School Days
By Dominus Princeps
Disclaimer: I don't own DBZ or Golden Sun. Or "Boulevard of Broken Dreams".
Chapter Three: Insomniac Night Fever
"Can't we work this out?" Yuan screamed, barely dodging the wooden club. Nebilim's swing tore a hole in the wall.
"Die, you blue-haired bastard, die!" Nebilim cackled, already in the second stage of berserking that Yuan had heard of. There were three stages. The beginning, in which the berserker becomes enraged, the middle, in which the berserker goes...well, berserk, and the end, where the berserker collapses from exhaustion. Yuan never actually read about how long the middle lasted, which was currently causing him some dismay as Nebilim tore large holes in Yuan's house and broke various expensive background items and eye candy. The bat took out Yuan's legs in an unexpected sweep slash. With a malicious gleam in his eye, Nebilim brought the bat up behind his head. Thinking quickly, Yuan swung his foot into Nebilim's crotch...which, terrifyingly, did nothing. Nebilim swung the Baseball Bat down at Yuan, who rolled out of the way just in time. The house shook as the bat impacted into the floorboards of Yuan's room...and then the entire floor of the room collapsed, sending Yuan and Nebilim tumbling down to the first floor. Nebilim hit the ground and sprang to his feet. Yuan faceplanted.
"Waaah!" Yuan shrieked as the wooden death machine passed inches in front of his nose. He rolled backwards to his feet and jumped through a window, deciding that it would be best to take the fight to the outside. Yuan pulled out his double-bladed sword and waited. He heard no sounds. Yuan continued to wait. He checked his watch. Nebilim still wasn't coming. Yuan checked his watch again...then was sent sprawling as the Baseball Bat collided with his back.
"Oof! Ouch, ow, bad, crap!" Yuan hissed as he bounced and tumbled down the road.
"Hey, you crazy kids, keep it down!" Maxwell, Yuan's next-door-neighbor, shouted.
"Sorry, Mr. Maxw-aaaaah!" Yuan started, hurtling through the air yet again as the bat nailed him in the side. Nebilim advanced on the blue-haired boy, chuckling. Yuan rolled onto his back, groaning.
"Ugh...M-Martel..." he muttered, panting. Nebilim raised the bat again and brought it down...but it never connected. In fact, it disconnected. A sword sliced it in half.
"Hey...don't mess with the lovesick fool," Kratos glowered, streetlamp gleaming off his sword. The wind rustled his hair in a very dramatic fashion.
"Grrrrraaaaah! You must die, too! Ha ha ha ha ha!" Nebilim cackled, swinging the broken stump of the Baseball Bat at Kratos. He smashed the Twinkie in Kratos' hand. Suddenly, the wind picked up.
"You...you...How dare you?" Kratos roared. A vortex of air surrounded the purple-clothed boy. Energy collected into him. Suddenly, blond hair at least fifty feet long streamed from Kratos' head.
"He's...he's gone Super-Saiyan 7!" Origin gasped from across the street. Kratos lifted into the air.
"You shall die, unworthy mortal! I summon the power of the demonic Guardian. I summon...Come, Dullahan!" Kratos boomed, his voice shaking the street. A rift opened in the ground. A horrible wrenching sound caused everyone on the block to clamp their hands over their ears. Then, a gigantic suit of headless armor pulled itself from the void.
"Formina Sage!" Kratos and Dullahan roared in unison. Dullahan's huge sword pulsed with lightning, then slashed into Nebilim, who, despite his berserker rage, screamed in pain. Nebilim collapsed to the ground...soon followed by Kratos, who, drained of energy, slumped over. Yuan picked himself up slowly.
"Ugh...my freakin' side...ow..." he muttered. He then observed Kratos.
"Whoa...Kratos, you okay?" Yuan asked, worried. Kratos shakily tried to unwrap a Twinkie. Yuan did it for him and fed the pastry to Kratos, too. Kratos instantly leapt to his feet, energized.
"Thanks for the save, man," Yuan sighed, "I owe you one."
"I was in the neighborhood on one of my angst-filled night roams and heard screams, thuds, and shit getting broken, so I decided, eh, what the hell, might as well leave my angst behind and bust some heads," Kratos shrugged. Yuan scratched his head.
"So...that's why I always feel like someone's watching me when I'm lying awake at night? Because you're wandering around out here?" he asked. Kratos laughed.
"Hell no. I don't watch you. That's creepy. I mean, not like an angst-filled wandering isn't creepy, but, you know, there's plenty of angst in the world; it's not that weird to be angsty and wandering; it's weird to be angsty and stalking someone. Angst is okay. Angst is-" Kratos explained.
"Shut up about angst! I swear, if you say angst one more time, I'll cut your head off! ...anyway, I just wanted to know if you watched me," Yuan interrupted. Kratos blinked and unwrapped another Twinkie. A moan caused them to whirl. Nebilim was stirring.
"Aw, crap..." Yuan muttered, "You didn't kill him."
"You're right. I'm such a failure..." Kratos sank to the ground, hair covering his eyes and making his expression unreadable.
"Damn it, this is no time for angst!" Yuan growled.
"It's always a good time for angst!" Kratos retorted.
"You're...both going...to die!" Nebilim chuckled slowly, rising to his feet in a very evil and dramatic fashion.
"Kratos, if you don't help me, we're both gonna die here, and no one will ever hear of us again! Think of the people who you influence every day!" Yuan tried to encourage Kratos.
"I wanna die. I'm a failure," Kratos muttered. Yuan rolled his eyes, pulled a Twinkie from Kratos' pocket, and threw it at Nebilim, who promptly stepped on it, annoyed at the projectile.
"Kratos, he just stomped a Twinkie," Yuan pointed out. Kratos rose in a flash, sword drawn.
"It's go time," he growled. With a battle cry, the rusty-haired boy charged the freakishly red-haired Nebilim. Nebilim blocked the flurry of slashes with the broad edge of his axe and retaliated with a Rising Punishment. Kratos backstepped to avoid the vicious attack and sent a Demon Fang-Fierce Demon Fang-Super Lightning Blade combo back at Nebilim, who was momentarily stunned. The time it took for Nebilim to regain his balance was just enough for him to fail to dodge the Thunder Blade Yuan cast his way. BOOM-BZZ-ZZ-ZZ! Nebilim staggered backwards, crackling with electricity. If his hair wasn't already defying each law of gravity, it would definitely have been at this point.
"You weaklings will pay for that display!" Nebilim snarled. He rushed Kratos and switched to his Twin Blades, letting loose a three-slash into Raging Beast combo. Kratos barely blocked the combination and was thrown off guard (literally) when Nebilim switched his attack style to his Greaves and kicked Kratos square in the chest, sending the boy skidding backwards across the pavement.
"Eruption!" Yuan cried, grinning as Nebilim was engulfed in a violent spray of lava. The demented red-haired man sprinted out of the lava (much to Yuan's surprise) and raised his axe above his head.
"It's wood-chopping time!" Nebilim cackled. He tensed, about to swing the axe down, when Yuan held up a hand.
"Wait, wait: 'wood-chopping time'? Did you just say 'wood-chopping time'?" Yuan blinked.
"Well, I couldn't think of anything else to say. I mean, it's a gigantic axe," Nebilim lowered his weapon.
"Yeah, but come on: 'wood-chopping time'! That's not even menacing. It's just stupid!" Yuan shook his head.
"Okay, if you're so smart, here's the axe," Nebilim handed Yuan the massive weapon and lay out prone in front of the blue-haired boy. Yuan raised it above his head.
"You say something clever and evil!" Nebilim glowered. Yuan held the axe in that position for a few seconds.
"You're right. All I can think of is chopping wood," the blue-haired boy chuckled. He shook his head.
"Wow. That's weird," Yuan admitted. Then, his eyes widened.
"I've got it! 'Well, I guess two halves are better than one!' Hiyaa!" Yuan began to swing the axe.
"That's pretty lame," Kratos remarked, walking toward Yuan. Yuan rolled his eyes. Nebilim sighed.
"Look, it's really freakin' hard to think of something menacing and witty to say when you're holding a gigantic eighty-pound axe, Kratos," Yuan glared.
"Give me that," Kratos held his hands out. Yuan handed him the axe. Kratos raised the axe over Nebilim's supine form. He blinked.
"Huh. That's strange...for some reason, all I can think of is chopping wood," the rusty-haired boy tilted his head. Nebilim and Yuan nodded, rolling their eyes.
"No crap, Kratos," Yuan glared. Kratos pondered the axe for a second.
"How about this: UNISON ATTACK!" he roared, swinging the axe.
"'Unison attack'? What kind of corny-" Nebilim began. The axe connected with him, and suddenly he was standing between Kratos and Yuan.
"Super Lightning Blade!" Kratos cried, stabbing Nebilim.
"Thunder Blade!" Yuan yelled, casting the spell. The lightning bolt and the huge sword of electricity impacted at almost the same time.
"Let's go!" Yuan cried. "Super Thunder Blade!"
"That's not a compound Tech," Kratos glanced over at Yuan.
"I know. But it sounds like one, doesn't it?" Yuan shrugged. Kratos rolled his eyes and sighed. Nebilim staggered backwards from the sudden assault.
"That was a pretty clever line, Kratos. Just one question—how'd you build our Unison Bar so fast?" Yuan asked.
"I slashed at a tree while you and Nebilim were talking," Kratos replied.
"You may have won the battle, but the war is far from over!" Nebilim growled, leaping up. He ran off into the night.
"I think that was our most eccentric fight with him yet," Kratos noted. Yuan nodded.
"I'm gonna hurt tomorrow. But there's no way I'm getting to sleep after all this hubbub," Yuan sighed.
"...Did you just say 'hubbub'?" Kratos raised an eyebrow.
"Shut the hell up," Yuan shook his head and walked off.
ooo
Kratos walked down the empty street. For some reason, words came into his mind, but he couldn't figure out where he'd heard them. He started to sing them.
"I walk a lonely road, the only one that I have ever known. Don't know where it goes, but it's home to me, and I walk alone," Kratos sang. Then he was struck by lightning.
"You're ruining the dimensional continuum between your world and ours," said the author.
"Hey, I didn't do anything to you!" a very crispy Kratos shot back.
"I'd tell you to go to hell, but that would end up sending you there," the author growled.
"What, do you think you're some sort of god?" Kratos challenged.
"Actually, yes. Watch this—Twinkie Monster!" the author yelled. Suddenly, a gigantic Twinkie with red eyes appeared, then just as quickly disappeared.
"That was amazing..." Kratos gaped.
"Yeah. So don't cross me," the author glared.
"Get back here right now and explain why you're ignoring me!" a voice called from somewhere behind the author who was currently peering through a giant hole in the sky.
"Uh...gotta go, Kratos, the girlfriend's calling," the author disappeared suddenly. Kratos sat down in the grass of someone's front yard, pondering what had just occurred. But suddenly, he just couldn't remember the exact details of the encounter—
"Are you kidding? Of course I can! Suddenly, this guy appears in the sky, and-" Kratos began.
LIKE I SAID, Kratos couldn't remember the exact details of the encounter. As he tried to remember them, they slipped from his memory, like dreams in the morning.
"Well, the guy appeared when...when...wait, you're right, I can't remember a thing!" Kratos gasped.
See? Now get on with the story.
ooo
Yuan stumbled into his room, overcome with exhaustion. He collapsed into his bed, not even taking his clothes off before covering himself with the blankets. As he closed his eyes, it seemed like someone was watching him. But Yuan didn't care. He was really freakin' tired. Some strange music played as the scene dimmed, alerting Yuan that his HP and TP were fully restored.
ooo
Martel stared at the ceiling. For some reason, she couldn't sleep. Her thoughts kept returning to Yuan...he was such a silly boy! Always blushing suddenly, tripping over things when he was watching her instead of the ground...but she liked him for that. Martel sighed and swung her legs over the side of the bed. She walked over to the window of her room and looked out to the street. Someone was walking down the street...but he seemed to be slightly charred. However, the ridiculously spiky hair could only belong to...
"Kratos...?" she murmured. Martel pulled a nightdress over herself and walked down the stairs and out the door to the front lawn.
"Kratos, what are you doing out here at this time of night?" Martel called to the charred boy. Kratos turned to face her.
"Martel, you should be asleep," he replied, gazing at her from the side of his eye.
"I could say the same to you. Now, what are you doing here?" she said evenly.
"Tricky. I was just wandering around. I don't need a lot of sleep," Kratos shrugged.
"Must be from all the sugar you eat. Hey, have you seen Yuan? I mean, I know it's late, but...since you two are close friends, I thought..." the blond girl scuffed her feet.
"We had a short fight with Nebilim. It wasn't that bad," Kratos shrugged, unwrapping a Twinkie. Martel rolled her eyes at the snack.
"He's a really irritating person. I wish he'd stop fighting us. Maybe we can talk it out..." she sighed.
"Oh, and I'm sure he'd just sit down civilly and speak with us. Working out a truce with Nebilim is like my recipes involving tomatoes—no one's gonna end up happy, and somebody's gonna get hurt," Kratos mused through a mouthful of Twinkie. "Although, that would make Nebilim happy...the people getting hurt part. Unless it's him. then he wouldn't be very happy. Well, unless-"
"I understand," Martel cut off Kratos's rant.
"Interruption is impolite," the rusty-haired boy glared, squaring his shoulders.
"Relax, Kratos," Martel said soothingly. He grunted and unwrapped another Twinkie.
"I guess we should get to bed. It's late," Martel suggested. Kratos shrugged.
"...Indeed," he remarked, walking off. The blond girl shook her head and headed back inside.
"Sweet dreams, Mithos," she said as she passed Mithos's room. The boy turned over in his sleep.
ooo
"Should I directly attack Twinkie Kid and that blue-haired bitch?"
Nebilim shook his Mana 8-Exsphere and looked into the small window on the bottom.
"'Ask Again Later'? What shit is this?" the red-haired boy roared. He asked the question again and shook the exsphere.
"'Ask Again Later'? This is rigged!" Nebilim snarled. He pulled out a grindstone and set his axe down to the spinning stone.
"Death is inevitable..." he hissed.