A/N: I realized this the other day, but my second chapter says it is chapter three. I am sorry for this. I combined chapter one and two so it would be longer, and forgot that I had done so. Please bare with me. I am going to label this chapter chapter 3 as well, so that i can catch up with myself. Sorry for the mistake! Please enjoy my new chapter 3.

"You cant jump the tracks,

were like cars on a cable,

and life's like an hour glass glued to the table,

no one can find the rewind button girl,

so craddle your head in your hands,

and breathe"- Breathe (2 a.m.) Anna Nalick

I looked at my mom with confusion. What could she mean? Its time I know something? My mom was my best friend and she never kept anything from me. What could be keeping from me?

"Edward and I were in love, we always have been. But Jacob, He has always been my best friend. When Alice threw me a birthday party, I was opening a present and got a paper cut. Nothing major, but the second Jasper caught my sent, he lost it. Nothing to bad happened. Your father got him under control, but your father decided it would be better for me, safer for me, if he wasnt in my life. I felt lost without him. I didnt funtion right. Jacob started to ease the pain. The pain was of course still there, but when i was around jacob, he made it disappear for awhile. Your father went to the volturi when he thought i had died because Alice had a vision of me cliff diving. I went with Alice to save your father from his death, which would have resulted in mine. Jacob was my best friend. I loved him. But it wasnt until Victoria and her army of newborns were a threat to us that i realized, i loved him more then a friend. The only reason that i finally realized my feeling's for Jacob, was because i knew they wouldnt change anything. I loved Jake, but i was in love with Edward. Jacob helped your father deliver you, and the moment he saw you..." She paused to smile as big as she had smiled in awhile. She seemed happy to tell me what was coming next. "The wolf's legends all came true, but Jacob thought one would never apply to him. Imprinting. The moment he saw you, he knew he was wrong. He impinted on you."

How could they keep this from me? Especially my own mother? Even Jacob! I cant take this! If they kept this from me, what else had they been keeping from me? I didnt want to find out.

"Jacob is the best guy for you. And I knew you would love him, I always hoped you would love him in this way as well. I want to see you happy, and i want Jacob happy too. Jacob will protect you better then any one will." Mom kept rammbling on, but i didnt hear her. I jumped up, looking out the french doors leading out to a balcony.

I made my decision fast. I ran to the balcony and jumped off the ledge. I heard my mom calling after me, but i blocked it out. I ran and ran, not sure of where i was going. I had stopped running when i made it to the spot where Jacob and I went all the time.

It was an open area with a lake and flowers everywhere. The blanket we had brought out here a few years ago remained in the same spot as always. I felt my phone vibrate in my pocket and pulled it out, knowing it was either my dad, mom, Aunt Alice, or Aunt Rosalie. I was wrong. It was Jacob. I let it go to voice mail, not really wanting to talk to him right now. When i got the voice mail i checked it.

"Hey, Ness. I will be there in three minutes. Cant wait to see you. Usual spot. I hope youll be there. I love you." His voice seemed calm. I couldnt help but wonder if he knew that i knew?

I heard a slite rusle behind me. I couldnt turn around. I couldnt look at him right now. He sat down beside me, and layed his hand on mine. I didnt pull away, but tears started rolling down my face. When Jacob saw the tears, he turned my face to look at him but i closed my eyes.

"Ness, whats wrong?" He asked. I went to turn my head, but he held it in place. "Hey, whats wrong." I looked away from him. "Hey, Look at me. Say something, please."

"What do you what me to say Jacob? That its ok that for eight years you've been lying to me, thats its ok that you only love me because of some stupid spell shit, thats its ok that you and my mom dated? What the fuck do you want me to say Jacob?" I said as i stood up and began to walk away.

I heard him jump up. "How did you find out? I wasnt allowed to tell you yet. Edward told me to wait until your ninth birthday." He said.

"Look, i get it. You love me. But its only because of some spell or some shit. If it wasnt for that, you wouldnt have anything to do with me. I cant take every one lying to me and hiding things from me! I just cant take it!" I ran off, Jacob tried to catch me, but had no chance. He knew i was faster then him, so why he even tried i dont know. I wasnt for sure where i was going. I was just glad when i got to seatle air port. I pulled out my credit card and bought a ticket to Italy. I knew aunt alice could only see me sometimes, and she would see this.

I fell asleep on the plane. I woke up and found the nearest hotel room. I went to the lobby later that night and went to the girt shop. I bought a notebook and pen, and then went back to my room where i started writing.

Dear Aunt Alice,

Im sorry I left without saying where i was going. I know you know where i am right now, and i imagine you are on your way here, but when you arrive, I'll be gone. The truth is, I dont want to come home. I dont want to be around anyone right now. I just need some time for myself. I hope you all understand. I really do. Im sorry if i've scared you guys at all. Just know that i am alive, im fine, and i'll be home soon, I just need some time to figure things out. I need time to think things out and find who i really am. Im more then just a hybrid vampire human. Im nore then just a girl with a unique name and a beautiful face. I need to find out who i am on the inside. Please, just be patient. I'll be home soon.

-Renesmee Carlie Cullen-

APOV(Alice Point Of View)

I saw everything the letter said. I understood now, that Renesmee would stay in contact with me threw this notebook if i just watched for her to write in it. The next letter came very soon, saying..

Aunt Alice,

Italy so beautiful. The trevic fountian is more beautiful then i could ever imagine. The peoples accents are beautiful. But nothing more. Italy is nothing more then beautiful. All of the guys i ran into would ask me to go to dinner, but i said no to them all. Thats all they see in me. Beauty. I want people to look at me and see more then just that. I imagine by now dad has canceled the credit card. I took about six thousand dollars off of it, hoping that will give me enough money to make it awhile longer. Im on a plane right now to Australia. I dont know what Australia holds for me, but im hoping there i can find an answer to who i really am. I love you, Aunt Alice. If you could please, keep my letters from the others. I dont want them to be upset that im only talking to you. But you can see the letters as i write them, and you can know that i am ok. If i were to actually send the letters, then Im afraid Dad would come to the address on the letter and bring me home. Im not ready to come home.

-Renesmee Carlie Cullen-

I had to wait two days for the next letter to come to me. I saw Renesmee struggling to fight back the tears as she wrote:

Aunt Alice,

Astralia held no answers for me at all. NONE. Neither did Turkey. Im in Russia right now. The people here are so strange. They wont look at me, say hi, hold a door open for me or anything. I think I like it here. Im being treated like everyone else. No one is giving me special treatment or anything. But Russia isnt helping me find myself either, so off to the eiffle tower i go.

-Renesmee?-

Aunt Alice,

Is it possible that no matter where i go, i wont find myself. That i wont find out who i really am? Im thinking I have three more stops, or well, five, actually. India, Mexico, Canada, China, Japan, and then a mystery for the last one. Maybe ill get some answer's soon.

-your confused niece-

I could tell by the way she closed the book, that i wouldnt get another letter for awhile. She always seemed to write the letter around 9 at night my time, knowing that by then her father had left for the cottage with Bella. A few times Jasper has asked me what i saw, but i would just smile and let him know it was nothing to worry about. Mostly just people around the house and things they were going to do.

The next three days i was so worried. I watched my thoughts around Edward, but every night, I sought out Nessie, having no luck. Finally, the fifth night of no letters, I got one.

Aunt Alice,

Im going to be at isle esme for awhile. I remember mom telling me how it always took away her stress. Im hoping it will do the same for me. I may not write to you much when i get there. I love you, Aunt Alice. For some reason, I feel like only you, Uncle Jasper, and Aunt Rose know how i truely feel. I will be home soon. I love you, very much, Aunt Alice. Thank you for keeping our letters a secret.

-3-

I Saw that Renesme would go for a walk along the beach tomorrow around three oclock and return around four thirty. If i were to get on a plane in two hours, that would out me getting there at three thirty, and the house at four. I jumped p from the couch in the living room and ran to my room, packing up some clothes and things for two days. Then i went to Renesmee's room and grabbed some things of her that i could tell she would want. I then made my way down the hall to my room and grabbed another suit case for her things.

I grabbed the suit cases and went to the garage and put the bags in the trunk of my porshe. I was just about to close the door when Jasper was holding it open.

"What are you doing my dear?" He asked.

"Jasper, I want to tell you, but i cant. I'll be home in either tomorrow or the next day. Please, dont question, just let me go. I cant tell you where or way im going, Edward will read your thoughts and get mad at me. I love you." I said.

"Okay, I trust you, dear. Please return home safe." He leaned down to kiss me before opening the garge door for me.

RPOV

I was walking back to the house now, and when i neared the house, I caught the sent of Alice. She was here. I took off running towards the house. When I opened the door, she was sitting at the island in the kitchen. I ran up to her and hugged her as i started crying.

I missed her so much. I let go to look at her.

"Renesmee, Ive missed you." She said to me. "When are you coming home?"

"Right now. I realized something. Going to all the different countries, trying to find myself, I realized, who i am, where i belong. Its at home. Im so sorry! I never should have left. Im so so sorry. I hope no bodies mad at me." I said.

"Sweetie, i have been waiting for you to realize this."

"You knew this would happen, you saw it? Why didnt you tell me?"

"I knew it was a lesson you would have to figure out on your own. I didnt want to tell you, because i knew you would disagree. Everyone is waiting for you to come home. It will shock them when you arrive tomorrow."

I was finally going home. I was going back to where i belong, to myself, to who i really am.

A/N: Lets say, three reviews this time for the next chapter. I would like to thank my readers. A little insight to chapter four:

Renesmee is now home, and has finally found out who she is. Everything is starting to fall into place for her, or so she thinks. When someone tries to interfere with her happiness, her and her family will do anything and everything in their power to keep her safe, even if it means someone losing their live protecting her.