Medulla «the nothing song»
Creeno
What with finals being over, Christmas feeling like summer, and some quiet music, StandfordYears!Dean has sudednly emerged. Blame Iceland.
You don't want to feel anything right now.
All you want to do is drive, drive, drive, and forget that Sammy, your Sammy, never existed.
You want to forget how he felt when you curled around him, clutching your sawed-off shotgun, protecting him at night when it was just you and him in a nasty hotel in the middle of Bumfuck, Nowhere.
You erase it with monotony and alcohol.
And it's nice, this empty feeling. You're not bubbling, full of emotion anymore. You're just Dean Winchester, following his father's orders and trying to forget your brother ever existed.
You tell yourself that you like this empty feeling, even when you wake up with tear tracks on your face or you turn to speak to him only find empty-space.
Empty is good.
Less opportunity to get hurt more than you are.
Empty is bliss.