, someone tell me what to do.

… I think I know what to do. I have a feeling if I do this, everything's going to end up okay. I have to kill Kairi. I have to unplug her myself. Then Sora'll be alive and she'll be alright. … I don't know why I know that. Oh god, what if I'm wrong? Please, please don't let me be wrong!

Riku

Lifetime 3

July 2nd

Dear Journal,

Well, it's official. Kairi and Sora are dating. Ugh, it only took them two years! Geez, they're eighteen already! They should have been together a long time ago.

Happy news aside … I guess since this is my personal journal, no one's going to laugh at me if I write something weird down. At least, they shouldn't, because Sora, if you're reading this, I'm going to fucking kill you. End of story.

Anyway… just a few days ago, I had this horrible nightmare. I don't remember much of it, but I know that I did something… terrible in it. The little I can remember scared the living daylights out of me. I… I'm starting to forget it. I need to write it down. So I can remember. Um… I was in a hospital room. Destiny Care's Intensive Care Unit, actually. I remember seeing a sign. I… I was in Kairi's room. She was under a sheet, fast asleep. She was in a machine and I'm not sure what it was for, I'm not a doctor or anything, but I think it was like one of those iron lung things. It was keeping her alive. … I unplugged it.

Is… is this some subconscious desire for me to hurt Kairi? Because she picked Sora instead of me? I'm not sure. I'm scared. I can at least admit that here. I thought I was stronger than this… Anyway, reminder for later: Riku, go get milk. Mom's on my ass about me drinking enough dairy. Ugh, college… Just really a new way for them to keep me under their thumb.

Cheers with a glass of milk,

Riku

October 3rd

Dear Journal,

Wow, it's been two years since I've touched this thing.

Huh. Time flies. Anyway… uh, well, I guess I should say my thoughts, eh, journal? Anyway, I'm twenty one now. The shots were awesome. That's not why I'm writing in here again. Well, the truth is that Sora and Kairi are getting married. I have no idea if I should be sad about it, since I love her too, or be super excited.

I'm going to be best man, that's all I know. Kairi is thinking about baby blue tuxedos for the "guys of honor." If she says we have to wear them, I'm shooting myself in the head. End of story.

Reminder: Pick up Sora's cousins Xion and Axel from Twilight Town. Xion's going to be maid of honor. … I wonder if she's cute. Hope so!

Reluctantly in blue,

Riku

December 25th

Dear Journal,

It's official. Sora and Kairi are going to have a baby. I knew it wouldn't take very long.

Sora wants to name it after me and Kairi wants me to be godfather. If I wasn't so tough, I think I'd cry from how touched I am. Heh, another Riku running around… I like the idea. It makes me happy just how well they've grown up, just how good Sora is to her, and how Kairi is blossoming into her future motherhood.

She can't stop crying and she's so excited that it's driving everyone (except Sora) nuts. Anyway, today she made me drive her to the store and get a crib. Yeah, just about seven months early. She started picking out clothes and she found a red jumpsuit that looked just like Sora's from when he was fourteen. … Kairi bought three.

This kid is going to end up a clown just like his dad, I can feel it. We just need the yellow shoes. I'm pretty sure she's looking for them already.

Anyway, gotta go. I have to run after Kairi and Sora and make sure that the hormonal lady doesn't kill him. We need to pick up chocolate, ASAP.

Laughing and so glad it's not mine,

Riku

PS: Also, date with Xion later tonight. Wish me luck, bundle of dead wood paper.

PPS: This is the most peaceful life I think I could ever have. You have no idea how happy I am and how happy those two knuckleheads are.