Never a Dull Moment
by Criminally Charmed
Disclaimer - Not mine.
Chapter Three - John
John Tracy put aside a star chart he had been researching and saved his notes on his latest book, smiling as the interviewer sat down across from him.
"Emily said you were writing about how Alan changed lives," John nodded towards his wife as she set down two glasses of ice tea. Thanking her with a smile which only broadened as Emily kissed the top of his head, John turned his attention back to the interviewer.
"Alan was amazing to all of the family from the day he was born. You have to understand – he was a "surprise" as Mom liked to phrase it. Our parents were worried we would resent him. Instead, he was like the best toy we ever had. I used to sneak him out of his crib to show him the stars."
John became very solemn as his mind wandered back. "For more than three years we were such a happy family. Sometimes I wonder if we were too complacent in our happiness. It felt like nothing could go wrong."
"It was the first real family vacation we had in years. We had gone skiing. Mom loved downhill skiing. Dad had taken Virgil and Gordon off to try a run while Scott, Mom, Alan and I were playing in the snow near our cabin. Scott and I had moved away from the path Mom and Alan were on when the avalanche occurred. They were buried. Scott managed to find Alan and he was rushed to the hospital, Scott watching over him the whole time. Dad had returned and was searching for Mom while I was sent back to the cabin to watch over Virgil and Gordon."
"He found Mom. We buried her back in Kansas two days after we got Alan out of the hospital." Looking out the window, John gave a sad smile. "Dad considered moving her to the island after we moved here. But Mom loved changing seasons. And Scott would tell us she was always in our hearts, and that was what mattered."
John sighed. "I had trouble remembering that when Mom first died. Alan reminded me."
John sat silently in the living room, trying to read a well-worn copy of "Return of the King", but found himself unable to focus on the classic novel. It was simply too quiet in the house. It always seemed to be quiet, ever since Mom died. Gordon had stopped laughing and playing jokes; Virgil no longer played the piano; Scott had become a grownup overnight. The worse things were Dad and Alan. Dad seemed to vanish from their lives since the funeral, leaving for work before they got up and coming home after everyone but Scott was asleep. Sometimes John was tempted to ask his only older brother if Dad was still alive, but figured no one else would find it funny.
And Alan? Their baby brother hadn't said a word since he had been pulled from the same wall of snow that had buried their mother. The doctors said it wasn't anything physical, just the emotional trauma of the avalanche and waking up to discover Mom was dead.
Looking over at the three year old, his left arm still in a cast and a patch of hair still sparse where it had been shaved due to the stitches that were removed almost a month ago. Setting down the book, John moved over and sat on the rug next to Alan.
"Hey, Allie – what 'cha doing?" John joked in a sing-song voice from Alan's favorite cartoon.
Alan looked up silently at his only other blonde brother, his wide blue eyes filled with a heart-breaking sadness. John smiled weakly at the toddler before checking out the drawing on the table in front of the little boy.
Usually, Alan's pictures were filled with color and cheerful figures. Now, Alan seemed to have only picked dark colors. John could recognize Alan and their house, both drawn in black. Sighing, John pulled his youngest brother close. The teenager knew a shrink would have a field day with the picture.
"But then we would have to admit we have a problem," John thought, a touch of resentment running through his mind. "And Dad would have to be here for that."
John sighed again. "I guess I just couldn't understand back then. But Emily almost died when Keith was born. I don't know how I would have coped with it if I had lost her. And the irony was, I did the same thing when Emily was unconscious. I didn't even vid-call Elizabeth. She looks so much like her mother, just like Alan looked like our mother. I had long ago forgiven Dad – but then I realized, it wasn't my place to blame Dad. I really didn't have the right."
"You know what? I mentioned all this to Alan one time and he said he hadn't blamed Dad. He was just glad to realize Dad had never blamed him for surviving when Mom died. That poor kid – he thought that was why no one was talking. I didn't realize how much I helped Alan by just taking time every evening to talk with Alan."
Two weeks later, John once more finished getting Alan into his pajamas. Scott peaked in to check on the pair.
"Johnny – you need a hand?"
John smiled down at Alan, overjoyed to see a shy, answering smile in return. Looking up at their oldest brother, John shook his head.
"Nah, we're good, right, Allie?"
Scott nodded, happy to see life heading back into his blonde brothers. John was once more reading, even if it was stories to Alan. And Alan was showing emotion, the latest smile was the sixth he had shown.
"Gordy's staying at Grandma's and Grandpa's," Scott reminded John. "He has a swim meet in the morning. And Virgil is studying at Sarah Jane's. Mr. Woodbury says he'll bring him home by nine-thirty."
"Where are you heading?" John asked, gesturing to the keys Scott held in his hand. Scott was barely fifteen and had his learner's permit, but wasn't supposed to be driving without an adult.
Scott shrugged. "We're out of milk, bread and cereal. We need breakfast and with Grandma going with Grandpa and Gordon to the swim meet, we can't wait until she comes home tomorrow. I'll ask Dad if we can set up a grocery delivery system. Mr. Miller could probably set up something with the basics. Then we would only have to get Grandma to help once a month or so. And I'll have my license within the year."
"Why not just tell Dad?" John snapped.
Shrugging again, Scott said nothing and walked away, twirling the keys to their mother's minivan as he walked down the stairs. John suspected Scott may have mentioned the simple problems they were going through. Since Scott was often the only one who saw Jeff, John wondered if the oldest Tracy son was giving up and assuming yet another duty left in the absence of both parents.
"At least Mom died, she didn't choose to leave us," John thought bitterly. "Dad's acting like he's the only one who lost Mom."
Sighing, John turned to pick up Alan and put him to bed. To his shock, the little boy was gone.
"Allie!" John cried out, panicking. "Where are you?"
John continued to call his brother's name as he ran through the empty house. As he moved through the family room, John came to an abrupt halt when he noticed the patio doors open. It was a spring evening; John became alarmed at the idea of his little brother out on the cool, damp lawn –
Out on the patio, John froze at the sight of Alan looking up at the stars. With bittersweet memories, the second Tracy son recalled Lucy sitting out here, telling her sons myths and legends of the constellations. Sometimes Jeff would come up, at times just to listen, at times to tell them stories of space exploration. As far as John knew, no one had been out here since the night before they left on the ski trip.
"Hey. Allie," John spoke softly, reaching down and picking the little boy off the wooden swing. Seating himself back on the swing, John positioned Alan on his lap, wrapping his arms around the tot. Setting the swing to a gentle motion, John followed Alan's gaze.
"You like that constellation, Allie? Um, those stars? That bunch of stars is called Orion. The ones you can see the clearest are known as Orion's belt." John then began to tell his little brother the story Lucy Tracy had once told her older son.
As John finished up the story, he slowed the swing as Alan had curled into his brother's chest, rubbing his head against John's shoulder. John smiled and kissed the toddler's head. The older brother was surprised to find how relaxed and happy he was, reconnecting with the stars he loved so much.
"Mama," Alan whispered.
John looked down at Alan in shock, almost dropping the little boy. Clasping the three year old closely once more, John followed his brother's gaze once more. Alan's wide blue eyes were fixed on the heavens, on something he alone seemed to be able to see.
Alan turned back to John and smiled, pointing to the glittering stars above. "Mama up there, yes, Johnny?"
Part of John wondered if Alan was trying to grasp the idea of their mother being in heaven when he looked, truly looked, at the stars. Warmth filled his heart, knowing somehow that Alan was right. And he knew their mother was there, encouraging her silent baby to speak once more.
"Yeah, Allie. Mama is up there. And I promise you, baby boy – I'll find her someday, OK?"
Alan sighed and curled back into John's chest, quickly falling asleep. Standing, John began to carry Alan inside, pausing to look at the night sky once more.
"I'll be back, Mom. Sorry I was gone so long. But I'll be back."
"Well," John explained calmly, "I know I couldn't actually find my mother as most people would understand it. But I was still fairly young when I was sent up as part of the International Space Station. It was while I was up there that I discovered a star I named for Mom. This led to further discoveries and now America and several other countries are once more exploring the heavens. If Alan hadn't forced me to remember just where I could reconnect with Mom, I don't know if that would have happened. Do you know the research being done on the expanded space station? The world is being changed for the better because of it. And while many give me a large part of the credit, I give it to Alan."
Smiling at the stars as they began to emerge in the tropical sky, John noted where Thunderbird Five was and silently greeted his youngest brother, the only other Thunderbird who enjoyed space as much as he did. Maybe when Keith grew old enough, there would be another, but for now, it was mainly John and Alan.
"Alan gave me back the stars," John said softly. "He became our strength after our mother died. And life was never boring with Alan around. Yes, he does have a way of keeping things interesting. Never a dull moment with my little brother."
A/N - Just a quick note. Real life has given me a kick in the teeth this week. Work was crazy all last week, my daughter goes back to school tomorrow so lots to do. Then my Dad...well, he's not doing well at the moment. And I am about to leave to the one-day surgery. For me. So I managed to update this story but will not be updating Alan and John Walk into a Bank. But I should be back next week with BOTH stories. Take care. ~ CC